EDITED NOVEMBER 2nd 2009
Edward walked down the streets of Washington DC, on a particularly cloudy day, hands shoved in his pockets and scanning the thoughts of people near him without reason. A light drizzle was falling around him, causing his expensive suede jacket become spotted. Glancing towards a nearby commercial bookstore, Edward walked over, and entered. He had always liked novels, it passed the time quickly, and there were always new ones. After all, the classics got boring after the eighth or ninth time reading them. Scanning the bookshelves, Edward found himself in the music section. A loud, brightly colored book on contemporary music caught his eye so he grabbed it and sat down in an oversized armchair. He hummed under his breath as he opened the first page to the book.
A woman sat down across from him, and her scent made him flare his nostrils. The familiar sweet, inviting smell caused him to search for the woman's thoughts, though he couldn't find them. Only a few years had passed since he had left Bella, and he still remembered her 'brand' like he had been with her yesterday. Resisting the urge to look up, Edward continued to flip the pages of his book, slowly- not paying attention to the words any more. The woman moved slightly, Edward watched her movement from under his eyelashes; he didn't dare look up at her. From what he could see, the woman was wearing a pencil skirt with light tights shading her obviously pale skin. His heart wrenched, as he thought about Bella.
"You know what I'm going to say." Edward looked at her with hard eyes. He wouldn't waver.
"No." she said, equally as stubborn, she wasn't going to make this easy for him.
"I'm leaving you." His eyes were black, not with hunger but with something else.
"You promised you wouldn't." She crossed her arms and looked away to her right.
"Promises can be broken. And I promised I would only stay if it were safe for you." Edward said, wanting Bella to look at him. He grabbed her chin and turned her head towards him. Her eyes were lined with tears. "Don't do anything stupid."
She stared into his eyes.
"Why do you care what I do? You're leaving aren't you!" she said with spite. Edward wanted a clean break for Bella, this time he wouldn't give in and come back. He was leaving for good and now he had to step-up his act.
"I wouldn't want Charlie to worry." He said almost nonchalantly.
"So you care more about Charlie than me?" Bella screamed.
"Yes!" They both stood in her room, breathing heavily. Slowly Edward formed the words with his mouth. "I don't give a damn about you anymore. You're suffocating me, and I need to breathe." Edward watched Bella argue with herself internally, weighing if what he had said were true. Other than his statement being wholly ironic, it was also one of the biggest lies he'd ever told. One more thing, one thing to make her hate him, and he'd be gone. "Besides, did you ever think you were even close to being good enough for me?"
"You don't mean that." She whispered uncertainly.
"Come on, stop being so naïve. I never loved you, Bella. You were just a plaything to pass the time with." He was a monster, the worst sort of being- he was hurting her in he worst way possible. Bella looked at him through angry tears.
"Get out."
And he was gone.
After what seemed like ages, the woman closed the book she was looking at and grabbed the purse next to her feet. Edward heard her heart beat increase and his enhanced ears heard the almost silent word that was uttered from the woman's mouth.
"Edward?" Edward looked up slowly, seeing Bella for the first time in four years. Her hair had grown reached down her back in long rich curls, and her body looked better than it had before. When he looked at her face though, he could have sworn that she was a vampire as well. Her skin was pale and her eyes were sunken with bags lining them. She was still beautiful, breathtakingly so, but something looked off.
"Bella." He croaked out. Seeing her was killing him, especially how he knew that he couldn't get her back. Bella's mouth hung slightly open, and her eyes were wide. The look of surprise was clearly on her face. She glanced over him, up and down.
"You're looking well." She said with little emotion, after a moment of collecting herself. She had learned years before that emotion was weak, and it only hurt her. Her pulse had quickened with excitement and longing, but she wouldn't let him know that. With slow words, Edward replied.
"You too, as always. How are things?" He made small talk as he was having an internal battle with himself. He'd almost started to get over her- not really, but his heart had started to heal slightly over the four years they'd been apart. Seeing her today simply reminded him that he would never stop loving her. He wanted to be with her, so badly that it physically hurt to be more than 2 feet away from her. He wanted to hold on and never let her go again. On the other hand, he would only put her in danger if he were any where close to her. He thought once again of his time with the human, and his dead heart ached. Her response was slow, as if she had to think about it.
"Well. And you?" her voice was so even and void of any recollection of their past, that it made Edward question whether she had ever felt the same as him. It was like she had forgoten, Edward had to remind himself that that's what he had wanted. His voice, in contrast, was wavered and rushed.
"Good." That was a lie, Edward's life had been lonely and bleak for the last four years, but he got by with the help of Alice. Against her judgment, Bella noticed the lack of talking and wanted the awkwardness to stop.
"Well then, I guess I'll be seeing you." she put her book under her arm and turned to depart.
He couldn't just leave things like this. After four years apart, to just bump into her and go? The friendly thing would be to talk over a drink or something right?
"Bella…" he paused, " would you like to go get coffee with me? We could catch up." She looked shocked, and confused, but nodded.
"Now?" she asked in a business like manner, when Edward nodded she slung her purse around her shoulder and held up the book. "Let me just pay for this, and we can go." he followed her to the cashier and waited for her to purchase her item. Soon they walked out the door in silence and down the street to a nearby coffee shop.
