A/N: Why is it that NejiTen always seems to be the best couple for angst? Or maybe that's just my opinion... This is going to be a two-shot, so the story does not end here, but it's almost over. I listened to Silverstein while writing this (wonderful band, check them out). Let's see...can't think of anything else to say.

Disclaimer: Naruto's not mine, blahblahblah, and all that jazz.

Summary: Tenten wanted an ending she knew they couldn't have, and Neji only made it harder for her to walk away. But their first kiss marked the end of her hopes.

Unattainable

Tenten stood still, one hand resting on the rough tree trunk, the other limp at her side as she stared at the moon's silvery sheen on the pond's surface, eyes sliding out of focus as she let her thoughts still. The slightest breeze caught her bangs and blew them across her face, and the water rippled to the tune of dancing leaves. Tenten closed her eyes and took a steady breath, held it in for a bit too long, and let it out in a gratifying whoosh.

She heard the out of place crackling of twigs and leaves from behind her, but made no outward move to show that she recognized her visitor.

"Tenten, I know you know I'm here."

Her lips tweaked into the smallest of sad smiles, and she opened her eyes to stare at the once-again calm water's surface.

"Hi Neji," she said quietly, a hint of some unsure emotion hidden in her voice.

Her teammate of ten years joined her at the edge of the dark pond, making little noise as he did, and they reverted back into heavy silence. Tenten closed her eyes again so she wouldn't have to see his white shirt out of the corner of her eye, but she still felt the soft fabric brush against her bare arm every time the wind picked up. The air was calming, with a faint piney smell, but she still had trouble calming the turbulence of thoughts and emotions that were threatening to spill out.

"Did you get the invitation?" Neji's low voice cut through the silence, and Tenten felt his eyes on her. She nodded her head slowly, right hand stiffening against the rough bark of the tree.

"Have you replied to it yet?"

Tenten bit the inside of her bottom lip and shook her head, too afraid to open her eyes because she didn't want to see the way Neji's eyebrows would slant in question. She had gotten the invitation, but she hadn't opened it. She hadn't needed to in order to know what was enclosed in the gold-trimmed envelope.

Instead of the "why not?" that Tenten was expecting Neji to say next, she was instead asked, "Do you have a reply to give me?"

The way he asked it wasn't demanding or forceful, it was simply inquiring. No extra emotion given, no extra emotion needed. Strictly businesslike, just like it was supposed to be. Just like they were supposed to be. And Tenten knew that they weren't meant to be anything more than two teammates, and maybe friends, but still, it hurt. But since she was Tenten, she would pretend that everything was fine, and she would give Neji the answer she knew he was expecting.

"I'll come," she said after a long pause, and she opened her eyes to meet Neji's.

She immediately regretted it, since her heart jolted painfully against her chest and her lungs squeezed tightly and her legs suddenly felt almost nonexistent. Unlike many claimed, his eyes were not as bright or as white as the moon; Tenten knew better than that. Neji's eyes were ivory, yes, but they had an insignificant tinge of lavender that many didn't notice, and that's what made them even more beautiful than the moon.

And Tenten gave up, she gave up with her façade and she let the small crack in the wall that was dulling her emotions widen, bigger and bigger until there was a gaping hole left.

She didn't even fight the impending tears pricking at the corners of her eyes; there was no point anymore. It was dark and shadowy, and he knew anyway. He knew her secret (which wasn't a secret anymore), and he could see how much she was hurting, which is probably why he said,

"Are you sure?"

Tenten looked at the ground, and muttered in a small voice, "Unless you don't want me to." And it hurt so damn much to say those words, because she wanted him to want her, though she knew that her words didn't quite fit that context. But she was certain that Neji understood the hidden meaning behind her pitiful words.

"No, I didn't mean it that way," Neji corrected hastily, and Tenten might have once found his discomfort amusing, if she hadn't known that he was just trying to keep from hurting her any more. Because she was a friend to him. A friend.

"Oh," she said simply, dejectedly. Her vision blurred, and she blinked stubbornly.

"I want you to come, Tenten." She couldn't say no to him.

"I'll come," she whispered brokenly, swallowing back the painful lump in her throat.

She felt Neji's warm hand slip into her smaller, though equally calloused, one, and her eyes immediately darted down to confirm that she was hallucinating, because why else would she be imagining the feel of Neji's hand in hers? But when she did indeed see that she was awake, and what was happening was real, her gaze switched to Neji's face, her eyes wide in confusion.

A small squeeze and then honestly, since she could see it in his eyes (she could read them so well), Neji said, "I'm sorry."

And Tenten's mind raced back to three weeks earlier, at the edge of the very same pond, where she and Neji stood side by side in a comfortable silence.

Tenten's heavy breaths were in time with Neji's and she leaned against a tree in exhaustion. When Neji had knocked on her door at nine in the evening to ask for a spar, Tenten had been genuinely surprised (they had already had their routine training session earlier that morning), but she couldn't refuse. Hyuuga Neji was asking for her company, even if it was only for training, and Tenten was not about to refuse.

