Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.


Konoha News Journal

Section 6:
Life & Love

Column 1:

The Love Doctor
Sakura Haruno

Believing In Love

Have you ever wondered what love is? Why would there be such a thing as love? Why does love always cause sadness and terror? Yes, all you people who doubt love and the powers of it are totally understandable. Sometimes love can be so hard to find, but that's only because you're in the dark.

To find love, to understand it, you must be willing to accept it. You must be willing to take the love you are offered when the time comes, for it could be your only time to receive such a gift.

Yes, love is a gift. A present given to others when they are sad and lonely. This gift doesn't come like others, wrapped in cheesy, colorful paper, having a bow as well as a card saying who it's from and who it's to. No, love is the kind of gift that is small and hinted. It doesn't have a card; it has signs.

These signs can be anywhere. They can be someone glancing at you for longer then they are supposed to, or even gossip. Yes, gossip, as untrue or fabricated as it is, is extremely useful with these signs, for it gets the news around.

When you find this love – and believe me, soon enough, you'll find it – you have to guard it with all your might. Yes, you've just given your heart away to the person you love, but you have someone else's as well – and that is much more valuable than yours.

For all who don't believe in the marvelous thing called love, just wait till it comes to you, and then you'll see how wonderful it is.

Soon enough you'll find yourself thinking about how you ever lived without it.


The Deceptive Cynic

Chapter One:
Mr. Right

"God, I can't believe how amazing this stuff sells." My editor commented while probably reading some bills he received or something.

"Yeah," I drawled lazily since I really wanted to get out of this stupid office and go home, throw off these stupid heels and go out with Ino or something. Friday's are the worst of them all.

"Seriously, you have no idea how many girls will send in fan-mail to our newspaper saying how much your advice helped them and how inspiring they think you are. How do you do it?"

"Again I say, for what, the thousandth time, I really don't know Kakashi." The grey-haired man's eye crinkled as he – so I imagined because of that mask – gave me an inquisitive look.

"Well, you have some astonishing talent. And I'm pretty sure you've never been in a serious relationship – you have worked here for three years now – so it's incredible that you can write about love and stuff."

"How do you know that I've never been in a relationship?" Now I was getting defensive – obviously. I mean, I could have a relationship! Do I really seem that anti-social to the opposite sex? I mean, yeah, I reject all guys that make moves and stuff, but who could blame me?

"Well, I didn't mean to offend you or anything. I was just saying, you're a very cynical person." Kakashi explained.

"I'm cynical?"

"Yeah, you know, not believing something unless you have solid proof. You don't believe in love, which makes it even crazier that you could write this."

"All this crap that saps believe in is nothing but extending your imagination to the point that it's sickening, then writing painstakingly terrible shit about love-y dove-y things that make love-sick puppies feel all warm and fuzzy inside."

"And you're not one of those love-sick saps?"

"Of course not. Love is stupid."

"Stupid?"

"Yeah. It's stupid to wait around for some knight in shining armor to come because when he does, you just find out that he's some loser in tin foil."

"You know Sakura, I really don't understand you, like, whatsoever, but I've gotta say, hiring you was the best thing I ever did." Psh, of course it was.

"Is that why you've asked me to come into your office on this glorious Friday that I should be spending on my own personal leisure time right about now?" Yeah, I wasn't a Friday person. Heck, I wasn't an any-day-of-the-week-that-I-have-to-work person.

"No, I actually just wanted to congratulate you on being an amazing writer and give you this bonus." My eyes lit up as I saw the yellow/orange/weird colored folder in Kakashi's hand. I always knew that I'd love this job when I got out of college!

"Ah! Thank you!" I cheered while clicking my feet together in excitement. I have some strange mood swings, but seriously now, two words.

Extra. Money.

Nuff said.

"Oh, you do have to go to a wedding tomorrow."

"Ugh, who this time?"

"A couple named Suigetsu and Karin. Here's all the information and I expect a full article that you'll fax to me by Sunday." I sighed, but took the manila folder in his extended hand.

"Yeah, yeah."

"You have a good weekend too."

Stupid Kakashi reminding me about my stupid job that also involves me spending time at other peoples weddings while recording their oh-so-wondrous love story full of hot passion and mystery.

Excuse me while I shoot myself.


"Another wedding? What's this one about?" Ino asked while leaning back on the orange neon couch and flipping her golden locks.

"A couple with this girl who has like, orange-y red hair and a guy and they used to know each other as kids and were best friends. He confessed his undying love to her in front of everyone at graduation and now they're getting married so they can complete the circle of their love." I rolled my eyes while drawing my hands in a circle in the air at the words.

