Derek and Meredith are not mine.
Derek had to pull over on his way back to his land. His land where Meredith is waiting. That morning he was ready to give up. He was ready to accept the fact that he will never have his "happily ever after." But now things have changed. In a blink of an eye, things have changed. Beth was awake. She had woken up and she is doing great. He couldn't tell for sure but the clinical trial looks like it's going to be a success. After talking to Beth and her parents, he had left the hospital with every ounce of him screaming to be with Meredith. He had spent the entire night looking, only to find her surrounded by candles on the spot on his land. And what she had to say, it was not what he had expected. He wanted to hear them for a long time, but he didn't think she'd actually say those words at that time.
And now he had to pull over and breathe. Because the feeling is just too overwhelming. He had gone to talk to Rose who surprisingly took everything nicely. And he was supposed to be driving back to his land. Back to Meredith. But he needed a moment to breathe. Because it was all too good to be true. It's like he is in some Disney movie and everything just gets into the right place for the hero. Except that it's real. So he needed to breathe. His life was about to change, he knew it. He can feel it. It felt good, knowing that this is a good change. But he is also nervous as hell. There many things he wanted to say. So many things he needed to apologize for, so many things they have to talk about. So he took a 15 minute breather, because needed to be prepared. He needed to be prepared in case Meredith decided that she still wanted to yell at him. Because she had been yelling. And failing. And pacing. Which was adorable and led to him kissing her. And she kissed him back. She kissed him back. And it felt so damn good.
Rain started to pour as he pulled up in front of his trailer. He immediately got out of the car when he saw Meredith running for the trailer. By the time he got to her the rain was already pouring down hard. He took of his jacket and held it above their heads as they ran for the trailer.
"Oh..." Meredith breathed, as they entered the trailer. "Wow…I'm soaked!"
"Me too," Derek laughed as he went and pulled towels out of the drawer. "Here."
"Thanks," she smiled taking the towel and began drying her hair.
Derek watched her. "There's um…."
"What?"
"You…you still have some of your clothes," he said pointing to the drawer where she kept them. "You could…I mean, you should go get changed."
"Okay," she stood up and walked to her drawer. She got a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt. "I'll um…I'll go change."
"Take your time," Derek smiled cheekily.
She rolled her eyes at him. "I'll just be a minute." And then she gave him a smile before she disappeared into the bathroom.
Derek sighed, a smile spreading across his face. It felt good having her around here again. It felt right. He ran his hand though his dripping curls as he stood up and went to the kitchen to make some hot choco. He walked back towards the bedroom with a mug of hot choco when he heard the bathroom door unlock.
"Your turn," Meredith said.
"Okay, here." He smiled handing her the mug. "I made hot choco."
"Thanks," she took it gratefully.
Meredith took a sip of the hot liquid and sat on the edge of the bed. She held the mug between her palms and sighed. She had no idea what was going to happen next. And the slight burning feeling on her palm gave her comfort.
"Hey." Derek walked out of the bathroom furiously rubbing his hair with a hand towel.
"Hey." Meredith looked down into the mug, suddenly fascinated by the hot drink.
"Meredith," He moved and sat beside her.
"I'm still mad at you," she murmured.
"I know. And I…I'm…I'm sorry." His voice cracked with emotion. "I know I've done a lot of stupid things. Things that hurt you. And I…I just…fail you. Over and over."
"Derek…"
"No Mer, it's true. I know that. And I…I.." He moved and knelt in front of her, holding on to her sides and looked at her. "I know nothing I could say will make any of it go away. I…I…"
"Derek." She placed her palm on his left cheek and kissed him. Her hand slid to his curls and his hands made their way through her hair. The kiss was slow and soft like the one they had in the middle of their 'house-to-be.' When they stopped for air, Meredith rested her forehead against his. Both had their eyes closed savoring the moment. Only their breathing and the sound of the rain hitting the tin roof could be heard.
"It's okay," she whispered after a while.
