It's in the Stars
Disclaimer: I don't own Lost Odyssey or any of it's characters and I'm making no profit from the game or this fanfiction.
I think Ming and Jansen's relationship is really sweet, I hope you enjoy this
It's in the Stars
"Wow…"
Ming's eyes opened slowly, fixing on the ceiling as she listening to Jansen muttering in his sleep. For the past few weeks she'd had difficulty in getting to sleep, or staying there if she managed it, so she'd become used to spending her nights like this. As always Jansen was dead to the world, curled up on his side with a hand covering his eyes.
"What a woman…"
She couldn't help but smile… it was just like him to be thinking about some attractive woman, even subconsciously. Out of all the things he liked in the world, there was no denying that Jansen's favourite subject was women. Yet technically he'd settled down a lot since meeting her… ever since he first laid eyes on her, the thousand year old Queen of Numara, he'd stopped looking at other women like that. Well… not entirely, but close enough.
I wonder if I'm really doing him any good…
She rolled onto her side, reaching out her hand and laying it gently on his back, running her fingers between his shoulder blades. Although she had no doubt in her mind that she truly loved him, more than any man she had met in all her years, she always felt a deep sadness whenever she looked at him, something which she knew was a confusing subject for him. In honesty, Jansen wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed, but he had always had an uncanny ability of picking up on her emotions, even if he didn't always know how to respond to them.
"What did I ever do to deserve somebody like you?"
"Something terrible…"
Jansen grumbled, turning his head to look at her, his dark eyes bleary and half lidded.
Ming jumped and took in a deep breath, shocked that for once he had actually answered her question. She'd asked him every night for the past two weeks without a reply.
"I'm sorry… I didn't mean to wake you. I was just thinking aloud."
Sitting up, Jansen cast a concerned gaze her way, placing his hand on top of hers and smoothing his thumb across it.
"Is something the matter?"
Ming shook her head, lowering her gaze to the patterns on the bed sheet. Beside her the weight on the bed shifted a little as he leant over the edge, groping for his shirt and pulling it on. Really, it still felt a little strange to be sleeping in the same bed with Jansen, with naked Jansen… even after three years of marriage. Somehow it still felt odd.
"You're thinking about my clothes again aren't you?"
Ming turned to him and smiled gently, pushing his long hair away from his face. It always made her laugh when he took it out of its ponytail and simply left it sticking up at odd angles or hanging in his eyes. The cut really wasn't accommodating for his face, but it looked cute.
"I suppose I am…"
"Not what you wanted to see after all huh?"
Jansen smirked, although his voice betrayed his obvious belief in such a comment.
"No… No, of course not… it's exactly what I want to see, trust me."
He couldn't help but laugh at that, a sound she rarely heard considering he was such a light hearted person.
"I wonder…"
Silence fell on the room for a moment, covering everything like a blanket as they sat upright, together, in the middle of the night.
"Yeah… me too."
Ming looked at him curiously, consumed once more by her interest in such a mysterious man, her previous troubles falling away. She could never tell what was going through his mind, only that it was probably a little strange.
"What do you wonder about?"
Pulling back the bed covers, Jansen clambered out and went to stand by the tall window looking out over Numara, peering up at the night sky and smoothing his hair back into its usual style.
"I dunno… everything… like… those stars; do Kings really live on them? I guess if they do, that means there's one up there for me too right? And anyway, how did I ever get to be a King? King of Numara, I don't get it! And you… how did somebody like me… a rat, get a woman like you? I don't deserve anything more than those street walkers in Uhra… man… I really don't understand."
Even from far away, Ming could tell his face was getting redder and redder as he went on. It amused her that he could get himself so worked up about so many things and yet could face danger with a relative sense of calm… most times.
"And… and what's going to happen next? I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Am I meant to have a kid? I really don't think I want that… I mean, if you want to, it's okay… I'll pretty much go along with anything, as long as it doesn't get me killed… it's just… you're immortal and I'm just… not… and what the hell am I -"
"Jansen…"
"Just… I'm gonna get old… really old, and ugly… and you won't want to sleep with me anymore, then you'll probably want to lock me in a cupboard somewhere… and then I'll just die! I'll get old and die and I'll think 'gee, that was a pretty weird life!' at the end of it all… it's just, I wish…"
"That you could be immortal too?"
Ming came to stand beside him, placing her hand lightly on his shoulder. It was amazing, somebody like that, seemingly so confident, could secretly worry so much about everything. In trying to smooth away others sorrow, it seemed he'd ended up neglecting his own.
"Jansen Friedh… I didn't marry you because of your lifespan, or because I wanted anything from you… I don't want anything from you… children, money, looks… Only love… The point is, I fell in love with you regardless of our differences. It's not about the distant future."
"But I…"
"It's okay."
Ming pressed her hand to his lips, silencing him as she had done many years ago aboard The White Boa.
"It's okay to be worried, I understand… but I don't want you to change because you're perfect just as you are, a mortal man. I know it's hard, spending all of that time around immortals, you the only one that can die, feeling inadequate…but if you weren't mortal, you wouldn't be the person that you are and I… I would still be struggling through all of these years, looking for somebody."
Jansen turned away, beginning to pace the floor. The patch of carpet in that particular spot was worn from this same habit being repeated so many times.
"But don't you wish it had been somebody else? Like Kaim! Kaim is a pretty good guy right? And neither of you can die, I'm sure if you tried you could probably reel him in, I mean you could definitely take Sarah out, no contest... I mean you're a great woman… really great. You could get any guy you liked."
"I did…"
Stepping forward, Ming clutched hold of his arm, stopping him in his tracks and leaning inward, planting a soft kiss on his face and another on his lips, relishing the shocked look on his face. Even now, it was like he could never believe what was truly happening to him.
"Jansen… When I look at you, sometimes I wonder, did I do the right thing in tying down a man like you? Someone with such a free spirit… is it ever right to keep that person just for yourself? Seeing you beside me every day, it fills me with an unbelievable sense of happiness, and relief… I was searching for you; deep in my heart I always knew it. After everything we've done together and all you've done for me… it's just right that we're together, don't you think? It's like we don't really have much of a choice, it just sweeps us up and carries us along like the tide. When I look at you, a part of me feels sadness, as though I've trapped a wild animal and forced it to sit in a cage. I've questioned it a lot, whether I did the right thing in admitting my feelings for you… but I've seen enough of time to know that this is the way things are meant to be."
"Well you can't mess with the tide."
"No…" she laughed, smoothing her fingers along his jaw "nobody can…"
"But wait…"
Jansen pulled away, looking at Ming with an expression of pure bewilderment.
"What tide?"