Nearly There

Hello again. This is the third piece to go with "Betchin' Blog" and "Fecking Diary" This would be Near's private blog/ journal.

Day Nineteen

My Wi-fi shut down. It has been quite a while... I finally got it working again... I'm.. glad.I'm not grounded anymore, that ended ages ago....my hair is white again, except for the tips... it grows fast...

I'm very sad right now. Not "emo"... Sad.I think I'm suffering from Separation anxiety...

Separation anxiety is a psychological condition in which an individual has excessive anxiety regarding separation from home or from people to whom the individual has a strong emotional attachment (like a father and mother).

Present in all age groups, adult separation anxiety disorder (affecting roughly 7% of adults) is more common than childhood separation anxiety disorder (affecting approximately 4% of children). Separation anxiety disorder is often characterized by some of the following symptoms:

Recurring distress when separated from the subject of attachment (such as significant other, the father or the mother, or home).
Persistent, excessive worrying about losing the subject of attachment.
Persistent, excessive worrying that some event will lead to separation from a major attachment.
Excessive fear about being alone without subject of attachment.
Persistent reluctance or refusal to go to sleep without being near a major attachment figure, like a significant other or mother.
Recurrent nightmares about separation

..... just replace "mother" with "daughter'....

My little Natasha....who I've taken care of during this whole honey moon thing (with Elliot's help)..... she's off with Matt and Mello.... and... I can't -breathe- right...... I

I apologize. I was... interrupted. I ... am crying now. Elliot just... hugged me.... and tried to...make me feel better....

I... -hurt-. Elliot had one of his Doctors come and look at me.... apparently I'm fine.

I thought that once Kira was dealt with, I would be happy. I know where he is. I finally have him behind bars. It was easy enough after the wedding to get a shot of sodium diopenthal into 's system, and "suggest" he give up memory of the death note and cough up the address off his lover. I thought that once I knew that my mother, Misora, had been avenged, I would be happy. I... still miss her, as well... a seperation from someone that I never really knew. I really want my mo

I again apologize. I keep getting .... hugged...and comforted....

I just cried on Jade's shoulder. She is a permanent fixture in this house now. Oh yes...I moved in with Elliot. What with Lidner going off to Cuba the minute Kira was apprehended, Rester having quit ages ago, and Givanni clearly wanting to take advantage of a certain mind-wiped lawyer.... I didn't want to be alone in that big SPK building with Natasha.... so Elliot let me live with him and Jade.... I've spent some time with James, Matt's dad as well. We still get along like we did when we first met.... he likes Natasha. He will make for a good grand-father. So does Elliot...

I'm so damn lonely though... even with people cuddling me.... I feel.... she's my -daughter-, dammit.... and though her mother may be a fucking bitch.....

This is pointless. I'm going to go sleep. I'm glad I could get this out. I'll have to re-read it later and see what can be gleaned...

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