It was, perhaps, fitting that the whole tragic mess find its inevitable finish at the Ace Chemical Plant

It was, perhaps, fitting that the whole tragic mess found its inevitable finish at the Ace Chemical Plant. That the legendary rivalry between Batman and the Joker end in the same place that it began, so very long ago.
But let us not get ahead of ourselves.

Commissioner Gordon- former Commissioner now- had been on his way home from his retirement party. He'd been unable to avoid the many toasts in his honor, and being the conscientious lawman that he was, decided to take a cab home. But first, he felt like taking a walk He slowly walked down the street, thinking back on his career. On that hellish first year in Gotham- arriving from Chicago to find that the Police were no better than the criminals. He thought about the first rumors he'd heard of an urban avenger who dressed as a bat. His numerous citations for bravery and efficiency. How his ailing health and political pressure had combined to force him into retirement.

Finally, he saw a cab coming down the street, and since he felt much better he signaled the cabby to pull over. He opened the door and slid in telling the driver his address. The driver nodded and drove off, but soon slowed down.

"Hey, Mac" the driver said, his voice deep and somehow familiar. "Do you mind if we pick up that dame? It ain't exactly safe for a lady to be out alone this time of night." The driver pointed one gloved hand at a young woman standing at the curb, dressed in a wide hat and long coat. Gordon, knowing that a woman out in Gotham at two am risked death or worse, nodded his head in agreement. The door opened again and Gordon slid over to make room.
As she entered, the woman doffed her hat, revealing a face covered in white greasepaint and a domino mask.
"Harley Quinn!" Gordon sputtered, reaching for the other door. With a loud click, the car doors locked. The driver turned around, revealing a face that would haunt Gordon to his dying day.

"Sorry Gordy!" The Joker cackled "No exiting the ride until it comes to a full and complete stop! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!"
Gordon felt something pierce his neck, and turned to see Harley holding a small hypodermic needle just before he lost consciousness.

Gordon awoke to find himself tied to a wheelchair, which in turn was hanging from a winch over a vat of chemicals. With what he knew of the Joker, it wasn't hard to guess where he was, or what was going to happen.

"Let me guess" he called out "We're at the Ace Chemicals plant, and you're going to give me an acid bath ha-ha-ha etcetera."

"Hmm…not quite" the Joker answered from below. Gordon craned his neck and saw the maniac fiddling with the controls for the vat beneath him. "Ah, there we go. Sorry to ignore you G-Piggy but there was a spot of trouble getting the pH balance right. No, this isn't acid chum, it's…well, actually I don't think it has a formal name. It's the same stuff I took a swim in so many years ago. Oh damn! Now the acid-base ratio is off!"

Gordon swallowed. The Joker was a lunatic but he was also a chemical genius. There was little doubt he could synthesize the chemicals that created him if he wanted to. The question was why?

"I bet you're wondering why." The monstrous mountebank said, not looking up from his work "Why am I, the greatest criminal mind in all of Gotham, wasting my time with a B-List character like you. Why turn my undeniable brilliance loose on some over-age cop? Well, the truth is Gordo, you're just a small part of my plan. That's got it, finally done." The clown finally looked up from the controls at Gordon.

"You see, Batman likes you- God alone knows why. By threatening to jokerize you, I guarantee that he'll come. Then I'll offer to let you go if he'll take your place! The heroic boob won't be able to resist! And then we'll get to see if his face really DOES crack if he smiles! HAHAHAHAHAHAAAHHAHAAHAHA!"

"You're delusional, Joker." Gordon spat.

"Maybe so" the Joker said as he began to ascend to the catwalk, which hung over the vats. "But at least I'm sexy! Or at least that's what all the fangirls on the Internet seem to think. HAR-LEY! A little music while we wait if you please."

"Right-A-Roony, Mista J" Harley chirped, pulling out a kazoo. She took a deep breath and began to play 'Danny Boy'. The kazoo music persisted as the Joker walked up to a series of levers, which undoubtedly controlled the winch.

