DAY 1:

Throughout the mansion, various voices were all calling out in unison one word:

"BOBBY!!!!"

"Heh heh heh," Bobby "The Iceman" Drake snickered in his room, wondering what each of them had found. Was it the glue in Rogue's shoes? The handy-dandy bottle of Rogaine on the Professor's desk (artfully tied with a big red bow and a lovely love letter from "Jean")? Or had it been . . .

Beast stormed in the Iceman's room. "Honestly, Bobby, sometimes you just go too far!"

Yes, yes it had been the phosphoric acid replaced with Snapple. Bobby tried to hide a grin.

Jubilee, upon hearing Beast's not-so-quiet entrance into Bobby's room, ran to the door. "What is going on in here?!"

"Our precious Bobby has hidden my phosphoric acid and replaced it with some sort of vile, unnatural . . . "

"Snapple," Bobby smiled.

"I rest my case."

"Wait . . . if the Snapple was the phosphoric acid, then the actual Snapple container has . . . Gotta go!" Bobby leapt off the bed and skidded down the hall. "Storm! Wait!" He created an ice slide and slid through the mansion in hot persuit of the Weather Witch.

***

DAY 2:

Meeting in my office. Immediately!>> Professor Xavier's telepathic voice came booming into the X-Men's minds.

"Quick, team! Suit up! The Professor needs us!" Scott Summers called to the X-Men.

They all responded, running to their suits. Bobby iced up quickly and ran to the office, but not before icing the doorknob for a cold little treat for Scott who would surely come next. As Iceman sat down, he heard a cry of surprise from Scott.

Scott, after ripping his hand away from the knob, let an optic blast shoot from his visor to break the ice away. The Professor glared at Bobby.

"Cyclops? Jean?" the Professor asked, staring at the X-Men. "Why are you in uniform?"

Scott shrugged. "Force of habit. Plus, in my opinion, I look good in spandex."

The X-Men, who had all shown up by this time, cringed and made a face. Jean put her hand on Scott's arm and shook her head. Scott looked at Jean and then at the Professor, confused and upset. He lowered his head, ashamed.

"By the way, Chuck," Wolverine asked, "why do you dress us up in spandex?"

The Professor smiled and said casually, "I have my reasons."

Jean telekinetically restrained Logan from going on a berserker rage on the Professor, who continued, leaning back and crossing his arms. "This is about Bobby." He turned to Bobby, who was busy freezing one of the Professor's pencils. Professor Xavier snatched it away and Bobby looked up at him with wide eyes. "Bobby, you need to see a doctor."

Hank raised his eybrows in protest. "But - "

"Who's not Hank. This requires outside assistance. Bobby," Xavier said, turning to Bobby and leaning forward, "we believe you have A.D.D."

"What!? That's crazy! I don't have A.D. what's-it!"

"A.D.D."

"What? Yeah, whatever."

"I see what you mean," Jubilee said.

"Jubilee, don't get me started on you!"

Jubilee did "shifty-eyes".

Meanwhile, Bobby Drake had gotten up and was leaving the room.

"Bobby! Where are you going?!"

Iceman shrugged. "I got bored." He looked around at everyone staring at him. "Alright, alright, I'll go," he relented.

DAY 3:

The next afternoon, the X-Men assembled in the waiting room of a local doctor's office. A five-year-old stood in front of Wolverine, smiling. Wolverine was picking his teeth wih an adamantium claw. He looked down at the little boy. "What're you lookin' at, kid?" he said gruffly.

The little boy pointed to Wolverine's hair and claw. "You're pointy."

"'Ro, you wanna change seats?"

"No. I'm alright."

The five-year-old had proceeded to climb up onto the chair next to Wolverine and was reaching for the two points. Logan picked up the boy and held him at arm's length. "Ro, please."

"I'm quite fine here, Logan," she said, flipping a page in her magazine and looking over at Logan wickedly.

"Ro, I'm serious. I'm this close to chuckin' this kid at the cajun!"

"Leave Gambit outta dis!"

"Drake, Robert."

"Oh, thank God!" Rogue said with exasperation. Logan dropped the kid on the chair and stood up. A little girl began giggling and pointing at Wolverine.

"Pointy hair! Pointy hair! Pointy hair!" she sang. The little boy started.

"Pointy! Pointy! Pointy!"

Wolverine cringed and popped his claws. The children gasped and shrank back in horror. Logan retracted them and continued walking.

"Wait! Has anyone seen Bobby? Ah coulda sworn Ah saw him . . . "

Just then, Bobby appeared in a doctor's uniform.

"Bobby - !"

"Doctor Drake. Doctor Drake. You're wanted in the gynecology department.Doctor Drake, please report to the gynecology department," a voice said over the P.A. system.

Bobby's eyes lit up and he snapped on some rubber gloves.

"Bobby, you're not a doctor!" Jean cried.

Bobby Drake looked at her sadly. "Y'know, that's the exact same attitude that nearly kept me from following me dream?" He smiled again. "Now if you excuse me, I have to go to the gynecology department, like the nice, scary voice said."

"Oh, no you don't!" Jean telekinetically stopped him and "carried" him to the doctor.

"I'm sorry, but there are too many of you. I would like only Mr. Drake to come with me."

"Believe me," Jean Grey said, pushing a stray wisp of red hair from her face, "you will need my help."

The doctor turned from Jean to Bobby, frantically kicking in the air.

"Alrighty then," she said casually. "Come with me."

Jean followed, Bobby floating helplessly behind her.

Not five minutes later, the doctor reappeared, her hair in disarray and her clipboard falling apart. Jean was still cool and confident, despite exasperation marking her face. Bobby was standing behind her.

Jubilee opened her mouth to say something but the doctor interrupted her. "Yes, yes. It seems that he has a very strange, severe, and acute form of A.D.D."

"But you were only in there five minutes! Like, how do you know?"

"Believe me, five minutes was enough."

Bobby began to drool slightly and swayed a bit. Jean turned around and held him up telekinetically.

"I have a question: why is de Iceman drooling?" Gambit asked.

The doctor looked at Bobby as if to confirm to herself that he was indeed drooling. He was. She turned back around and brushed a lock of dark brown hair behind her ear. "We had to sedate him. I must have given him too much."

Cyclops stood up. "What is it he has, exactly?"

"Gee, now that's the funny thing: we don't know. We just now discovered it . . . in him. We can either call it severely acute A.D.D. or, my personal favorite, R.D.S."

"What's that?" Scott asked.

"Well, since A.D.D. is Attention Deficit Disorder, R.D.S. would be Robert Drake Syndrome."

Cyclops frowned. "We'll think about it," he said and led Bobby away.

"Oh! And before you go, I'd like to give you this prescription. You can pick up the drugs downstairs. It's very strong, but in the same classes as Retalin and Speed."

"Speed," Jubilee snorted [no pun intended]. "That's the last thing Bobby needs!"

"You'd think so, but the Retalin helps him become more focused and he will be able to control himself."

"And, to make it easier for him to take it, they're in the shape of Flintstone's characters!" The pudgy doctor opened the bottle and pulled out a purple, grape-flavored Dino. "O-oh, Dino. You're so clever," she smiled.

"Uh, Ah hate to interrupt, but it looks like Bobby's startin' ta wake up. And he sees a squirrel. We better go."