slightly based on a dream i had where you got pregnant when you received a flyer, not beta'd or spellchecked, just had to get it out? Hope you enjoy!


Knocked Up

"So...Let me get this straight. You're telling me you got a flyer in the mail saying 'Congragulations! You're pregnant!'?" Nathan asked Peter for the fifth time, still convinced his brother was smoking something.

Peter Nodded his head while he drank his Kool-Aid that Angela had given him with a straw, "Uh hu. The flyer was pink so I guess that means I'm having a girl"

No, He was defintely convinced Peter was on something now. Nathan tried to hide his smile, it was just too funny though. He smiled a nodded his head, "Let's say for a moment that you are 'pregnant', who's the mom?"

To this Peter stopped drinking his Kool-Aid, set it aside and blink with a completely serious face, "I'm the mom Nathan, because I'm having the baby. I don't know who the dad is, Alot of different girls have molested me lately"

Nathan raised a brow and scoffed, "You let girls molest you?"

Peter cocked his head to the side, nodded and shrugged his shoulders, "They just can't help it"

Groaning Nathan shook his head, "My brother's a man whore"

Peter hadn't heard that though, he was busy rubbing his belly and cooing at it, quite frankly it freaked Nathan out even more. He'd lied before about his brother being mentally unstable, but there was no lying about it now, there was something wrong with him.

"I even took a pregnancy test"

"And?"

"Well it was blurry. So me, Hiro and Ando are going to the doctor to check again", Peter commented sucking on the last of his Kool-Aid, "Man! I finished it! Mom! Can I have another one?" He screamed from the office.

Nathan couldn't take it anymore. He massaged his temples and closed his eyes sighing, "Ok Pete, what are you taking? blow, crack? crystal meth? zig zags? Come on what have you taken?"

He giggled and shook his head, "Drugs are bad for you silly"

Without notice Hiro and Ando appeared out of thin air in the office, stumbling a little. Hiro threw his fist up into the air, "Fly man!"

"Oh god", groaned Nathan.

"What's going on here?" asked Claire walking into the office and turning to smile at Peter, "Hi uncle Peter", she cooed a little too sweetly.

he chuckled back and smiled, "Hi Claire"

"Apperently Peter here is pregnant"

Peter raised his finger, "And I'm having a girl"

"That's so awesome Peter! What are you going to name her?" Claire jumped and clapped her hands in excitement.

"No this isn't awesome! This is ridiculous! men can't get pregnant! That's just unnatural!" raged on Nathan.

They all stood in silence and stared at him while he fummed, only Hiro said something in japanese to Ando and Ando nodded turning to Nathan, "Hiro say you just jealous"

Nathan scoffed, "I am NOT jealous. I'm just worried that Peter really went crazy this time. I mean seriously you guys, a flyer?! you believe an effing flyer?"

Peter cupped his chest and moaned, "God my breast are so sore"

Doctor's Office

Peter sat on the doctors bench sucking on one of those lollipops they give kids when they visit the doctor. the door opened and an old hunchback doctor walked in and shook his head, "Peter, you aren't a kid anymore, you should really think about going to see the new doctor i recommended for you eight years ago"

Peter pouted, "but they don't have prizes! and they're office has boring colors"

The doctor sighed and shook his head again, "Ok what seems to be the problem Peter?"

A huge grin appeared on his face,"I'm pregnant!"

silence.

"Come again?"

"I said I'm pregnant. I'm having a girl, but I just wanted to see who the dad is"

Suddenly there was a knock on the door and the doctor went to open it to reveal Mohinder smiling, "I hear your pregnant Peter"

Peter touched his flast abs and smiled, "Yes I got the flyer a week ago, so I think like a week now"

Mohinder smiled back, "Congratulations! So you'd like to know which girl got you pregnant right?"

Peter's old doctor put his hand forth to stop them, "Wait a minute who are you? And how d you think you could be pregnant Peter? forget it, i'm retiring. You kids these days...just crazy"

The doctor walked out and both Mohinder and Peter shrugged their shoulders.

"So Peter...I need to know which girls have molested to you to see who got you pregnant"

Peter scratched his head, "Oh gosh, it's a lot though"

"I need to know in order to tell you Peter"

he took a deep breath and put out his fingers and started counting, "Well there was Simone, Eden, Candice, Caitlin, Audrey, Elle, Nikki, Jessica-"

"Aren't Nikki and Jessica the same person?"

Peter scoffed, "No! Believe me, they are completely different in bed. There was also Sandra"

"Anyone else?"

Peter blushed, "Well...yeah...but you can't tell Nathan!"

Mohinder pinky promised with Peter and Peter whispered in his ear, "Oh man that's fucked up"

Mohinder finished taking notes and told Peter he'd be in contact with him to tell him who the girl responsible for getting him pregnant was.

three weeks later, Petrelli Mansion

"Mom did you buy more Kool-Aid like I told you?!" Peter asked frantically.

"Yes, why?"

"I told you mom! Today Mohinder and i'll the girls are coming over to see who the dad is!"

Angela didn't take her eyes off the book she was reading, "Oh, right, right"

Peter huffed and crossed his arms, "You don't care mom do you? Why do you always ignore me?!"

Angela rolled her eyes, "Stop being so hormonal Peter"

The front door rang, and Peter ran to open it. All the girls that had molested him stood there and beemed at him when they saw him, "Hi girls!"

They all went to go sit down and waited nervously until Mohinder got there with the results. Claire, Hiro, Ando,

Nathan, Angela, and Heidi were also there for moral support. Claire made sure to hold Peter's hand though.

Mohinder paced the room and then turned to face everyone, "I will start by saying the names of the girls who aren't the one ok?"

They all nodded frantically.

He sighed and started, "Caitlin...You are not the father"

Caitlin ghasped, started crying, and ran out of the Petrelli mansion, "I'm going back to Cork!"

Mohinder frowned for a second, but shook his head, and continued, "Elle you are not the father"

she sighed with relief.

"Simone you are not the father"

She shrugged, "Oh well"

"Sandra you are not the father"

She fanned her self and sighed with relief, "Thank god! Mr Muggles would have killed me!"

They all weren't sure what she meant exactly but ignored her comment and turned back to Mohinder, "Eden you are also not the father, same goes for you Candice, and Jessica and Nikki"

All the girls shrugged, and were honestly quite relieved.

But Peter looked teary eyed and confused, "Than who is?"

Claire giggled and held his hand tightly,"Nathan Peter and I have something we want to tell you"

"No Claire you are not the father either", Mohinder rolled his eyes.

The room went silent, and everyone gasped. Peter let out a little laugh and Claire stared at him shocked, "Guess I am a man whore?"

"Then who is the father?" Nathan was really getting tired of Mohinder beating around the bush.

Without anyone noticing, Heidi started to tiptoe away but Mohinder turned and pointed at her directly, "Heidi! You are the father"

Nathan passed out.