Keep It in the Family
by Bensler
If my name was Dick and I owned them, I'd make them do what I want them to do! Get together NOW. Unfortunately, they aren't mine and I can't make them do anything...except here...in my own fictional fiction!
Chapter 1 - Attention
Even from the doorway where she leaned, quietly watching, she could see his blue eyes sparkle and twinkle with a love so deep, she felt a twinge of pain stab her heart. It was unlikely she would ever know how that kind of love felt. His grin, stretching across his face, was as big and bright as she had ever seen it in the nearly nine years they had been partners. He picked up the young boy he held in his lap and threw him up in the air. The baby's squeals of delight could not help but elicit a big smile and chuckle from Olivia. Eli was now nearly six months old and Elliot seemed so happy whenever Kathy brought him by the precinct. Actually, it was one of the only times he seemed happy.
Standing up, he gave Eli to Kathy. He leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. Olivia had noticed that he always kissed her cheek, or forehead or the top of her head. Never Kathy's lips. She wondered about that every time she saw him kiss her, because in the years past he had always kissed her fully on the lips. And most often a real kiss. They talked quietly a minute and then Kathy turned to leave. It was safe now. She would not be expected to carry on a lengthy coherent conversation with her partner's wife as she was trying to leave, so Olivia headed toward her desk, encountering them on her way.
"Hey, Olivia." Kathy smiled at her.
"Hey, Kathy. Hey, Eli." She grinned, holding her finger out to the baby and he wrapped his chubby fingers around hers. His eyes were the same bright blue as Elliot's.
He smiled and cooed at her, then reached out with both hands for her to take him. Kathy let him go to Olivia. She held him close, Elliot's son, and breathed in his sweet fragrance, a mixture of him and baby powder and lotion and a very faint scent of his father's cologne. She remembered the day of the accident when he had been born. She had seen him before Kathy or Elliot. Touched him before they did. She watched as he reluctantly came into this world, before he was quite ready. She held him close as his mother nearly died. She felt a strange connection to him that she thought would probably always be there. Unbreakable. Just like the one she had with his father.
"Hey, big guy. Aren't you something?" She whispered to him. His skin was so soft on her lips as she placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. She closed her eyes for just a second, taking in everything about him.He squirmed and reached for her necklaces. "Eli, no, no." Kathy lightly popped his hand and went to take him back
"Wow...Eli's really getting big...and heavy." She ran her fingers down a strand of his silken, blonde hair, as Kathy took him into her arms.
Kathy laughed. "Yes, he is. You should come by someday and spend a little time with him. After all, he's here because of you." Kathy searched Olivia's face for some kind of reaction.
"Yea...maybe one day...soon." Olivia replied. They both knew she would never come.
There was no way Olivia could go to the Stabler home and spend time with Eli at the house where Elliot lived. With Kathy. His wife. Where he slept and ate and showered, where his life was lived. His other life. The one where she, Olivia Benson, his partner and best friend, did not have a place. His other world where she did not belong.
"Soon." Kathy repeated.
"Well, I better get to work." Olivia nodded toward her desk.
"And I need to get home. Bye." Kathy continued out of the squad room, Eli looking over her shoulder at Liv.
She glanced at Elliot as she approached her desk. He had watched the whole scene between Liv and Kathy, watched her as she held Eli. His heart bursting at two of the most important people in his life interacting. His partner and his child. She did not know he had taken it all in because now he seemed so engrossed in his work that he did not even look up as she went to sit down. In years past, that would have been unusual because they always knew what the other was doing. They were in one accord, and always, always had to look at one another, talk to one another, cut up, argue, joke, flirt, banter back and forth. Now, most of the time, silence lay heavy between them.
Now, most of the time he barely acknowledged that she was there. Some days she thought he went out of his way to ignore her. Things had gotten a little better since the accident, when she had been largely responsible for saving his wife and newborn son. But, still things were not as easy going between them as they had been two years ago. Two years ago, he had been separated and the forbidden feelings that had been between them for years...the feelings that they had worked so hard to deny, to push away, to ignore...feelings that had always been just below the surface had exploded in fury during the Gitano case. Feelings neither of them had any idea how to handle.
"Did you see Eli and Kathy?" He asked, knowing she had, still not looking up.
"Yes, I did. He's so big and so cute." She smiled and picked up a file.
