-1Dear gawd, I havent updated anything in a while…(hangs head in shame) It's hard though, because when you procrasinate on stuff as long as I do, and then when you come back to it, well… I just feel weird and twitchy…don't ask…
Shikamaru: Do I ever appear in this fic…or any of your fics for that matter?
Me: Srry…I have forgotten about you, haven't I?
Shikamaru: All the troublesome ppl get all the attention.
Me: Well, that's just how it is these days.(turns on 'Accident' by Baha Men) ADDICTING!
Shikamru: How troublesome…
-This is sad…-
Okay, so a few days pass, and Hinata's really come along in the confidence department.
Oprah: Hinata, what do you want more than anything?
Hinata: I don't know…maybe for Naruto to notice me…
Oprah: Well, now that you have some more confidence, it should be easier for you to get what you want. So, as a measure of your confidence, you are going to go over and talk to Naruto without blushing, stammering, fainting, etc.
Hinata: Oh, but-
Oprah: No buts! Now scoot!
They walk over to the ramen stand, where Naruto ALWAYS is. Oprah and the camera crew jump in a VERY large bush and watch.
Random guy: Hey! What are you doing in my bush!
Oprah: We are on a love mission. It's only for now.
Random guy: I don't care if you're Oprah freakin Winfry! That's MY bush where I do MY BUISNESS!!
Oprah: First of all, I AM OPRAH FREAKIN WINFRY! Minus the freakin, and what kind of business do you exactly do in this bush?
Random guy: Whoops, sorry, I've suddenly decided to take a vow of silence that's effective in 15 seconds. NOW GET OUUUUUUUTT!
Oprah: …fine…now we need to find another bush.
-Ichiraku-
Hinata: H-h-hi, I mean, hi Naruto.
Naruto: Oh, hey Hinata, why are you here?
Hinata: Well, I got a little hungry, but I didn't feel like making anything, so I decided to come over here.
Naruto: Here, I'll buy you some ramen.
Hinata: Oh, no, that's okay…
Naruto: No, seriously, I finally got my wallet back from the Pervy Sage, and it's loaded!
Hinata; Well, if you don't mind.
Naruto: (pays for ramen) So what's going on?
Hinata: I'm starting to think Sakura has gone insane.
Naruto: Yeah, she's been very obsessed with MTV and her new boyfriend lately. She doesn't even want to train anymore! By the way, don't you think that her boyfriend looks a LOT like Sasuke?
Hinata: Well that explains a lot.
Naruto: Yeah, it does. And she completely ignores me whenever I say hi to her. Say, Hinata, do want to go out sometime?
Hinata: (blushes) Sure.
-Off in a corner-
Oprah: (shaking her head) I thought I told that girl not to blush or stammer! Ooh, she is gonna get it!
Hinata: Oprah! It worked!
Oprah: What did I say?
Hinata: So I blushed and stammered ONCE. But it worked! Any advice for my date?
Oprah: I can't really think of anything right now, so all I have to say is think happy thoughts.
Hinata: Like me and Naruto getting married and moving away from my insane family forever?
Oprah: (with 'ya gotta be kidding' look on her face) Um… (grins) Whatever makes you joyous. Now, we are done for the day. Try not to forget what I taught you! Toodles!(waves and walks off with camera crew)
Hinata walks home and as soon as she gets through the door, the phone rings.
Hinata: I've been getting a lot of calls lately. Hello?
Ino: Hinata? Omg, I am so screwed. It's almost time for the double date, and I've been trying to think of a way to ditch it, but nothing works! I even asked Shikamaru, and even HE can't think of anything!
Hinata: Well, I can't think of anything either…wow. Hm, maybe if you're lucky, your dad will scare the hell out of Deidara when he comes over…remember what happened with Kiba?
Ino: (giggle) How my dad suggested he get neutered because he saw all of his perverted thoughts?
Hinata: What did he do to Neji again?
Ino: (frown) No, he trusted Neji…sort of…but he kept on trying to tap into Neji's thoughts, but realized he couldn't because of the Caged Bird seal…then he had a talk about it with your dad, and now they go get drunk with Shika, Chouji, and Shino's dad every Thursday…
Hinata: (sounds confused) On Thursdays, he says he has "clan business" to attend to…
Ino: Hinata, if 'clan business' means getting boozed up in cheap bars, then I really feel bad for you Hyugas.
Hinata: Hm, I should really look into a retirement home or something for him…I just think it would be better for him…
Ino: He's still only 47. I think an asylum would be more 'suited' for his needs. I could get you a discount since I know the people there.
Hinata: You've been in an asylum before?
Ino: (sounding horrified) NOT AS A PATIENT! Oh, shit, my dad's calling me, I better go. Bye!
