I crouched in the corner of my bedroom feeling scared and confused about what had happened only moments earlier, when I admitted everything and wasn't aware of what to expect. Instead of being patient, I ran back home and huddled in the corner hoping I wouldn't wake up the next day. I was always a wuss.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I feel so different now that I've gotten to know him. But he was my crush's brother, well ex-crush. I was just a thirteen-year old boy. I don't know much about anything except homework, friends, and horrible teachers. I didn't realize that along with that came confused hormones and extreme frustration. I feel lost and scared.

Scared about how the other kids would think of me, scared of being hated for something that was out of my hands, scared of losing the only friends I have who also care enough about my well-being. How will this affect me later on?

I remember researching my assumptions online a few days ago and was scared to discover some of the serious consequences that came along with being, the way I am. I saw people, with ages that spanned from teenagers to adults, about being killed, hated, neglected, and have become total outcasts from society just because they were being true to themselves.

Is that how I'll end up? Another headline on the front of the newspaper? The latest topic on the 10'oclock news? A statistic for a country wide research study? What is there to live for in the world when you're in my shoes? I'm just another soul who's lost between the balance of life and the inevitable.

I started to think of all the events that led up to where I was crouched now, the events where I, Freddie Benson, realized there's more to life than being behind the camera…

A/N: I don't own iCarly. But I do own this plotline.

Will update soon.