note.

This is the rewritten and revised Chapter 1 (2015).

To clear things up:
This is AU. Sasuke returned to Konoha after killing Itachi.
All of Team 7 but Kakashi is chuunin.
Akatsuki is no longer around.
Danzou is no longer around either, it's all happy in the world of Naruto (or is it?).

Try As Me

Chapter 1

[ Seconds ]

The fact that she underestimated her target was the first thought that ran through Sakura's frustrated mind when she felt the bed sheets crumple under her.

"Enma-sama" The girl breathed out seductively, while lowering her eyelids in an innocent and playful way- the most persuading one she could muster at least. Seeing her victim smirk thinking he got her, made her feel a little better.

She pretended to moan slightly, lifting her hands up as an act for him to lift the red shirt slightly little further up her torso. She used one of the lifted hands to fumble around the shelf and turned her head the other way, her long mass blue hair from henge blocking her view of most things. But she could still feel his nose nuzzling her neck and it sent goose bumps down her arms.

The poison had already been set in the room and if the kunoichi could just feel him loosen a bit...

'Oh- It's working. Now I just have to get the information out of him before he realizes.' Sakura thought to herself, the urgency obviously present.

"Enma-sama. Where is the shipment?" Sakura cried helplessly into his ears. He chuckled in his low, husky voice. Enma was still too focused on her neck to care the least for her questions.

"What shipment?"

"But Enma-sama, you said you would take me to see it? Where is it? I can't wait any longer!" She whined, while rising her normally soprano voice into an even higher girlish pitch, imitating what reminded her of choking cat.

"I can't wait too," he said off-handily, while tugging at her skirt, Sakura never felt as grateful she had been at that moment to the fact that she had worn short leggings underneath.

"I meant the shipment, you know, of fireworks?" Whispering into his ears. She had known that they weren't fireworks, but highly dangerous explosives sent to infiltrate Konoha.

"They are just at the border of Konoha's forest…" Sakura heard him mumble before he fell slack against the hard mattress and she wrinkled her nose in disgust.

Sighing, she swiveled on the bed and lifted herself. Fixing her shirt and skirt as she realized how lucky her timing was- almost too lucky. Turning back to the bed, she held a kunai in her hand to slit his throat.

She wasn't surprised to find that his two hands still shot up to block her attack. Hissing, she focused chakra to her hands and burned his in the process.

Thanking medical jutsu practices, she moved fast- kicking the wooden bed with chakra infusement so that it cracked slightly and he fell. Pouncing on top of him she could see his shocked face. She knew why- most kunoichi sent on espionage missions were not well trained in fieldwork- physical battle was not their normal forte.

Swiftly, in one strike, she silt the false daimyo's throat.

Sakura lifted her hand she signaled for the rest of them to come down. Kakashi had been away on another solo mission, so Sai had been added to complete their four men team.

She had sensed their nervousness the first few times she was sent on these missions. But nowadays, the boys just accepted the fact that her being sent while they stayed as backup was the normal cycle. It wasn't that Sakura would rather have them stay awkward or feel weird while they looked upon her, she wasn't that weak, but the least they could do was offer her some type of compassion.

These were the missions that made her drift away from Naruto and Sasuke.

At these moments where they had to regroup again, she was always thankful for Sai's presence.

He just continued to smile no matter what. Right from the beginning. Being in Root- he had understood the kunoichi's responsibilities.

He knew that as questionable as missions may be, it was their responsibility to accomplish them for the village. This he had once explained to her, was the reason why there were no females in Root. Root was meant to do work deemed un-honorable, but the laws of villages gave missions that were unbearable enough to a selected few kunoichi. Giving them a position in Root would make no difference.

And despite him still calling her ugly. Still being blunt to her. He had the uncanny ability to make her feel more humane than Sasuke or Naruto ever could during these missions when she could not stop the pain and guilt to grow within her.

"We're going back." Sasuke announced casually, as always they didn't pay much attention to her still blue hair or her ripped clothes.

Since the pinkette had paired up Naruto and Hinata, he didn't speak to her as often, he was still happy and positive and great to talk to when she needed someone... but...he just seemed hostile towards her. As if wanting to avoid her.

Sasuke had grown colder if anything, not just with her- but Naruto also. The Uchiha seemed to shun human affection more than ever after avenging Itachi. She knew that returning to Konoha was rough enough for him, but Danzou and the other elder's deaths seemed enough to him as an atonement. She remembered him mentioning that this would be what Itachi would have wanted during his trail.

