The Challenge, a fullmetal alchemist fanfic

Well here I am, ignoring my other story(s) with a oneshot. Haha, I got the idea when I was hanging out with my own Roy-kun. That's as specific as it gets. I can't remember how, I just know that's where I got the idea. xD

If you didn't catch it in the summary...this is Roy/Ed. Don't like, cilck the back button on your browser now.

Disclaimer: Hiromu Arakawa owns FMA, and I'm glad she does. I'll settle for just owning my fanfics and fanart.

Edward Elric crossed his arms and stuck his nose up in the air. "I'm mad at you."

There was a laugh. "You say that, but we both know you won't- no - can't stay angry with me." Roy Mustang stood from his seat behind his desk, crossed the room and stood behind Ed. "Because all I have to do is…" He trailed off as he ran a finger down Edward's chest, only stopping at the top of his pants and tugging on it. "...and you'll come crawling back." He gently kissed Ed's neck looking for that sweet spot, like a vampire about to bite its victim.

The younger alchemist jerked away. "So you're saying I'm weak?!"

"No, I'm just saying that you can't resist me." Roy took a step towards the blonde, closing the space created milliseconds before.

Edward rolled his eyes. "Yeah, you're not full of yourself."

Roy, ignoring Edward's comment, grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him into a forceful kiss. Roy was sure this would end their little squabble, but to his dismay, Fullmetal pulled away.

"Nuh-huh. You know what? I'm so mad; I'm not giving you any sex."

Roy blinked in shock but quickly recovered. "Don't make promises you can't keep, Fullmetal." He snuck up behind Edward again. "You're the one who can't last without it." He began licking Ed's ear. "You like it too much."

Edward swatted Roy's tongue away. "No way. You're the sex-obsessed pervert! You probably couldn't even last a month without sex!"

Roy raised a dark eyebrow. "Is that a challenge?"

Edward blinked. "…Y-yeah! That's right! It's a challenge!"

"Well, if it comes to that, I doubt you couldn't live without it that long either!"

"We'll just have to see then!" Edward said; a determined look in his golden eyes. "If I win, you have to take care of all that military crap for me for three weeks! I'm talking reports, missions, the works!"

Roy nodded. "Fair enough. But If I win, you have to do whatever I say for three weeks."

"Deal!"

They shook on it.

"We're not starting until tomorrow though, right?" Roy asked.

"HA!" Edward jabbed a finger in the Colonel's direction. "See?! You don't think about anything but sex!"

"You didn't say I couldn't think about it." Roy replied. "You just said I had to go without it."

Edward huffed and turned to leave while Roy returned to his chair. Both one-hundred percent sure they'd win.

"Day seven. How's it going Colonel Bastard?" Edward leaned over Roy's desk a week later. "Miss me yet?"

"What about you?" Roy asked, his eyes closed and his chin resting on his folded hands. "Miss the moaning as I make you writhe in pleasure? Because I know you're very good at that part. I might even have to install sound proof walls."

"For your information, I don't miss it one bit." Edward growled in response. "In fact, I'm even sleeping better at night."

"Lies."

"What?!" Ed twitched.

"You've got bags under your eyes and your eyelids are droopy." Roy said as if they stood out from the rest of Ed's face like a duck among swans. "You're tired."

"So?! Maybe I've just been up researching late at night!"

"Nope." Roy said simply. "You can't sleep without it. It's like a lullaby for you, isn't it? Little Edo can't sleep without his Roy under the covers with him."

"Who are you calling little?!" Edward cried. "And I just so happened to see your soiled-cloth filled waste basket on the way in! It seems pretty odd that you'd toss out several of my gloves! They don't measure up to the real thing, do they?" He leaned even closer to Roy. "I bet no one wants to touch those now."

"Maybe it was someone else." Roy replied, leaning forward in his chair a bit. "You're pretty popular around here you know."

"Yes, but no one would go that far except for a sex-deprived bastard like you!" Edward shot back in a low voice.

"Don't be stupid! At least I can sleep at night. I don't know how long someone can go without sleep!" Roy hissed back. "If you can't sleep without it that means it's a necessity for you. You couldn't possibly live a healthy life like this."

"Bastard Colonel!"

"Fullmetal nuisance!"

Then their lips collided in a heated kiss; their tongues continuing the argument in their mouths, fingers grabbing at hair and hands ripping at clothes. Edward climbed over the desk separating them and threw himself on Roy who pushed him back up and slammed Ed down on the desk.

"I guess…" Edward panted out.

"We both lost." Roy finished, closing the gap between their lips ensuring the conversation's end.

Both Roy and Edward stuck to their promises. Roy had four piles of paperwork, three of which extra, the next day. But he had something hiding under his desk to help pass the time faster. And that something – or rather someone – had to be an obedient dog. The purpose was to make paperwork a bit more pleasurable, but if anything it was a huge distraction.

Ah-haha...too much doujinshi for me. But then again...you can never have enough of that can you? Well I hope you enjoyed this dirty little oneshot! Reviews are appreciated!