Quiet in the Rough
Fandom: xxxHolic
Series: The Taming of the April Fool
If there was one thing Doumeki Shizuka believed in, it was that one could never impose his or her feelings on another person. It didn't change the way he felt inside, his capacity to feel, but it seemed best and most productive to remain in control of them. To show one's emotions meant to affect others and so he hid them.
His family, classmates, teachers and so forth all seemed to think well of him because of that, his 'Live and Let Live' way of things, and praised him for it. They commented on how well he suited his own name; Shizuka –peaceful; calm. And it was with his calm that he turned girls down when they asked him out. It was with his calm he concentrated on his archery targets, with it he took each day as it came, and with it he bore the trials thrown his way.
Now if only he could keep that calm, and continue not to impose his feelings on one Watanuki Kimihiro then everything would be perfect.
But no.
Instead of his usual calm and collected manners, his poker-faced countenance or his usual methodical logic… he was instead saddled with worry, found himself unable to resist smirking, and while he retained most of his logic, he often lost most of it to anger in his concern for Watanuki's well-being. After he got over being annoyed about those things, he decided it was probably best to accept it. He couldn't change much about it, anyway, helplessly prodding at Watanuki if only just to watch the younger man reduce himself to a fit of spit and sparks. And besides, the little fool had the cutest blush…
Well, that explained why he'd never been interested in girls.
It was trading one problem for another, however. Because while he had answers to some of his questions, those had only been replaced with more questions. Such as, would Watanuki possibly entertain the idea of attraction to him in return?
He really tried not to think about that. But Himawari-chan, for all her naïve ignorance and polite disregard of Watanuki's squealing adoration, seemed to sense that he and Watanuki belonged together. She encouraged them to be together. She would give Watanuki her sincerest apologies every time she couldn't accompany him on meetings or errands for Yuuko, and before turning away would throw 'Doumeki-kun' a cheery and rather knowing smile. Even he, as sharp as he usually was, couldn't have initially said she did these things on purpose.
So when he did figure it out, he would smile for her in appreciative thanks.
And if Watanuki flew into a flailing rage over it, well that was just a bonus.
He just peaceably observed. Remained calm. Because regardless of all the ways Watanuki shred down his guard and rearranged his personality or shook up his life, Shizuka was still very good at keeping calm after all.
TBC