ONCE UPON A TROUBADOR

Sasuke Uchiha, guitarist and lyricist for the band Crimson Kunai. Naruto Uzumaki, exotic dancer at the gay club Passion Play. What happens when these two very different worlds collide? SasuNaru, Shounen-ai, Yaoi, underage drinking.

A/N: I really don't know where I got this idea, but it's stuck with me since December. So I've given into the plot bunny and started to pen it...er type it rather.

Warnings: SasuNaru, male/male, shonen-ai, yaoi, all that fun stuff. Also, underage drinking, mention of prostitution.

Don't like, don't read. Flames will be used to roast marshmallows.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto...that should be obvious.

Chapter 1: We Can't Go On Like This

"Sai, get off me!" Sasuke shouted, shoving Sai back. Sai's head hit the wall with a sickening 'crack'. "That's the tenth time today you've tried to either kiss me, grope me, or both!"

"Oh, come on, Sasuke-kun. I'm just trying to have a little fun. Loosen up, you're too serious. ...You know what you need?" He walked back and leaned up to whisper in the other's ear. "You need a good fuck. It'll solve all your problems. I'd be...more than happy to help." He gave a slight squeeze to Sasuke's groin.

"No, just get away from me!" He pushed Sai away, causing him to fall flat on his ass. "I can't work with you anymore. You're out of the band! Grab your stuff and clear out of here. Now." His eyes and voice turned cold with his last words. It was enough to make any normal person cower in fear. But Sai was not a normal person and merely shot him a seductive grin before getting up and leaving the room.

"You'll see, someday you'll be begging to have me back," Sai said as he left the room.

"Hn, somehow I doubt that." Sasuke turned to find Neji and Gaara to inform them they had to look for a new vocalist.

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The beat of the music blasted in Naruto's ears as he spun around oncemore, running his hands down his sides, his most seductive smile on his face. He paused and faked a yawn.

"You know guys, I'm getting kind of tired, I think I might have to take a little break." A groan of dissatisfaction from the audience. "That is, unless you guys can make it...worth it for me to stay a little while longer?"

Immediately several twenty and a few hundred dollar bills found their way to the stage. Naruto grinned, bending down slowly to pick them up, his skimpy outfit riding up his ass as he did so. Their was a cry of approval from the audience. After tucking them securely into the side of the thong, he started to dance again. He kept dancing for the next twenty minutes.

"Alright guys, now I've really got to take a break. Don't go anywhere, I'll be back soon!" he winked at the audience before walking offstage.

Once safely out of view, he sighed, collapsing into a chair.

"Oh, Naruto-kun?" a voice called from behind a curtain, obviously trying to sound sweet and caring. He cringed at the nickname. Why did Orochimaru have to call him that? The way Orochimaru always tried to pretend he cared had always disturbed Naruto.

"Yes, Orochumaru?" he responded as he had been trained.

"Did you recieve any special bonuses today?"

"Yes, Orochimaru," he sighed, handing him the money through the curtain. He stashed one hundred dollar bill away, though, to add to his pathetically small savings.

"I've got a...potential customer for a 'private show' for you tonight. Just thought I'd let you know."

'Shit, he wants me to get fucked into the matress by some random guy again tonight!? He's done this almost every night since I turned 18. I'm still fucking sore from last time. I'm lucky I can still dance with this stupid pain! Can't I ever even have a night off!?' he thought iritably, supressing a groan of frustration. "Yes, Orochimaru."

"Good boy," he replied, walking off.

'I am not your dog! Perverted, horny, old, idiotic bastard!' How Naruto longed to yell something like that at him. But he knew, if he did, he'd soon find himself on the street. The street was not a friendly place for someone like Naruto. Especially not anymore.

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