Disclaimer: I don't own CL

Rating: Eh…PG because there's mild language.

Warnings: Language? Hints of slash, hints of het, hints of canon, hints of everything! Oh, yeah, and it's supposed to be funny for once.

Author's Note: I don't know if I'll actually add another chapter or not. I'm also not sure if I like how it ends, but whatever. Enjoy? My first attempt at actual humor in a long time and a different sort of writing style for me too. Yay!

Dedication: Rae who suggested the length. Myself for being insane enough to write it. And Ems for being the first to read and laugh at it.

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"What are you doing?"

"A survey, what's it look like I'm doing?"

"A…survey?"

"Yeah, for fun."

1. What is your full name?

Odd Della Robbia. The middle name will forever remain a mystery. Suffer.

"It said full name Odd. Don't you have a middle name?"

"No."

"Odd, everyone has a middle name."

"Not necessarily Jer. Anyway, my survey, my answers."

2. Were you named after anyone...who?

Yes! My Uncle Oddball. It's a family name…and he had discolored eyes…

"Liar! That's not true. You don't have an Uncle Oddball."

"And how would you know Ulrich-dear?"

"I told you to stop calling me that. And anyway, I have met your family, remember?"

"…Shut-up."

3. Where were you born?

In a…HOSPITAL! Hah, bet no one thought of that!

"Everyone was born in a hospital Odd, they mean country or hometown."

"Was I born in a hospital?"

"Of course you were Aelita."

4. Do you like where you live...why?

I live in a school. Who would want to live at SCHOOL?

"I volunteered to come here."

"That's because you're weird Ulrich."

"Thanks…"

5. Do you get along with your parents?

Perfectly well, since I hardly see them. Unlike Yumi who fights with hers all the time.

"Odd, I do not!"

"You always seem to."

"I do not fight with them all the time."

"Face it Yumi, you have a very confrontational personality."

6. Do you have any pets? Describe them...

Do I? I have the greatest little diggity dog ever! His name is Kiwi and he's absolutely adorable…Ulrich, stop making faces!

"Honestly, it was only once that he trashed the room."

"He ate my CD."

"He thought it was a bagel!"

"A…bagel?"

"Yes, a shiny, non-fluffy bagel…"

"Do you even listen to yourself speak?"

"You're distracting me!"

7. What is more difficult for you, looking into someone's eyes when you are telling someone how you feel, or looking into someone's eyes when they are telling you how they feel?

Uh…What kind of question is this?

"Why can't you answer the question Odd?"

"Shut-up Ulrich. I don't see you looking into Emily-slash-Sissi-slash-Yumi's eyes when you tell them how you feel. Or vice-versa."

"What, nothing to say?"

"Why won't you answer Odd?"

"Oh look, you've gotten Aelita started now!"

8. Think of the last time you were REALLY angry. WHY were you angry? Do you still feel the same way? If not WHAT CHANGED to make you feel differently?

Erm…Oh yeah! Sissi came up and called me a loser freak. I'm not angry about it anymore (well, I am now because I've thought of it again, thanks) because Yumi walked in on Ulrich and I…

"What? Stop staring at me like that!"

"Odd…no one wants to know."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive."

"I want to know!"

"No you don't Aelita, no you don't."

"Oh…Why is Odd laughing like that?"

8. You are on a flight from Honolulu to Chicago non-stop. There is a fire in the back of the plane. You have enough time to make ONE phone call. Who do you call? What do you say to them?

Er…Ulrich. Because he knows how to get in contact with everyone else. Anyway, he's my best buddy so of course he'll be the last to hear my voice…

"Should I feel honored?"

"Yes, you should."

"As long as it wasn't me."

"Oh, that's hilarious Jer, never knew you had a sense of humor."

9. You are at the doctor's office and he has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? What do you do with your remaining days?

What happened to the EASY questions? What type of questions are these? Well…obviously I'll tell my lawyer dude (or girl-dude) – the one who draws up my will – and I guess my family so they can start planning my funeral…As for the remaining days uh, hopefully not be in the hospital? Definitely gonna go kick some XANA ASS!

"Odd!"

"What'd I do now?"

"You're posting that to the internet!"

"No one will know what a Xana is. Relax Jer…"

10. What side of the heart do you draw first?

Erm…I'm really missing those earlier questions here. The uh…right side?

"You really had to draw a heart to figure that out?"

"Yes I did."

"That's sad."

"Oh, yeah? Lets see you do it without drawing one Miss Perfect."

