Anaisthitos (loveless)

A/N: Don't worry, there is no greek in the story, besides the title (if it is mistranslated, please tell me ). Hey, this is my second Shika-Tem fic. Right now I am pretty busy starting high school, so I am not sure when I will be able to update (pretty soon). This first chapter is going to be kind of cornily emotional, but please hang with me, I promise it will get better. I first got the idea for this fic when I was listening to music (as it usually happens) by Garbage and Dream. Don't ask me how. As always, I had trouble with the title, so I might change it (I'll need suggestions, though). Please read and review, even only to flame it.

Freezing water seared and soothed his feet, causing both pain and comfort at the same time. The river's current gently pulled at Shikamaru's legs, like a woman tugging on her lover's hand, beckoning him to follow her. Feet just dangling there, the lazy ninja sat, shoulders drooped, on the riverbank, staring listlessly ahead, with his chin resting on a single cupped hand. Fluffy clouds floated above him, yet he paid them no attention. For once in his life, Shikamaru couldn't relax. He couldn't explain it. Something wasn't right with him.

A troubling emptiness had been growing inside him, gnawing at his core. He was still the bored genius around his friends, but... he didn't always feel that way all the time. Shikamaru could not go to get barbecue with Chouji or be dragged to one of Ino's favorite new designer stores without getting the same nagging impression. Increasingly and increasingly he felt the sensation that something was missing in his life. Something feminine.

Eyebrows slightly furrowed, brown orbs downcast, Shikamaru contemplated his girl problems for what had to be the thousandth time that week. It's not like I don't know what I'm missing... It seems like everybody's started hooking up. Ino's had, what, like six boyfriends in the last three months? Naruto and Hinata, they make a good couple. Hell, I heard that even Shino's been seen eating lunch with some kunoichi. Not to mention, pfff... every woman and girl in Konoha between the ages of 10 and 25 are rejoicing the fact that Sasuke's icy view of them is starting to thaw. Ne, how troublesome...

Shikamaru sighed and took his numb feet out of the ice water. Purple splotches covered them, and they throbbed, but he didn't care. Despite his disgust with his own vanity, Shikamaru stared bleakly down at the reflection framed on the surface of the river. At fifteen, Shikamaru thought of himself as neither ugly nor handsome, but somewhat dull looking. I'm not exactly the type of guy that most girls want as a boyfriend. Lazy and boring. I won't get any woman like that...

Angrily shaking the thoughts of self-pity from his head, Shikamaru refused to feel sorry for himself. Remembering the calming effect of the river, the depressed shinobi looked down at the water. I'm gonna need to get more than just my feet wet. Carefully laying his Chuunin vest on the grass, Shikamaru closed his eyes before wading out into the river. As the frigid liquid reached his stomach, he let out a sharp gasp, but continued on. He only stopped when the water was up to his neck, feeling a strange sense of relief in the numbness of his body, Shikamaru exhaled before undoing his hair tie, throwing it back on the riverbank and dunking his head. All around him, the current swirled, and several trout swam in place lazily several feet from him. He remained submerged in his state of blissful senselessness until his body begged for oxygen.

Finally, he resurfaced, ears popping, and filled his lungs with air. Satisfied, he returned to land and shook his hair like a dog before tying it back up. Looking down at his drenched clothing, Shikamaru groaned to himself. Mom's gonna kill me. Shivering, the lazy ninja scooped up his vest and headed home.

Walking through the streets, Shikamaru noticed that the golden Konoha sun was starting to set. He hadn't realized how long he'd been gone. When he'd left his house it had been a brisk spring morning. Crap, Mom's gonna kill me, resurrect me, and kill me again... Grimacing, Shikamaru rounded a street corner and froze in his tracks, eyebrows twitching in disbelief. There, in front of a ramen shop, stood the fangirl magnet himself, Uchiha Sasuke, surrounded by a harem of no less than twenty girls. Shit, I wonder if it's too late to go back and jump in the river again... Mood darkened by this sight, Shikamaru attempted to sneak past unnoticed, grumbling to himself. Taking one last glance back, he noticed a familiar blond head. Before he could stop himself, he called out.

"Oy, Ino!" His teammate turned her head in annoyance, but reluctantly came over when she saw who it was.

"Hey Shika, what's up? Er... Why are you all wet?" She examined his appearance only for a moment before antsily looking back at the crowd which surrounded Sasuke. Shikamaru could tell she wanted to return.

"Hn, long story. But, hey, what happened to what's-his-face, your new boyfriend, I thought you two were getting serious." He could see her tapping her feet impatiently.

