Hello! So don't know if you guys remember me, or my little story! But yes I'm updating it… it's not very long but it's something. I wanna say a huge thank you to Ave- as always for being my beta and also for taking me back after such a long break of no communication! You know I still love ya hun, and the same goes for Shar… for prodding me back into the Townwood world! And lastly to FroggyJump for sending me a PM and letting me know that I still have readers and people who deserve an update!
Phew! A/N over with…on with the show!
Enjoy!
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Chapter 11- Take A Deep Breath
"Hey," he whispered back brushing her hair from her face, as her eyes fluttered open.
"Ryan?"
"It's me."
"You weren't here. I was trying to forget." Taylor's eyes fluttered close, as she mumbled, "I'm sorry," before she was taken by sleep.
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A strangled smile fell from your face,
oh it kills me that I hurt you this way.
The worst part is that I didn't even know…
It was early morning and the light from the rising sun was filtering in through the bedroom window as Ryan watched Taylor as she was sleeping, keeping track of the steady rise and fall of chest as she breathed softly. Smalls sighs escaped her lips every now and then and her brows would furrow. He wondered if she was dreaming and what she was dreaming of. Did it have to do with her apology?
They had moved apart again in the middle of the night. He had tried to reach for her several times during the night, when he had woken and felt cold without her pressed against him, but each time he would wake to find her out of his arms once again. It seemed that was the solution and the problem at the same time, she clearly wanted the space, so he gave it to her but it left him feeling disconnected.
It didn't feel right, and he wanted to know why. But as she was sleeping he wasn't going to be getting his answers anytime soon, so he got up and made his way to the kitchen. The whole time he was thinking about what it was Taylor could have done to feel the need to apologise.
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She awoke to bright light pouring in from the window. She hated the light, she hated the pounding in her head, she hated the taste in her mouth. She pushed the covers off her hot body and looked to the empty side of the bed.
Last night was a blur, she couldn't even remember getting home let alone into bed, or if she had seen Ryan. She looked around the room and saw a pile of clothes on the floor. Sighing, she stared at them for what felt like forever, before she swung her feet round to sit up on the edge of the bed; never let it be known that a hangover would stop Taylor Townsend from cleaning up, the sarcastic voice in her head chirped. Taylor got up and bent down to pick up her jeans and shoes.
She moved around to the other side of the bed and there on the floor was another set of clothes, she took a deep breath and rubbed her aching forehead as she closed her eyes. Ryan, he must have seen her last night, before or after she got into bed she didn't know. Taylor bent down to pick up his shirt and then again to pick up his trousers, and as she did something fluttered out of the pocket and onto the floor at her feet.
Taylor looked at the folded piece of paper at her feet for a moment, as if surprised by its sudden appearance, before placing the bundle of clothes she had been holding in her arms onto the bed as she retrieved the fallen item.
She couldn't be sure but the paper felt as though it was hot in her hands, that if she opened it, it would burn her to the core. She sat down in the chair on one side of the room and looked at it again, debating with herself as to whether or not to open it. She had never once in their entire relationship looked through Ryan's things. Well, not since it turned out what she believed to be incriminating evidence led to his Dad. Then again, since that moment she never had a reason to go snooping through his things, until now.
In the end curiosity won out and she slowly opened it.
It was a photo, if it had been of anyone else, any other person's photo she may have smiled a little. But she didn't, instead she felt the first sting of tears blur the edges of her vision. The picture of a smiling Therese cradling a screaming Ry in the baby bath blurred as more tears pooled in her eyes. As much as it hurt, Taylor couldn't stop looking at the picture, and the hot tears fell, their tracks burning along her cheeks.
Now there's a million reasons for you to go…
She watched him staring out the kitchen window above the sink, cradling a cup of steaming coffee, strong, black, just how he liked it, in his hands. He wasn't facing her completely but she could tell that the smallest of smiles was gracing his face.
For an instant she was pulled back to one of their first moments in their apartment together.
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She was wearing a pair of his boxers and one of his old college t-shirts. They were in the midst of unpacking still and instead of finding clothes of her own, she had just made use of his. Besides they weren't planning on leaving the apartment at all that weekend, there was no opening the door to visitors, no answering of calls. It was just the two of them.
