NOTE: Due to a small yet significant misunderstanding on my part about the relative merits of an M rating vs. an MA rating, I am voluntarily censoring the last two parts of this story. For the uncensored version, please see Adult (no space) Fan (no space) Fiction (dot) Net under "A Very Good Occlumens" or under the pen name Ink Stained Wretch (no under 18). You'll also find another story by me there.
Lily Lives
Voldemort raised his wand with cold intent. Lily leaped. Too soon. Voldemort waited the crucial half second, then screamed, "Avada Kedavra!" It all happened in a second. The green bolt shot from Voldemort's wand at the toddler in his crib behind Lily. Lily's body sprawled over the crib. The child flinched unconsciously, and the green bolt narrowly grazed his forehead, and bounced off the wall, showering sharp fragments of plaster, metal and debris everywhere, before striking the Dark Lord. With a scream, he disappeared.
Moments later, a dark, bat-like figure Apparated in front of the house and paused before the wide-open front door before racing inside. He nearly tripped over James's prone body in the entry. Crouching down, panting hard, he felt for a pulse at James's neck and found none. He ran into the nursery. The boy was standing in his crib, crying. The dark figure ignored him and flew to the side of the woman.
He put his hand at her neck and found what he was searching for. His shoulders under his wraith-like cloak slumped. Then he began chanting the healing charms in a monotone that belied any fear or concern. After a few moments, Lily stirred.
"My baby," she said in a weak, panicky voice. She opened her eyes. "Severus? Where's Harry?"
Snape rose, snatched the child from his crib, pushed him into Lily's arms, then grasped them both and turned on the spot. When they came out the other end, he lifted both mother and child in his arms and carried them into St. Mungo's.
One week later
Lily stirred. "Feeling better now, dearie?" a nurse said kindly.
"W-what's happened?' Lily replied faintly.
"You're at St. Mungo's," the nurse said. "Your baby's fine. See?" She held up the chubby child, who regarded her with serious green eyes. "And there's been a man coming here every day. A—" she lowered her voice, "—Death Eater. We tried to chase him off, but he's a powerful wizard, dearie. He's been at your bedside every day. Oh, here he is now."
Snape appeared, as if from nowhere. "Lily," he said, seating himself by her bedside. "Are you feeling better?"
"Yes." Memories of what had happened before she lost consciousness came flooding back. James! her brain screamed. It seemed impossible that he was gone, but she knew he was, remembered the horrible thud his body had made as it hit the ground. She felt as if everything that was happening now was happening in slow motion. If only it would end... But though the vistas in her mind held only leaden bleakness, her body felt strong and getting stronger.
"I've come to take you out now."
Take her out? She registered only faint interest. She was slightly surprised to see Severus, a known Death Eater, sitting at her bedside, but then again, she remembered how close they had been as children. She nodded and sat up.
Snape helped her stand, but her balance was steady. He was secretly proud not to hear any whining from her, to see her stand straight and strong.
"My baby—Severus, I can't lift him."
After a moment's hesitation, Snape went to the child and lifted him in his arms. The boy twisted, trying to see Lily. "Mummy," he said clearly. Snape ignored him. They walked out together, Lily a bit slowly, Snape with his arm around her waist in support. Lily was surprised to find that he could easily support her weight. It gave her a measure of comfort, even though her brain was clattering about James and she felt on the verge of tears.
"I didn't realize you were so strong, Sev," she head herself murmur as they walked through the doorway. Something bloomed inside Snape's chest, a pleasant yet unwelcome feeling.
Once outside, Snape Apparated them to a sitting room. The room was shabby, with dark wood furniture carved fantastically, a worn Oriental carpet, and a small grate. In spite of its tired air, the room conveyed a certain comfort.
"Where are we?" she said calmly, as Snape gestured for her to have a seat in an overstuffed chair. His thoughts roiled. How best to approach it?
"We're going to meet with a member of the Order," he said. "Dumbledore."
"The Order? How do you know about the Order?" she said in alarm.
He smiled, not a nice one. "I'm a member of it."
"You? A Death Eater?"
"Not any more." He strode a few steps away, then a few steps back and knelt suddenly before her, taking her hand in his and studying it. He pressed it to his mouth, his black eyes full on hers. As he did so, his sleeve fell back, exposing the Dark Mark on his forearm. He could tell Lily saw it because she tried to jerk her hand away. He tightened his long fingers firmly around hers. "Lily, I'm the Dark Lord's most trusted adviser—and a spy for the Order."
Lily sat back in shock. Something, finally, had cut through the clatter of grief in her mind. After a moment, she said, almost to herself, "How can I believe you? You must be a great Occlumens, an incredible Occlumens, for the Dark Lord not to suspect you. How can I know if what you say is true? I've trusted the wrong people," she went on bitterly, looking away. "I trusted Peter Pettigrew."
"Damn Peter Pettigrew! Who do you think set up that house for you and James? Who do you think arranged for your protection? Look at me, Lily!" She did look at him then, the blazing black eyes, with no bottom to them. "See whether I'm telling the truth!"
Setting her mouth in a taut line, she drew together her strength, raised her wand, and said, "Leglimens"
He didn't raise his wand, nor utter any counterspell. "That's good," he said. "I knew you could do it. You have so much magic, Lily. I won't hold back. I won't shield my thoughts." What she didn't know was that Snape had no compunction about reading her mind while she read his.
She peered deep into the black depths of his eyes, unwavering and full on her for what felt like the first time.
She drew back and looked away. "Oh, Sev," she said, her face, if anything, more pale than before. Her thoughts boiled to the surface unwittingly, and Snape flipped through them, betraying nothing in his expression. Relief, he saw, but also something stranger, and at first he couldn't or wouldn't recognize it. Was it fear for him?
"Now," he said, "I have to ask something of you."
Slowly, she nodded once.
NOTE: Due to a small yet significant misunderstanding on my part about the relative merits of an M rating vs. an MA rating, I am voluntarily censoring the last two parts of this story. For the uncensored version, please see Adult (no space) Fan (no space) Fiction (dot) Net under "A Very Good Occlumens" or under the pen name Ink Stained Wretch (no under 18). You'll also find another story by me there.