1Title: Forgiven
Warning: Implied Adult Situations. Language. Lime/Lemony-ish.
Disclaimer: Me no own NARUTO, damn it.
Distribution: Nebeh. Read Bio. Okay...?, good.
A/N: God damn it, I feel like I'm getting no where. Stand My Ground Chapter 23 had stumped the heck out of me. I know where I want it to go, I know how I want it to end, but I can't seem to get it there! Mrrfhgf. Stupid chapter. Anyway, here's another candy for my road block, so to speak. Maybe if I fuel it with enough candy it will dissolve into a useless cavity-ridden ex-blocky thing and leave me alone? Let us hope. Enjoy.
--
There were moments Haruno Sakura could fool herself.
Now was one of those moments. His lips attacked hers, leaving them bruised from the force. She paid no heed to this, and excitedly, sorrowfully worked on getting his shirt over his head. She knew this would be over much too soon.
It had been like this for a month. He'd come a few times a week, and when she woke up, he'd be gone. Everytime she went to sleep, worming her way as close to him as she thought he could stand, she regretted it in the morning when the part of the bed she'd come to call his was cold.
But then, later the next night, or the night after that, she'd be back to woefully basking in his presence, moving to his rhythm, and breathing in tune with his ragged breaths. She partly understood that she was just a tool. She was just a.. device to help him feel. Feeling in general she knew had grown to be a hard thing to do for the Uchiha. He had concealed it up for years, wallowing in the Snake Sannin's lair, refusing to show weakness, refusing to let Orochimaru get the better of him.
And after a long term of hiding the emotions, it had become a bad habit. Just like when he concealed his chakra. She couldn't always tell when he was sneaking up on her. And speaking of bad habits, this was another. Groaning out her name as she did the same with his, and taking his frustration out with her in the form of a forbidden dance. Going to her everytime he needed someone. And not to talk, no he barely talked in general. Sakura liked to think of him as vocally challenged.
There'd be times when she'd awaken in the wee hours of the morning to find him standing quietly near her window, the wind, if there was any, flowing in easily through her wide open window and ruffling her already crazy hair. And she'd take him in with open arms, (and legs it seems) just happy that she is able to be this close to him. And when he'd leave while she was still awake, she angrily spout out the same sentence to the darkness, "I hate you."
And though she never meant it, and though she was oblivious to thinking he'd heard it, he had, every single time. And contrary to popular belief, he was sorry. But he would never admit it. He was sorry for all the times he'd made her cry, and all the times he'd made her worry. For all the stitches and band aids on her bruised heart. He was sorry that he left, he was sorry that he couldn't openly return her feelings. He was sorry that he'd taken things precious to her, and he was sorry for tainting her delicate body. But those feelings didn't keep him from wanting more. He always went back to her. Not because he had to, but because he wanted to. Because he needed to.
Often, he found himself thinking of when he took her the first time. It was a complete accident and he wanted to slap himself. 'Like she tripped and you fell?' He didn't remember everything, and he wished he did. He constantly regretted his decision to consume alcohol that night. But he'd wanted to lose himself. He wanted to drown his problems and forget it all. He'd had far too much sake and found his thoughts on those green emerald eyes that looked at him and darkened with lust. And usually love. And without another doubt, he'd gone straight to her house and knocked on the door, not giving a shit that it was two in the morning. Truth be told, he didn't care if he was waking her up. He wanted to be selfish. He wanted what he wanted, and he wouldn't be able to sleep without getting it. Too bad for Sakura, what he wanted that night was her.
And he'd gotten her alright. She hadn't known what to think when she'd opened the door. He looked stable but his eyes told otherwise, and his breath was contaminated with the smell of the harsh liquid. He'd stumbled in, and she'd caught him with sleepy arms. She didn't have time to ask any questions before the door was closed with his foot and his lips were on hers, snapping her wide awake. The next morning, the only time she'd ever awoken to his naked form, she'd let him believe that she'd been tipsy too.
Tipsy on him.
Life was a complicated thing. When he wasn't with her, it was even more so and it gave him headaches so terrible that he wanted to end his own existence. And all the headaches that he received, he got from thinking of her. He was bad for her, he knew. But she wanted him as much as he wanted her. And though he knew what he was doing was wrong, horrible and arrogant, he couldn't seem to control himself. Everytime he wanted her, he got her. And everytime he hated himself for putting her through it.
Tonight, another night of being drunk, and another night of her being high on him, and they danced the dance and she'd fallen asleep like she didn't mean to. As always, he was up with a pounding headache from the slight hangover that hadn't hit him full force yet. He was never angry at the pain. He was angry at himself. And he was convinced that he deserved much worse pain than this, for it was nothing compared to her pain. The tainted pretty little girl lying next to him under the sheet, exposed and vulnerable, to him and only him.
And when he'd stood and began to dress, she mumbled something that had struck him like a ton of bricks.
"...I forgive you, Sasuke-kun."
And he was truly shocked. Number one, he hadn't heard the suffix in a long time. He didn't even try to hide it, who was there to hide it from? Number two, how could she just forgive him? Even in her sleep, in her painful sleep she would forgive him. She would take him back and hold him, after everything he'd done to her, to her village. The pain he'd caused. He was a traitor. And in every single way, he accepted this. For he was even a traitor to himself as he felt himself giving in.
He was even there when the sunlight was streaming across his broad chest, and when Sakura opened her eyes. He was there when she burst into tears, and he was there to hold her, and he was there when she heard him swear to never hurt her again.
--
Hmm.
Yeah. I'm not even going to give my opinion on this because I'm just so lame. But guess who wants YOUR opinion? Me and my friend Mr. RB! See Mr. RB down there in the left hand corner, looking all purple and lonely? You should click on him and let him know what you thought. He needs company too ya know. ;) Wish me luck with chapter 23! If I can't get this thing done tonight, expect another candy for the road block! The next one might be SakuraxGaara. I've been itching to do one of those. Don't mistake this itch for one that leaves a scar. SasukexSakura is forever my favorite!