"Takes after his old man." Elliot joked. He looked at her now, grinning that beautiful full toothed smile of his. She called it the Stabler smile.
"Somehow, I don't think Eli is the least bit conceited." She laughed.
"It's confidence, Benson, not conceit." A smirk now replaced the grin on his face.
She threw a pencil at him and he successfully dodged it.
Elliot paid much more attention to Olivia than she thought. It was just that he had become adept at watching her when she was unaware. He could tell you every outfit she had worn for the last two weeks, describing each in extensive detail. When she had come back from her three month suspension, she had changed everything about herself. Totally.
The long, wavy locks of streaked hair that she pulled into a messy ponytail for work, gave way to a much shorter cut, more her natural hair color with slight streaks of a lighter color woven throughout. The bangs swept to one side and were given to falling over the side of her face hiding her right eye. When ever that happened, which was fairly often, it made Elliot think of the first time he met her. Her hair had been shoulder length and the bangs would fall across her face hiding the same eye, she poking the strands behind her ear each time they fell.
She was gorgeous then and she was even more so now, if that were possible. The overall haircut reminded him of the early years when she cut it so short, it looked like a man's haircut. She never said, but he always thought she had done that in an effort to not look so feminine, to fit better into the man's world she worked in and maybe to seem more imposing to perps. Who knows? Short, long, in between...it made no difference to him because no matter what her hair looked like or what clothes she wore, he found her absolutely, incredibly attractive and sexy.
Her clothing choice had changed, too. Not dramatically, because it was essentially still the same style...she liked the layered look. Her clothing choices were a bit more girly-girl...much more frill and lace. Now instead of layers that covered her up, the layers had become more provocative, more suggestive. Not that they were totally immodest, flaunting in nature or even blatantly revealing, but they did give a rather good hint at what was beneath all those layers. Not that he minded. Except, that is, when he saw other men looking at her, which was quite often. Like nearly every day. Like nearly every man. On occasion, he had even had to stop himself from making a scene when someone got a bit out of hand with a comment and even, once in a while, a touch or an attempt to touch her. Liv, however, could take care of herself and did so without the violence that Elliot leaned toward. She took care of them with biting, slicing words rolling from her sharp tongue, laced with her dry humor and wit.
Another change, since she had been back was one he could not quite put his finger on. She had changed within herself. Her psyche. She was no longer the hysterically funny, sarcastically witty Olivia. She rarely smiled and her uproarious all out laughter he loved to hear, was even more rarely heard. Perhaps, cynical was the word he was looking for to describe her now. Or jaded maybe. She seemed to lack the enthusiasm that colored her personality years ago. As though on some level, she had given up on life. Of course, this job had a way of doing that to people. It seemed that she began to change around the time of Darius Parker's trial.
Or perhaps it was her suspension. She had plenty of time to think about her actions and reasons for doing the job. Or could he have had something to do with these changes? In truth, he knew he did but he did not want to think about it. He knew the changes began when he told her Kathy was pregnant. If he thought about it, he would be forced to face the truth and in turn, have to assume at least some of the blame, the responsibility for these changes in her. Right now, he had almost more blame and responsibility than he could bear. At times, he was very nearly overwhelmed with it. Suffocated by it. So, he simply chose not to think about it, to ignore it instead. He simply chose to watch her and dream from a distance.
Olivia knew that her feelings for Elliot were not healthy. His mere presence demanded her attention and she willingly gave it. There was no way around it. She loved the man. Yes, she loved him as her partner. She loved him as her very best friend. But, the bad thing was, she loved him as a man. She was in love with him in every sense of the word. She wished she could remember when she fell for him, but she could not even remember what her life was before she loved him. Sometimes she thought it was the very first day, the moment they shook hands and she looked into those gorgeous baby blues she felt the oddest sensation...as though she had know him all her life.
That connection had done nothing but become stronger, deeper, more undeniable over the last nearly nine years. It had enmeshed and entangled their hearts, souls and minds, until they were no longer two, but one entity. They finished the other's sentence, a look could ask a question, another look answer it. They had no need for words. Their eyes spoke for them. Entire conversations could exist within the sounds of their silence. They sensed the other's presence even when they had no reason to believe they were near. They knew without asking if something were wrong. At times, it was as though they read the other's mind. It was strange and sometimes eerie, to them as well as outsiders, but it was their hiding place, their solace, their strength.
