All in a Day's Work
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AN: I couldn't remember how Nanao addresses Yachiru so that might be a bit off.
"Is that your final answer?"
Nanao blinked and then frowned as she stared at the paper in front of her. She knew her Captain had come in and started talking to her. Honestly, she'd heard him. Perfunctorily, she'd answered a few of his questions and then he'd started on one of his rambles about life's beauty or some such philosophical dribble that wasn't conductive to work and she'd, naturally, let him drift out of her head. It was fairly routine.
Since he was now questioning her on an answer she'd apparently given, she found herself at a bit of a loss. Most of the time ignoring him was easily enough done, he was fairly harmless. Occasionally he took it into his brain to be quirky and she had not worked out the way his sometimes twisted mind worked. It was a bit unpredictable.
"Excuse me?" she asked, clarification on the matter was clearly necessary.
Now that she looked up, she took a moment to notice the way he had lounged himself on the floor of her office. His pink kimono was on hiatus and his uniform was spread rather scandalously across his bare chest. She frowned harder. What was going on now?
"Is that your final answer?" he asked again. He was very carefully devoid of expression looking rather on the solemn side. She cursed herself for not paying greater attention; she had clearly missed something important. Careful not to draw herself into an unwanted situation, she thought about how to proceed.
"My final answer on what?" Cocking a brow in his direction she glanced over him. Yes, he was most definitely posed, practically basking there as though he were a cat stretched out in the sun for an afternoon nap. After a moment's pause she considered the fact he'd probably enjoy the comparison and decided not to mention it.
If he was annoyed at her clearly having not been listening it didn't show. He was much more patient than she sometimes gave him credit for. "My pose. The Shinigami Women's Association is doing a calendar. Am I sexy enough?"
Her mind swirled with activity. The Association was doing a calendar? Yachiru hadn't- Nanao glowered. Clearly, Yachiru and her "secret" Vice-Captain Nemu were off doing side projects again. Whenever she annoyed the candy-headed President of the Club, Yachiru picked up Nemu and they held secret meetings without her. Sometimes, Nanao wondered why she bothered.
In response to her unvoiced question he produced a slip of paper and dropped it onto her desk. It was cream colored with gilt writing and Nanao knew at once who had prepared the invites.
"Greetings. The Shinigami Women's Society is producing a calendar, an exclusive edition featuring the Captains of the Gotei-13. We would like to invite you, Captain Kyouraku Shunsui, to share a day with us and pose for pictures. The cover model has yet to be decided, volunteers and suggestions are welcome."
"Should I take off my uniform top and be bare-chested? What about my hair? Should I leave it casually tied at the back or down and flowing around my shoulders? Nanao, I need pointers! Am I sexy? Do you want me?"
His voice had dropped with that last question and she knew the tone of it very well enough. It was the same tone he used whenever he came up behind her and whispered dirty things in her ear. She'd blush and he'd laugh and tell her she needed to get out more. Innocent fun and all that. She found the experience annoying. It made her prickly and defensive. It always felt like he was making fun of her lack of worldly experience when he did that. Should she just be grateful that he wasn't in here wearing something transparent?
"Matsumoto would be a far better judge of whether or not you are sexy. As I am so frequently told, I 'do not get out enough'. Go and find her."
Expecting the dismissal would discourage him and prompt him to leave, she waited. She picked up the paper she'd been reading in a further attempt to shoo him away but the longer the moments ticked away the more she began to rethink her strategy. There was no way she was getting involved in any kind of "make Captain Kyouraku sexy" campaign, which is what he would no doubt call it.
"But you're the Vice-President, Nanao-chan! You have to support me, I'm your Captain! Do you really want Zaraki on the front cover?"
"Actually," she answered. "…a group picture would be best for the cover, Captain, it would boost sales and I am not participating in the calendar project."
Knowing better than to hearten him by paying further attention she kept her eyes on her work, even if she wasn't doing any when she heard him stand up. It might mean he was actually leaving. There was no surprise when, instead of leaving, he dropped the top of his uniform onto the floor, quite loudly, and drew her attention back to him. It was a new strategy for him, bearing flesh.
Dutifully, she looked up.
His arms were crossed across the great expanse of his chest. Muscle against raw muscle. She steadfastly ignored the hitch in her pulse, it meant nothing. His hair fell in loose waves over one shoulder; one edge of his mouth was kicked up in a cocky grin. "Am I sexy now, Nanao?"
She struggled for words as her mind and her heart were warring for control of her tongue. There was simply no way that Yachiru would capture that on a magazine cover and wondered if they'd hired a professional photographer and hoped they had. It was a bit harder to ignore the fact her mouth was now dry.
