Disclaimer: I own nothing except the plot.

Warnings: Read in previous chapters.

A/N: I was finally enlighten with a way of how to write this chapter. So here you go. Enjoy!

Amid Falsity and Truth

Chapter 8:

Guilt me into Truth

Born in the center of your diaphragm, right below your sternum, it buries its roots within your stomach growing down far afield your legs and flourishing into your heart until the caress of its blossom drives you insane.

There's a name for this feeling…this sensation that –depending on your strength of mind– can become unbearable.

Guilt.

Some people, who have no conscience or care too little, have slight to no sense of it. But others, like Lily Truscott, are too aware. Why, how can you not comprehend it from start to end when you have been going through its effects for almost a month?

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Vans clad feet dragged themselves into the classroom only stopping before a chair where their owner dropped her body.

"What's up Lil?" A familiar masculine voice says from her right. At turning she finds Oliver, curiosity filling his eyes. For a second, she considered telling him everything from the start; maybe it would appease her mind, or at the least provide her with useful advice. But another second gave her to reason; the information was too much to give at the moment, probably too disproportioned for him to manage as well.

"Nothing, just mornings, you know how they affect me." She opted to answer instead, to what he chuckled and nodded in understanding.

He stopped as another question popped into his mind. "Hey where's Miley? Don't you guys always walk together to school?"

"We do and we did. But I lost her." Lily answered.

"Again?" The boy asked, amazed by the information.

Lily nodded as if the lost of her friend was a normal thing. After all, it was. It had been happening for almost a month now. The brunette was just in her own world three quarters of the time. At first Lily hadn't noticed, because she too had been lost in some distant planet after her confession to her internet girlfriend, but as the elation wore off been replaced by shame she came back down to Earth. From what Oliver had told her, Miley was been constantly lost – like lily had – for almost a week now, and it was starting to annoy him. But who wouldn't? Miley barely talked during lunch, it was hard to get her attention and when walking she would end up going some other different direction from theirs getting literally lost.

Thus, it was quite obvious, if not expected, to see Oliver beginning to worry. However, Lily was not overly concern. She could see that Miley was happily lost, and it probably had something to do with her cyber boyfriend. So as long as she was content, there was nothing to worry about.

"Shouldn't we go look for her?" Oliver wondered. The class was about to start after all.

"Nah." Lily shrugged. Miley was having a joyful moment, she was not autistic. She would get to the class a few seconds before it started, like always.

Reluctantly, Oliver let the subject drop and righted himself in his chair as the teacher, Mr. Corelli, entered the classroom and moved to the front of the room.

And right after him Miley walked in, she sat in front of Lily with that never-leaving smile and her books in her arms. The blond rolled her eyes, and huffed, amused.

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"So how was school Lily?" Heather asked, leaning over the table to take some macaroni and cheese with a big metal spoon, she then poured it into Lily's plate.

"It was okay, like every day." Lily answered, wondering why parents always had to ask the same unchanging question about school. Miley was probably going through this torture right now too.

"Well, that's boring." The older blond said with a smile, helping herself to macaroni now.

"Tell me about it." She replied, driving a spoon of her food into her mouth.

"Do you have homework?"

"To my torture, yes." She grunted.

"Awww, well don't worry sweetheart, once you have grown up you will only have a minimum of eight hours of streetwork, emphasis on minimum." Heather said sweetly, as if she was really trying to make her daughter feel better.

"Funny." Lily stated dryly, knowing the truth of the woman's words. Her mother laughed.

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If you have ever been stuck in some kind of situation that you can't wait to get out of, but at the same time you don't want it to end because of what would be closer to occur aftewards, then you know how Lily has felt during this whole day.

Now add to this the desire to do something, because you want or you have to, but not having the concentration to complete even half of it and you will know how the blond skater is feeling in this exact moment as she lays on her bed face down with her math book and notebook open before her trying to complete her math homework.

Is funny, because in any other occasion she would have left this for later, or most probably, tomorrow morning, between classes or during lunch right before her class started where she would probably copy from Oliver or some other classmate; just like Miley. Yet, today she did could not muster the strength, or confidence, to close her books and direct herself to her computer. It was frustrating, but not in the usually maddening way people get frustrated. It was more in a painful manner.

She sighed, knowing very well that she was not going to finish her homework with her current lame focus. She might as well do what she had to do, she thought closing her books and getting off the bed, no reason to delay it any longer.

