A/N: I'm not thrilled with this. I wrote the good parts when I was half asleep.
Date Originally
Posted: 2/16/2008
Title: Tamaki's Grand and
Spectacular Commoners' Slumber Party
Series: Ouran High
School Host Club
Rating: PG
Characters: Entire
Host Club
Pairing: None.
Spoilers: None.
Word
Count: 1,960
BETA: Siv-chan
DISCLAIMER: Ouran isn't mine. Yamashima is though. And any other mentions of people you don't know. But they're not important to the story.
Tamaki's Grand and Spectacular Commoners' Slumber Party
Haruhi stared apprehensively at the colorful envelope that was thrust in her face.
"Haruhi! Your devoted father lovingly bestows this heartfelt invitation to you!" Tamaki announced loudly. "Open it! Open it!"
The girl warily accepted the envelope and opened it. As she took out the paper, a handful of glitter and confetti spilled out. This seemed to make Tamaki even more excited. After scanning the paper, Haruhi crumpled it and bluntly said, "No."
This, of course, sent Tamaki fleeing to his Corner of Woe.
"I'll decrease your debt by a third if you consent," Kyoya whispered in Haruhi's ear.
She whirled around, startled. "Kyoya! Where did you come from?"
"I was under the assumption that you knew about procreation," Kyoya replied dryly.
"AH! Mother! Stop harassing our daughter!"
"Even if I wanted to agree to this (which I don't), I highly doubt my father (my real father) would agree to this."
"Oh, but Ranka-san already has," Kyoya said.
"Eh?"
"I spoke to him about this earlier when he phoned. Wasn't that convenient, Haruhi?" Kyoya smiled.
'Damn rich bastard,' Haruhi thought. "Alright! Fine,"
"Yay! Tamaki hopped happily around the room before accidentally knocking a plate of cake to the floor. The entire room froze as Hunny stood in shock; then gazed in horror as the small boy's eyes turned bright red and feral.
"I'm sorry, Hunny-senpai!"
The rest of the week passed quickly and soon it was Friday. Haruhi unwillingly found herself standing outside the Suoh mansion number two. She took a few deep breaths before raising her hand to knock.
The door swung open and a uniformed man stood there. "Welcome Fujioka-san. The young master and his friends are all upstairs. Please entrust your things to Mine-san," he said, indicating the maid beside him." She will put them away for you. Please follow me."
Dazed, Haruhi did as he said. She then trailed along behind the butler. The pair went up the stairs, turned left, then a right, then some other directions in which Haruhi didn't pay any attention. Finally they reached a long hallway. At the last door the butler knocked twice.
"Fujioka-san has arrived," he said.
"Okay! Send her in!" came the reply. The butler bowed slightly to Haruhi and then opened the door for her.
"Welcome to Tamaki's Grand and Spectacular Commoners' Slumber Party!" the blond boy cried as he danced into view.
"Isn't that an oxymoron?" Kaoru whispered to his brother.
"Ah but Tono is a moron," Hikaru answered.
Haruhi gaped at her fellow club members, "What are you wearing?"
"Do you like them? Do you? There's a pair especially for you!" Tamaki grinned as he swept up a silky pink confection trimmed in lace.
Haruhi could only stare at the boys in their sleepwear. Tamaki wore a white pajama set with dogs printed all over them. Hunny sat cheerfully eating cake while clad in a lilac set with pink bunnies. Beside him sat Mori looking out of place in his pair decorated with yellow chicks on a green background. The twins sat passively on the floor in their black pajamas with bright flames licking at the cuffs.
The girl feared for her life (and her debt sum) as her eyes shifted to Kyoya who looked murderous in pale blue pajamas with yellow smiling bees and flowers randomly placed. Haruhi sidled away from the corner that he sat in as it seemed to be much colder there than in the rest of the room.
"Haruhi! You should go change into this!" Tamaki cried while waving the pink pajamas in her face.
"No," she said flatly. "No way. I have my own pajamas. Where did the maid take my bag?"
At Haruhi's refusal, Tamaki revisited his beloved Corner of Woe. However, he did perk up when she inquired about the location of her bag.
"Haruhi! Come see the room you're going to be sleeping in! Your bags in there too! Don't worry. Your room has been place right across from mine. Feel free to seek refuge there if you have any frightening dreams!"
"Let's go Haruhi!" the twins cheered as they violently shoved Tamaki away from her.
Tamaki finally caught up to the rest of the group by the time they reached the end of the hallway. He took over leading the rest of the way since he knew the way to the room Haruhi was to use.
"Here we are! This is the exquisite room that Haruhi shall be using!" Tamaki sang out as he flung open the door.
"Wah!" Hunny squealed as he ran into the room. "Haru-chan gets to use a canopy bed!"
"Nice pictures, Tono," the twins smirked as they examined the framed finger-painting of what appeared to be a colorful unicorn or a blob with various appendages sticking off it.
"S-shut up!"
Haruhi walked into the room. She promptly walked over to a wall and took down a large portrait of Tamaki which had the words "Sweet dreams, my darling daughter" scribbled across the top. She then carried the picture over to the closet door and shoved it inside. Tamaki wept profusely.
"Out," Haruhi commanded. The twins moved to encircle Haruhi with their arms.
"Shall we help you change?" they chorused.
Tamaki let out a shriek of indignation. "Mother! Mother! Those devil children are harassing our only daughter again!"
"Ne, Haru-chan should come back to the other room when she's done changing!" Hunny smiled as he pulled Mori out of the room.
"Yes! I recently viewed Yamashima-san's instructional yet entertaining video of how to throw a-" Tamaki was cut off as Hikaru and Kaoru shoved him out the door. Kyoya quietly followed the noisy trio and shut the door behind himself.