She walked into the kitchen to find him nursing a cup of coffee, strong, black, just the way he liked it, and looking out of the window above the sink. She came up behind him and wrapped her arms around his naked torso, pressing herself into him, her cheek resting on his shoulder blade and she took a deep breath.
She could have happily lived in that moment forever. She closed her eyes and burned the moment to memory.
His large hand covered her smaller one where it rested on his chest, squeezing just a little.
"Hey," she could hear the smile in his voice.
"Hey, yourself." She plucked the cup of coffee out of his hands and stood on tiptoes to drink a bit over his shoulder, before giving it back. "Someone in need of a pick me up this morning?" She teased.
"Well, after last night, you could say I need some." She hummed against his back as she resumed her previous position and let the feelings of the night before wash over her.
"Don't think it's over, we still have four more rooms to go."
"Four?"
"The dining room, living room, hall way and right here, the kitchen." She began to pepper butterfly kisses across his shoulder.
"You're counting the hallway as a room?" The vibrations from the deep, rough rumble of his voice tingled on her lips.
"Why not? It's still a place we have yet to christen, so I'm counting it." Her hand moved over the ridges of his stomach, hovering dangerously close to the waistband of his sweat pants. "Wanna get started?"
"You not worn out?" He chuckled and she felt the vibrations to her core.
"Are you?" She countered, and he turned to face her. Placing his coffee on one side, he put his arms around her lazily, his hands resting at the bottom of her spine just above her butt.
"You're insatiable." Then he kissed her, slow and languidly in the morning sunlight, his hands finding the end of his t-shirt she was wearing. He pulled it higher, breaking their kiss just long enough to pull it over her head. They stood together, in the home they were going to make their own, skin to skin.
He walked her back to the counter separating the kitchen from the dining room. Carefully lifting her as though she were the most precious thing in the world to him, like one rough move would break her, he placed her on the worktop and settled himself between her thighs. She felt the cool of the marble through the thin material of the boxers she was wearing, but the soft caresses of his hands on her inner thighs warmed her.
He nudged her head to one side to give him better access to her neck and she was in heaven. He teased her, running his hands up and down her thighs, stopping just short of where she needed him the most. She almost cried when he took his hands away completely.
He ran his hands up her sides, brushing his thumbs along her ribcage, before he finally cupped her breasts. He returned to kissing her, swallowing all the sounds she made as he brushed her nipples. She pulled him closer with her feet, gaining friction where she needed it the most. Her hands ran down his back to the tops of his trousers and then began pushing them down, using her feet to move them further.
He kicked off his trousers and pulled back to look at her face. Her eyes were half closed, her face flushed and her lips swollen, and he had never thought she looked more beautiful.
"Ryan," she almost whimpered. He pulled at the tops of the boxers she was wearing and she lifted her hips to allow him to remove them completely. He bent and kissed her knee, then her inner thigh, his hands once again following closely behind. He stood straight and watched her face as he touched her. She gripped his shoulders and her head fell back.
She was close and he stopped. He pulled her to the edge of the worktop and once again positioned himself between her legs. He waited for her to look at him, and when her eyes locked with his he thrust forward, joining them together completely. Ryan moved slow at first, taking his time feeling her all around him, until it became too much and the sound of her saying his name over and over again in his ear was too much to bear. His movements became quicker, more erratic as both he and Taylor went over the edge.
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They had nothing to worry about then, it was a time when they were just blissfully happy. Two people in love, starting out the beginning of their lives together; beginning to build a home.
Now, everything was different, they were in the same room but so far apart. She had stopped being able to talk to him the moment he started keeping things from her, and she knew he had. She saw it on his face after he had come from dinner with Theresa and Ry, the evidence was feeling heavy in her hand.
She knew him, she could read his actions, they spoke so much louder then the words he didn't say. She knew he wanted what she couldn't give him, so she knew what she had to do; to be fair to herself and to him.
She looked down at the picture in her hand once more, just to steady her resolve, carefully folding it along its crease, and putting it in her back pocket before walking into the kitchen fully.
Taylor stood behind one of the bar stools, gripping its steel frame just to stop herself from running into his arms and letting him change her mind. He must have heard her come in as he turned to face her.
She could do this; just take a deep breath and break your heart.
TBC
Um, yeah… so review- please?