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They had gone home, leaving her alone. As they normally did. So she headed to the hospital, doing her shift. t

The normal routine.

It never occurred to her how un-enriching her life had become after her parents had passed away until tonight.

It had become a cycle.

If Sasuke's was wake-eat-train-mission-eat-train-sleep and Naruto's was wake-eat-mission-eat-train-eat-sleep, then her's was wake-eat-train-mission-hospital shift-sleep. They were rarely together. She felt lonely, but what could she do?

Sighing, she continued her way home from the hospital- it was quite a long walk considering the size of Konoha, but it never bothered her before, so why should it now?

A presence behind her disturbed her in her thoughts. A few presences. Surprising her that she hadn't noticed until they was right behind her. She had been too absorbed to herself to realize her surroundings, she was also too exhausted from a slight case of chakra depletion from her job as a medic.

"Hey look guys- looks like we have ourselves a young lady here by herself." A gruff voice mocked as wolf whistles erupted from behind her. She looked up at who she deducted as the leader of the gang. He was large, very tall and dressed in what looked like roadkill. She inwardly snickered to herself. She pretended that she didn't hear anything. Ignoring them, she walked towards her district, it was still a while to go and she wanted to go home early tonight.

"Oi. The boss is talking to you." One of his followers grabbed her by her arm and yanked her back. She snapped her arm back to her side as she flung him to the side, she didn't have enough chakra to even infuse her hands. Futhermore, her arms?

"Don't touch me." She growled.

The big one laughed again.

"Little spitfire aren't you Pinky?" She glared, spitting her his feet.

"There's much more of us than you- you're just a little girl. If you apologize now I might even let you go with just one night." She scanned her body and she tightened her coat around her in disgust as those behind him laughed in a joint chorus.

"Leave me alone." She tried to stay calm.

"Ha! That's what they all say." He licked his lips.

"I can't wait to see where else you're pink." She stifled a laugh. she had heard that line so many times already. He must have heard her though, because he walked closer to her, enraged and grabbed her arms. Trying to push her against a wall, before she kneed him down below and he howled in pain. As he bent over, she took the time to time her moves and kneed again. This time, in the middle of his torso and she smiled as he doubled over in pain. His gang didn't even follow her, feigning worry over their boss and being too scared that the same would happen to them.

Unconsciously, she had made her way to Naruto's house. Hiding her chakra presence this time round. It must have been how awake she felt, or how scared she was for another gang while she was low on chakra.

Or it could be the loneliness, nether-less, she was at his door and she didn't know what to do. After debating her decision, she decided to knock and see if he needed any healing up. Sakura knew he skipped the medical check from the mission before. But she was stopped by his voice from behind the walls.

"I really didn't like how Sakura-chan acted back there, it was way slutty! It's not like she didn't know we were watching!"

"Dobe, she wasn't slutty," Never mind the slut-shaming. Was that... Sasuke?

Please don't let it be him...

Not him. Anyone but him and it won't hurt.

I don't want to be hurt anymore.

"She's a kunoichi." He spat out the word as if it was the most disgusting thing. "Acting like a whore is part of her job. Sakura's the only one who can do it."

Sakura's mind blanked.

It was him.

She decided to leave for Ino's. She wanted someone to cry on. She's saved her tears for too long.

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"Tenten! Pass the remote over!" Sakura heard Ino shout over the loud bursts of music from the video on the television as she prepared to open the door. What was Tenten doing over at Ino's so late?

"Ask Hinata, I'm eating!" Sakura's eyebrows furrowed even further than they had before, didn't Hinata have a mission tonight? She refused her offer to have dinner with her.

"Hinata-chan, aren't you glad you came over instead of having dinner with Sakura?"

"Wh-why couldn't we i-invite her over as well?"

A moment of silence passed and Sakur grew more interested before a set of giggles filled the room. She recognized the voice as Temari's.

"Can you imagine what she would have worn to a sleepover with the type of missions she goes on? I heard she even volunteered for them!"

"We don't want to becoming tainted like her Hinata-chan!"

As her ears strained to hear more. Her heart strained a little more with it.

Everything they had said was... so blunt. So ignorant.

So uncaringly ignorant it made her wonder why she had done it all.

