#20 – Picture

Once, I woke up suddenly, my body automatically roused by his absence beside me, missing the warmth of him pressed to my skin. I waited a few minutes, unable to get back to sleep without him in my arms, but he didn't show. Worried, I pulled on my jeans and went searching for him. On the way, I passed Hakkai and Goku's room, and the door was slightly ajar… and I saw something there that made me stop in my tracks. I walked closer, making sure to step lightly, and just watched the sight, breathless. …He was sitting beside Goku's bed, a pale hand on the kid's forehead, and faintly by the light of the moon from the window I could see his lips moving, perhaps whispering a silent blessing. Well, I crept back to our room and waited patiently in bed for him, tenderness overwhelming me at the picture I'd witnessed. Goku at that time had been sick, a poisoned dart from the enemy, a dart that the kid had taken for Sanzo at the last moment by launching himself in front of his beloved Sun. Of course Hakkai had roomed with Goku, our healer best equipped to watch over the stupid sick monkey – but it was too sweet to think that Sanzo had gotten up in the deep of night, worried about his charge, and crept from our cozy lovenest to check on Goku. When he came back, I pretended to be asleep, "waking up" when he nudged me impatiently to move so he could rest his head on my shoulder. I "sleepily" mumbled something about him and his old man trips to the bathroom at night, and got the pinch on my nipple that I deserved. It didn't spoil the memory of that simple, sweet picture one bit, though.

It was one of those rainy nights. Even though he's cured me of my loathing for rain, I still appreciate his warm body and enjoy resting in his arms while listening to the patter of raindrops on the eaves, my sleep undisturbed by old nightmares. So that night, when I woke to find myself alone, curiosity and a strange instinct led me downstairs… I stayed in the shadow of the stairwell, and sure enough there he was with Hakkai, looking totally out-matched in their card game, and out-drank as well, because hell Hakkai never gets drunk, and there were enough bottles on the table between them to knock out even me. I stood there, in my jeans, barefoot, and felt a smile creeping to my lips at the very thought of it – that he would sneak away from me when I was safely asleep, even knowing that I still "needed" him on these rainy nights, to hold me and warm me up more than anything else, really – so to think that he had rightly judged that this time his best friend's need for company was greater – that Hakkai was still mourning a wound in his heart, whereas Gojyo and I had so much together – it was his lion heart all over again, and the picture of him daring my wrath (to his mind, anyway, without knowing how deeply the picture affected me quite to the contrary, provoking tenderness instead of rage) – the picture of him being there for his best friend gave me yet another glimpse into the warm and generous and kind heart of this devil who is my lover… By the time he'd finally crashed back into bed with me, and with the undeniable stench of alcohol and cigarettes, I could feel how tense he was, expecting me to rail about him fooling around on me. He got the shock of his life, let me assure you, when I pounced on him – stinking and dazed as he was – and covered him with kisses, the lingering picture of Gojyo the loyal best friend for life burning brightly behind my closed eyes.

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TBC!

Next time: Fool, Mad, Child, Now, Shadow, Goodbye, Hide, Fortune, Safe, and Ghost.

Thanks for reading.

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