So, what was wrong with loving someone so completely, so intensely? He was married. He had been separated for two years and the feelings he and Olivia had for one another had nearly destroyed their partnership and friendship. She still was not sure why. It was as though they were both terrified that if they took their relationship to the next level and it did not work out, that they would lose each other completely. Well, they nearly lost each other anyway. He shut her out and she ran. She ran and he shut her out. It was a vicious circle. The divorce papers were signed, but one night after a bad case, he found comfort in his soon to be ex-wife's arms and that one night changed the course of his life...of Olivia's life forever. Kathy became pregnant with their fifth child and Elliot being the honorable man that he is, went back to her when she asked him to come home. Things had been stilted between he and Liv ever since.
She knew that someway she had to let him go. This whatever it was between the two of them...for her own sanity...it had to be over. Soon. Olivia was an extraordinarily beautiful woman. Made even more beautiful by the fact that she seemed truly unaware of the beauty she possessed. She had dated a lot of men in the past and could just about have her pick of men now. Except the only one she wanted. Elliot. In the last few years, she had begun to compare everyone to Elliot and since no one was Elliot, she found something about them she did not like and sent them on their way. On the rare occasions that she dated a man for a lengthy time or seemed too enamored of a particular one, Elliot always seemed to managed to find a way to jam her up in the relationship. Either with jealous outbursts or intimidation or outright sabotage, as in the night he got drunk at a bar where Liv was on a date. He began telling her date that Liv told him she could not wait to get married so she could quit work. It was the last date she had with that guy. It took her nearly a month to speak to Elliot again.
Recently, she had gone out with FBI agent, Dean Porter. He had been her case handler when she pulled an undercover stint in Oregon for the FBI. Dean was a great guy, very handsome with head full of thick, dark brown hair, beautiful brown eyes. Italian. He was a true gentleman, fun to be with, they talked easily, he understood her job and hours because his job entailed the same. Elliot hated him and never missed a chance to make a snide remark about him. They had gone out for several months, but when he started pressuring her for a more serious relationship, she did what she did best. She bolted.
Now, almost three months since Dean, she was beginning to think she needed to get back into the dating scene, even though the thought of doing so did not appeal to her in the least. The only way she would have a chance at the things she wanted would be to meet someone with whom she could have a relationship. When he was separated, she thought Elliot would be the man in her life, but now he was back with Kathy and she had to move on. She still wanted all the things most people did. Someone to love her unconditionally, marriage, children...a real family. A family like she had never known. The unit was the closet thing to a family she had ever had. They took up for each other, encouraged each other and if there were problems, they worked hard on keeping it in the family as they found solutions. They took care of their own. She determined this weekend would be her new starting point for the future. Casey had asked her to go to a friend's wedding with her this weekend and she had agreed. Maybe she would see if there were any potential suitors there.
Olivia was nearly finished getting ready. She had on an elegantly styled halter dress that had a deep V front & diamond heart clip. It was a medium blue with a delicate garden print. The color contrasted wonderfully with her olive complected skin which was deeply tanned from her day at the beach last weekend. It was pleated and full-skirted, falling just above her knees, showing off her trim, well-toned legs. Who would have guessed that all that working out to stay in shape for the department had side perks as well. She was surprised to find that she had some strappy 3-inch heeled sandals that were almost the exact same color as the dress. They finished off her outfit perfectly.
She was supposed to meet Casey at 1:00 in front of the courthouse. Casey had a couple of things that came up and had to take care of them before she left. Checking her makeup and hair one last time, she noticed she had forgotten earrings. Because of the diamond clip she opted for no necklace, but she put on the only real jewelry she had...two tiered diamond studs. A gift from her mother the Christmas before she died. She nodded at her reflection and headed out the door.
Casey read over the medical examiner's report again and asked Elliot if he understood the ramifications of the DNA from both their suspect and the victim's husband being found on the gun at the crime scene. He said he did, but she wanted to go over the questions she would ask him Monday in court one more time.
"Okay. I think you'll be fine. Just remember...answer the questions, mine as well as the defending attorney's, in as few words as possible and do not..." She coached him.
