Kaiba's Macabre Halloween Bash
Author's Note – Tis the end of our macabre saga – once again, thanks to my reviewers!! And enjoy.-wipes away a tear-
Chapter 13
Sex Tapes Conclude The Nightmare
"Stop…Seto…hehe… that tickles…"
Kaiba heard Kisara purr lazily in her slumber, and smirked.
She's so adorable when she does that, he thought as he nuzzled the back of her neck; clutching her form to his.
Pretty snug, huh? Kaiba thought so too, that is, until he felt a warm breath behind his neck.
"What the-?" Kaiba murmured, alarmed as he turned over, coming nose to nose with Pegasus. That's right – PEGASUS.
"Kaiba-boy…" Pegasus winked as Kaiba responded completely horror-stricken, "Oh God no, this can't be happening - Oh God nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-"
"GAHHHHHHHHHH!"
Kaiba bolted upright in bed, covered in cold sweat as he recalled the ultimate nightmare in vivid detail, just suppressing a shudder.
"What's wrong?" Kisara muttered sleepily and curled up closer to him; with a sigh of relief Kaiba replied, "Nothing…"
Meanwhile a quiet snigger emitted from within a closet.
"Shhhhh… he'll never know…" Pegasus whispered conspiratedly as he continued to watch with apprehension.
"You're such a closet pervert!" Yami Bakura aimed a glance at Pegasus as he lowered the video camera, remembering to set the volume on mute before replaying the footage he just recorded…
"Hey guys – it just occurred to me, what happened to Kisara and Kaiba?" Joey asked as he scratched his head stupidly; Duke shrugged in response and decided not to answer. He knew what they were doing… and he wasn't about to crush Serenity's hopes, or piss Joey off, for that matter, not when he just woke up – he could just picture the idiot's response…
"WHAAAT?? THEY'RE DOING WHAT??"
"Calm down Joey," Mai said while stifling a yawn.
"No fair Mai, if Tristan and Tea are gonna make breakfast for themselves, it's only fair they make some for the rest of us!" Joey replied indignantly, food was a religion for Joey.
Yugi joined in the laughter, as Joey had Tristan pinned against the wall in a matter of seconds.
It was officially the afternoon after Halloween, I mean really – everyone only really crashed at 5 am (with TWO notable exceptions… -cough KAIBAandKISARA cough-) which meant that the gang slept like the dead until 1 o'clock… when they got hungry…
"Ah! There are the happy bunny rabbits now!" Duke called out mockingly as Kisara emerged – dressed ONLY in Kaiba's expensive black shirt, with Kaiba trailing behind her wearing a wolfish grin upon his face.
Considering the scandal this would create, it was fortunate that the gang was oblivious to what had transpired between Kaiba and Kisara earlier.
"Morning…" Kisara called out delightedly as Kaiba handed her a cup of coffee.
"Hey what happened to you guys? You missed breakfast," Tristan said as Joey released his hold on him.
"No I didn't," Kisara replied brightly, insinuating innuendo only Kaiba and Duke fully understood.
"No kidding…" Duke whispered under his breath as Bakura and Marik emerged, looking at Kisara and Kaiba knowingly.
"Yeah, Kaiba gave Kisara a little something, something…" Marik added with an explicit smirk. Joey and Tristan appeared affronted.
"WHY DIDN'T I GET SOME?" Joey demanded, mistaking Marik's comment to mean food…
"YEAH SHARING IS CARING!" Tristan agreed, as Bakura cut in awkwardly, "Not where this is concerned, trust me…"
"I get it!" Mai gasped and shook her head disbelievingly, "Kisara, you dirty little whore – I wanted the Billionaire! How else am I supposed to support myself without some rich guy paying my way??"
Kisara shrugged nonchalantly, "Whoring, erotic dancing and prostitution not doing it any more?"
Kaiba laughed at Kisara's use of blunt sarcasm and found it ironic how Mai was the only one who had caught on; even Tea remained ignorant – Oh wait. That's right, Tea has never been laid before, she only wishes she was – and the guys here are all virgins regardless, Kaiba thought with a smirk.
"What happened to your corset, Kisara?" Tea demanded with an accusatory glare which Kisara responded with a blush tainting her cheeks.
"I decided to alleviate Kisara of her corset my own way," Kaiba smirked, heavy innuendo suggested as he thought, Let Tea make of that as she wants.
"Hey mutt," Kaiba addressed Joey arrogantly, "Hand me another cup of coffee."
"WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE, HUH?" Joey demanded, getting fired up as usual.
"Do I really have to answer that question?" Kaiba said coolly, and added mockingly after receiving a rebellious look from Joey, "Wheeler, you are my bitch – accept who you are, and fulfill your duty as the dingle berry brained chuckling chump that you are AND GIVE ME MY COFFEE ALREADY!"
"Seto gets really aggro when he hasn't had enough coffee…" Kisara clarified mildly, fingering a pool que lightly as Kaiba at the spur of a moment, took a sticky note and scrawled "Seto Kaiba made me his bitch" across the surface, and stuck the piece of paper against Joey's forehead.
In response, Joey crumpled said sticky note and declared hot-headedly, "I'm all man, Kaiba!"
"Prove it!" Kaiba challenged, folding his arms across his chest in a typical defiant gesture.
"A'RIGHT!" Joey then showed his middle finger at Kaiba before dropping his pants, flipped the bird and turned around as he slapped his ass.