"Aw! That sounds so cute! Why can't a guy do that to me?" Ino asked while downing the rest of her martini and leaning her head back.

"Just go ask Kiba. I'm sure he'd do it for you." Ino's eyes became slightly glassy at my comment, and I'm pretty sure she only drank one of those alcoholic beverages. Although, I did get to this bar/club-thingy late.

"H-He, he broke up with me."

"Good."

"What?" Ino spat incredulously, real tears falling now.

"What what?"

"How could you just say 'good' when my boyfriend of two months – yeah, two months – broke up with me?"

"Because you're a beautiful girl who is perfectly fine without that dirt bag. We're women and we don't need stupid men telling us what we should and shouldn't do."

"I need a man, okay?" Seriously, why do girls need guys? We are fine on our own and we don't need some guy coming to save us.

"Ugh. What happened? Did you get too serious?"

"What do you mean by too serious?"

"Were you moving to fast?"

"How would I?"

"Did you mention marriage?"

"Um, maybe. But only like once or twice. And I said I picked out our wedding song, if – did you hear that if – we were to get married. Why would that matter?" Girls like Ino are so naive. They can't see what's right in front of them.

"By mentioning the future, guys get scared and back out. They think about the present and don't care. That's why guys are so annoying."

"Are you gay?" I stared, my mouth agape, at my best friend. Me? A lesbo. Ugh, no.

"What?"

"Well, you hate guys and stuff, so–"

"I don't hate guys. I just think they're annoying and undeserving of such creatures such as us females."

"So, what if there was this amazingly awesome guy, like, he was sweet and kind and caring and was incredibly good-looking and had a perfect smile and perfect hair and liked all the things you liked and bought you flowers and complimented you and was just so incredibly perfect it was unbelievable, oh, and he so had the hots for you and was in love with you and he asked you out."

"There's no such guy."

"That's not true! There's a Mr. Perfect out there!" Wow, I hang out with this blonde bimbo why…?

"There's no such thing as Mr. Perfect. Just a Mr. Right."

"Mr. Right?"

"Yeah, he isn't perfect, but that's okay, because no one really wants perfect. Perfect is boring. Mr. Right would be something unexpected, but incredibly you. He would be what's true for you. He'd be what you need."

"See! Ha! Right there!"

"What?"

"I've always said that you're a closet romantic, and right there! That was my proof! You just went all sappy!"

"I so did not! I was just voicing my opinions over yours."

"Ugh, you're so hard to make someone agree with you it's crazy." I just rolled my eyes at her comment and took another swig of my beer. I never really got why we did go out 'clubbing' as she called it. Ino is always all, 'we're two 23 year old girls who need to live life and experience all of its perks.' What the hell are the perks of this bar when everyone gets drunk and nasty guys hit on you?

"Whatever you say Ino…"

"Oh. My. God."

"What?"

"Look at that hunk over there!" She pointed her perfectly tanned finger over to a man standing in the corner near a brick wall with a blonde. The guy Ino was pointing to had black hair and mysterious, onyx eyes. He had a scowl on his face and gave off an aura that definitely should make people leave him alone. Yeah, that didn't work with all the girls surrounding him.

Oh, he just smirked. Probably something the blonde next to him said. He doesn't look like the laughing kind of guy.

"He's okay." I said while making a half/half motion with my hand. But seriously, who am I kidding. He is pretty good-looking. There are only two people in the whole world that I have ever considered gorgeous beyond belief and that would have to be Johnny Depp and that guy from American Idol, Michael Johns. This guy is no Captain Jack Sparrow, I'll tell ya.

"Okay? Okay? No, Dane Cook is okay. That is a masterpiece."

"Guys aren't some piece of art, Ino. They're human beings."

"Weren't you just calling them annoying?"

"How would you like being called an artwork?"

"I'd love it! And that's only because I am one! I actually try looking wonderful. As apposed to you who just goes around being all…you."

"What I wear is casual and necessary." I looked down at my attire to see dark blue jeans, a black satin-like blouse and my black flats. Usually, I'd be wielding heels, but not tonight since I just spent like, my whole week in those stupid shoes.

"It's just so…plain. Why don't you wear something extravagant? Something extraordinary."

"Oh, I'll be wearing extraordinary tomorrow. And speaking of that wondrous wedding tomorrow, can I borrow another one of your dresses?"

