Title: It's No Big Deal, Right?

Fandom: The O.C.

Author: Blood White Panther (aka whitepanther16)

Pairing(s): Ryan/Seth innuendo, mentions of multiple het pairings, no actual sex occurs

Rating/Warnings: This has an M (or R) rating for mature themes, mentions of het sexual pairings, mentions of masturbation, denial, inappropriate touching, and slash themes. This has not been beta-ed.

Notes: Set somewhere around season 2, episode 14-15. It's kinda TWT because here Ryan and Lindsay are over and Seth and Summer aren't together. Actually, I just found the perfect spot in the timeline: S2E23, which is funny because I hadn't even seen that episode yet when I wrote this. My story would kick in right around the time when Seth gets up at about 5:30 am and sneaks out to the pool house to pester Ryan about Summer, Zach, and Prom. I squealed like a hyperactive thirteen-year-old when they made my stuff so close to canon. Appropriate adjustments have been made. :)

Disclaimer: I don't own anything that is recognizable from The O.C., and I'm not making any money off of this.

xxxxx

Sometimes Ryan likes to give up control. He's the tough guy. The rebel known by "Chino" who would kick your ass as soon as look at you. He likes to think about charming girls out of their panties and fucking them otherwise fully clothed, quick and dirty up against a brick wall in a bathroom or an alleyway. He likes to think about having Marissa under him, small and soft and submissive. About making love to her until she's trembling with the gentle force of it. Sometimes, though, he likes to think about Lindsay. Lindsay, meeting him quip for quip. Lindsay, challenging him. Lindsay, getting on top of him and riding his cock until all he can do is pant and tremble with the thrill of giving up, giving in, giving over control. And sometimes, alone in the pool house, in the middle of the night and the privacy of the dark, he likes to think about Seth. Seth looming over him and pushing him back against a wall. Seth holding him down. Seth fucking him.

Seth isn't as strong as Ryan or as versed in fighting, but he's taller. He's quick and his arms and legs are longer. Ryan likes to think that, under the right circumstances, with the right momentum and the right leverage, Seth could pin him. He imagines having some one bigger than him and close to his own weight on top of him, pinning him to the mattress and just taking what he wants. He wraps his own hand around his dick and imagines it's Seth.

Ryan has gotten a little caught up in his fantasy. He hasn't remembered to stop, get up, pull the blinds and lock the door before takes himself in hand. He also doesn't notice when said door swings open.

xxxxx

Seth can't sleep. Lately, when he gets bored, he starts to wax reminiscently about his time with Summer and wrack his brains for a way to get her back. Then he feels depressed and morose and stares blankly into space for hours on end. If he thinks about Summer right now, he's not going to get any sleep tonight anyway. He sighs and glances at his digital alarm clock. The display reads 5:27 am. Make that this morning. He sighs again, sits up, and swings his legs over the side of the bed. It looks like he isn't to get any sleep anyway, and he can't just stay here: alone in the dark.

As he enters the kitchen and moves to get some water from the tap, he glances out the window. His eyes land on the pool house. If anyone can get him out of this funk, it's Ryan, but Ryan is probably asleep. It's not even six in the morning, but he decides to check anyway.

Seth turns the doorknob as quietly as possible. He doesn't want to wake Ryan. Well, he does, but he wouldn't actually do it. Probably. Actually, he's totally going to wake up Ryan so he can talk about Summer and Zach and Prom, he just doesn't want to admit it yet. He slides the door open a crack and peers into the black room. He squints and thinks he sees movement.

"Seh-ettthhhh Hhh…"

It's a broken sort of moan, all breathy and quiet, and it sounds an awful lot like Seth's name. He stands there, in shock, and listens to the slap of Ryan's hand on his cock. His own hand falls from the doorknob to hang limply at his side and the door swings open and bangs lightly against the wall. Neither of them notices.

The minutes tick by.

Seth's been standing frozen in the doorway for so long now that his eyes are beginning to adjust to the dark. Ryan moans out something that sounds like "Harder!" and Seth starts and realizes that he is now officially watching his best friend spend a little time with Han Solo.

Seth has always been aware in a detached, indirect sort of way that Ryan is good looking. In fact, he's spent hours pondering the concept of whether hanging out with Ryan is more likely to get him some seriously hot cast-offs, or to make it so that any girl he notices will always be striving to upgrade. It's completely different to be aware of Ryan's body in a direct sort of way. In a way that makes his mouth dry and his palms sweaty and his pants tight. A way that makes him, Seth Cohen, speechless. Like he used to get when Summer took off her shirt.

There are a lot of things Seth should be remembering right now. He should be remembering that Ryan is his best friend. He should be remembering that Summer broke his heart again and he deserved it, and that Ryan's still obsessed with Marissa. He should be remembering that ever since his parents had adopted the wayward kid from Chino, Ryan has officially been his brother. And he should really be remembering that he, Seth Cohen, is straight. True to his delinquent nature, Ryan seems to break all these rules: Seth can't look away.