Innocent Serenity gasped in horror, as everyone (excluding Kaiba) dropped to the floor anime style. Kaiba's right eye twitched as his brain tried to process what it had just seen.
"JOEY!" Kisara growled, advancing on a laughing Joey, "TWO SECONDS AND THIS QUE IS GONNA MAKE A VERTICAL INSERTION UP YOUR ANUL CAVITY!"
Abruptly, Joey shut his mouth as Kaiba said smoothly, "Better do as she says – she bites."
When no one replied because they were rendered speechless, dazed and confused, Kaiba added, "Seriously – I have the marks to prove it!"
"I don't wanna know…" Duke shook his head to clear it of the images that just crossed his mind and suddenly fell to his knees, "NOOO THE IMAGES ARE FOREVER BURNT INTO MY SUBCONSCIOUS!"
"Your imagination is not capable of actually reconstructing what I saw… recorded…" Yami Bakura sneered, appearing with the video camera in hand, ignoring the bewildered expressions that crossed everyone's faces.
"THERE YOU ARE!" Bakura exclaimed, "YOU SAID YOU'D GET IN ME GODDAMNIT!"
Too bad no one understood that Bakura was referring to Yami Bakura occupying his body once again…
"Oh Goooood… the images….. ahhhhhhhh!!" Duke screamed again as he ran promptly into the nearest wall.
"I promised no such thing," Yami Bakura denied brusquely before adding, "Tell you what, in exchange for money will you leave me alone?"
"How much money?" Bakura asked, now intrigued by the proposition; Yami Bakura replied off-handedly as he briefly considered how much the footage on his camera would be worth on e-bay, "A couple of Million. Minimum."
"Ack…" Yugi gasped in shock, "That's a lot of money – where did you get the money from?"
"Good question…" Bakura glared suspiciously at his evil self; Yami Bakura shrugged, "Who wouldn't pay millions for 3 hour footage of how sexy Seto Kaiba got de-virginized? Exactly."
"So true…" Marik laughed, "Kaiba got laid, and cute 'Kura is making a couple of Mil' out of the deal – hahahaha! Pure genius!"
When Kisara finally recovered her voice she exclaimed angrily, "WHAT??" and then turned to Kaiba briefly to utter curiously, "You're a virgin?"
"Not anymore…" Kaiba replied with an ironic grin; Kisara replied astounded, "I would never have guessed…"
"Likewise," Kaiba agreed before aiming a death glare at Yami Bakura, "I refuse to allow you to release that footage!"
"Well, this certainly is an exciting change of events!" Mai exclaimed, noticing that Duke, Marik, Bakura and Yugi were the only people paying attention to the situation; the rest of the gang was mesmerized by the food Tea was preparing… heeeey, hunger makes you do strange things…
"… and you didn't kiss her?" Marik demanded – completely off-topic from the current situation, as Yugi had recounted how forward and strange Tea was when the Pharaoh had taken over his body, moments before he 'died'.
"There wasn't a signal!" Yugi replied with a blush; Marik released a sharp sound from between his clenched teeth in annoyance, "There is no signal!"
"But I didn't know that! Besides, in all the movies there is always a signal!" Yugi insisted, waving his arms awkwardly in his defense.
Marik then growled – it always annoyed him when people don't get laid – and promptly marched determinedly to Yami Bakura, gripped the man around his neck and planted a hard kiss on his lips.
"Ack…." Duke gasped before falling over, while Kisara appeared bemused. Kaiba merely crossed his arms resolutely and sighed in response; Yami Bakura had pulled away and coughed, wiping his lips with the back of his hand roughly.
"See?? He didn't give me a signal! But I kissed him!" Marik declared proudly before rounding on dear innocent little Yugi, "Are we clear?" he added darkly.
"Eep!" Yugi replied dubiously as he side-glanced Yami Bakura who was glaring daggers at Marik.
"Warn me next time you try to do that so that I can rip your tongue out…" Yami Bakura growled with a moody look clouding his features.
Marik laughed in response, "Oh come on, it wasn't that bad! I was just making a point."
"A POINT? I'LL SHOW YOU A POINT!" Yami Bakura growled as he wrestled Marik to the ground, completely discarding the video camera… the video camera which Kaiba picked up, removing the tape.
"I'm so over Halloween," Kaiba uttered darkly as he massaged his temples in annoyance before turning to Kisara, "I hope you understand…""
"That it was a one night stand only?" Kisara finished carefully, and grinned as she kissed Kaiba on the cheek, refusing to glance behind her even once as she left the Kaiba's other mansion.
Stunned, Kaiba watched as she returned hurriedly with an anime sweatdrop, "Errr… excuse me, I forgot about my clothes!" Kisara then sprinted upstairs, ruining the badass moment.
Kaiba then laughed maniacally, only to receive a whack on the head as Kisara emerged fully dressed, "I thought I told you to stop doing that!"
Kaiba smirked.
And then it occurred to him – I still have one thing left to do…
"KAIBA-BOY!"
Kaiba merely continued to shovel dirt until the grave was flat and all you could hear was the muffled screams of Pegasus buried six feet underground…
"KAIBA-BOY?? WHAT ARE YOU- THERE ARE BUGS! NOOO I HATE BUGS…"
With a final grunt of effort, Kaiba stuck the shovel into the ground so that it stood erect and folded his arms across his chest – smirking maliciously as Pegasus continued to cry out.
I said I'd make you pay…
"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"