Haruhi sighed before looking around for her bag. She finally found it neatly folded at the foot of the bed. It was obviously empty. Frowning, she looked around the room, wondering where he clothes and other necessities were. She opened a door only to find that it led to an adjoining bathroom. Inside, Haruhi found her toothbrush, toothpaste, contact lens supplies, and other items placed beside the sink.
She exited the bathroom and looked around the room. She noticed the dresser/mirror set and walked over to it. Her comb and spare glasses sat atop it. Upon opening the drawers, Haruhi found all her clothes tidily placed inside.
Haruhi pulled out the ratty oversized t-shirt that used to be her father's along with a pair of flannel pants. She quickly undressed and put on her nightclothes. Once redressed, she padded into the bathroom to remove her contacts.
A sharp knock came at the door. Haruhi donned her glasses and went to answer the door. She was surprised to see Mori standing there.
"Mitsukuni was concerned that you would get lost," he explained. He didn't need to verbally explain that the twins and Tamaki had fought over who would go retrieve her.
Oh. Well thank you. I guess I'm ready to back then," Haruhi smiled up at Mori. They stepped out the door and made their way to the others. As Mori opened that door, the sounds of scuffling could be heard.
"Haruhi! Let father see your adorable nightwear! Haru-eeeek!" shrieked Tamaki. "Mother! What is our daughter wearing?! Why must our child wear such burlap and sackcloth?!"
Haruhi ignored Tamaki and instead chose to go sit by Hunny (and his cake) on the couch. She accepted the piece of cake that was offered to her.
Once recovered, Tamaki pulled out a piece of paper and began to read. "Welcome all to Tamaki's Grand and Spectacular Commoners' Slumber Party! First we shall all give each other makeovers! Complete with hair and makeup!"
He was met with blank stares.
"Ah, maybe a game? Yes! We shall play 'Bloody Mary'! Hikaru, go into the bathroom and chanted "Bloody Mary" thrice!" Tamaki order while dramatically jabbing his finger at the twin.
However, both of the twins had moved behind the couch that Haruhi sat on to play with her hair.
A knock came at the door. "Sir. The evening meal as arrived," the butler called. After Tamaki gave the word, the door opened and in walked three maids, each carrying a pizza box on a silver tray. The hired help set down the boxes on a table and quickly left the room.
"Look at how greasy this is," Hikaru exclaimed.
"Why a cardboard box?" Kaoru asked.
"Why don't commoner's just their personal chefs to make them pizza?"
"Or go to Italy?"
'Damn rich bastards,' Haruhi mentally cursed.
Expensive plates were then passed out to each person along with a crystal goblet filled with soda by Tamaki. Haruhi tried her best to avoid breaking anything. The meal was soon finished and the used dishes and uneaten pizza was whisked away by the maid.
"Oh! Haru-chan! Let's watch this movie!" Hunny exclaimed while waving a DVD in her face.
"Yes!" Tamaki agreed. "We shall now partake in the viewing of the movie! Yamashima-san suggested that a lighthearted romantic comedy was perfect for this type of thing!"
"Tama-chan, who is Yamashima-san?" Hunny inquired.
Tamaki pulled out another DVD case and proudly displayed it. "Yamashima Kagura-san's instructional video for throwing a wonderful slumber party!"
The twins promptly began to tease Tamaki while laughing. Kyoya adjusted his glasses before scribbling something in his notebook. "Tamaki. Did it ever occur to you that Yamashima's movie was intended for females?"
Tamaki blinked in confusion. "Mother, are you saying that we can not play dress up or talk about boys?"
Hikaru and Kaoru laughed even harder while Kyoya shook his head.
"Stop!" Tamaki wailed. He grabbed Haruhi by the arm and hauled her up. "We shall play the commoner's game of flashlight tag in the mansion!"
Intrigued, the twins agreed to this activity. The rest were quick to follow. Tamaki informed the mansion staff that they were going to play the game. A maid came forth with a silver tray. Laying on it were flashlights. Most of the lights in the house were then quickly turned off. Tamaki proclaimed himself It.
Tamaki quickly found everyone and the duo of Mori and Hunny were next to be It. After them were Hikaru and Kaoru. Then it was Kyoya's turn.
Haruhi wandered around on the second floor. She came to a door and opened it. It was the room she was to use for the evening. Shrugging she climbed into the bed and quickly fell asleep.
Once the boys found her slumbering, they decided to leave her alone. Okay, so Hikaru and Kaoru wished to crawl in the bed with her but were quickly beaten back by Tamaki.
The boys decided that they would spread out their futons and watch a movie. An action video was popped in even though no one really watched it. Hunny tucked away an entire cake as Mori looked on. The twins played their handheld video game while Kyoya typed at his laptop.
"Kyoya, ask me truth or dare," Tamaki whispered as he poked his friend in the arm.
"No,"
"Please!"
"Fine. Truth or dare?"
"Dare,"
"... Now what?"
"Kyoya! You're supposed to dare me to do something!"
"I dare you to give me all your stocks in exchange for a ramen cup," Kyoya stated.
"… I don't want to play anymore," Tamaki whimpered. He then crawled over to his futon and fell asleep.
Hikaru and Kaoru noticed this and took it upon themselves to draw on Tamaki's face. With a permanent marker. Snickering, they retired to their futon and also fell asleep. One by one the rest of the Host Club all succumbed to sleep.
The morning dawned and Haruhi was out the door as fast as she could, vowing never to return.
A/N: Like I previously mentioned… I'm not entirely thrilled with it. The ending's rushed. A lot of things were skipped. I should just be happy I wrote something.
By the way. I am currently wearing pale blue pajama pants with yellow smiling bees and flowers.