"God, you really need to go and buy some good clothes. Half your job involves going to weddings and you don't own any good party clothes. You're officially the worst 23-year-old woman I've ever met."

"And you're the craziest."

"I love you too." I rolled my eyes and got up from the couch.

"I'm getting a refill. You need one?" She just shook her head so I grabbed her martini glass and headed toward the bar – a place I knew too well.

I headed through a few mobs of people and finally got up to the bartender.

"Hey. One beer and an apple martini please." The guy nodded and began his work.

"Why don't I just pick that up for you darling?" Darling? Darling? Yeah, I hate clubs/bars.

I turned to see a guy who looked in his twenties and a defiant five o'clock shadow. Ew, and his breath reeked of alcohol.

"Um, no." He just pouted and I was pretty sure he was about to walk away.

"You sure baby?"

"Um, yeah, sugar."

"Sugar? Hey, I kinda like that sweetums."

"Yeah, really, you need to go." He did that weird pout thing again – that only looks good on girls, seriously – and then walked away.

"What is with guys thinking that they can just go up to girls and make moves on them? Don't they realize how uninterested we are?" I asked the bar tender in front of me, since I was kind of familiar with him, but more to myself.

"I know what you mean." Came a deep voice from next to me. I turned to see Ino's hunk from before. Yeah; the tall, dark, and handsome one.

"Thank you! Finally there are freakin' sane people in this universe." He just smirked that oh-so-sexy smirk that he did before when his friend said something funny.

"Aa."

"But I'm sure there are girls for you, you know, with the whole hitting on thing. 'Cause it would be kinda awkward if guys it on you, and you know," I stopped myself from talking because, oh my god, I'm rambling. Yeah, so it's not a monumentally important thing to you, but it is rather crucial to me. I never ramble. As in, not one incoherent, odd thing exits my mouth without me noticing it.

I only rambled once when – well, let's not mention the ex here. Because – as Ino always says – never bring him up unless it's necessary.
But anyways, I never ramble unless I'm remotely – in some weird, alternate universe or something – interested in a male. Which is bad. Yeah, as you've just read, I don't magically fall for men like that – especially ones that I've just met in a bar while ordering a beer and an apple martini as a guy hits on me. That just doesn't happen.

"Sorry, wow, I hate rambling." I informed once I noticed the weird look on no-name's face.

"So I've noticed."

"I'm leaving now." He just smirked as I turned away.

"Well, it was nice rambling with you." My head crooked back as I looked at him, giving him an annoyed stare. He just smirked wider as I instantly turned back and practically stormed back to my nice neon couch with my best friend.

"Whoa, what's your problem?" Ino questioned as I practically smashed down onto the couch.

"Nothing." I answered gruffly. Why is this stupid guy that I just met getting me all shook up and bothered? It's not like I care about him or anything.

"Well where are the drinks?" I looked down at my empty hands to see that there – no flippin' way – empty.

"Shit, I forgot them. Hold on, I'll go up there and–"

"A beer and an apple martini for the ladies." A waitress said while putting said drinks down on the glass table in front of us. I gave an inquisitive look to the brown-haired woman.

"I-I, I didn't order these." I explained.

"There from that man, Uchiha, over there." She pointed to the same stud muffin I was just talking to over at the bar. Ino's mouth flung open as she gasped.

"Ah, thank you." I said to the waitress as she left. I then turned to this alleged 'Uchiha' and saw that he was smirking again…at me.

"Oh. My. God. Look who got the attention of the hunk!" She cheered as I hung my head down because, oh my god, I was blushing. I don't blush, okay! Nope. Never. Ever. This doesn't happen. At all.

"Shut up. I was just talking to him at the bar and stuff."

"You talked to him?"

"Yeah, whatever. It doesn't matter, you know, at all."

"Ugh, you're so impossible." I just rolled my eyes and grabbed my beer while stealing a quick glance at 'Uchiha'.

He wasn't looking at me – thank god – but for some totally weird, odd, unfathomable reason, I wanted him to be.


So wow, yeah, another story! Chica Chica yeah!

I kinda like the idea of it. It's like 27 Dresses/Hitch all mixed in one! And I thought it was a cool title and stuff, plus I'm writing 'My Very Own Fairytale' which is like, the total opposite of this.

I'm going to do an article in the beginning for each chapter and stuff, since well, yeah. And we'll being seeing more of Sasuke…next chapter…Team Hebi…hint-hint.

If you feel the need to review this story and say how much you loved/hated it or just tell me about your life, or something like that, then just go and click that little purple button (it's purple, not light-blue-ish-gray!) and review please!