A/N: Well, here we are. It's been a fun ride with you! I regret that it took me x amount of years to get the gumption to finish the LAST chapter…..

-Gin

Chapter Ten: FINAL: Root of all Evil

-X-

"Kakuzu, why don't you want to train?" I asked, sitting in my new favorite chair, upside down as usual. Deidara and Kisame, my new clique, sat next to an uncomfortable-looking money stasher. I stifled a giggle at his awkward disposition, knowing that he had problems with the two men beside him. After all, because of me, Deidara and Kisame thought he was a bastard. And he had truly been a bastard, at least for the last few months.

It wasn't my fault the greedy guy decided to make me his subordinate through any means he deemed necessary! Being the dumb blonde prototype, I helped him achieve his goal. Why, though, did he ignore me now that I was his subordinate? He confused me, and being the stubborn jackass I could be, wanted to put an end to the mystery.

"I'm sorry again, if that's what it takes!" I flailed, giving him a sad face. I bet that my frown came off as more of a smile due to my upside-down position, and wanted to blame his lack of a reaction on that.

"Satsu-senpai, I'll help you train if you'll edit my page in the Bingo Book, yeah," Deidara offered, smiling a crooked smile. I grimaced. That always had to come up whenever I became friends with someone.

"Yeah, could you put something like 'Is terrified of bunnies' in mine? I'd love to see their reaction to that!" Kisame laughed, and so did the rest of us. I'm pretty sure that an ANBU whipping out a bunny and getting slaughtered is what all four of us pictured. After some laughing, I shook my head.

"I can't guys. I can only put true things in the Bingo Book. I can leave out information I find irrelevant though," I said sadly. Honestly, the bunny thing was brilliant.

"Why can't you?" Kakuzu asked, finally breaking his silent treatment. I shrugged (which was difficult to do upside down) and sighed.

"The jutsu my teacher put on me won't let me. I'll almost put my pen on the paper, and it feels like the pen is electrocuting me," I said, frowning. I watched as Kisame nodded respectfully.

"That… makes sense, yeah. I guess that makes you an honest source, you know?" Deidara added, waving a hand. I grinned; I was glad he understood why I couldn't do anything too crazy in the Bingo Book.

After a little whittling down, Kakuzu agreed to train with me, but not to spar. I guessed asking that much so soon was a moot point, seeing as it was only a few months after his humiliating defeat in front of everyone that mattered in the world.

-X-

"For the last time Kakuzu-kun, I'm not going to teach you that jutsu!" I growled in frustration as he held my favorite kind of lollipop just higher than I could reach. Deidara was laughing hysterically as I lunged after my candy, only to be thwarted by Kakuzu's height advantage.

"Oh, come on," I grumbled, crossing my arms and marching away from the group of laughing shinobi. Why didn't they respect me? I could kick all their asses if I set my mind to it, and they still blew me off. I thought of ways I could pay them back. A grin stretched its way onto my face, impish and evil if charming.

"Kakuzu-kuuuuuuunnnnn," I called in a sing-song, sugary-sweet falsetto voice. The man in question stiffened in the shoulders, turning towards me. I continued to walk until he was facing me completely, and then sprinted into his arms. Kakuzu caught me, completely bewildered, and I pulled his mask down, planting a kiss on his lips. Both I and my lollipop were unceremoniously dropped by the choking and bright red miser.

Catcalls and wolf whistles echoed down the hall as I pixie-skipped to my quarters, strawberry banana lolly unwrapped and planted firmly in my grinning mouth. My heart pounded faster than it had in years, adrenaline rushing through my every nerve.

"What is wrong with you?" an incredulous whisper echoed behind me in the hallway outside my room. I turned, a hand on my heart to slow it down. Kakuzu stood a few feet behind me, arms crossed. Mimicking him impishly, I leaned on one leg with my arms crossed in what an old contact of mine called the Femme-Nazi pose.

