A/N: Written (late) for the April round of D.Gray-man flashfics on LiveJournal.

1.) This will almost certainly be an alternate-universe fic in a week or two, unless I'm more psychic that I give myself credit for. If you're reading this after Hoshino-sensei's revealed what the new HQ is going to be like, please don't review informing me that this version and her version don't match up. That's kind of a given. Thanks.

2.) The lake mentioned herein actually exists, without the island for obvious reasons. In the livejournal version of this fic, I link a picture. If you want to see it, go to the community eiasraintales and look for this fic.

3.) That's all for now, kids. Enjoy the fic.

-Eia

xxxxx

Castum Caliga

xxxxx

"Well, here we are," said Komui brightly.

Kanda stared out across the dusky expanse of water, stopping only when his eyes hit the far shore a good mile away. He hated looking like an idiot, and knew that Komui knew this, which was doubtless why he was waiting for Kanda to snap before explaining what the hell was going on. Kanda knew when to choose his battles, and this was not one worth bothering with. "Supervisor," he growled.

Komui beamed at him, clearly relishing this small victory. "Why, what's the matter, Kanda-kun?"

He gritted his teeth and shut his eyes to block out as much irritation as possible. That made it possible, for now, to answer without stabbing his supervisor with Mugen until he begged to explain. "Where is the tower."

"Right there," said Komui, falsely bemused, gesturing broadly out towards the middle of the lake.

"I don't see anything."

The supervisor's face cracked. "Well, naturally," he crowed delightedly. "It would be rather inconvenient if it were so easy to spot. There are several towns near here, it would hardly do for them to go for a nice walk on the beach and see us."

"It's invisible," translated Kanda. He looked back out across the lake. There was definitely nothing there. Not even a ripple out of place. "That's impossible. If this is your idea of a joke, Supervisor, I'll cut your ears off."

Komui frowned paternally. "I thought we already had the talk about threatening people, Kanda-kun. Shall we go through it again? Much better results can be achieved by--"

"No," gritted Kanda, perversely wishing one of the others was here to make Komui behave. Linali would be ideal, but he'd even take Allen at this point. He needed information, and he did not want to spend two hours dragging it out of Komui along with his teeth. "I don't want to have the talk again. I want answers. Where the hell is the goddamn tower?"

The supervisor sighed, adjusted his glasses-- the very picture of beleagured grace. "So impatient, Kanda-kun. Very well then. Just for you, I'll cut the fun short. Follow me."

Kanda looked heavenward in a rare moment of gratitude and followed him down the beach to a pale, narrow spit of sand jutting out into the black water. Night was very close. The lake grew eerier with each passing minute. He was not easily frightened, but there was something forbidding about this place that set his teeth on edge. His hand grasped Mugen's hilt for comfort as the darkness deepened.

"Here," said Komui, smile finally gone. It was down to business now, at long last. "You may find this easier with your eyes shut. It's designed not to be found even by accident... it's difficult to explain, even for me, so you had best just follow me. Deep breath now."

Frowning, Kanda followed him out onto the sandspit. He still saw nothing but beach and water.

Ahead of him, Komui walked straight off the end of the spit-- onto the water.

"That's impossible," Kanda said again. "What the hell."

"Come now, Kanda-kun, this way," cajoled Komui, echoing oddly. "I promise you it's safe."

"I never said I was scared," he snapped, then strode after the supervisor strongly to prove his words. He wasn't afraid. Really. He was just naturally uneasy because walking on water was impossible and someone was doing it right in front of him. And now he was about to do it too. Perfectly reasonable. "This is so screwed up," he muttered under his breath, but kept walking.

Beneath his feet, the sand suddenly took on an entirely different texture. He stopped dead and stared down at his feet, which appeared to still be buried in sand. He took another step. His boots clunked tellingly against the 'sand,' which did not give way and was weirdly smooth beneath his feet. He looked up at Komui, who looked unbearably smug, and took a few more steps with his eyes shut. Now unable to see the sand, his other senses clearly told him he was treading a cobblestoned walkway. After a few more, his steps began to echo the way he'd heard Komui's voice do a few moments ago. His ears now told him him he was enclosed by walls and a ceiling approximately twice his height both tall and wide.

He opened his eyes. Water rippled peacefully beneath his feet. The sky stretched its twilight expanse overhead, exactly the same as he remembered it from a few minutes ago but for a few changed cloud formations. The beach was several yards behind him.

