Okay, first things first. I have not vanished off the face of the earth. But, ever since the last chapter, I have been supremely busy, and struggling to keep my grades up. Take it from me, college is tough. Also, it was difficult to find material from episode two, so I have decided to skip to episode 3 (Lelouch returns to school, for those who don't know).

That said, thank you to those who have reviewed and faved this story. You're the wind beneath my wings, and I'm not joking about that.

Code Geass: Spoof of the Rebellion

Chapter 3: Back to School

As the former Japanese left the ruins of Shinjuku in droves, members of the Britannian military held confused conversations with one another.

"We're letting the Elevens go?"

"Well, it's Prince Clovis's order!"

"What about that gas we were supposed to retrieve?"

"Gas? I thought we were supposed to recover that green haired-"

"Dog! No, his majesty told us to forget about the green haired dog. Shut up, you idiot, those rebels might still be listening in!"

"I was going to ask General Bradley what was going on, but it seems he and his men have left their posts."

"They left Prince Clovis alone on the command deck?!"

"Oh, come on, Colonel. He's a big boy, I think he can be left alone for a few minutes."

"The last time you said that, he stuck his big toe in a light socket."

"We gotta send somebody up to that command deck. And hire his majesty a babysitter. I just hope he's not in trouble."

On the command deck, where Prince Clovis is in trouble...

...Although he seemed unaware that he had a gun pointed at his face. Clovis greeted Lelouch cheerfully.

"Brother, I'm overjoyed to see you alive and well! Now we can return to our home country together!"

Lelouch found himself possessed of a sick urge to run outside, grab a Knightmare frame, and level that gun at his brother, just to see if he would feel threatened then.

He rolled his eyes, then activated his newfound power.

"Now, tell me. Who had my mother assassinated?"

He shrugged. "I dunno. I was hoping you did."

For the first time in his prince-in-exile-handsome-evil-genius-double-life, Lelouch Lampeouge was at a total loss for words.

"Ask Cornelia or Schneizer." Clovis continued.

"They did it?"

Clovis did not answer.

"You don't know very much, do you?" As if that was some surprise. He then opened fire, inwardly likening the deed to shooting a rabid dog, although without being an sickeningly overused subject for children's novels.

Back at Ashford Academy (Lelouch's High School)...

An attractive blonde haired student named Milly smacked Lelouch across the face with a rolled up piece of paper. "Lelouch, stay awake!"

Upon his enrollment at Ashford, Lelouch joined the student council, primarily to cement his reputation as "a normal, albeit ambitious student." It turned out, as usual, to be a bigger commitment than he previously thought. Mountains of paperwork, numerous meetings, and of course, planning the president Milly's next unnecessary festival (the next one was a celebration of a new pencil sharpener).

Leval smirked. "That's for ditching me."

"For the last time, man! The bike was fully functional!"

"I don't follow."

"Of course not."

Milly waved her paper. "C'mon, we have to balance the budget, get to work!"

Shirley, a friend of Lelouch, smiled. "Right away, Madam President!"

Milly returned the grin, hands on her hips. "Shirley, you're so nice and obedient."

She looked the girl up and down, moving closer to her face. "Not to mention, that awesome bod. You've filled out in all the right places. Nice rack, by the way."

Shirley covered herself with her hands, looking to her classmates. "Are you going to say anything about this?!"

Lelouch left off drooling a torrent. "Sure. Yeah. Uh huh. I agree."

Our protagonist's classroom was abuzz about an inevitably falsified news report about the activity in Shinjuku. People snuck nervous glances at the window, worried about the spread of poison gas.

Shirley tapped her friend on the shoulder. "Shinjuku?"

"Oh, I forgot, that's why I called you the other day. A friend told me about it in real time, and I was asking you if you had heard anything on the news about it." Lelouch replied.

As he spoke, his mind was at work. Why would they hide this? He wondered to himself. As he sat and thought, a sudden attack of nausea seized him. In a scene from a home movie gone wrong, Lelouch Lamperouge sprayed his classmates with the contents of his stomach. He smiled at the irate students innocently.

They must be covering up the truth about Clovis to hide the truth about Shinjuku and that girl, he thought. I guess I did some real damage.

At a Britannian military base...

The efforts of the army to investigate the Prince's assassination outraged Commander Jeremiah Gottwald, and his confidant Villetia Nu.

"Whoever did this, they tore through several layers of security at once, like they posed no obstacle to them at all."

"It was like that spy who hides in the cardboard boxes."

"Yeah, like Solid Serpent!"

Hey guys, guess what? If you don't say his name, you don't have to include a disclaimer!

Villetia Nu stroked her chin thoughtfully. "Still, without Prince Clovis, us purebloods in the army will end up overrun with-"

Jeremiah held a finger in her face. "Relax. I've got this covered."

Orange-kun x Villetia subtext count: 1

More next time.