"I could ask the same question," I retorted, standing my ground. An eyebrow rose, and he stood silent for a moment.

"What is that supposed to mean?" he finally queried, growing angry. I groaned. Was there no man in the world with mind reading powers?

"It is supposed to mean 'What the hell am I still here for?' Kakuzu," I growled, adjusting my footing. I was sick and tired of loitering in a musty hideout instead of hitting my usual towns, bars and casinos. I hated the permeating boredom that seemed to crawl under the doors like a fog. And most of all, I hated being ignored by the person who got me in this mess, Kakuzu.

I was confused. How did he going from hating me, to liking me, to pretending I didn't exist? Was it all some twisted game of his? Did he seriously not know what I was feeling? A relationship consisted of more than stolen hugs and kisses. What did we have then?

"Why am I here, Kakuzu?" I asked, dropping my arms to my sides and approaching him. He stiffened as I stood before him, staring into his green eyes. Emotion flickered, concealed behind his neon irises. He felt something; I knew it, but what?

"You could have easily gone to a brothel, if that was what you needed, but you haven't. And if it was a new partner you wanted, you haven't found a creative way to dispose of Hidan, so that isn't it either," I rationalized, ticking those options off with my fingers. The hallway was very still, almost suffocating, as an uncomfortable moment of silence hung between us. Like a ship in a frozen harbor, I made little headway with the stonily quiet man.

Sighing, I turned away, heading into my room. A sound escaped Kakuzu's lips, and I stopped for a moment, but he didn't say anything. Too fed up to wait, I pulled open my door.

"I would have helped you with the Hidan thing, you know," I mumbled as I closed and locked the door in his face. Turning, I peeked out the little peephole on my tip-toes. Kakuzu stood a few feet from the door for a few minutes, as if deciding whether or not to do something. Slowly, he turned and walked away. I groaned again, walking over to my bed, flopping down on top of the covers.

This sucks, I thought, grabbing some senbon from under my pillow to chuck at my calendar on the ceiling. I kept it there so I knew what I'd need to do every morning as soon as I woke up. Setsuna had told me once that I had obsessive compulsive disorder when it came to scheduling, and I agreed.

A senbon lodged itself in tomorrow's square, and I squinted at the date. It read March 1st. I threw my lollipop stick in the can across the room with perfect aim, hearing a ka-thunk as it hit the metal trashcan.

I had a date with Arisugawa Kei, the cute almost-thief from my first Akatsuki mission! I checked the next few days on my calendar, and saw that I had them off. Swinging off my bed into a crouch, I grabbed my travel bag out and began to pack.

-X-

Dawn came too quickly, and soon I was faced with the daunting task of sneaking out of the headquarters without being caught. Not that I wasn't allowed to leave, I mean c'mon, it was my day off, but answering hard questions would most likely be involved, and after a difficult, tiresome night, I wasn't up to it. Sneaking around would do just fine.

It wasn't too difficult to make it to Leader's office and leave him a note, but once I got outside, I had to hide behind a column for nearly ten minutes as Hidan and Deidara got into a heated art versus religion debate. There was no way in hell I would get involved in that argument! With my luck I would be simultaneously sacrificed and blown up for saying I thought both concepts were boring.

After Hidan and Deidara moved on with their lives and down the hall, I tiptoed all the way to the exit with no disturbances. I decided to skip Setsuna's place, opting for getting to Kei's location somewhere in the northern River Country by nightfall.

Once I got into the rainy forest surrounding the Akatsuki's base outside of the Village Hidden in the Rain, traveling was smooth and the weather was alright, if a little damp. I ran through the trees at high speeds, never running into a soul. Although I didn't mind taking countryside all the way there, I had that feeling that I was being watched. You know the one that the characters in horror movies tend to ignore before they die a brutal and gory death?

I shuddered to quell the chill creeping up my spine. I told myself to think rationally, and started a few evasive maneuvers. Soon enough I was in my happy place, nearly certain whomever was following me (if anyone) was successfully ditched. Nothing like a few dozen miles distance to set you at rights!

