Disclaimer: Not Mine. Duh.

Spoilers and other warnings: All aired episodes. This fic was born from the most ridiculous plot twist I could come with. While reading, keep in mind that it doesn't have to make sense.

A/N: the format is a newspaper article; I thought it would be funny to do.

The Miami Sun

Attack of the Fifty-foot Steler

City in terror!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Miami, Fl- A fifty-foot IAB Agent Rick Steler attacked he city of Miami yesterday. It seems that the agent's over inflated ego caused him to mutate into a fifty-foot monster. Sources close to the department claim the only thing that changed was his height.

The agent went on a rampage that resulted in millions of dollars worth of damage. At least three have been reported dead, including Detective Jake Berkley, who was attempting to calm the creature down. He will be missed, by some more then others. His girlfriend, Calliegh had this to say. "I don't think the incident surprised anyone. Jake was fighting the inevitable." She broke down into tears and was comforted by her friend and college, Eric Delko.

Agent Steler was apparently trying to find 'something to finally put Horatio Caine in his place.' He was attacking Yelina Salis, a local P.I.

She and her young son were in fear for their lives when the Agent was finally brought down by the man who is only know to us as Super H. He and his mighty Sunglasses of Justice brought Rick's ego back under control.

When asked what his real name was, he said, "I'm sorry, M'am, but I can't tell you my secret identity." He went to say that he was "Just doing my job."

-Erica Sikes

A/N: Thanks for reading. Please leave me a review. Tell me I'm nuts, tell me I'm brilliant, or even tell me what you had for dinner. I love hearing from you.