Derek shook his head. "No. No it's not Mer. It's not okay."
"Okay," she pulled away to look at him. "It's not okay. But it will be." She smiled.
Derek didn't know what made this change in her. He was going to find out later. But for now she was smiling at him. And he was a sucker for that smile. He couldn't help but smile back when she smiled like that.
"It will be." He nodded and gave her a quick kiss before taking the mug out of her hand and stood up. He was on his way towards the kitchen when he remembered.
"Where's the Champaign?"
"Oh God," Meredith hid her face in her hands.
"What?" Derek laughed. "Did you drink all of it while you were waiting for me?"
"No," Meredith pretended to glare at him. "I sat down on the grass…in the room with the great view…"
"The living room." Derek supplied.
"Yeah, the living room," she nodded and smiled fondly. "Then it rained and I got up and ran and I….forgot…the Champaign." She finished guiltily.
Derek chuckled. "It's okay, Mer. It's just Champaign. We could go get it tomorrow." He said as he went to place the mug in the sink.
"But it was supposed to be out victory dance." She frowned. Derek laughed to himself, even if he didn't see her, he knew she was pouting.
"Yeah," he said coming back towards the bed where Meredith stood. "Victory dance," he whispered to her as he came and encircle her with his arms and swayed her to his own music.
"Derek.." she giggled her protest but she closed her arms around his waist and she happily allowed him to sway her from side to side.
"Sshh...we're victory dancing."
Meredith couldn't help but giggle again. "Okay." Then she quieted and rested her head on his chest and closed her eyes. This was a first. This was their first time dancing together. They were in a trailer in the middle on nowhere. There were no party lights and they were dressed in sweat pants and t-shirts and they have the only the rain for music but it perfect. Meredith knew she would always remember this moment. Then she yawned. The swaying was lulling her to sleep and Derek was warm and comfortable and it had been a long day.
Derek chuckled. "Sleepy?" He murmured as he placed on her head.
"Hmm.." she nodded against his chest, not opening her eyes.
"Okay," he said, stopping his movements. "Me too. Let's go sleep."
Meredith wrapped her arms tighter around him and groaned. "Don't want to move."
"You're really cute when you're sleepy." He laughed.
Meredith then pulled away. "Shut up." She said, playfully hitting him on the chest as she moved to her side of the bed and began taking the covers off. Which made Derek laugh even more.
"What? It's true." He said as he laid down beside her and spooned her. Meredith found his hand and weaved her fingers through his, an old habit she did with him and it made him smile. He buried his face in her hair and inhaled. Lavender. He loved that smell. He didn't think he's be able to hold her like this again but now here they were, in his trailer, holding each other.
"Mer?"
"Hmm?"
He swallowed the lump of emotion that had suddenly built up in his throat. "I missed you." His voice wavered as he spoke. There was a beat of silence. He thought she had fallen asleep. But then she slowly turned and faced hi, her tired, sleepy eyes shining with tears.
She traced his jaw line with her thumb. "Me too. You know that." She said, a tear finally slipping down her cheek. Derek gently wiped it away with the pad of his thumb, his own eyes watering.
"I'm sorry Mer, I'm so sorry."
"Shh…Derek," she placed a finger on his lips and replaced it with her own. "I want us to be happy tonight. We can do the talking thing tomorrow. But tonight, happy, and…sleep."
"Okay. We can do happy." Derek agreed and gave her another kiss. "We do the talking thing tomorrow. So I can do more than kiss you."
"Okay." She smiled and gave him one last kiss before turning to her sleeping position.
Derek turned to put the lights out and went back down, kissed Meredith on the cheek and spooned her. Meredith once again finding his hand and lacing it with hers. He smiled as he once again buried his nose in her hair. "I love you, Meredith." He whispered to her.
Meredith brought his hand toward her lips and kissed it. "I love you too."
Now here we
stand
Unafraid of the future
At the beginning with you
fin