Hinata shook her head and hung up the phone. This was going to be a hell of a lot to try explaining to her cousin…
Hinata: (saying to herself) Hm…Ino's method of procrastinating until the last minute sounds pretty good now…so does sneaking out of the house to go on my date with Naruto…oh no! That damn Oprah is getting to my head! I must go tell father where I'm going! It's only right…BUT who said I need to tell him I'm going on a date? If I tell him I'm going with a friend…oh but-(battles with conscience)
Hanabi: (ear pressed against the door) Oh no! My sister is finally getting a life and it's all about to be ruined by "Mr. Proper Hyuga" himself. (evil grin) Wait, I know a way that gets dad to agree with ANYTHING. (runs downstairs) Hey, Dad!
Hiashi: Hanabi, I thought I told you that you must address me properly from now on.
Hanabi: Ok then…want me to make you a fruit smoothie?!
Hiashi: (unsure) How about you just make me some tea, Daughter.
Hanabi: All ri-ight! (skips off) Okay, now where's Dad's migratory liquor cabinet? Hmmm…(runs around frantically and opens one by the pantry) JACKPOT!! Wow, he even has tequila and vodka in here! I never thought he could hold down such strong alcohol…
-10 minutes later-
Hanabi: TEA'S READY!!
Hiashi: You mean, "Tea is ready." You know how I despise it when you use contractions. It makes you sound unrefined.
Hanabi: Sure Dad…(gets glare from Hiashi) I mean Father!
-And after around five cups of 'tea'…-
Hiashi: (in total drunk mode) Keep 'em comin' girl…
Hanabi: I'm your daughter you jerk!!
Hiashi: (blinks rapidly) I guess I must be losing memory of my…"conquests".
Hanabi: (thinking: I'm only doing this so that when Hinata gets serious with Naruto, Naruto can hook me up with that babe Konohamaru.) Hinata! Don't you have something you want to ask Daddy?
Hinata comes running from down the hallway in a modest pastel blue top with a sweatshirt and calf-length skirt.
Hinata: (with a slight falter in her voice) Father? I have to be honest with you…I have really liked Naruto Uzumaki for a long time and well…I'm going on a date with him tonight…Can I please go?!
Hiashi: Naruto Uzumaki? That idiot? Hmph, at least she plans to lose her virginity to a man with goals and some promise…
Hinata: (turns red and feels dizzy) No! It's not like that at all! (whispers to Hanabi)
Is Dad all right?
Hanabi: Well, I HAD to help you out if he was going to let you go out with Naruto…
Hinata: (looks concerned and runs for door) I think I will go before things get too out of hand here…
After locking the door and looking back nervously, Hinata starts running for Ichiraku where she and Naruto are going to meet up, but surprisingly, Naruto is taking her somewhere else.
Naruto: Hey! Hinata!
Hinata: (flushes almost unnoticeably) Hello. I'm sorry I'm late, but my dad was…uh, not feeling like himself today…
Naruto: (scratches head) Well, okay then. Well, you know how I told you we're not going to Ichiraku?
Hinata: Which really surprised me since you might as well move your stuff there and start paying rent?
Naruto: Well, you know me, full of surprises and all…(Hinata giggles) so we're going somewhere unexpected and awesome!!
Hinata: Well, as long as I'm home by 9:30...
Naruto: Eh, don't worry about it.
Naruto takes Hinata by the training grounds where there is a roaring black fire thanks to Itachi, who used his Amaterasu in hopes of getting Sakura away from him. Unsuccessfully of course.
Naruto: I was here today earlier, training, when all of a sudden, I see this cool looking fire. Then, Chouji and Shikamaru come past here and I overhear Chouji talking about a cookout. So I put two and two together, which by the way, did you know it equals four, cause I always thought it was twenty-two, and now we're going to cook some food and eat by the fire! Does that sound okay to you?
Hinata: Naruto, that's a great idea. Um…what food did you bring…?
Naruto: (looks in paper bag) Uhh…I got some ramen for myself, and some frozen dumplings for you…I forgot to ask you what you liked, so…
Hinata: Perfect.
Hinata prepares the meal as Naruto starts inching over closer to her when she's not looking. Naruto "accidentally" sticks his hand in the fire.
Naruto: Ow! Oh, whoops, looks like I can't hold my chopsticks to eat my ramen…how will I ever be able to eat my food? Hinata, can you feed me?
Hinata: (stares at him and blushes) Oookay then…
-End of Chappie 3-
Okay, I'm trying to update my fics again but it's hard…I took a bit of a break from fanfic to try to bring up my math grades, and now I'm just easing into this as best as I can. I will post another chappie when I get the chance.