"Now, any minute now the Dork Nut will be along, and we can begin his beauty treatment".

"Guess again Joker." The deep, gravely voice echoed through the largely silent factory until it was impossible to say where it came from. It seemed to be everywhere and nowhere. The Joker perked up, and his smile got visibly wider.

"Ah, Batsy! Right on time, as always! Now, you know the—Ooof!" The Joker was sent sprawling by a flying kick from Batman. The Dark Knight stood slowly, his face tight with anger.

"It's over, Joker. Batgirl, free Gordon" he said, speaking to a black-clad female figure who emerged from the shadows. Batgirl nodded, and moved to the controls, only to be hit with a surprise attack from Harley Quinn.

"Not so fast, BatBitch! Puddin' has plans, an' you ain't gonna be the one ta ruin 'em"

Up on the catwalk, the Joker and Batman continued their deadly dance. The Joker had unsheathed his sword cane, and was taking swings at his adversary. Though Batman was easily able to avoid the blade, he was unable to close with the Joker- he was only able to force him back. The battle slowly moved down catwalk, and down the line of massive vats- each with their own deadly contents.

The two combatants were tireless, and fairly evenly matched. Though he lacked Batman's muscle and extensive martial arts training, the Joker's tall frame and his sword gave him a decided reach advantage. Moreover, both knew their opponents; they knew every trick their enemy had.

The Joker risked a glance at Harley. The worthless girl was being beaten to a pulp by that silent brat, and soon the Joker would have two Bat- Buttinskis to deal with. Unless…The Joker decided to take a gamble. He hurled his sword at the control box for the winch, striking the main lever perfectly. With a whine of machinery, Gordon was lowered towards the glowing chemical vat below.

Batgirl, knowing that civilians were always the priority, abandoned her battle with Harley and dove for the controls. She managed to reach it and forced the lever back up. Gordon's descent was halted just over the

Pool of chemicals, and he breathed a sigh of relief. With Gordon rescued, and Harley on the ropes, it looked as though Batman's victory was inevitable. And that's when it all went wrong.

Batman had turned briefly to check on Gordon, and in that moment of hesitation, the Joker struck. Launching himself through the air, he smashed into his hated enemy. Batman, distracted and off-balance, was sent over the edge of the catwalk, as was the Joker. The two plummeted towards a vat of hydraulic acid, being prepared for industrial use at the factory.

Batman reached for his zip-line, intending to fire off a rope and swing away, but found his hands being seized by iron-strong fingers. The Joker laughed.

"This is it, Batso! This is the end! We go together! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-HA-HA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!"
The pair hit the liquid with a colossal splash. Batman tried to swim for the surface, but the Joker clung to him with all the strength within his lanky body. The clown's mouth was still twisted into a grin, even as the acid began to dissolve their flesh.

The next day, the vat of acid was drained by the police. As the chemical was emptied, Gordon tried to convince himself that this wasn't happening.

'He's survived everything else' he reasoned desperately 'he has to have survived this'

Watching from the rafters, Nightwing and Batgirl were telling themselves much the same thing.

"It's Bruce" Nightwing said, more to himself than to Batgirl "He's immortal. A bit of chemicals can't take him down- he probably used his Anti-Acid Batspray, and is just waiting to be let out"

Batgirl turned her head towards the older crimefighter "Anti-Acid Batspray?"

"Whatever! Point is, he's fine. He has to be…"

Below, Harvey Bullock supervised the emptying of the vat. Truth to tell, he still didn't much like the Batman. He wasn't comfortable when civilians put on long underwear and took the law into their own hands- but he didn't wish the freak harm. So he was somewhat put out by what he discovered.

Two skeletons, one still bearing scraps of a Batsuit, with their hands around one anothers throats.

A/N
Not the end!
This is the only appropriate way for Batman to die. Locked in combat with the Joker, with each killing the other. Chapter two will be up soon.