"Oh, Taido. We're totally through. When word came out that Sasuke was putting himself on the market, I dumped Taido. He was a jerk anyways. Well, I gotta go, Sasuke says he's going to eat dinner with one girl and he's choosing now. See you later!" Without waiting for a response, she rushed back to the swarm of squealing girls gathered around "Mr. Hunksicle".

Fighting jealousy, Shikamaru thrust his hands deep into his pockets and continued on home, determined to keep a bored, indifferent expression plastered on his face. Why is it that almost every girl I know is obsessed with Sasuke? It's disgusting the way they drool over him, the way they drop everything and rush to him whenever he's around. Seems like almost every girl in Konoha is nothing but a fickle fangirl. A sick feeling in the pit of his stomach, Shikamaru made a silent vow. I'm not gonna let any of this effect me. It's all too troublesome. If I don't fall for any girls, then there is no way that I can feel this way. That's all there is to it. No more getting caught up in bimbos.

Frown changing into a resigned expression, Shikamaru looked up at the sky. The clouds were a beautiful pinkish orange. Staring past them to the faint shape of the moon that was starting to appear, the spiky haired chuunin softly murmured an inquiry to the heavens.

"There's gotta be a couple of girls that aren't like that, right?"

He received no answer. What did I expect? Baka... Eyes downcast, Shikamaru walked the last few blocks back home in silence. As he walked up the front steps, a frying pan flew out the open window and struck him in the face. His eyes crossed and he toppled backwards, hitting his head on the bottom step.

"SHHHIIIKKKAAMMMAAARRRUUU!!!" His mother's angry face appeared out the window. Oh right, almost forgot. Unnn...

Quickly rising, the leaf nin had to perform a set of strange dance-like maneouvres to avoid more projectiles. Dodging a toaster and a ladle, Shikamaru entered his house and angrily took a blender from his assailant's hand. His mother only glared.

"Where have you been? Dinner's getting cold, you were supposed to do the laundry and take out the trash, not to mention–" She stopped in mid sentence when she noticed that he was sopping wet.

"BAKA BAKA BAKA! You're dripping on my best rug! What happened? You have a lot of explaining to do, Shikamaru!" Wearily, Shikamaru explained that he had just been relaxing and had felt like taking a swim in the river. He left out the part about being depressed, and the nausea he'd felt on the way back. After the story, the silence between the two was broken when Shikamaru's stomach growled louder than Akamaru. Yoshino gave her son one last smack upside the head before herding him into the dining room. Thank Kami she didn't ask any questions. Despite the aching imprint of a frying pan on his face, Shikamaru could not help but cheer up at the thought of eating. Damn, I'm hungry. NEEEED FOOOOD.

Shikamaru groaned loudly in annoyance when he caught sight of what was on the table. A single bowl of cold Champon was all that remained of dinner in Shikamaru's empty place. In the spot next to it, heaps of dirty dishes and platters were stacked precariously, looking as if they were about to tumble over at any moment. Shikaku lay back in his chair, the top button of his pants undone to release his comically large gut. When he caught sight of his son's expression, Shikaku chuckled gleefully. Rising slowly, the lazy father patted his stomach and then ruffled Shikamaru's hair.

"Sorry, boy. You snooze, you lose." Before Shikamaru could reply, his mother's voice came from the kitchen.

"Shikaku! You're on dish duty!" Shikamaru smirked at his father and made a whipping motion. Shikaku only grumbled before calling back reluctantly.

"Coming, dear!"

As his dad scurried from the room, Shikamaru sat down to his bowl of noodles, smile turning back into a frown. Stifling a yawn, the leaf nin gulped the Champon down wolfishly before deciding to turn in for the night.

He stumbled up the stairs and into his room, almost tripping over a pile of dirty clothes on the ground. Cursing, he hastily stripped off his long sleeve black shirt and pants and added them to the mound o' stink. Stretching, he flung his hair tie onto his bedside table before approaching his bed. Tired and cold from his dip in the river, Shikamaru threw back the covers and collapsed face down on his pillow. Groaning, he turned onto his side and pulled the comforter up to his neck. A glow caught his eye. Propping his head up with one hand, he stared out at the sand-yellow moon which illuminated the midnight sky, casting pale rays through the window and onto his bed. There has to be some girl for me. They can't all be the same, can they?

Eyelids drooped and finally closed, as Shikamaru left the moon to contemplate his rhetorical question. Shikamaru dreamt of cold water and clouds.

A/N: Well that's chapter one. I know that it's quite short, but chapter two will be up soon (maybe even tomorrow). Also, for those of you wondering, chapter three of my Teen Titan's fic Acid Burn will be up in about a week (I'm in a bit of a rut motivation wise). Thanks for reading

- Iwannabeamongoose