A/N: This chapter is just leading up to what is to come. It's mostly intertwined with what we see in the movie/musical but is expressed through Mimi's point of view with her thoughts. DISCLAIMER: I do not own RENT.

Seeing Angel's life slowly seep out of her was too much for me, and now Roger's mad at me. I heard he's leaving. I have to get the facts straight—for my sake. Collins laid the final rose upon Angel's grave. The rest of us began to march away. I hustled; it was too painful.

"It's true you sold your guitar and bought a car?" I asked.

"It's true. I'm leaving now for Santa Fe," He grumbled. The words ripped my heart into pieces. Those words froze into my mind. "It's true you're with this yuppie scum?" He asked hatefully. He was talking about Benny. Of course we had something together, but that was long before I met Roger. I did lie about the dinner night with Benny. Things really did happen. Roger doesn't realize I did it for him, for us. Not taking sides, but Benny has been far more supportive than Roger.

"You said you'd never speak to him again!" Benny added.

"Not now!" I yelled. Benny wasn't the best at timing things. I rubbed my forehead as I was breaking out in a cold sweat. I need another hit. I can feel it. My body craves it. If I don't get it I could shut down.

I tried to clear my mind of anything about drugs but it wasn't working well.

"Who said you had any say in who she says things to at all?" Maureen mouthed.

"Who said you should stick your nose in other people's business?" Joanne asked.

"Who said I was talking to you?" Maureen opposed again.

"We used to have this fight each night…she never admit I existed!" Joanne explained. This scenario sounded so familiar to me. I turned to meet Joanne, nodding my head.

"He was the same way!" I noted, pointing to Roger angrily. "He was always 'runaway, hit the road, don't commit', you're full of shit!" I shouted it at his face. I could feel my blood boiling. Benny grabbed my wrist and pulled me away from Roger. Roger just turned his head hurtfully as my words smacked him. Maybe he'd see my point.

We all fought about it more before Collins stepped in. Poor Collins, he just lost the love of his life and now all of his friends were fighting.

"I can't believe this is goodbye…" We all sang together. Roger left quickly. Maureen comforted Joanne, wiping her tears. I wish I had someone to wipe my tears away—a shoulder to cry on. Anything would be nice. Instead Benny brushed me away from Roger. I couldn't help but to look back at the rock-star once more. We met eyes. My emotions were running cold. I was crying but I wasn't sure why anymore. Benny just led me out of the cemetery with one arm wrapped around my waist.

"Let's get you home." He murmured, pushing the wet strands of hair hanging in my face behind my ear. I lit up a cigarette before we got back to the loft.

The next thing I remember was waking up on my bed. I was still in the clothes I wore to the funeral. It was dark outside. I hoped to God that Roger hadn't left yet. Maybe if I go apologize he'll stay with me. Walking to the door my body throbbed and ached. Somehow I fought through the pain. Maybe it was Roger…

Approaching the sliding door to their loft I could hear Mark and Roger arguing more.

"I hear there are great restaurants out west…" Mark commented.

"Some of the best. How could she?" Roger asked in denial. Maybe he was talking about what I did at the funeral. I could feel my eyes welling with tears; the ache in my heart was coming back. He wasn't even gone and I was already longing for him.

"Mimi's gotten thin! Mimi's running out of time and you're running out the door?" I could hear Mark screaming at Roger.

"No more!" Roger yelled. "I got to go." He whispered. My heart sank. He really was leaving.

"Hey! For someone who's always been let down who is heading out of town?" It was Mark.

"For someone who's always longed for a community of his own, who's with his camera alone?" Roger mouthed. "I'll call…ugh, I hate the fall." He muttered. Suddenly the door swung open. Roger seemed stunned.

"You heard?" He asked.

"Every word…"