Title: Falling Petals
Pairing: This chapter contains slight Kyouraku/Ukitake
Rating: M
Warnings: This chapter doesn't really seem like it's Rated M, but as the story progresses, it will become more obvious. There is also slight OOC (sorry guys...)
Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach Tite Kubo does.
Everyday that passed reminded him of that one day, that day when his captain left him to sell his soul to the man who could make the Devil fall to his knees and beg for mercy. Everyday that ounce of pain came back to haunt him as he had to continue on and do his work. Lieutenant Kira Izuru was the man that they had now put in charge of the 3rd Division of the Gotei 13 since the day when the former Captain Ichimaru Gin ascended to the heavens along with former 5th Division Captain Aizen Sousuke.
This was an average day for him to begin with, but it would soon change his life forever. He walked forward trying not to be late for an important meeting that he had with the Captain Commander. The 3rd Division had been weakened ever since Ichimaru's defection and Kira was blamed for all of the problems that they had.
"Did you hear about the 3rd Division? They have lost half of their efficiency."
"That's because of Kira-fukutaichou, he just isn't as productive as the his superior was. He can't even breathe without Ichimaru saying that it's alright."
"Poor Izuru-chan."
That's all he ever heard recently, "poor Izuru-chan, they should get someone else to control him." But he was different than others thought that he was. He wasn't like the other lieutenants; he was more loyal than all of them combined. But the loyalty to Ichimaru was useless now; there was no telling when he was going to come back, if he ever was.
He walked by all of the other Divisions, seeing the hard working officers in each of them. In conversations between other lieutenants with captains he heard that their workload was just as tough. He heard from Abarai Renji of the 6th Division that he had been doing more work that he had ever done in his life now because of the upcoming war scare.
There's no helping it, I'm just not as lucky as Abarai-kun; at least he has Kuchiki-taichou just in case something were to happen to him. I'm all that the 3rd Division has ever since Ichimaru-taichou left. He continued to walk toward the 1st Division, praying that it was all going to get better at the end of all of this.
0o0o0o0o0o0
"You think that everyone will ever stop working this hard? Do you think that the war will ever end, Ukitake?" Yamamoto asked the 13th Division captain. "You seem to think so."
Ukitake looked up at his sensei, a gentle smile rolling across his face. "I fully believe that we restore the power to this land, I don't have a single doubt," he took a drink of tea, swallowing it quickly as his dark eyes still look upon his sensei. "Do you think that they will be the same?"
"The day when Ichimaru Gin, Aizen Sousuke, and Tousen Kaname left we knew that we would lose some control over the Soul Society. There is only so much that a lieutenant can do for his division, no matter how strong he is. If they are not a captain," the old man made deep eye contact with his student, "They are nothing."
Ukitake froze at the moment as he remembered what happened that day, the day when Kuchiki Rukia was supposed to be put to death. Those poor lieutenants, all three of them were put into a world of turmoil and trouble. At that moment none of them could do anything to stop them, and the tears that were cried could never draw them back. Ukitake never cried a drop for any of the traitors, but he had known that many had, waiting for the day when they would come back. Waiting for the day that would never come.
"Power will be restored," Ukitake answered hopefully, the black cloud of sorrow that covered all of them clearing into a golden aura of optimism. "Even if all of us must die, this place will regain the peace that we dreamed of long ago."
"What makes you so sure?" Yamamoto asked as he narrowed his eyes at his overjoyed student, watching him take a brief sip of tea, the smile that was on his face, fading away as he looked back at the commander.
"Genryuusai-dono," he took a breath as he started to explain. "Those three seats will need to be filled. I know that everyone says that they're coming back, but I know better. I knew the second that Aizen left that none of them are coming back. To increase power those seats need to be filled immediately."