Unwillingly, she walked to the other side of her room where her desktop computer was and pulled the comfy chair that in her belief would be her only object of comfort in a few hours. Lily sat down and pulled herself towards the computer before turning it on. Minutes later it was completely uploaded.

There was the long and rectangular box of Yahoo with the little "Sigh in" button waiting for her, her e-mail and password always remembered. She located the cursor upon it and for a while waited for it to press itself, but coming to the evident conclusion that it wouldn't happen, pressed it without giving it a second thought; no space for regret, she thought.

She had just layed her eyes in the little square that was her girlfriend's icon and e-mail when a dialog box popped up in her screen.

Rockstar4ever: Hey! There you are! I thought you weren't going to appear tonight. Are you okay?
UltimateSkater: Um, yeah, I'm fine, you?

Rockstar4ever: I'm alright. Better now that you are here. :)
UltimateSkater: Hehe.

Lily could only laugh at her girlfriend's words, a painful laugh that barely left her chest. The cuteness was so like her. She would miss it if things went wrong. Which she was almost sure they would. Then, knowing the culmination of this tale, would she dare persist with her decision?

Yes, yes she would. Too much time had passed, she knew now that she should have never lied. Even if her intentions were never corrupted, she only wanted to obtain some experience at flirting with girls. Hopefully it would prove useful in her real life once she was older or truly interested in someone.

But things never happen as planned, an immense un-planned affection occurred, and too profound it was, that she could no longer go on deceiving her lover. What kind of love would be base on falsehood?

Rockstar4ever: So what's up?

This was it then, Lily thought gulping, and thanking God that at least she did not have to do this in person for the dryness in her throat would never let her utter a word and the upcoming moist of her yes would give the bad news away.

UltimateSkater: Actually, I think we need to talk about something.

She wrote, not really thinking anymore. The faster the better, like she had thought: no space for regret.

Rockstar4ever: Um, okay, what is it about then?
UltimateSkater: I have something to tell you that might be shocking to you.

Rockstar4ever: Shocking?
UltimateSkater: Yes. Um…I have been lying to you about something, but before you jump to conclusions let me tell you that no, I have NEVER cheated on you. Is something else, something about me.

Rockstar4ever: Okay. Tell me then.
UltimateSkater: Right, but before I tell you, I want you to always remember that I love you, like I have never loved anyone, and I don't know how it's possible to love someone who I have barely seen so much, but I do.

Rockstar4ever: I love you too. :)
UltimateSkater: Hopefully you will still love me enough to stay with me after this.

Rockstar4ever: I love you a lot Louis. So just tell me what it is 'cause' you are starting to scare me a bit.
UltimateSkater: Don't worry I'm not some mafia guy or anything like that, hehe.

Rockstar4ever: Then what's the big lie about then?
UltimateSkater: I'm, somewhat different than what I have been leading you to believe.

Rockstar4ever: So you are…ten, twenty years older than me?
UltimateSkater: No, that's not it. I'm your age, seventeen.

Rockstar4ever: Then?
UltimateSkater: Um, I am, I'm a girl.

Rockstar4ever: What!?

There it was, the exact reaction she was expecting. A knot gave rise in her throat, and she blinked to extinguish the tears that were appearing by the inevitable.

Rockstar4ever: This is a joke right?
UltimateSkater: No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before.

Rockstar4ever: You are sorry!?
UltimateSkater: Yes, look, at first I didn't think we would get this serious. But we did and I didn't know how to tell you.

Rockstar4ever: So you thought it was okay to keep with this farce!?
UltimateSkater: It was not a farce! I love you, everything you know about me is real. My love for you is real I'm just, not a boy, that's the only lie here! I'm sorry I lied, but please, forgive me.

Rockstar4ever: You want me to forgive you? You lied to me since the fucking beginning. I've had an unknown lying girl for my boyfriend for almost a month! And you want me to forgive you and go on as if it was nothing? Fuck no!
UltimateSkater: I'm not unknown. You know me; I only lied about my gender!

Rockstar4ever: No, I don't know you, at all.

And right before Lily could write anything else Rockstar4ever signed out, leaving only harsh words and a lonely, heart broken Lily behind.

To be continued…

A/N: Sorry if this chapter is too short and…if it isn't too good. I'm sure I could have done better with Lily's thoughts and emotions. Sorry T-T

Yet, I hope you enjoyed it!

Reviews as well as questions are always welcome!