Yaoi-ness L/Light…L/cake .:2 chapters long:.

Sweet Revenge

Light didn't like getting up at three am to watch a detective eat cake. No one liked to watch someone eat cake. And though he didn't particularly like desserts, the teenager resented not being offered a slice. It was the least L could do, yet he just sat there, eating more than any ordinary person could, then went back to bed. His only kindness was to let Light sleep in a half hour on the morning after his jaunts.

L seemed particularly protective of his cake, too. It wasn't enough to constantly eat what most would consider gourmet, elegant, and incredibly yummy food, he wouldn't let anyone else touch it. L had once glared Matsuda out of the room for catching some icing on his finger, then proceeded to do the same, probably just to put everyone else off.

Light hadn't realised just how domineering L was till they were chained together, but now he wondered how no one else saw it. The detective seemed to take pleasure in tugging Light away by the handcuff a second before Misa lunged at him, causing the girl to tumble into Matsuda, a chair, a desk, Matsuda, a pile of files, Matsuda, and anything else nearby… or Matsuda, nearby or not. Then he would simply state that "Light-kun has work to do, you shouldn't disturb him." Which, in Light's opinion, translated to "Keep your hands off my stuff, bitch." At times Light wondered if he really was just a slice of Yagami cake. Silent, only truly appreciated by L, and no one but the detective himself was allowed access.

Of course, while Light had hypothesised over the depth of L's obsession, he hadn't any idea how deep it was. Not just about the strawberry sponge, either.

"Matsuda-san! Will you pass me those files… no… no… ye- no…" With infinite patience, L watched Matsuda point to files, round black eyes blank and half closed. In one hand was a small silver spoon, in the other a half eaten cake. Light watched absently as the raven haired individual spooned and slowly devoured the last bit of cake on the plate, leaving only the strawberry that always went last. The teenager was still for a moment, debating the consequences, and decided a slap on the wrist would be utterly worth it.

Nimble pianist's hands darting quickly, he grabbed the strawberry from the plate and threw it into the air, catching it between his teeth. Beside him, L stiffened visibly, then span around and lunged forward, momentum knocking the two of them off the chair and onto the ground. The pale genius didn't stop there, either. With a growl Light hadn't known he was capable of, L grabbed both the teen's wrists in an almost-game of mercy, pining them on either side of his head and looking him in the eyes.

Light paled. L looked pissed off. Slowly, delicately, the man lowered his head, and it took Light a moment to realise the strawberry was still between his teeth. L wouldn't… he wouldn't… he was about to. Realising what was about to happen, Light struggled suddenly, then began thrashing against his captor.

The detective was unbalanced by the unexpected movement, and the two of them were suddenly pitched in a violent battle over a strawberry. Light could've just swallowed it, but that wouldn't have been fair play.

"Hey, hey!" Yagami-san realised what was happening and stood quickly, rather sick of breaking the two of them up, but knowing no one else would. "Both of you! We have a murderer to catch!"

Light cried out as L's nail caught his neck, then returned the scratch with a bruise, going completely still at the sound of his father's voice. They lay there, L straddling his captive's waist, still holding onto each other's wrists and tangled in the chain. The chief was about to speak again when L realised the strawberry was no longer between Light's teeth -dislodged by his cry.

Like a hawk attacking a mouse, the detective darted down and roughly pushed their mouths together, forcing Light's lips open.

"Nnn!" The teenager was shocked more than horrified, struggling as L searched for his prize, thanking god he hadn't swallowed. Chief Yagami was staring at them, his expression far beyond mortal bonds of horror.

Light couldn't think, the feel of the soft, hot muscle against his own tongue almost too much to contemplate. It felt far better than it should, and no girlfriend had ever had the main objective of taking back a piece of fruit just as soft and wet as their tongue. He almost had to bite back a moan when L made an unexpected noise of triumph, pulling back up with the strawberry in his celebratory jaws. Light, still trapped beneath him, unable to do anything but watch him slowly savour the fruit, a mix of juice and -possibly Light's- saliva trickling down his chin. The others had jumped up when Souichiro had shouted, and seen the strawberry salvage mission. For a moment, no one spoke.

Light looked up into L's self-righteous face. "I hate you so much." L raised his eyebrows, looking down at the teen.

"Light-kun shouldn't have taken my strawberry." Light-kun was thinking about taking it back by performing a caesarean. Light-kun knew this was illegal, and decided to find another way to make that vampiric freak pay.

Despite fury Light felt at being violated by the detective's tongue, on returning to work at the furthest possible work terminal, he took a deep breath. L had been the one to move away from Light, very obviously taking his sweets as far from the teenager as possible. Light had rolled his eyes, replying to the silent insult that he didn't want to be anywhere near a rapist anyway. And now, safely out of eyeshot, he leisurely licked his lips.

He'd tasted it when L had kissed him… since technically, that was what he'd done. Incredibly, L didn't taste like the production floor of a candy factory. It was much more subtle than that, and far more fruity. Lovers made "you taste better than…" jokes all the time, but the honest truth was that strawberry was like the dried version of L. A weak, diluted version of the real thing.