At that moment, the door opened, Kira walking into the room seeing Ukitake before him, breaking the deathly chill in the air. Kira bowed immediately as he looked at the 13th Division captain sitting at Yamamoto's side, his eyes closing tightly in embarrassment. But looking up, he saw the smile roll across Ukitake's face; he saw the warmth that was rolling threw him. For once in the presence of Yamamoto, he felt less tense.
"Sorry to interrupt you, soutaichou, Ukitake-taichou, but I've brought the reports from the 3rd Division," Kira swallowed hard as he watched Ukitake raise a dark eyebrow at the lieutenant's shaking form. "I'm sorry that they're late, it's just I-I," he took a deep breath. "Well I've had a lot of catching up to do and it was hard to find the time. The seated officers have problems of their own so I thought that I should take care of it all by myself."
Ukitake stood up as Kira froze, sensing the hand come closer to him. The ice melted the instant that he felt the captain touch him, a small laugh leaving his lips as he looked through the paperwork.
"Didn't leave anything out, did you Kira-kun?" Ukitake asked as he flipped through the pages seeing the pages filled to maximum capacity with the lieutenant's writing. "You do your research that's for sure."
Kira then closes his eyes tightly. "I'm so sorry if you were busy, I'll come back…!" he looked up to see a set of dark eyes staring into his. His heart froze, the electrical impulses that worked the rhythm dying, making his flesh tingle, breath refusing to come from his lungs. Deep in those eyes he could swear that he saw what heaven was really like, to see the warmth and comfort of paradise, the power of the world. His hands moved to reach for the glory that was within that man, but he could never touch him. "… Later," he finished as he continued to stare into those dark irises.
Dryness filled his throat as he struggled to swallow, but felt at though his muscles couldn't move even if he forced them. The warm hand then was placed on his shoulder again as a smile rolled across his lips, a small chuckle passing them.
"Any problems with the 3rd Division?" Ukitake asked as he removed his hand, turning around to walk back to Yamamoto. "How is the work faring?"
"If I may be honest, Ukitake-sama, I'm not able to do any work. I have no power over the Division, no real power. I am only a lieutenant, not anything more. I have no control over the 3rd Division when it comes to meetings. If I could perhaps have a captain that could help us do our work, I would appreciate that. If this is too much to ask then I will leave and try to manage."
Ukitake's smile made Kira's heart burn as he chuckled again. "I don't have that much work these days, the 13th Division is actually ahead of the rest," he turns around his eyes locking with those of the commander. "Genryuusai-dono, with your permission I would like to help this poor boy with the work that his division cannot get done."
I can't let him do that, this man is Ukitake Juushirou, damn it. I can't take him away from his duties! Kira shook his head. "No, I don't want to impose on someone of Ukitake-sama's station. I don't want to be selfish and take one of the most powerful captains in the Gotei 13 from his own…"
"Relax, Izuru-kun," Ukitake glanced back at his sensei. "How about it, sensei? Do I have permission to help Kira-fukutaichou out with his work or is he damned to Hell?"
Yamamoto smiled gently at his student's eagerness. "I'll allow it. From this moment on Ukitake Juushirou will be in charge of the 3rd Division's work. You will work with Kira Izuru until the two of you feel as though he is caught up."
Ukitake bows. "Thank you, sensei."
Kira copied the motion and bows his body shaking as he washed away all of the comments, he was no longer going to be known as "poor Izuru-chan" he was now going to be Lieutenant Kira, the one who helped pull the 3rd Division out of the mud and into the light of day. Everything that Ichimaru ever was already started to burn into nothing more than ashes, soon there would be nothing left, nothing but the memory of the former captain.
"Thank you, Ukitake-taichou," he bowed his eyes starting to water. "No words of gratitude can state how grateful that I am to you. I won't allow you to be let down throughout all of this; I will work my hardest to make you proud to be working with me," he turned around walked toward the door. He actually got a captain to help him out, a dream that Renji had laughed at countless times when they were together stating that would never happen. Renji was wrong as usual and this was going to be fun to rub in the other lieutenant's face.