"What the hell," he said, thoroughly disturbed.

Komui's joy was palpable. "Isn't it brilliant?" he asked, practically glowing. "I worked on this for years. I just wasn't expecting to get to demonstrate it so soon. Cross will be annoyed that he wasn't here to gloat."

"Cross?" echoed Kanda dumbly.

"Oh, yes," said Komui. "Half the credit for this belongs to him. I'm very good at science, you see, but absolute bollocks at magic. Without his insight into my theorems this would have all fallen flat."

There was something wrong with this, besides the obvious. Something about-- "When did he have time?" wondered Kanda out loud, pinpointing the wrongness. Cross had been away from Headquarters for nearly five years now, chasing the Noah and their Ark across Asia. Komui had always whined about not being able to get in contact with him, had even gone so far as to send a team of Exorcists out to find him and protect him. If he had done all that-- nearly gotten Allen and the others killed just to cover up for the fact that Cross was still in contact with HQ-- Kanda was going to kill him. Slowly.

Komui walked back to him and hastily waved his hands in Kanda's face. Sometimes, the man was more perceptive than he pretended to be, especially when it had to do with his own mortality. "Oh, no, don't get the wrong idea," he said frantically, correctly interpreting Kanda's thunderous expression. "This tower has been theoretically operational for nearly six years now. Marshall Cross left shortly after its completion. We simply had no reason to move here, as the old tower was closer to Rome and was as of yet uncompromised. We wanted to keep this place as a backup plan, in case something terrible happened. Which it did, of course, so now we're here."

"You're happy about this," stated Kanda flatly.

"No!" cried Komui, shaking his head vehemently. "No, of course not! The old tower was my home for many years... well lived-in... all the comforts of the city close by... of course I'm not--"

"Supervisor," growled Kanda.

"All right, maybe a little!" wailed Komui, wringing his hands.

Kanda snorted in disgust and stalked past him down the invisible hallway. It was the strangest thing he had ever done, which was saying quite a lot as Kanda had done some very strange things in his lifetime. He kept expecting every time he put his foot down for it to sink into the fathomless dark water, but it never did. His feet always stopped a few inches from the surface... with a jolt as he underestimated the distance over and over again because he could not see what he was landing on. It was extremely uncomfortable. He resisted the urge to crawl on his hands and knees. It would be easier if he could feel the stone with his hands, but damned if he'd give Komui the pleasure of an embarrassing story to tell the others.

It took them easily twenty minutes to reach the tower proper. It would take considerably less time once they were accustomed to the invisibility, Kanda mused. The bridge was straight and smooth, easy to walk if one trusted it.

"Here we are, watch your step," said Komui, seemingly out of the blue.

"What?" snapped Kanda grouchily.

"The door--"

Kanda hit a wall of nothing full-force. "God damn it, Supervisor!" he raged, massaging his face. "Say something earlier!"

"Sorry," replied the supervisor, sounding not at all contrite. "I still have trouble figuring out exactly where the door is, especially when I haven't been here in such a long time. Is your nose all right?"

"No thanks to you!" said Kanda, vowing silently to light the coffee supply on fire next chance he got. "How do you open this thing?"

"Good question, Kanda-kun. Pay attention now." Komui turned to face what was presumably the door and cupped his hands over his face. "Open sesame!"

"You have got to be kidding me," muttered Kanda.

The door creaked open. He heard it coming just in time and stepped back hurriedly. Something swept past his face at alarming speed, the angle of the wind suggesting that it had missed his well-assaulted nose by mere inches.

"It opens outwards, I take it."

Komui nodded and smiled. "After you," he said, gesturing forwards. The patch of lake in question glimmered invitingly before them. "It's quite all right. However, being somewhat cautious would be commendable. It can be quite startling the first time--"

Kanda wasn't listening to him. He snarled and stalked forwards the last few steps into the invisible tower.

Abruptly, there was a floor. And walls. And a ceiling.

Despite all his best efforts, Kanda fell over.

The sudden appearance of an entire room around him where before there had been nothing but wind and lake and sky was simply too disorienting for his mind to deal with all at once. Vertigo ripped through him. He clung to the floor for dear life and prayed devoutly for the madness to end.

"All right there, Kanda-kun? I did warn you."