Didn't they know that she offered because their families had refused? Didn't they know that if she had a choice she wouldn't do it either?

She was so upset that while she was on the verge of losing herself- they had the gall to talk behind her back as if she didn't exist.

Why did I sacrifice myself for them?

They're ignorant.

They're ungrateful.

They're so-

annoying.'

(-annoying

annoying

annoying-)

"Sakura"

Her eyes widened as she awoke from her thoughts.

"You're annoying."

Sasuke's cold word embedded into her mind and she froze at how she was turning into him.

Was this how he felt against us when he found out the truth about Itachi? That we were all ignorant and that Itachi shouldn't have sacrificed himself to save us?

The thought hit her so hard she forced herself to cool her mind.

Sakura knew now.

Indeed, they didn't understand.

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She settled herself against stone bench. Closing her eyes as she rolled her head back, massaging her temple.

The other kunoichi never had to go through what haunted her nightmares. The men that promised she would never live again. The families that said they would be avenged. How she would be gutted, quartered and have her intestines sold as jewellery to those she's crossed. Curses that may indeed ring true later on.

How she had to steal sedatives from the hospital just to sleep.

A bitter laughed escaped her. She was horrible, it'd probably haunt their nightmares too.

It was the cold hard truth that the only kunoichi Konoha could afford to lose was her.

She wasn't from some prominent clan like Hyuuga Hinata.

She wasn't about to marry in a prominent clan either like the person who was going to become Hyuuga Tenten.

She didn't have some secret technique that her family had passed on from each generation down to the next like Yamanaka Ino.

She didn't have any important family members who were Kazekage like Subaku no Temari.

She was just...

"Sakura."

She turned.

"What are you doing?"

"Just taking a stroll Sasuke-kun." She didn't bother asking what he was doing, she knew Sasuke was going back to the Uchiha Compound from Naruto's place.

"Go back home, we have a mission tomorrow. Don't drag us down." She felt the fire building within her.

"And you guys didn't drag me down just now? I didn't see you doing anything!" She snapped. Immediately realizing her mistake. She covered her mouth in surprise, this was the tone she usually reserved for enemies. Not teammates.

"I- I-" she stuttered, trying to explain when he saw his eyes narrow into a glare and his mouth set into a grim line.

"You're tired Sakura. Just go back." He turned when she opened her mouth again.

"Sasuke-kun?"

He paused in his steps as he felt that something was wrong. They were on the same path from so many years back. At the same bench.

"Would you miss me if I suddenly left?"

Something was very wrong indeed.

"Sakura, it's late. Go home."

"Would you at least pretend to miss me if you found out I had died on a mission?"

His eyes widened at the nonsense the girl behind him suddenly began spouting. He could hear the choking back of her tears and he knew it was because he was Sasuke and she was Sakura. Because Sakura never wants to appear weak near him.

"Sakura." He attempted to cut her off.

"Will you miss me?"

But she had disappeared before he could even try to comfort her.

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I felt a droplet run down my face. I don't feel like crying. I didn't know I was. The familiar strain in the throat is missing, the sound of choking is unapparent. The only thing that gives it away is the wetness.

Am I really this weak? Am I really crying already?

Tears run down my cheeks. Burn my skin. It was like I could get hurt by mere tears.

I ran. Ran until my soles hurt. And cried. I cried like I never did. The more I cried, the more I ran and the more I ran, the more I cried.

As the tears left me drop by drop, it was like it was washing away all my thoughts, all my insecurities, the hidden doubts I did not want to face or believe. The more I ran, the clearer I could see what really was happening.

I don't remember the last time I cried was.

Was it when Sasuke-kun returned?

Why is it always Sasuke-kun?

But I've made up my mind. I'm going to leave Konoha.

I have to leave Konoha.

This isn't where I should be. I shouldn't need to kill myself for people that don't need or deserve me.

Not anymore.

I'm not going to let myself be second choice again. I need to put myself first now.

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At dawn, while the sun barely rose, Haruno Sakura sneaked into the Hokage Tower. She found her way up the tower, to where her teacher was sitting. Asleep and drooling on her paper work the Hokage was.

The pink-haired chuunin placed her letter onto the desk of the woman who had taught her all she knew.

She let one last tear slide off her cheek, betraying her own promise.

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I don't belong to Konohagakure any longer.