As Kira left, Yamamoto sighed, shaking his head. Ukitake turned to him, his smile remaining on his face. "What?"
"You seem happy about this," Yamamoto stated as suspicion was growing within him with a flame that would never go out. "Why were you so eager to help that boy out with his work? We all know that you have your own problems in the world, with the consumption…"
"I decided that I wanted to do something nice, one last good deed before I…" Ukitake's smile faded to a smirk, his eyes still glittering with an innocence that nobody would ever be able to destroy. "Besides, I see something in that boy that I would like to bring out."
He walked away from his sensei looking over at Kira walking with Renji, both of them smiling. Everything that boy had that he didn't know was there was starting to shine through like a comet descending from the heavens, burning with the energy of three suns. The smile that had been on Ukitake's face came back as he wanted to unleash that power that was inside of Kira. He was going to be the one who was going to allow him to see what the world was like with all of the power that he had within him in his control.
"One day, Izuru-kun," Ukitake breathed. "We will see who you truly are…"
0o0o0o0o0o0
The sake burned his throat as he swallowed it, his eyes closing tightly, water rolling down his cheeks. I shouldn't be doing this. It's been a while since I've drank any sake, he must know I'm hiding something from him; Shunsui was always good at that. He looked at his best friend Kyouraku, he knew there was something wrong the second that the ill man took a sip of the sake, he didn't hide it very well.
"Alright, Ukitake," Kyouraku started with a laugh. "What are you hiding? You're drinking like a child," he poured his friend another cup, his eyes locking with his best friend's for a long moment as he analyzed the look on his face.
"Nothing, I'm just doing some work for the 3rd Division, it's nothing that amazing," he took another sip of sake, his body shaking as he coughed gently. "I wanted to do it."
"Are you crazy? Life's too short to be acting so responsibly especially your life," Kyouraku watched as his friend took another sip of sake, not paying attention to him. "I guess when you get happy no one can get through to you."
"I want to help someone, Shunsui," Ukitake breathed. "Even if I can't help myself, I want to save that boy from what Ichimaru did to him. Besides, I would like to see Kira one day be the one who is in control of the 3rd Division, just a thought I've been having all day."
"You think about things like that too much. Juushirou, you're always thinking about what to do for other people, but you aren't aware of what you're going through," Kyouraku explained. "You have your own problems and you should live just for your happiness not for that of other people," he sighed, putting the cup down. "How is it doing lately, has it been unbearable?"
Ukitake glanced down into his cup as for once in the whole day, his lungs burned, feeling the air sacs filling with blood, the liquid bubbling with every breath. The thought of crimson ran through his mind as he feared what the night would bring. The unbearable sweats, the unbearable coughs, the unbearable chills. The hell that darkness brought scared him every night, the hell of the stars in the sky. As others slept peacefully in their beds, he was the one who had to suffer as he had suffered since youth. Through the agony, he realized that there was one purpose for him to live, to make sure that no one else would ever suffer as he did. No one deserved to lose everything that they ever wanted in the blink of an eye, not when they were just children.
He put on a smile as he looked back at his friend. "It's not a problem, Shunsui. I'm fine for now…"
"When you finally admit that you're lying to me I will be there to help you," Kyouraku's eyes met with Ukitake's watching the 13th Division captain falter at the glance, everything stopping for a moment in the world. "Besides," Kyouraku then smiled a carefree grin, "I could have Nanao-chan take care of all of that work for you. She wouldn't mind picking up a few more papers."
Ukitake bowed his head. Carefree Shunsui. Fun-loving, lecherous 8th Division captain. Fun first, play second; no one was going to live long enough to spend all of their time within an office doing endless paperwork. Without love, without stupidity, without recklessness, life was boring and meaningless and you would die in regret.
"Thank you, Kyouraku," Ukitake breathed quietly, his eyes closing for a brief moment.
"Shirou, you're not going get depressed now are you?" Shunsui asked.