"Die, you bastard," moaned Kanda, and instantly wished he hadn't opened his mouth. First of all, he sounded pathetic, not nearly as threatening as he should. Secondly, the urge to vomit was now nearly irresistable.

With great effort, he took a deep breath and tried to reorient himself.

It was embarrassingly difficult, especially since Komui was standing over him, apparently completely unfazed. He had not felt so humiliated in years. The minute the world righted itself, Kanda decided, he was going to kick his superior just concave enough to make himself feel better, but not enough to prevent him from working. His desk was bad enough as it was. Kanda shuddered to think what it would look like if he died.

A strong, wiry hand gripped his shoulder and hauled him upright. "There. Feeling better? It's just a room, look."

Kanda risked opening his eyes, and was rewarded with the realization that Komui was right. It was just a room. A very large room. A very large room paved with polished black marble, with vaulted stone ceilings high overhead and truly grotesque gargoyles lining the walls by the dozen. It looked like a medieval church gone terribly wrong. Kanda knew instantly that Komui had designed it to be as awful as possible just to watch the reactions of every person entering the tower for the first time.

Even more horribly, Kanda realized that within a year, he'd find this hallway comforting and homelike when returning from missions. If he survived that long, in any case, he would begin to love this monstrosity as he had loved the old tower. Not that he had ever admitted feeling anything of the sort for the old tower, or feeling anything of the sort for anything at all. Kanda did not love things. He found them useful, or respected their presence in the world because they were stronger or bigger than him, but he did not love things. The old tower had not been home for him any more than this one was going to be. Really.

"It's hideous," he said finally. "Please tell me the rest of it is better."

"Depends on your definition of better," replied Komui predictably. "I personally find this room quite delightful. I designed it myself, you know."

Kanda did not reply to that for fear of accidentally killing him.

At the end of the entry hall was a great wooden door with brass hinges, painted forbiddingly with dull black. Each of the doors sported a stylized eye in red, both of which were closed.

"Good evening, Gatekeeper," said Komui pleasantly.

Without no warning whatseover, the eyes snapped open and a lush red mouth bared its jagged red teeth.

Kanda recoiled in shock and realized a moment later from the keen humming resonance in the air that he'd drawn Mugen.

"Put that away, Exorcist," murmured the face.

Why was it exactly the colour of blood? That was unnecessary. It was terrifying enough in its own right without that. Kanda had a suspicion that while the hall belonged to Komui, this door belonged to Cross. He had only met the marshall a handful of times, but this seemed to be exactly the kind of thing he would go for. Especially since the face, now that he had calmed down enough to look at it, was that of a surpassingly beautiful woman who was not Linali. The suspicion became a certainty.

"My apologies, Gatekeeper," he murmured, and sheated Mugen. It was never a good idea to get on the bad side of one of these beings. This one barred the way into the one safe place in all the world. Making it angry at him would be very stupid to say the least.

"Accepted," hissed the gate. Its voice was feminine and high, but weirdly blank and monotone. There was an echo to it that made it sound almost otherwordly.

It was, quite frankly, the most frightening thing Kanda had ever confronted, including the Earl and his Noah cohorts in full demonic glory.

Then she smiled.

"Welcome, my lord Komui," she said happily. "Dear Exorcist."

Kanda stared at her. The smile had completely transformed her. She looked positively friendly now, as though glad to see them. The echo and flatness were both gone from her voice, making it sweet and gentle. "I-- er-- thanks," he stuttered. To his consternation, he could feel himself blushing. She really was very pretty... for a splatter of blood-coloured paint with sharp teeth.

"Welcome to Castum Caliga," she said demurely, splitting in half to swing open welcomingly. "Enjoy your stay."

"Castum Caliga?" Kanda said disbelievingly. "The dark castle? How... original."

"I thought it sounded dashing," Komui said defensively. "I wanted to name it William, but Cross refused."

"William."

"I think it's a lovely name for a home."

Kanda ground his teeth. "Homes don't need names, Supervisor. Especially not names like William."

Komui adjusted his glasses and smiled condescendingly. "Oh, Kanda-kun. You're so dull sometimes. Honestly, where is your sense of humour?"

That was the last straw. Kanda eloquently summed up everything he'd been through in the past hour by slamming his fist into Komui's nose, which gave way with an extremely satisfying crunch. The supervisor shrieked and spluttered, pulling away to shield the assaulted extremity with his hands and stare at Kanda with deeply wounded eyes.

