Chapter 3

shipet100 – LOL its not supposed to be bubbly! Its deep and duhpressinnnnn!!!! Okay maybe not as angsty as it could be.

Okay onto the third instalment of Beyond the Stars xD So here I am I was up until 4am last night writing this out in bed so I might have to tweak as I write. Also if you know me… you know I cant write smut for elephants testicals…

ALSO MY BETA READER HAS DIEDDDD! Well really shes at Uni so anyone want the job?

I groaned trying to shift into a more comfortable position on my leather couch. It would be so much easier if I didn't have this damn weight on my chest. Opening my eyes hesitantly I saw the pink angel lying on my body. I smiled to myself. He was sleeping like a baby. That was for the moment anyway. Some nights I would pad down the hallway to where he was sleeping and spend hours just watching him sleep. Sometimes he would look so peaceful and serine like he was now. But some nights, well really most nights, he would have nightmares and his face would contort with pain and he would kick at the covers, trying to fight off those demons in his dreams.

I coughed a little, smiling as a stray lock of Shuichi's candy floss hair fell over his face and tickled his nose slightly. I brushed it back behind his ear letting my fingers linger some over his face.

This was the first night; since he had come back to me that he slept in my arms. Actually scratch that it was our first afternoon. The sun was hanging lazily in the sky and the sky had turned a rosy shade of red. I guess we were both exhausted from everything that had happened this week, emotionally and physically. It had been especially hard on my Shu-chan. I know though that if I could freeze time for one moment it would be this. I missed lying with the lithe body of the singer. His body heat mixing with mine and our hearts beating together.

I never thoughts that id fall in love again after Kitzazawa. I thought no one would love me. After all I was broken. I was 'damaged goods' if you like. And honestly I was afraid of ever being hurt again. So I loved up my heart and threw away the key into the deepest darkest ocean. But Shuichi had found that key and slowly I was learning to love again instead of being so fucked up in the head so much. And now I had to find his key, god after all the shit I had put him through in the past, he more than deserved it.

A solitary tear fell from my eyes and my breath hitched causing my lover to shift slightly on my chest. It wasn't just Awizawa's fault that my poor little Shuichi had been hurt so much. Sure he had hurt him physically but I had broken him emotionally. It had taken too long for my cold exterior to melt. I had loved him I always had but I had never told him. I had always hidden it from him. Another tear fell from my eyes.

"Don't cry Yuki… You're not supposed to cry."

I sighed squeezing the boy in my arms tightly. "I'm so sorry Shu. I'm didn't mean for this to happen. I'm so sorry my love."

The singer turned his head slightly to face me, resting his chin on my chest and stare at my blankly. "Yuki?"

"If I hadn't been so cold, such a bastard when we first met then none of this would ever ha-"

Sugary soft lips pressed against my own silencing me in surprise. God how I missed those kisses. The way he would dart his tongue out over my lips making them part ever so slightly just enough though for him to slide his tongue into them. I relaxed and began sucking on it slightly and he let out a low moan. A moan that was reserved for me only. No one else was aloud to hear that sexy moan but me and I smirked at the thought. I know I'm possessive but when it comes to Shuichi I am and I've said before I won't deny it.

I shifted slightly, letting the singer get into a position where he could deepen the kiss if he wanted to. But such an action lead our groins to accidentally rub against each other and our moans filled the small apartment like music and I purposefully rocked my hips against his this time.

He moaned again, more loudly this time and he pulled back slightly from the kiss our faces within inches of the others. He was blushing deeply.

I grinned gently rubbing his parted lips gently with one of my thumbs. "You know you're so cute when you blush Shu," I whispered, which only made him blush even more turning his face a deeper shade of crimson.

As he was only wearing one of my shirts and his own tight white boxers that were very tight at the moment I could see the sexy outline of his erection and my cock twitched and my mouth watered just thinking about what lay beneath the thin cotton. Yes I'm a seme who loves giving head. And it's a privilege reserved for my Shuichi alone!

Damn I want. I want him now. Not because I want 'release'. I want him so he can remember what real sex is… real love making. But I knew that was going past what we were doing. It was up to him. I don't want to admit it but for the moment he is a temporary Seme.

"Shuichi?" Why was he staring at me?

"I love you Yuki."

I blinked in surprise. I definitely didn't expect him to say that. But he had and it wasn't a dream. The desperate throbbing in my cock told me it wasn't. I smiled reaching up to him to cup his face and drawing him near for a kiss. "And I love you Shu," I whispered suddenly shifting to nibble his ear lightly.

"Neee- Yuki that tickles!" He squirmed under my touch.

I grinned treasuring his beautiful smile. His genuine drop dead gorgeous smile. I kept nibbling on his ear, lightly biting and tugging on it with my teeth. Stroking his sides as he moaned in pleasure.

"That's mean Yukiiiiiiii!"

"Do you want me to stop?" I slipped a hand into his boxers and gently began stroking the very top of his buttocks. I knew he loved that because he arched his back into my hand.

"Yukiiiii!" He gasped my name through almost fevered pants.

Stopping my ministrations I looked at him seriously for a moment. "Do you want me to stop? Do you Shuichi?"

I winced inwardly as I saw him bite down on his bottom lip and nod slowly. I closed my eyes and drew my hands from his pants. "Sorry Shu." I tried desperately to hide the rejection and disappointment from the boy. But I couldn't help but think 'he loves me'. He. Loves. Me.

"No. I'm sorry Yuki."

I looked into his eye, suddenly unsure of myself.

"I love you. But…" He sighed. 'But' was never a good word to use in these heart to heart talks. "But I'm… I'm just not ready for…" he paused looking away from me searching for the right words to use. I know what he meant though. He thought I wanted to fuck him. Sure we'd gone from this playful tickling to other 'things' and I knew that that was on his mind. "I just need to get over what ha-"

GRUMBLE

I laughed as he was cut off by his own stomach wanting to be heard and my mind wandered back to those cold waffles. "You hungry shu?"

He nodded shyly. "Sorta."

"What about you go get dressed and we'll go out for dinner. You can even choose where we go." I smirked tussling his pink locks.

"And we can get pocky too?"

"Of course we can love," I smiled kissing his forehead lightly before he bounced off my lap to get changed.

He. Loves. Me.