Ukitake then opened his eyes a smile coming back to his face as he laughed gently. "How could I be depressed when there's so much to be happy over? I always have lows in my emotions, but I never feel as though I should purposely end my life, I can't imagine doing that to myself."
"Shirou…" Kyouraku started.
"But those kids, those poor children," Ukitake shook his head as he muttered as silent curse. "They went through so much, so much that they should never go through. Those three captains betrayed them, they used them, they abused them, and then they left them in the end to try to put it all back together. And they are trying, I see it everyday that they are trying to put together what happened and they will never look at their captains the same way ever again."
"But what about the work? Why did you pick Kira if all of them are suffering?" Kyouraku asked as he looked at his best friend.
"Hisagi-kun is doing fine all by himself, he has even surpassed divisions that still have their captains. Hinamori-kun has Hitsugaya-taichou helping her out with her work and is getting by just fine. But Kira-kun," he looked over at Kyouraku. "He isn't doing so well. The 3rd Division suffered because Ichimaru spoiled his lieutenant, he never let him do anything on his own, not even think. With him gone, there's very little that Kira-kun can do. If we could have known…"
"None of use knew, none of us wanted to believe that we could be betrayed by captain level shinigami. Those three didn't sense anything was totally wrong with their captain, Hisagi especially. I didn't even see Tousen being one of them, he always seemed so loyal to us. You don't have to make it all up to us, there are nine other captains who were blinded to this as well, twelve lieutenants," Kyouraku took another sip of sake. "I don't want you to wear yourself out because you think you were the only one who caused all of that pain."
"I know, but to look into that boy's eyes and see his captain still strangling the life out of him," Ukitake shook his head. "I don't want to know what Ichimaru did to him, he went through the most, I believe that he went through even more than Hinamori-kun. She didn't have to feel as her captain tried to belittle her everyday. Kira-kun has no dignity as a human left."
Then he remembered the long glance that they had into each other's eyes, the looks of fear in the boy's eyes. But breaking through the countless inches of fear, he could see one thing: potential. The potential was burning gently, but not strong enough to burn through the feelings of worthlessness. Ukitake tried to grasp that fire as he felt Kira try to grasp onto him for safety. They were reaching for each other; there was no doubt in his mind that the feeling was mutual. He was going to save that boy from the hell that he was suffocating in. He wasn't going to let him die.
"But yet, I saw something within his eyes that looked like he had some pride left. He has more potential than I ever thought that he could. That boy has something that the other two don't, he wants to surpass Ichimaru Gin, he wants to know that he doesn't have to live surrounded by the dark nature of his captain."
"And you saw all of that in his eyes?" Kyouraku asked.
Ukitake closed his eyes as his voice became rich with hope. "He is trying to clear away the mental scars, it's slow, but he is doing it. The pieces of his life were strewn haphazardly that day, but he's starting to gather them," his dark eyes opened as he looked at the sun setting, bringing on the cursed darkness of night, his body stiffening as he felt the bubbling become worse, sweat starting to form on his body, the darkness embracing his fear. Everything was starting to freeze within him, Hell had returned. Maybe he would be spared this night, he could only pray.
"I'll take you inside, Ukitake," Kyouraku stated as he helped Ukitake off of the ground. "You'll catch your death out here."
As he was pulled inside he thought deeper into those blue eyes, deeper into the thought that one day there could be strength within them and a world with no more fear. One day he would put the pieces together, Ichimaru being vanquished into nothing but dust and cobwebs. That day was going to be sooner than anyone thought; Ukitake knew it to be true.
I want to put your pieces back together, he closed his eyes as he was encompassed in the warmth of the 8th Division, Kyouraku's arm around his shoulders, pulling him closer to fight away the Godforsaken cold. I want to be the one who helps you out of there, so one day the pieces between you and I will line up together to make a constellation of a new glory that not even Ichimaru Gin could destroy. One day we will see that. One day…
There will be more chapters to come after this. And happy holidays!