They sat at a table in the far end of the small café, the aroma of tea leaves and freshly ground coffee beans filled the air. Edward took a deep breath, savoring the smell of the shop, mixed with the sweet smell of Bella. It was a delicious blend.
Bella sat across from Edward, looking into her steaming Chai tea trying to avoid the uncomfortable silence they had come to. Edward leaned back in his chair, trying to appear more relaxed- and in turn make Bella feel at ease. It didn't work. She remained straight backed, with her head down.
"So are you living here now?" she asked, without curiosity. Her eyes stayed where they were, and only her words made it to Edward.
He shook his head.
"No, I'm just staying for a while, thought I'd come back to the States as a quick trip." She quirked her brow, inviting him to continue. He didn't.
"And where were you before?"
"England for the most part, Telford, Coventry, Wolverhampton… I stayed mostly to the west-midlands. And before that I travelled around Russia I think."
She looked up, "You think?"
"I was distracted and didn't get out to see the sights much. I really only went for Jasper. He's always wanted to go to Russia."
"And the others?" She didn't need to say their name, Edward knew who she was talking about.
"Alice decided to take cooking courses in Paris, so her and Jasper are there now. Esme and Carlisle are in Brazil, while it's still the rainy season. And Rosalie and Emmet on another one of their honeymoons somewhere in Egypt, How they're getting around unnoticed is beyond me." he smiled, simply happy to be chatting with her. "And you? What have you been doing?" when she replied, her face still remained emotionless.
"Not much, I've got my degree for urban studies and I'm working with a small company downtown." She stared down in her drink. A man walked past the table they were sitting at and brushed her shoulder, the sudden contact startling her- causing her to hit her spoon to the floor. Edward reached down under the table and grabbed it, moving at a human pace. He slowed down though, when he saw her legs. The skirt she was wearing had a small slit on the side and had risen up when she sat down. It wasn't the attractiveness of her body that made him slow however, but it was what was under the slit that had surprised him. A dark, blue and purple bruise had formed there, it appeared painful. He sat up straight.
"The bruise on your leg looks like it hurts, how'd it happen?" It was an innocent question; he'd wanted to show friendly concern for her.
" I fell." was her answer. Simple, short and perfectly plausible. Edward smiled, so even after these years she was still the same old clumsy Bella. They had a pleasant conversation for another hour or so, passing over several subjects, none of which would bring up memories. Bella's phone rang, pleasant music filling the air; a classical piece. She answered it.
"Hello?" He looked away from Edward. "Yes, I know- I'm sorry. I'm having coffee with a friend. Did you want me to pick up something on the way? Okay. See you soon." she flipped her phone down and put it in her purse. She stood up with Edward.
"I've got to be getting home," she said with a little more kindness in her voice than before, "It was nice to see you again." she stuck out her hand, waiting for him to shake it. Edward glanced at the outstretched arm, and rushed in to hug her tightly. Four years without her had caused a burning sensation within himself. He just needed to be close to her, just had to be next to her.
The embrace she received from Edward was unexpected, but not unwelcome. She hugged back- but uneasily, resting her head against his jacket. As odd as it sounded, she missed hugging a marble statue.
Edward wanted to hang on to her longer.
"Would you like a ride?" he asked, desperately hoping she would say yes. She looked taken aback, and then she smiled warmly, but with sad eyes.
"I don't think that would be a good idea." She walked out through the maze of tables in the coffee shop to the entrance with Edward following. They looked out the window at the grim weather. The light drizzling had turned into a dark rain, which was blowing at a rather horizontal angle.
"Are you sure you wouldn't like a ride?" Edward smirked at her, she smiled back.
"Alright."
The two of them walked bravely out into the storm and down half a block to a sleek black car. Edward opened the passenger door for her, as he used too, and went around to the driver's side. By the time they were both in the car, they were soaking wet. Bella looked at him with amusement. She laughed at him, snickering childishly. Edward smiled, not knowing what she was so entertained with. He lifted his eyebrow in a questioning way.
"You look ridiculous." She said through giggles. Edward flipped down the visor and looked in the mirror; he did look funny. The rain had made half of his normally perfect hair stand up and to the side, while the rest of it stuck to his forehead; he resembled a drowned cat. He chuckled to himself, and then looked at Bella. Unlike him, she looked godly, the rain highlighting her features. Her hair hung over her shoulders, and across her face. Her eyes were alight and twinkling, mouth opened in a wide smile. The thin spring shirt she was wearing clung to her body, and Edward noticed with alarm that she was actually much skinnier than he thought, almost unhealthily so. As he continued to inspect her, he noticed that she looked like one of his kind. Other than her startling beauty, the rain had made her face and skin even paler than before, and the purple bruises under her eyes were prominent, as if she hadn't gotten sleep in days. He stopped laughing, she wasn't healthy, and this was the first time he'd seen her show any sort of emotion since they'd met in the bookstore. She seemed somewhat damaged, and Edward hoped to God that it wasn't because of him.
Read
and review. Not many changes were made in this chapter, but major
changes and new chapters will be added in the upcoming edits.
Hope
you enjoy it
I've changed certain things specifically so that Edward and Bellas
relationship progresses more slowly also I'm planning to have Derek
stick around a little longer.
love Jen.