Her silence was construed as a negative answer as he abruptly dropped the pose and settled for another. He turned halfway and put his hands on his hips and smiled at her again. "Am I sexy now?"
Hewas posing! Outrage and morbid fascination held her prisoner. Propriety popped up to remind her that he was half naked and that he was her senior officer. Lust chimed in that she could see a long line of his thigh through the gap in his hakama and it was muscular thigh. Nanao was stunned into stillness by her own wandering thoughts. Again, silence answered for her.
"Nanaanooooo!" he drawled, stalking forward. Instead of coming around the desk he leaned down pressing his broad palms over two piles of papers putting his chest at her eyelevel. She swallowed dryly, fighting for composure. "You're not helping me," he murmured. "Should I do a little dance?"
The thought of him dancing at first brought a spot of humor to her belly. But then she remembered that he'd be shaking his hips for Yachiru and Nemu and it was a sobering thought. She couldn't even fathom how they would take that particular sight.
"Captain-"
It was too late. He was back in the middle of the floor swaying his hips in the most absurd fashion when behind him the door slid open. The visitor, at first unnoticed by her Captain, dropped her jaw in shock and Nanao felt a brief moment of pity for the trembling little aide. The girl was, after all, brand new. As an extern she hadn't even graduated from the academy yet. Barely able to draw a breath the little aide toppled over into a dead faint and the Captain turned, curious, dance ended. "Eh?"
The loss of his gaze upon hers gave her time to collect her thoughts and recapture her composure. "Captain, I would like to remind you at this point that this campaign will be ineffective with the project manager, Yachiru." She reached into her desk feeling control of the situation returning to her. In the top drawer she pulled out a plain cloth bag and tossed it toward him which he caught handily. "Give her this and she'll give you the cover or anything else you want."
Just as she thought the situation was under control, the underfoot aide and her half dressed Captain were suddenly not her only company. Matsumoto bounced in the door, nearly missing the fallen girl in the doorway.
"Oooh, is this a private show or can anyone sit in?" she raised her eyebrows salaciously, a grin upon her lips.
"Actually," Nanao perked up. "Captain Kyouraku is looking for suitable poses for the women's calendar shoot, perhaps you could assist him?"
"Oooh," Matsumoto repeated. "Are you sure you don't want to help? Maybe oil him up a little? Play with his hair?"
Nanao frowned; the third time since he'd sauntered in some time before. She wasn't going to oil any part of his body. Amend that, she thought, she wasn't going to touch any part of his body. She wasn't sure if on days like these she felt like an old prudish grandma or a naïve girl. He had the distinct ability to drive her from one extreme of emotion to another.
"I think not. If you will excuse me, I'm losing time and I've work to do. Leave." It was obviously well past the time she gave direct commands about going away.
"Oh! How about edible body paint?" Matsumoto's expression was practically glowing. "We could get a couple of the girls in the picture all posed around you ready to lick it off."
Nanao pinched the bridge of her nose and rubbed the area gently. She was glad, at times like this, that she was excluded from the personal circle that was Matsumoto and her Captain and their drinking party. Insanity had to be contagious.
"Get out of my office right now," Nanao snapped. "And take your clothes with you." When they both turned toward her looking a bit surprised at her venomous tone she scowled at them for added effect.
He reached down and scooped up the fallen garment and Nanao felt the tension in her shoulders ease a bit. It looked like she was actually getting rid of him.
"Don't worry, Nanao! I'll make him sexy for you!" The buxom blonde smirked wildly and then brought a hand up to cup one side of her mouth as if she was telling a secret. "Maybe I can even get him to do a private photo shoot for you!"
Nanao lowered her gaze to her papers as they vacated her doorway leaving the fallen aide behind without as much as a glance. The tension in her shoulders finally left her and a bit of fatigue set in. She needed to stop letting him get to her like this, it only gave her the oddest muscle aches in the evenings.
Down the hall she could hear their retreating voices deep in conversation. "Let's get naked for Nanao-chan!" he suddenly exclaimed. Giggles followed the pronouncement that weren't from Matsumoto. A few moments later a couple of her squad members tried to look casual as they crept by her open office doorway. The aide was still passed out.
"Do you think she made a pass at the Captain and Vice-Captain Ise knocked her out?"
"Maybe it was Vice-Captain Matsumoto!"
"It could be a kinky threesome!"
With a growl, Nanao stood and slid her door shut. Retreating to her desk she sighed. Just another day in Division Eight.
-End