"Do not give them anything extra to work with...I know, I know, Casey. I've been doing this for nearly twenty years." Elliot rolled his eyes at her.
"You're right...sorry...just want everything to go well." She looked at her watch. "Oh, my goodness. I have got to go or we will be late for the wedding!" She threw the files in her drawer, locked her desk, grabbed her pocketbook and stepped out of her office.
Elliot locked and closed the door behind them. "Who's wedding...I know you told me..."
"A friend of mine from law school, Anise Shiver. She and I clerked at the same firm our second year." She hit 'L' for Lobby and the elevator closed.
"By the way...you look really great, Case." He smiled at her
"Thank you, Elliot." She smiled back. She had on a simple, but elegant, sleeveless dress of yellow silk and a shear lace that covered it along with a matching jacket.
"So...who's the 'we'? Some hot date?" He winked at her as the doors opened and they stepped into the lobby.
Casey laughed. "I'll let you decide if my date's 'hot' or not..."
"Hey...this door does not swing both ways..." He warned her, shaking his head.
"Well, take a look and let me know anyway...there's my date now." She nodded at the person sitting on the bench just inside the courthouse doors.
Elliot felt the breath leave his body as his heart ceased beating. Olivia. She looked like she had just stepped out of a fashion magazine. She was sitting up very straight with her long, legs crossed, her hands folded in her lap. He had seen her dressed up before and should not have been so taken aback by this vision that appeared before him now, but he was nearly speechless.
This must be a new a dress or at least one she had never worn around him. She favored blacks and reds and occasionally dark greens. This was a medium blue with some kind of flowers on it and the color was enhanced by her golden tan. He knew she had been to the beach last weekend and could tell she had gotten a good bit of sun when he had seen her this week at work. But seeing her now, her arms, shoulders, back and legs bare, he was stunned. She was absolutely gorgeous from her short chestnut hair, purposefully tousled, to the sexy sandals with straps wrapping around her ankles that matched her dress.
Casey could feel Elliot tense and she knew he liked what he saw. She watched him from the corner of her eye as he started sucking air like he could not breathe. Then she watch him quickly attempt to cover his reaction and act smooth and unfazed by the woman in front of him. He and Liv had been partners and best friends for nearly nine years. Their relationship was not without problems and from time to time they hit rough patches and right now they were in, probably the roughest patch yet. But, somehow, they always managed to maintain that uncanny bond, an almost supernatural connection that people picked up on almost as soon as you met the two of them. It was the best kept secret of the NYPD that Olivia and Elliot had some kind of thing between them that mere words could not define. Right now Casey was doing her own assessment and she was eager to see just how Elliot would respond in this situation.
Liv heard them talking and looked up to face them. When she saw it was Casey and Elliot, she stood up and smoothed down her dress. She was beautiful.
"Hey, Casey. Was about to call your office..." She told her.
"I wanted to go over the questions just one more time..." She explained. "Olivia...that dress is amazing. You look incredible!"
"Oh...thanks...someone with great fashion taste helped me pick it out..." She smiled at Casey, who had insisted on Liv buying this dress the week before last on their trip to the mall.
Liv then glanced at Elliot and smiled, almost shy about seeing him. Well, seeing him when she was dressed so...so...unprofessionally. "Hey, Elliot. Didn't know you were Casey's last minute thing..."
"Yea...well, we got it done and now you two can be off to your wedding and I can go watch the Yankees on TV." He smiled at both of them and started toward the door. "By the way, nice dress, Liv."
She raised her eyebrows at him. "Oh...yea...thanks." She wondered why he had to be so short and curt when he talked to her. She missed the easy banter between them of the years past.
He held the door for them to leave. Liv went out first and as Casey passed Elliot, she leaned close to him and whispered in his ear. "Nice dress?" She snorted. Running up the steps of the courthouse was Trevor Langan, one of the defense attorneys that SVU worked with, dressed in shorts and a tank top. He was a very handsome man, medium brown hair with just a bit of lighter steaks in it, beautiful green eyes. Well built and very tall, he towered over everyone at 6'5", maybe even 6'6". Olivia used to hate him, but seven months ago when she was forced to work closely with him on a case, she had actually gotten to know him as a person rather than an attorney who defended the scum they arrested. She found that as a person he was really a great guy. She had even gone out with him a few times, but they just didn't click. Not that way. He was not Elliot. They still caught lunch or dinner together every now and then.
