Hoggy Warty Hogwarts

By: P.E.E.V.S.Y.

Minerva McGonagall had always hated the school song. Ever since she had first heard it at the age of 11, she had absolutely despised it. After all, what sort of song had no set tune? And, as if that wasn't enough, the rhythm was positively appalling! And it didn't even have a sort of rhyme or beat to it at all!

However, the week after the Battle of Hogwarts, random phrases from the song would assault her at the oddest moments. Minerva always pushed them aside unceremoniously. She would then quickly busy herself with one of the many tasks that had to be accomplished. In fact, it wasn't until the Memorial Service for all those who had given up their lives in the two wars that Minerva allowed herself to think of the song at all.

Like at Dumbledore's funeral, the words the man was saying had little to no importance to Minerva. But only after she had resigned herself to a meaningless service did she allow those hated verses to float through her head. With them came the strangest memories…

Hogwarts, Hogwarts, Hoggy Warty Hogwarts,

It was her first day at Hogwarts and her eleven-year-old self was staring up incredulously at the batty Professor with the long auburn hair. Their awful, unorganized, and loud singing had brought tears to his eyes. Tears! Minerva remembered wondering if he was quite right in the head…

Teach us something please,

Faces of students flashed past Minerva's eyes: Hermione Granger, who was so eager to learn anything and everything that anyone would teach her… Neville Longbottom, who, despite trying with all his might, couldn't help but to cause another disaster each day in class… Sirius Black, the boy who was convinced he knew everything and then was shocked to learn that he did not…

Whether we be old and bald,

Cornelius Fudge ringing his silly bowler hat and desperately pleading, "He can't be back, Dumbledore. He just can't," He had obviously needed a bit more education, Minerva thought disdainfully.

Or young with scabby knees,

11-year-old Nymphadora Tonks tripping a grand total of six times, accidentally knocking three people to the ground, banging into two tables three times each, and finishing the fiasco off by falling over the stool… all in the five minutes it had taken her to walk to the front to be sorted….

For now they're bare and full of air,

Dead flies and bits of fluff,

15-year-old Dorcas Meadowes whispering to a 14-year-old Minerva: "Honestly! I swear that Professor Merrythought was born without a brain!" as the then Defense Professor wildly made up an answer to a question. An answer that both fourth years knew was wrong. The two best friends giggled in the back of the classroom at the thought…

So teach us things worth knowing,

Friendship like Ronald Weasley's, Hermione Granger's and Harry Potter's… Loyalty like Sirius Black's… Love like that of Lily Potter's for her baby son… Determination like young Colin Creevey's… Wisdom like Dumbledore's… Courage like Severus Snape's…

Bring back what we've forgot,

Joy, Laughter and Peace…

Just do your best,

The statues and suits of armor rising up to defend their school because of Godric Gryffindor's ancient enchantments… The archaic wards and deep magic that Rowena Ravenclaw had set up to protect the students long after her own death… The grounds themselves rising up in rebellion just as Helga Hufflepuff had promised… The ancient Room of Requirement created by Salazar Slytherin hiding students from those who wished to harm them…

We'll do the rest,

Neville Longbottom, Luna Lovegood and Ginny Weasley enraging the Carrows and rallying the students… Michael Corner bravely facing the punishment for doing the right thing… Colin Creevey who had refused to leave… Plump Molly Weasley defeating the proud and unstoppable Bellatrix Lestrange…Sybil Trelawny hurling crystal balls at any Death Eater she could reach… Pomona Sprout sending Mandrakes into the Death Eaters' ranks… Fred and George Weasley putting all their years of mischief making and sneaking into protecting every last secret passageway… The Hogsmeade villagers rushing to their aid… The centaurs revealing their alliances at last… and young Harry Potter defeating one of the greatest Dark Lords history had ever known…

And learn until our brains all rot!

"But Professor!" 15-year-old James Potter had cried dramatically, "I can't possibly take my O.W.L.'s! Not a chance! My brain has rotted away from all this studying…"

Minerva slowly came back to the present and found that the service had ended and people were beginning to leave.

She had tear tracks and a small smile on her face. Minerva imagined that she must look like Dumbledore did whenever he heard the school song bellowed out by the many students. And, for the first time in Minerva McGonagall's life, she thought she could understand why that silly old song had brought tears to Albus Dumbledore's eyes.

As she stood up and slowly made her way out of the clearing, she wondered what her 11-year-old self would say if she knew…

The End

A/N: This all of a sudden just hit me when I was taking a shower and I had to write it down. I hope you like it, but if it's okay if you don't. I'd appreciate it if you left a review saying which one it is though! Thanks for reading!

-P.E.E.V.S.Y.