Chapter I
Kenny McCormick always had the best parties. Sure, his house was small, dingy and smelt worse than Eric Cartman's fat ass, but none of that mattered, not since Kenny always had enough free booze for everyone. No one knew how Kenny could ever afford it, but at each and every one of his parties there was plenty of beer and vodka, and everyone was welcomed in.
No matter how well you knew Kenny or how much you hated the poor blond, you would never turn down an invitation to his famous booze bashes. Even some of the most unpopular boys in South Park showed up: Leopold "Butters" Stotch, Tweek Tweak and most notably, Philip "Pip" Pirrup.
One of everyone's favourite aspects of Kenny's parties – aside from all the drunken fun – Was watching Pip Pirrup and Kenny McCormick together.
Pip had always come to Kenny's parties, even though Kenny's friends forever taunted him and called him French. Even Timmy could tell that Pip adored the blond, partying boy. Pip was willing to be insulted and beat up by Kenny's best friends, just for the chance to be near Kenny himself. The little Brit's presence seemed welcomed by Kenny, who had been openly bisexual since mid-ninth grade.
Finally, around the time the boys entered the tenth grade, Kenny asked Pip on a date to the movies.
"M-me?" Pip had stuttered.
"No, the Pip behind you."
Pip had turned and looked behind him, and from that moment on he and Kenny were together. Rumours flooded South Park on how far they had gone together, all knew Pip was as much a virgin as one could get, whereas Kenny… No one truly knew for sure, but every boy in town at some point borrowed something from his vast porno collection, except for Pip of course.
It was a late Friday evening and Kenny's parents passed out in their bedroom while tens of teenagers drunk and partied in the McCormick living room. Kenny, with a bottle of beer in one hand, lounged and laughed with his friends on the old, stained sofa. As usual, Pip stood ten feet away, watching the boy he adored, but keeping his distance from Kenny's foul-mouthed friends.
"…And so I told that bitch, you're an Uncle Fucker! And now she won't fuck me!"
"You're such a dumbass, Cartman." Stan rolled his eyes at his fat friend before wrapping an arm around Wendy Testaburger, his long-time girlfriend who sat beside him and Kenny on the old sofa, playing with Stan's dark, shoulder-length hair. Kenny eyed the couple, smirking, before he called Pip.
"Pip! Get your cute ass over here, I miss you!"
Pip blushed quickly as heads turned to watch the couple interact. Pip quickly walked to the sofa and turned to sit next to Kenny, when Kenny grabbed him by his hips, pulling the terrified Brit onto his lap.
"Eek!"
"Don't you want to sit on my lap babe?"
"My, you smell of beer…"
Kenny pouted.
"Oh! Yes, yes I am fine here, Kenneth."
"Good." Kenny wrapped his arms around Pip's lithe waist.
"Ew, Kenny, you have a French fag on your lap!" Cartman laughed, followed by giggles from those listening.
"I'm NOT fre- Mmhm!"
Kenny, at that point hardly conscious of what was being said after his sixth beer, forced his lips onto those of Pip's, trying to silence him.
"Aw, dude!" Cartman made a face.
Kenny finally pulled away, leaving a shocked Pip gasping. Kenny relaxed back into the sofa, still holding his now half-empty beer in one hand and grabbing a still shaken Pip's tense ass with his free hand.
Oh bother, he's doing it again. I love Kenneth oh so much, but when he drinks at his silly parties, he changes!
I'll admit, the feel of Kenneth's slender fingers squeezing at my rear is not a bad feeling at all! However, in front of oh so many people… It is strange! I could feel Kenneth's friend, Kyle, his gaze on where Kenneth's hand was the entire him, it was a tad embarrassing.
Kenneth's kisses taste foul when he drinks as much as he does. Kenneth can't quite tell what he's doing, I don't think, as sometimes he will shove his tongue in my ear! I think he was aiming for my mouth, oh dear.
"Oh!" Pip jumped when Kenny began to work at taking the young Brit's pants off. Kenny was having more trouble than he thought at finding the zipper to Pip's pants, thanks to six beers, giving Pip the time to slap Kenny's hand away. Pip looked up briefly to see all of Kenny's close friends staring wide-eyed at the two of them.
"Kenny, maybe you've had too much to drink…" Kyle tried to take the beer out of Kenny's hand, but Kenny kicked Kyle away.
"This isn't for me… It's for Pip!" Kenny put the bottle to Pip's lips.
"Oh, no, I couldn't!"
Kenny's friends watched in amazement as Kenny forced the bottle into Pip's mouth, tipping the contents in. Pip was not a drinker and quickly spat the beer out, making a face at the revolting taste left in his mouth.
"That's it!" Kyle jumped to his feet again, this time slapping the beer bottle away from both Pip and Kenny. Kenny simply giggled.
"Kenny, you're going to bed. I'll clean up after the party, you're way too wasted." Kyle pushed Pip off of Kenny and grabbed Kenny by his arm, dragging the giggling, drunken blond up to his bedroom. Pip followed behind to assure Kenny was doing well.
"You keep a watch on him, okay?" Kyle asked as he forced Kenny onto the mattress that was on the floor that served as Kenny's bed.
"Right-o."
"I'm going back to the party." Kyle left the room. The door hadn't even clicked shut behind him before Kenny grabbed Pip's leg, pulling Pip on top of him.
"Mmhm, how are you cutie?"
"S-smashing, Kenneth." Pip smiled shyly.
"You look so sexy tonight, are you trying to tease me?"
"Oh dear me no!"
Kenny grinned and rolled Pip over, making himself on top before he kissed the quivering Brit, who was much more willing to receive the kiss now in the privacy of Kenny's bedroom, without Kyle or Cartman's disgusted eyes watching.
"Mmm, do all you Brits taste so good?"
Pip flushed pink and smiled up at the drowsy drunk that he treasured so much.
"Hey, Pip?"
"Yes Kenneth?"
"Let's fuck."
"Oh, bother…"