"God, yeah, Seth!" And then Seth is officially watching his best friend shoot his load.

xxxxx

"Look, man, it's not a big deal," says Ryan gruffly.

"Not a big deal!? You think about me when you come!"

"I think about a lot of different people."

"I don't know what it's like in Chino, well, I mean I've heard things, and I get that it's kinda a dirty underbelly—with teenaged pregnancies and drugs and car theft—and didn't you actually steal a car once?"

"Seth!"

"Right. Er, as I was saying before you interrupted me," Ryan gives him a quelling look at this, "I don't know how it is in Chino, but in Orange County, allegedly straight guys don't think about their allegedly straight, male best friends when they jerk off!" Ryan smirks.

"You're only allegedly straight?"

"That's not what I meant, I was only trying for a politically correct—hey, don't try to change the subject! My sexuality is not the issue, here. The issue is that you think I'm hot!" He pauses for a moment as though something he's just said has surprised him, and then a wide grin begins to creep across his face.

"Resident badass Ryan Atwood thinks I'm hot! I always knew I was irresistible. Summer, Anna, Alex—everyone wants to fuck me at some point. Even you," and Seth proceeds to poke Ryan in the chest. He looks smug. And maybe a little giddy. Ryan starts to worry Seth is going to do a happy dance.

"You think I'm sexyyy. You want to daaate me." Yep, he's starting to dance. Just as Ryan feels a twitch coming on, Seth sobers up and stops taunting.

"Even if I am extraordinarily attractive, it's still a pretty big issue that you think about me when you spank the monkey. Monkey. Heh, you know, I always thought that was kind of a weird euphemism—not to mention a highly disturbing image if you take it literally—maybe I should have said beat the meat? Actually, speaking of meat, I think I'm going to make a sandwich once we sort this out, did you want anything?" Ryan actually does twitch this time. He sighs and sits down on the steps.

"Look, man, get over yourself. So I thought about you tonight. Yesterday I thought about Marissa. Sometimes I still think about Lindsay. Fuck, I even think about Theresa every once and a while." Seth crosses the room to sit a step down from Ryan.

"Ah, Ry-man, I don't know if you've noticed—well, actually, if you think about me when you do that I guess it's a pretty safe bet that you have—but thinking about me is a little different."

"Why?" he deadpans.

"First of all, I'm not some hot chick with big tits. I have a dick."

"Maybe sometimes that's what I want…"

Seth nearly falls off the step. At this point, it shouldn't be a surprise, but to hear it phrased so baldly… And now Ryan is squirming a little, and he isn't exactly meeting Seth's eyes anymore. Throughout this whole awkward thing, Ryan has faced him head on, seemingly without shame, embarrassment, or self-consciousness. Now, though, his confidence seems to be fading.

"Does that- Is that going to be an issue for you?" he quietly asks. Seth moves up a step so he's equal with Ryan and awkwardly puts an arm around his shoulder.

"Naw. I mean, not one I can't get over. I lived with Luke and his Dad for the whole summer, remember? And I dated Alex, but that's a little different again-"

"Yeah. Uh, Seth?"

"What is it, bro?" Again Seth seems to have surprised himself. He wrinkles his nose and absently withdraws his arm from Ryan's neck. "Actually, that brings up a whole new issue. You do remember that my parents adopted you, don't you?" Ryan grins mildly.

"It's not the kind of thing you forget."

"And you don't notice a problem with that?"

"Nothing comes to mind."

"We're basically brothers!"

"So what? Actually, no, I think it is important. It makes it hotter. Lindsay and I really used to get off on the whole incest taboo thing. You'd be surprised how often you can work it into a conversation-"

"Ack! Stop it. Now is not the time for you to suddenly become verbose. Anyway, what were you going to tell me a minute ago?"

"Oh. That. Do you- Do you think maybe you can try to keep this to yourself?"

"Suddenly it's a big deal? I thought it didn't mean anything?"

"It doesn't. For you. I think about lots of people, and it doesn't mean I'd want to sleep with all of them. I don't want to jump you. And as far as our friendship goes, it doesn't change anything. I'm still going to treat you like a brother."

"Then what's the problem?"

"…"

"Ryan?"

"Look, I don't think it has to be a big deal that I was thinking about you specifically. But it might be a big deal that I was thinking about a guy at all."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Don't worry about it, Ryan, my brother, my man. I'll put it in the vault." Ryan thinks about other secrets Seth had tried to keep. He thinks about Seth's mouth running away from him at a mile a minute, like it always does.

"I'm doomed," he mutters resignedly.

"Shut up, I can keep a secret. At least, as long as no one asks me outright. You haven't been checking out anyone at school have you? No? No one on the water polo team?"

"Seth," he delivers in a clipped tone accompanied with a pointed glare.

"Fine, I'm dropping it. Oh, and I wasn't worried you were going to jump my bones." Ryan feels a vaguely ominous pull in his gut. This is going to turn into a gibe-fest or a shouting match somehow. Maybe there's some way to avoid it? Maybe Seth will drop the subject if I play up my boredom with the topic?

"Oh?" he tries to sound disinterested.

