Essence Reawakened

By: GypsyDruid & IceFlame55

Disclaimers:

I own nothing and no one. Therefore, no profit has been or will ever be made from this story. 'Nuff said.

Spoilers: None. Veers away from canon at Becoming Part 2

Rated: NC-17

Pairings: Multiple Pairings, Pairings w/ Multiple Partners

Anything I've missed (disclaimer related) I can't think of it at the moment, but it still applies.

A/N: Speech patterns 'mental speech'(italics), thoughts (italics w/o ' '), 'Lillith speaking' (bold)

Summary: The ensouling spell fails. Buffy manages to close Acathla, but not before she's pulled in with Angelus. How high a price is she willing to pay, not only to survive, but to get back home.

Prologue

Angel's eyes flashed as his soul flooded him once again. Angelus fought it with all of his strength.

"God, damn it, NO!" He growled. "I won't be trapped again!"

Buffy watched in shock, her sword still poised at his neck. Willow tried the curse, she realized, then realized something else. Xander lied to me. He had to have known. She couldn't believe that Xander would lie about something like this. Behind him, she could see the statue's mouth open further and the portal form.

"NO!!" He screamed, and his eyes flashed again as he managed to resist the spell. His vamped out momentarily, then used her distraction to shove the sword away and scoop up his own. She reacted swiftly, however, going with the motion and before he could do anything else, she thrust her sword deep into his chest. He gasped in surprise, then flashed her a cruel grin, only for it to fall away in shock when tendrils of the portal began to wrap around him. Belatedly, he realized that she was using him to close the portal he had taken great pains to open. He felt it dragging him in, and decided that he wasn't going alone. Before Buffy could release the sword, his hand closed over hers, and held on tight, dragging her along with him.

"If I'm going, baby, then so are you."

Frantically, Buffy fought to break his grip as the tendrils traveled down his arm to swirl around hers. As she struggled, the tendrils moved up her arms to cover her shoulders and, in a flash of light, she was yanked forward.

In the nearby window, a pale, horrified Xander watched as they both vanished and the statue became dormant once more.

Buffy's Slayer instincts kicked in the moment her body hit solid ground, rolling back to her feet and rising in a ready position with her sword clutched firmly in her hands. Her senses were going haywire, but thankfully some part of her remained focused on the most pertinent threat as she instinctively blocked a hard blow aimed at her head. She focused on the fight, putting aside her concerns of where she was and why her senses were wigging, and battled Angelus until the unfamiliar terrain caught up with him and he stumbled on a rock of some kind. It was the opening that Buffy needed and, darting in quickly, she sliced open the length of his arm, causing him to drop his sword before looking him dead in the eye.

"Goodbye Angel." She said softly and, with a hard upward swing, she beheaded him, turning away as his head fell from his body and both turned to dust.

She stood with her eyes closed as she waited for the ache in her heart to subside. She had done it. She had killed the love of her life. She was about to indulge in a well-deserved cry when a sound caught her ears. Opening her eyes, she finally took a good look around, and nearly choked. Everywhere she looked, there were demons. Lots and lots of demons. Deciding discretion was better part of valor, she turned and took off in the opposite direction, but didn't get far before she saw even more demons in that direction. For the next several months, she ran and fought, eating and drinking what she could find and sleeping when she could find a safe out of the way spot. During those precious moment of rest, she began to suffer from nightmares where she was all powerful and demons and humans cowered at her feet.

'We cannot continue this way.' A voice stated.

"Who's there?" Buffy asked. "Where is this?

'I am Lillith.' A figure stepped from Buffy and turned to face her. It was a shadowy, indistinctive form about her size. 'I was the one whose essence was stolen and used to create the first of your kind.'

"What did you mean, we can't continue?" Buffy asked as she absorbed the impact of her revelation.

'You grow weary in body and mind.' Lillith pointed out. 'You hunger and you thirst. Your human body is frail and not meant for this place, even with all of your stolen powers.'

"That's not exactly something I can change." Buffy stated, too tired for false bravado or even a witty quip.

'Give yourself over to me.' Lillith said. 'This place has replenished my strength, which has enabled me to speak to you in this way, and you are a worthy avatar since my own body has been long destroyed.' Her voice turned seductive. 'Give yourself to me and I will strengthen your shell and fill it with power beyond their imagination.'

"In return for what?" Buffy demanded. "I'm not going to just hand over my body. I'm blonde, not stupid. If I do this, you're not going to just back off when we get back home. I'm not going to let you destroy or corrupt my soul just to get home again."

Lillith laughed. 'Very good, my Childe. Such wary caution is wise. I could simply take your body. I now have the power needed. Yet I suspect that you will not submit quietly, and conflict between us will get us killed. A bargain, perhaps?'

"What kind of bargain?" Buffy asked suspiciously.

'We merge. I will strengthen your shell and give you the power to survive, but you will retain your soul. In essence, we will share this body.' Lillith offered. 'I cannot promise not to influence your decisions, because if you accept this, I will become a part of you, with as much of an opinion on your choices as your own conscience, but I will not purposely or intentionally corrupt your soul.'

A loud noise woke Buffy from the dream, and she had just enough time to jump to her feet and grab her sword before a large, dark red demon burst into her hiding spot. It took her almost fifteen minutes to kill the demon, where normal it would have barely taken her five. She knew that what 'Lillith' said was true. She was getting weaker. There wasn't enough food here that was edible to humans, since this wasn't a dimension meant for humans. The demons here were also stronger and faster than those back home. If she didn't do something soon, either find a way back or give in and accept Lillith's offer, she was going to die.

They bargained, in her dreams, for the conditions of their deal for several sporadic nights whenever Buffy felt safe enough to try to rest. The dreams were coming more frequently, and were really freaking her out, until Lillith told her that they were memories of her reign before her servants and slaves turned on her and her mate. Buffy realized that soon Lillith wouldn't have to bargain. If she continued to get stronger, then she might, at some point, be able to simply destroy Buffy's soul and take over completely.

"I agree to the terms." Buffy finally said one night soon after. "Let's do this."