As usual, their fight had been intense, bodies twisting and turning, and although they were usually a good few feet from each other, there were the brief moments when their arms brushed or Neji's long hair whipped across Tenten's shoulders and face. Her heart had been racing furiously from sheer excitement. It was thrilling, sparring with Neji; it filled her with so much joy and energy when she could stand her own against his relentless advances, because she knew that he saw her as a true ninja, and that acceptance was once all that she needed.

But now, acceptance alone didn't fill her heart completely, didn't pacify her hunger for something more. And as Tenten stood shoulder to shoulder with the Hyuuga prodigy, she had never been more certain of what she wanted.

It was one of those rare lapses in the usual fast pace of time that Tenten found her heart speed up, and she glanced sideways at the man next to her, who's eyes were aimed up at the starry sky peeking through the dark branches overhead. His face was blank, like it had been carved from the finest marble, without a blemish or impurity.

Undeniably gorgeous, Neji was; dark hair perfectly untangled, physically fit (and naively cute when he took his shirt off in front of Tenten after particularly grueling matches), deep silky voice, the list went on and on in Tenten's head.

"Tenten," Neji said, and Tenten jumped because she hadn't realized that she had been staring blatantly at him, and she was afraid that he had noticed. She would have to say something sometime, though.

Neji turned his head to her, and Tenten took a deep breath.

"I have to tell you something," they chorused at the same time.

Neji raised an eyebrow and Tenten crinkled hers.

"You first," they chanted, voices blending together, in a way adding depth to the silence.

Neji faltered and looked at the ground, and Tenten decided to take her chance, because it wasn't often the he gave her the opportunity to cut him off.

"I think I love you."

"I'm engaged."

Neji's eyes immediately darted to Tenten's face, surprise etched in his features, and he opened his mouth as if to speak, but no sound came out. Tenten stood stunned. It felt like a cold wave was washing over her, and all she could do was stand rigid as Neji's words rang throughout her ears. Was it possible?

"You're…engaged?" she managed to ask in complete shock, and the awkward silence that followed confirmed her fears. She raised her eyebrows slightly, staring into his eyes, silently pleading with him to tell her that it was a bad joke.

Neji closed his mouth and frowned, nodding his head silently in response to Tenten's question. Tenten took a shaky step back, all the while keeping eye contact as she shook her head back and forth slowly, her eyebrows furrowed in an expression of utmost confusion. She took another step back, and Neji reached out in one fluid motion to grab her wrist and keep her from retreating further.

"Tenten, I…"

"Who is it?" Tenten asked quietly, not even attempting to fight against Neji's grip. Neji looked away, and mumbled something under his breath, and Tenten knew something was very wrong because Neji was the Hyuuga prodigy and he didn't mumble.

"Who, Neji?" Tenten asked again, her voice strained.

"…Hinata."

Tenten gasped and stifled a sob by pressing her free palm over her mouth. It was wrong, so so so wrong. Why, why had everything suddenly just fallen apart in a matter of minutes? Why did her confession have to be buried by the bombshell that was released at the same time she exposed her heart fully? Why did it have to hurt so much? She bit her bottom lip to try to give herself another pain to focus on, anything was better than the ache in her chest. She pulled her arm back feebly, but Neji wouldn't let go.

"The clan…they decided on it…I have no choice," he rambled, staring intently at something to Tenten's left, and voice desperate for reasons Tenten couldn't guess.

His excuses fell on deaf ears, for Tenten choked out a "Congratulations," as the first warm tear trickled down her face, completely out of place next to the wide smile her mouth had formed (though it was an obvious fake). Neji glanced back at her, and when he saw that she was crying, he dropped her arm out of shock. It was so unlike her to show weakness…

Tenten's arm fell limply to her side, and the simple action of letting go, letting her go, broke through the dam she had been trying to keep strong, and the river started down her moon-kissed cheeks, illuminated in the darkness. Neji noticed his mistake, and tripped over an apology, but Tenten shook her head to tell him to stop.

"Don't," she said thickly, wiping away the silver tear tracks with the back of her hand. "Just…pretend…pretend I didn't say anything." And with another painfully forced smile, she added, "I'm…happy for you," but the tears leaked through her closed eyelids, and before she could break down anymore, she turned to walk away. But Neji grabbed her wrist again, and Tenten let out a shuddering breath. Why couldn't he understand that every time he spoke to her, touched her, he was just making it harder for her to leave?

"I'm sorry."

Tenten pulled her hand away and kept her back to Neji as she said, "Let's pretend this conversation didn't ever happen." Because it was the best way, she decided. If he would pretend that he didn't know she was painfully in love with him, and she would pretend to be blissfully surprised when the engagement was publicized, it would all be for the better. Things could go on…like normal.

Whatever normal was. Tenten just didn't know anymore.

Tenten walked away without a backward glance.

Tenten didn't pull her hand away, as she was sure Neji expected, but simply said, "There's no point in being sorry. It's decided; nothing can be done. It's fate…right?" she asked with a small smile which wasn't as forced as before, since she no longer hid the sadness behind the normally happy gesture.

"Fate…I don't know if I believe in it anymore."