And the real thing was gooood.

But Batman had never abandoned a plan because it turned out the Joker smelled like Grandma's home made cookies. Light was furious that L had reacted that way to a strawberry, not to mention the humiliation of being kissed in front of his father -by another male no less!- and would make the detective wish Kira had killed him when he'd first challenged the murderer.

And revenge would be sweet.

Little happened for the next week, in the case or otherwise, and if you ignored the side-long glances chief Yagami occasionally threw the genii, especially L, all was well. But Light was following a saying he'd discovered in an anime Sayu had watched. Bide your time and hold out hope. He did, and was rewarded with an early morning delivery the following Tuesday.

"Hurry up, Light-kun!"

"Okay, okay, I'm coming…" L always got like this when his desserts were brought in. Usually Watari would cart the lot in while the team worked, but it was meant to come in on Mondays, and the delivery guy had called to apologise, and that it would come in the morning. Watari was busy, so it was up to Light to keep L from frothing at the mouth and eating the lot at once.

"Liiiggghhhttt-kuuuunnn!" The teenager was taking small joy in dragging his footsteps as L pulled him towards the loading garage. He hadn't had any sweets since Monday afternoon and it showed, spiky hair limp and dark eyes hollow. Sugar withdrawal hit faster than most.

But despite the bored demeanour, Light was just as excited as his chain-mate, if for different reasons. It didn't take "know thine enemy" style stalking to realise that getting to L was as easy as… eating a strawberry. Light, being the drama queen he was deep down, had something much bigger in mind. Bigger and far more coma-inducing.

The two of them had to take a number of trips up and down the stairs to carry the supply of sweets, and even then Light did most of the carrying, since after L's mere handful disappeared by the time they reached their floor on the first trip, he refused to let the detective have any more. Oh no, he wanted him starving.

Finally the last trip was through, and Light put the last box in the kitchen. L was squirming enough to make the chain jingle, and actually whined when Light pulled him out of the kitchen… soon… "Oh will you stop! Look, there's cake out here." There was. A big, crisp white box on the table. L lunged forward, just as Light had predicted he would.

He tugged sharply on the chain, L's momentum sending him into the swivel chair, and Light took the chance to wrap the chain around the pale man's wrists quickly, then once around the swivel chair's thin base. They were stuck closer together, but while L was trapped, Light had free movement, more or less, and could wheel the detective anywhere around the office.

But he didn't have too far to go.

"Light-kun!" L was calm, if annoyed, and watched Light without that much concern. "What's going on?" Light smiled sweetly, before setting one hand on the wooden coffee table the cake-box was sitting on, and took a seat beside it.

"Oh, nothing," purred the brunette. "I'm just… going to have a snack." L stared at him, not yet fully understanding. Light opened the cake box the way old fashioned brides undressed for their grooms. Ever so slowly, delaying the moment. As the beautiful sponge cake -coated in half an inch of vanilla butter icing, and that with strawberries around the edge, and thin slices decorating the surface.

Light turned, and looked the bound L straight in his endless black eyes. "Mmm… doesn't that look good?" There was little colour in the first place, but whatever was there drained from L's face.

"Light-kun…" Light ignored him, taking his time to cut into the cake with a knife he'd taken from the kitchen. "Light-kun…" He carefully dislodged the slice with two fingers, still looking at L, and smiled as the man began struggling. The chair wobbled as L's free legs thrashed, but he couldn't really move anywhere. Smile widening into a grin, Light took his time leaning in, and took a slow, large bite, and forced a purr from his throat. The effect was lost if he didn't look like he enjoyed it. It worked; L whimpered.

Light took another slow bite, licking the frosting from his lips. L was staring at him, furious. Light took a strawberry between his teeth, very delicately, and let his tongue wander over it's surface before biting down, letting the juice ooze down his chin, much like L had, and wiped it delicately from his chin. He took his time finishing the first slice, and by the second L stopped being a silent observer.

"Light-kun, put the cake down." The icing smudged his fingers, Light held the cake in one hand to lick his free fingers. "Light-kun. Put. It. Down." He murmured pleasantly as he swallowed, showing his enjoyment. "Light." Onto the third piece… the sheer will it was taking to eat so much cake hidden well. "Light…" L's growl bordered on desperate. "Light, I bought that with my money, it wasn't cheap…" What kind of begging was that? Light wanted begging. "Light!" He was having fun, now.

It kept going, and Light got what he wanted. If the detective had ever been sophisticated, his hair slick, his demeanour cool, then the mess that was L would represent pretty well what Light could see in his eyes. "Light! Seventy-nine per cent!" He'd taken to calling out seemingly random but ever growing percentages, knowing it would irritate the suspect, but Light saw the desperation and was unfazed. "Light, Light, please!" What was that?! "Light! LIGHT!" L screamed at him furiously.