"Ha, ha, ha," said Kanda flatly. "Where's my room. I'm going to bed."

"I wuz hobing to led you chooze your own," mumbled Komui through his hands. "Thoughd you migh' lige dad. You know, bunching beeble widoud warning izzen berry nice."

"Whatever," said Kanda, feeling very far from guilty. "Lead the way."

"Meen," said Komui reproachfully, but led him down a hallway to the left.

Then right, then right again, then left four times, then right again. Then they climbed sixteen flights of stairs. Kanda was not out of breath, being a very good warrior who trained his lungs and legs for hours every day, but... "Isn't there a faster way to get up?" he asked.

Komui scowled at him petulantly. "Mebbe. Could be. Da bossibilidy exishts. When my nose heals, mebbe I'll dell you. Ivvid heals."

"It'll heal. Don't be so pathetic. This is my room?"

"Ivyou wannid."

Kanda walked over to the narrow window and looked out over a spectacular view of the lake. The moon was rising now, and there was a broad wash of silver over the surface. Beyond that, forested hills stretched as far as he could strain his eyes. Between two of them nestled the gentle yellow glow of a small town. Looking down, he saw to his surprise that the tower was perched on a sizable island. Most of it was wooded, which was good. Kanda liked trees. They made wonderful practice, and didn't talk back. Near the beach on the north side was a lovely clearing away from the main grounds which would do well for his customary solitary training. The room really had a wonderful view. "Yes, I want it. Now, if you wouldn't mind getting out."

"Meen," said Komui again, and stuck his tongue out at Kanda in an amazingly childish gesture. He left. The door closed behind him with a gentle creak.

The room was dark but for the moonlight, but that little bit was enough for Kanda to find the lantern on his bedside table and light it with matches he found in the drawer. Doubtless there was a brilliant lighting system in place in the ceiling that Komui had spitefully not told him how to operate, but Kanda didn't really mind. He didn't much care for high technology anyway. The lantern's soft, wavering flame was reliable enough for him.

He sat down on the bed. It was firm, and the blankets were thin but soft and numerous, exactly how he liked it. He laid back with a weary sigh and stared at the intricate mandala patterns tiled into the stone ceiling. It occurred to him to wonder if Linali had had a hand in designing them, but he dismissed the thought as soon as it came. He didn't care who had made the stupid swirly pictures in the ceiling. They were there, and they weren't gargoyles, so he was content.

Tomorrow, the rest of the Exorcists and Finders and staff of the old tower would arrive. He was suddenly grateful that he had come a day early with Komui to get the new tower ready-- if he had come the next day with everyone else, they would have all seen him fall over like an idiot. Irritating and exhausting as this night had been, he grudgingly admitted that it could have been much worse.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow, the others would arrive and flood the castle with their irrepressible energy and optimism. Allen would doubtless come and find him and drag him all over the island exploring with Lavi. Crowley would probably stand on the roof in the wind and stare off gloomily into the distance towards where his old castle had once stood, not too far from here. Miranda would look after him and wring her hands uselessly as usual. Linali would be everywhere at once, helping her brother set everything up and bring the castle to life.

Kanda grinned despite himself thinking about it. By the time evening fell the next day, this place would be bustling with life and cheer. The thought should have made him scowl with irritation, but if he was honest with himself, he looked forward to it a little. It would distract him from thinking of the old tower-- his home for most of his life-- lying in smoking ruins so many miles behind him. His chest twisted painfully at the memory.

Catching himself, he sneered. Getting all teary over a stupid pile of stones. Such thoughts were pointless... ridiculous... weak... what was he thinking about again? Everything seemed kind of foggy.

He yawned widely.

Oh.

It was late, and he would have to be up very, very early tomorrow morning to escape Komui's devious clutches.

The moon lit the room with its steady wash of silver even after he blew out the lantern. Soon he'd have to find some curtains to block out the light or he'd never get... any... rest...

Sleep rose up and claimed him like the dark waters of the lake below, and Kanda gave in.

Tonight this was a dark, strange tower that smelled wrong and felt wrong and looked even worse.

Tomorrow, it would be home.

XxxxxxX

A/N: I would pay to see Kanda fall over in canon. I would pay rather a lot.