Oh my this is SO random. I don't know where this came from. All the ficlets I've been writing for months, and this poops out in an hour. Oh well.

I sell cigarettes where I work, so from what I've heard, "P-funks" are popular with the almost-twenty's...and total shit. Worst cigarettes. You guys may argue, but that's what I've heard. I've never smoked and I plan on never smoking, but this is just what I've heard. Don't take offense, kay?

PS: I never sent this to my beta (guilt). It was an on-a-whim thing and I really wanted to do something other than homework...and just FINALLY get something uploaded without the baggage and worrying.

Warnings: Smoking, suggested homosexuality

Disclaimer: I obviously don't own anything about Parliament Lights (P-Funks) at all...not even one measly box to call my own (fake tear)

--

Draco Malfoy can remember his first cigarette quite clearly. It was smoked while he was still in Hogwarts, and if you're wondering, NO, it wasn't one of the forbidden items on the long list in Filch's office. In fact, Draco's pretty sure most wizards have never heard of the convenience of a cigarette. Many wizards often smoke pipes, but no one has ever really tried tobacco rolled before. Draco isn't sure about how it works in the muggle world, but when he smoked his first cigarette he felt a change about him. As if he had done something profoundly adult, something that no child could possibly master, except in an attempt of imitation.

Parliament Lights, that was what he had been told they were. And absolute crap. Apparently that was why he had been given one, so that he wouldn't get addicted. And he hadn't. He had gotten addicted to something else entirely about cigarettes.

It had occurred just before the beginning of winter, yet after the close of fall. In that awkward stage of seasons where everything is a mixed blur of brown and grey. Draco had been walking around, looking for someone to harass, when he saw a perfect target. However, something curious was going on and he felt slightly offended by the fact that he was on the out of something that looked so important.

Draco coughed at the blue smoke and asked coolly, "What are you doing?"

He was to be surprised by the amicable response: "Smoking a fag. Crazy little muggle things, they are. Wanna try one?" Thus Draco was tossed a small blue and white box, containing a bunch of the seemingly-precious little rolls. He imitated the other and lit the end with his wand carefully.

He observed his teacher out of the corner of his eye and then began to copy him. Draco sucked in the acrid flavor and breathed it out. He coughed harshly and bellowed as hard as he could with a raspy voice, "What in hell IS this? Did you give it to purposely disgust me?"

Draco's partner laughed, "It's for your own good. Parliament Lights, they are. And absolute crap to get addicted to. Trust me, Malfoy, you don't want this shit in your lungs too often. I'm doing you a favor."

Draco stepped forward and leaned against the tree next to the other, "But you like them?"

"I guess so. They're not so bad when you're hooked."

"Then, Weasley, I guess I'll get hooked too," Draco said defiantly, and sucked in another breath of the poisonous gas, nearly failing to keep his face unaffected.

The redhead looked up grinning, fag hanging out of the corner of his mouth, "Will do. Call me Ron."

And that's why Draco remembers his first cigarette so clearly. It coincides with the day he fell in love with Ron Weasley.

--

Well a part of me thinks it's shit, like P-Funks, and another really likes it's simplicity. I sort of like the abrupt ending...it seems very clean cut. It's damn hard to end these things right.

LET ME KNOW AND REVIEW!