"Well, well, well. I must say I feel slightly underdressed. Although, I fit right in at the park for my run. Must be something special going on for you ladies to be dressed up like this on a Saturday morning." He grinned at both of them and then looked over at Elliot and nodded. "Stabler."
"Friend's wedding." Casey told him.
"Well, I hope the bride is a good sport because she is going to have some tough competition. That yellow dress just compliments your golden hair and beautiful blues eyes perfectly. You look gorgeous, Casey." He reached out and fingered a strand of her hair.
"Well, thank you, Trevor. I'd return the compliment but..." Casey said with her usual dry humor, as she pulled her hair from his hand. He wanted to date Casey, but she was not interested.
He laughed and turned to Liv. He ran his hand down her right arm to pick up her hand and turn her around. "And you, my lady...that blue is amazing against your tanned complexion. The whole outfit...wow, Liv...you are absolutely stunning." His smile was sincere.
Elliot nearly choked when Trevor touched Liv and took her hand. That she did not seem to have a problem with it, bothered him even more. Elliot hated that, because he and Liv had this unspoken rule between them. They did not touch. He wondered about that sometimes...how it ever fell into place. It happened early on and he knew it was mutual. Maybe one day he would get up the nerve to ask Liv about it. Yea, right. Not in this lifetime.
Olivia felt the heat rushing to her face and knew she was blushing. "Oh, Trevor, those are such sweet things to say. Thank you." She flashed her trademark smile of straight white teeth. She did not normally blush like this and she was sure it was because Elliot was there and had, in effect, brushed off her new dress and how she looked. She glanced at over at him. To the average spectator, he seemed perfectly normal. But Olivia, saw his slightly narrowed eyes and the subtle twitching of his jaw. He was barely holding back the anger she felt coming from him and she was pretty sure it was prompted by Trevor's compliments and touches. Well, he needed to get over it. He went back to Kathy and she was on her way to moving on.
Elliot could not remember the last time she had smiled like that for him. He loved that smile and suddenly he realized how much he missed it. He also could not believe Olivia blushed! Olivia Benson does not blush!"If you ladies need an escort, I have a suit in my office...give me ten minutes to shower..." He wiggled his eyebrows at them suggestively.
They laughed and so did he. Elliot tried to laugh, but never really succeeded. He could not believe how Trevor laid it on so thick with the compliments. Even harder to believe was how they both seemed to love it. They were not acting like the women he worked with and knew.
Casey and Liv left for the wedding. Trevor and Elliot stood there on the steps watching as they drove off. Elliot was not real fond of Trevor for the same reason Liv had not liked him. He defended the perps they worked so hard to get off the streets. He also had a personal reason for disliking Trevor. He could not stand anyone who dated Olivia. The thought of Trevor touching her, kissing her, being with her, turned his stomach and made him want to land a well placed punched in his gut or to the middle of his face. Or both. As they stood there now, his fists were involuntarily clenching and unclenching.
"Stabler, you are one lucky man." Trevor shook his head as he looked at Elliot.
"What makes you say that, Langan?" Elliot asked.
"You get to spend eight plus hours a day, day in and day out, with a knock-out bombshell for a partner. Olivia Benson is easily the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen. And one of the nicest. And Casey...she's beautiful! How do you stand it?" He slapped Elliot on the back and ran into the courthouse.
'Yea...well, I'm married and...well...I'm married.' Elliot thought to himself, as he dragged his hands over his face and headed for his car. Thoughts of Olivia began to fill his mind and he knew he might spend the afternoon in front of the television with the Yankees game blaring, but he knew his mind would be somewhere other than the ball game. His attention would be held captive by one absolutely stunning, deeply tanned, brown haired, brown eyed detective, in an amazing blue dress, with a tantalizing smile. And in his thoughts, she would be smiling for him. Only him.
A/N: Okay, gang! Here's a new story with a new twist...I promise! You know the drill! If you read my story, I love ya! If you read and review, I know ya love me! And then I will be forced to write more...and sooner to maintain that love! Seriously, I appreciate all the time and effort it takes to review and I am open to suggestions for making the story better or improving the style or whatever. I have so many ideas tumbling in my head! Thanking you ahead of time for your faithfulness! " ) Bensler