At this point three things might be pointed out. One: Light was going to faint from the amount of cake he'd eaten. Two: L was freaking out because he hadn't had any candy since Monday afternoon, other than a small hand full, and he growing screams reflected by addict's pain. Three, Tuesday was a work day, and the investigation team had met Watari at the door. While the room was soundproof, once the door was open, the walls meant nothing.

"LIGHT!! Light, stop it! Stop it!" L's panicked voice carried into the other room, the group of them running to… do whatever it was that needed doing… and froze in the doorway. It wasn't horror or spectacle that did it, it was just…

"What the…?" For once, Matsuda got it perfectly right, at the sight of Light with one third of a sponge cake in one hand, a spoon in the other, and a trussed up L across from him. L caught sight of his caretaker and screamed out to him.

"Watari! Get him! He has to die! GIVE ME MY CAKE! Ahhh! I hate you!" The poor detective was almost in tears, struggling against his chain while Light continued to eat, spoonful by spoonful, in front of him. The teenager hadn't started off with a spoon, but he couldn't keep eating so much cake in mouthfuls. The world was swimming in front of him, and he couldn't properly taste what he was eating anymore. Revenge came at a high price, but Light knew that the threat of neither execution nor diabetes had ever kept him from his goals. "I'll kill you Kira!" L would probably need therapy after this, and that made Light pause.

Shaking his head in wonderment, Watari dashed forward and detangled L from his chair, a motion which tugged and swayed Light on his chain… that movement didn't feel too good… uggg… The second he was free, L lunged at the teenager, only to be caught around the waist by the white-haired man, and kicked and screamed at the top of his lungs. Light watched him from his position on the floor, never feeling more on top.

"I'll kill you! I'll make you pay! My cake! Watari, he ate my cake! My cake!" L collapsed, in near-tears while Watari held him, staring at Light.

"What… possessed you… to…?"

"Revenge." Light's tone would have worked better if he wasn't keeping down sponge and icing. Watari couldn't reply, instead carrying L into the kitchen -and therefore dragging Light with them both- where the detective grabbed a handful of cup cakes and began stuffing them into his mouth a little faster than he could swallow. Swallowing wasn't the important part; tasting was. The frenzied light in his eyes didn't exactly dim, but mellowed slightly, and Light took this time to push the cake further into the pits of his stomach.

Watari turned to leave the room, glancing at his employer then shaking his head at Light, the very picture of a disappointed preschool teacher. He obviously wouldn't, but Light thought he'd make a pretty good boarding school dean.

The teenaged psychopath -L's wording- didn't eat or talk very much for the rest of the day, and the investigation team attributed this to shame, which wasn't even close. L was traumatised, hugging his knees tighter than usual, and rocking back and forth, while staring at the air directly in front of him, almost cross-eyed, instead of through whoever he was talking to. Chief Yagami had a word with Watari, the two of them acting and feeling like the parents of two school boys.

"Listen, about Light-"

"Oh, it's fine, L'll be okay."

"Yeah, but I want to apologise, you know how kids get at school, and he won't be playing the PS2 after homework for a while."

"Well, I'll talk to L too, really, don't worry too much. See you at Peewee soccer?"

"If I let Light go, definitely. Ha ha."

Well, maybe that was an exaggerated version of their conversation, but it had the same basic aspects, and lack of respect for the subjects, who were going through the day's list of deceased criminals in a vain attempt to ignore the rest of the world. That was the way the day went, till everyone lingered at the doorway, wondering if it was safe to leave the two of them alone. L was the one to push them out the door, swearing not to wreak bloody revenge on the quiet teenager.

The second the door was closed, however, he grabbed the chain with both hands and dragged Light into the bathroom. "L, wha- Ahhh!" The detective took Light by the shoulders and began shaking him. They both knew where this was going, the motion building up horribly in Light's body till he dry-retched, L releasing him to where he collapsed against the cool porcelain of the toilet, not even able to manage the "you twisted son of a-" that was obviously forthcoming before vomiting.

L knew this would take a while, and took small pleasure in his enemy's pain. Good, good, now to call Watari. The phone barley rung once before the man's voice was heard, a testament to both skill and mistrust of Light. His child's smile playing on thin lips, L told the man what he wanted. Watari complied without comment, as he had when the first handcuff order had come in, and L hung up, turning back to the retching suspect.

"How do you feel, Light-kun?" Ah, calmness restored, the 'kun' was back in place. Light looked up, his expression stating very clearly how he felt, as if the nauseating flecks on his chin weren't enough. "Do you deserve it?" The rhetorical question was treated as such, and L shrugged absently, nothing like the emotional wreak he'd been reduced to. "I don't think so." He let the sentence end there, leaving Light to wonder whether that would go on to "you've suffered more than enough" or "you deserve worse."

Now is a good time to explain one: why L is so calm, and two: something else just as interesting. But I'm not going to. See you next chapter! WAH HA HA!

And there won't be a next chapter unless I get reviews! (a certain number, but I won't say how many, or people won't bother once it's reached)