"Yeah, I mean, you'd want me to be the one doing the jumping. Never took you for a bottom-boy, Ryan. But you were all, like, "God, yeah, Seth!" and "Harder!" If I'd ever stopped to think about it, what with your tough-guy, rabble-rouser attitude and all, I'd of expected-"

Ryan can admit to himself that he likes to think about Lindsay riding him. He can admit that he sometimes wants to be overpowered. On a good day, and if he doesn't have to look himself in the mirror, he can even admit that he's curious about other guys. It's another thing entirely to admit out loud that he wants to take a cock up his ass. His pseudo-heterosexual manly pride is at stake, here, and he knows he has to respond accordingly! He stands up to tower over Seth.

"I didn't say that! You're making it up. You would totally be the one taking it if we had sex!"

xxxxx

Luke is really excited. He finally has the chance to visit his friends in Orange County! He knows he's getting into town really early, though, so he decides to see if he can crash with Ryan in the pool house for a couple hours before he drops in unannounced on his mom. At least this way he won't even bother Mister and Missus Cohen. He has just snuck into the back yard, quietly opened the door to the pool house, and opened his mouth to call out an enthusiastic greeting when he hears Ryan shouting, "You would totally be the one taking it if we had sex!" He backs out of the room, closes the door, and stands there numbly for a minute or two. Is everybody gay, now!? Sighing and shaking his head, Luke heads back towards the front yard. Maybe he can still catch his taxi. His mom is a bit much to take this early in the morning, but it has to be better than this. Can anyone say awkward?

xxxxx

Neither one of the boys notices the brief interruption. And Ryan immediately starts to regret jumping to his feet, because now Seth is standing up, too. And looming over him like he's going to start something. Something that Ryan's cock seems to hope it isn't going to be a fistfight. And then Seth gets a wicked sort of gleam in his eye and Ryan really starts to sweat.

"No. I don't think so, Ry," is Seth's witty rejoinder. And then he's backing Ryan into the nearest wall and trapping him there with a palm flat on the wall on either side of Ryan's face and leaning in to nuzzle and breathe hotly against Ryan's neck before he whispers low and taunting into his ear, "I could have you begging for it." Ryan feels his eyelids flutter. God. He's never been so hard before in his whole damn life. Turns out Seth wouldn't need much for manpower to make him submit. He briefly wonders what happened to 'It's not a big deal' and 'I don't want to jump you'? Seth trails a hand down Ryan's chest, abs, lower and Ryan's thoughts fly out the window. He squeezes inquisitively at Ryan's erection and is rewarded with a highly embarrassing whimper.

And just like that the angry, dominant Seth is gone and regular Seth is straightening up and smiling at Ryan and his eyes are dancing and he's backing away.

"I told you'd take it. I'm going to go have that sandwich—I'm thinking pickles. Did you ever wonder why pickles have those tiny little bumps all over them?" And then he's across the room, walking with the usual spring in his step, and opening the door. "Later, man."

"Y-yeah. Later." Ryan sinks to the ground. Fuck.

xxxxx

Seth is sitting on a barstool in the kitchen, eating his pickle sandwich at the counter. He thinks he's really going to like messing with Ryan's head. He doesn't realize just how much he's going to like until a few days later, when he's staring at his bedroom ceiling. He's thinking about backing Ryan into another wall, just to screw with his head, when he realises he's absently stroking a hand over the budge in his pyjama pants, and holly fucking shit, when did that get there? He wrenches his hand up above the covers and determinedly represses the memory of getting half hard listening to Ryan say his name like that while he jerked off. He's also careful not to think about palming Ryan's cock through his sweat pants just to prove a point.

An hour later, Seth wonders what point he's trying to prove, exactly. It's 2:30 in the morning and he's still a little bit hard and he desperately needs some sleep. Ryan said it didn't mean anything, didn't change anything. Seth swallows. Hard. He snakes his hands under the covers and pulls down his pyjamas down past his thighs. Ryan said it's no big deal, right? Ryan. Seth's eyes fall to half-mast as he wraps his right hand around his dick. He squeezes hard and pumps slow and painful, exactly like he watched Ryan do it. God. Seth bites his lip until he tastes blood. Ryan on his back, jacking himself and calling Seth's name. Ryan changing, bare-chested and ripped. Ryan wrestling him for the remote control. Ryan backed against a wall, hard for Seth and—oh God—whimpering. Ryan leaping to his defence, throwing a mean right hook. Ryan beating him at Star Wars: Jedi Knight. Ryan wrestling him in the pool, slippery and wet in just their swim trunks. Ryan getting mad at him, his voice going all deep and dangerous. The smell of Ryan's sweat-salty skin when Seth leaned down to nuzzle his neck. Ryan calling out "God, yeah, Seth!" and coming all over himself. Fuck. And Seth is coming, too.

Seth lays awake for awhile longer, wondering if it's weird that he just came harder into his own fist than he ever came inside Summer. Ryan said it's no big deal, right? Eventually, in the last vestiges of his afterglow, Seth falls asleep. It's 2:43 am on a school night.