"Fine, left."

"…"

"Thought so."

11. Last phone call received?

Let me check…Oh, from my parents. They're worrying about my grades.

"They should worry about your sanity."

"That's enough Ulrich!"

"I'm only joking Odd."

"I know…but still."

12. You are unfaithful to your spouse/significant other. Do you tell him/her? Why or Why not?

Yeah, I would definitely tell. I have told. Not pretty, not fun. I got a black eye last time…

"You cheated on someone?"

"Ow Yumi, I didn't know your voice could go that high!"

"Why?"

"I found someone better…I told them!"

"That doesn't make it any better!"

"Yumi, you're talking about the guy who had two dates with two girls the same day…"

"Jeremie, what exactly is cheating?"

"Odd, stop laughing. Aelita, I'll….I'll tell you later."

13. Which is the best Spice Girl?

Finally, an easy question! Scary Spice, duh. She was the bomb!

"You did not just say that…"

"Say what? Scary Spice? You know I love all music and those girls had catchy lyrics!"

"No…the bomb."

"Oh…yeah. I didn't…"

14. Do you wear a lot of black?

NO. Black is so…boring. Like Yumi…just kidding Y! No, I wear a much better color – PURPLE!

"If you can call purple better…"

"Shut-up Yumi, I said I was kidding."

"Sure you were."

"I was!"

15. Imagine it is a dark night, you are alone, it is raining outside, you hear someone walking around outside your window. WHO do you wish was there with you?

First off, the only thing outside my window is air. Who ever was walking around there well, power to you peep! But let's say someone WAS then I'll say Ulrich cause he can go all ninja. Or Kiwi cause he can go all dog. Jer's useless…he'd go nerd. Aelita could probably take them on though and Yumi'd just let me fend for myself after the last question.

"That is true."

"Which part, the one where there's air outside our window or the one where Yumi'd let me get attacked?"

"The part about Jeremie going "nerd"."

"Oh, ha-ha-ha. You two are hilarious."

"We love you too Jer."

"Jeremie, what's a nerd?"

"Someone like Jer."

"She asked me Odd, not you! I'll, uh, tell you later Aelita…"

16. How far have you gone with a boy?

(Psst…I am a boy) But with another boy? Germany…Norway…Bed…

"What?"

"Geez Jer, calm down. You look all red…don't burst a blood vessel! I had to share a bed with another guy once geez. You know these things are supposed to be funny!"

"Jeremie, how far have you gone with a boy?"

"That really doesn't matter Aelita."

17. Your best friend confesses that he/she has feelings for you more then just friendship. He/she is falling in love with you. What do you (or did you) do/say?

Gee Ulrich, never knew you felt that way. I don't know, I'm pretty open to new experiences. But he has Yumers over there so I shouldn't count on it.

"Odd! I can't believe you just said that!"

"Technically I typed it."

"It's still…"

"Calm down Yumi…Anyway, it's not like Ulrich actually did declare his undying love for me. Recently anyway."

"Hey, Odd?"

"Yeah Ulrich?"

"I love you. Shut-up."

"And I'm friends with you idiots, why?"

"You love us Yumi?"

18. How do you feel about carrots?

They have many uh…uses.

"What, no comments?"

"I think we're still in shock…"

19. Have you ever had a holiday romance?

Yes, I have. That is all you will know.

"With who?"

"That's confidential Aelita."

"Since when have you been confidential about your love life?"

"Actually Jer, he's very confidential about his life in general."

"Will you stop saying "confidential" it's weirding me out."

"Sorry Yumi…"

"So, Odd, who was it with?"

"It's confidential!"

20. You are holding onto your grandmother's hand and the hand of a newborn that you do not know as they hang over the edge of a cliff. You have to let one go to save the other. Who do you let fall to their death? What was your rationale for making the decision?

Argh! Why is the last question the hardest? Uh…neither, I use my super strength and…oh, alright, stop glaring at me like that Yumi, I know I'm supposed to pick one. What the hell is a new born and my grandmother doing falling off a cliff in the first place? And where's the newborn's parents, hm? Okay, okay. I would listen to whatever Gram told me and let go of the other…why wouldn't I be able to pull up an old woman and newborn again?

"Because you're scrawny."

"I wasn't asking you Jer, I was asking the computer!"

"And you expect it to…answer?"

"Yeah…no…it was rhetorical. Leave me alone."

"Nice survey Odd."

"Glad you think so. I just emailed it to you all. Looking forward to reading your answers!"

"ODD!"