And although I was comforted by the absence of eyes on my back, I still felt a little guilty about leaving without saying goodbye to anyone. If only I could ditch my conscience.

-X-

A lone house stood on a hill, silhouetted by a rising moon. The windows glowed a warm, rich gold from the lights inside, giving it a welcoming, cozy look. I jumped and landed lightly next to the chimney, peaking in through a window. Two people sat at the fireside, a male and female. Both were facing away, but I could tell they were awake. A low murmur of conversation leaked through the window.

I stalked to the other side of the house, ducking below the windows to avoid being seen. One of the occupants of the house was most assuredly Arisugawa Kei, his messy blond hair being a dead giveaway and unmistakable. The other person surprised me though. The voice I heard through the window was definitely female; his mother perhaps? No matter, I'd just have to catch him alone.

I left for my lodging, my surveillance equipment set up and ready for a night-long stakeout.

-X-

My eyes shot open to reveal nothing but a plywood desk with some drool and a peaceful screen showing the Arisugawa residence. I must have fallen asleep for a few minutes. What had caused me to wake though? I closed my eyes again, searching for chakra signatures or noises. I could sense nothing by way of chakra, but that didn't mean nothing was there. After all, most jounin knew how to mask it pretty well.

The clock on the wall revealed I had been asleep no more than half an hour. I glanced around the room and nothing seemed out of place. Just the usual futon, telephone, and pastel walls.

I rewound the surveillance tapes, scanning to see if the girl had left. About 5 minutes before I awoke, a pretty blonde girl that must have been my future apprentice's sister left the house. Time to go in for the proverbial kill? Possibly. I considered whether or not I wanted to jump in and go so soon, but in the end the hasty decision won over. Time to go fishing!

-X-

"Oh Kei-kun!" I said coyly, poking the boy in the stomach. For a ninja he sure was a hard sleeper!

"Wakey wakey eggs and bakeey!" I yelled in his ear. The poor kid tried sitting up, only to meet the restraints I had used on his wrists and ankles.

"What the hell? Oh, it's you…" he exclaimed, hoarse and groggy. I giggled. I was glad at least someone remembered me!

"Don't worry, I'm not into S&M or anything, I just didn't want our little chat deteriorate to our fists doing the talking. Anyway, are you one hundred percent yet? I have a proposition for you."

Before the kid could say anything, I was thrown against the far wall, scooped up and face to face with a pair of angry neon green eyes.

"What the hell do you think you're doing? The Akatsuki has invested way too much money for you to be freelancing at a time like this!" Kakuzu raged.

"I figured you wouldn't mind my absence." I deadpanned. This was not the right time to confront me. I had an impressionable youth waiting for me, after all just (forcibly) waiting for me to corrupt him.

"You know taking on an apprentice means you are taking a permanent absence." He said, not glaring, but also not detached emotionally. I almost couldn't tell what he was thinking! It was time test him one last time.

"Exactly." I replied.

"Stay in the Akatsuki." Kakuzu ordered. His eyebrows pointed downward ferociously. He seemed a little off, too serious almost. Perhaps Setsuna was right.

"Why should I?" I replied petulantly.

"Because I want you to." I was stuck by the simplicity of his reply. Without really thinking, I locked my lips onto his for a real, honest kiss. Fire spread through my veins, adrenaline pumping like it came from a damn that just broke. He kissed back, reservedly at first, the returning with force. At last I separated from him to catch my breath.

"Okay."

"Just because of a kiss? This is like a bad fucking soap opera! Get a room douche bags!" Kei yelled as he struggled on the bed. Kakuzu and I merely glanced at him before obliging to his request. After all, we some…. things to finish.

Walking side by side, finally, I realized how much tension there really was between us now that it had alleviated.

"Hey wait, let me go first!"

-End-