"What do you mean?" Tenten asked in puzzlement. Neji had always believed in fate. The word itself made her think of him.

Neji looked into her eyes for a moment before glancing up at the stars. "If this is fate…it doesn't feel…right," he struggled slightly with his words, eyebrows creasing as he searched for the right ones. "If this is fate, then it's proven itself to be a cruel thing," he finished finally. Tenten realized that he must have been trying to sympathize with her.

"But, it must all be for the best." She sounded unsure despite herself, and when Neji squeezed her hand again, the small comforting gesture just made her even more unsure, because she still wanted him so much, and now she would never get him. Truthfully, it didn't feel like it was for the best at all.

"You sound like you don't care anymore."

Tenten took a calming breath to organize her thoughts. "I care…too much I think, about this, because it hurts…so bad," she clutched the front of her shirt with her free hand, and lowered her chin to rest on her knuckles. "But…I've realized that no matter how much I…love you," she peeked up at Neji to see his reaction, but he just looked at her with his usual stoic gaze, "we weren't meant to be. You're a prodigy, you're Neji. Your name carries so much weight, so much reverence, and I'm just Tenten. I'm an orphan, I don't have a last name, I don't have anything."

"That's not true, Tenten," Neji said firmly, but Tenten gave him another cheerless smile.

"Isn't it? It's okay, I've accepted-" she stopped abruptly, because Neji had raised his other hand to cup the back of her head, and he moved so that he was standing directly in front of her. Tenten, caught off guard, stammered a confused, "N-Neji! Wh-"

But Neji didn't give her the opportunity to think of a full, coherent sentence to stumble over, because her cut her off by sharply saying, "Tenten." She only had a second to try to interpret the fierce look he was giving her, before he leaned down and crashed his mouth onto hers.

A chill ran down her spine as she stood rigid, and when she didn't push him away, Neji continued. He pulled her hair out of its ties and tangled his fingers into the locks, all the while his mouth working against hers, teeth, tongue, and all. Tenten lost herself; she didn't know what was happening, it was all too sudden, so she didn't bother to try to figure it out. She kissed him back, squeezing his hand tightly and grasping at the front of his shirt with her other hand. Because in that moment of time, rules and fate and the need to decide between right and wrong were not present and did not matter.

Neji pulled her close and kissed her fiercely, with as much passion as he put into their spars. And amid the blurry thoughts that ran sluggishly through her head, something clicked, and Tenten thought she might understand Neji's true reasons behind coming to talk to her that night. If he had just wanted her R.S.V.P., he would have left her with her broken heart long ago. But he was still there, closer than he had ever been, with her or with anyone, and Tenten thought that maybe, just maybe, she understood.

When Neji pulled away, Tenten felt time crash to a halt, and as the whispers of his slightly irregular breathing left her face, she opened her eyes slowly, at first content to only stare at him in silence. And so they stood, hands still clasped, and for the first time in too long Tenten saw sadness in Neji's pale eyes.

"Why?" she asked once the ability to speak came back to her. She had a guess, a hope, as to why Neji had done what he had just done, but she needed to hear the truth from his own mouth.

"Because, I needed to show you that you had something," Neji answered, and Tenten almost missed the next words that he muttered quickly, awkward when it came to his own feelings. "My heart."

Tenten's lower lip trembled and before she even knew what had gotten into her, she let out a laugh. "Neji, how could to say something so cheesy?" And then she felt a hot tear escape each eye, and then two more, and then her laughter died away, only to be replaced by silent tears. "Why didn't you ever tell me?" she asked.

"I knew that it wouldn't work. I knew that this day would come, when I would have to marry inside the clan. I didn't want to start anything that would have to be abandoned in the end…"

"But then why did you just kiss me?! That contradicts everything you just said!" Tenten exclaimed, and she wondered if Neji even knew how his decision to kiss her was even affecting her.

"I wanted…" Neji faltered, and he closed his eyes. When he reopened them he said, "I wanted to get the chance to see what I would be missing for the rest of my life."

Tenten shook her head and said desperately, "But wouldn't it have just been better not to do that?"

"I don't know," Neji said simply. "I can't take it back now, I don't want to."

"But that doesn't change anything, because you're going to leave now, and we'll pretend that this meeting never happened, because we're teammates and we know that we aren't supposed to let emotions meddle in what's supposed to be 'strictly business,'" Tenten finished for him, and Neji nodded and loosened his grip on her hand. "You should probably go," she told him, voice colder than she intended, even though every fiber of her being wanted the opposite.

Tenten let her hand fall from his and tried to ignore the painful lurch of her heart as he took a step back from her. "I'll see you… at the wedding," he said before fixing her with one more look that said all that he couldn't bring himself to say out loud, the first and foremost being, 'I'm sorry that it has to end this way.' Then he turned and began to walk away, leaving Tenten more alone that ever.

"Goodbye, Neji," she whispered at his back, but her voice was lost in the breeze, and all too soon she was left with only the sound of the tree leaves rustling together in the silvery light, the only other voice apart from hers in the lonely forest.

A/N: Hope you liked it. The last part will come whenever i have time to sit down and type it. Please review!