Chapter Eleven - Fear

What remained of the crew turned the ship around and headed back toward Montressor. They were very lucky; without the poison diversion that John and Kered planned, the rescue mission would not have been successful. Every traitorous crew member would have been killed and Serenity would have been raped and murdered. As it was, Marty had been slain; leaving the crew was without a medic. Most of the remaining crew was fine, having suffered clean cuts with cleaner blades. However, Serenity's cuts from the dirty ropes and sails were showing early signs of infection. As she continued to rest, fleeting in and out of deep sleep and delirium, John ordered the ship to make all haste back toward the Benbow Inn.

They arrived in a couple short days, but Serenity's injuries were only looking worse. The infections, though not yet lethal, needed to be treated quickly. When they docked, John helped Serenity walk to the inn while the crew tied things up on the deck. Sarah was busy cleaning some tables when they entered the lobby. She looked up and smiled at John. "Welcome back," she said warmly. "You're back much later than we…" She stopped when she saw Serenity, whose bruises had come to full fruition, with the infections visible. She could hold herself upright and walk, and was now fully coherent, but she still looked an absolute mess. "What happened?" Sarah asked, genuinely concerned.

Serenity smiled through the swelling. "I started a small fight." John mentally shook his head. Did she ever pass a chance to make a sarcastic comment? He looked at Sarah.

"I hope ye don't mind, but we need a medic as fast as ye can get one."

Sarah sprinted toward the kitchen, calling for her dad. As she did, Kered joined them inside the lobby. "Ship's secure," he said. He, too, was still recovering from some of his wounds, but his weren't terribly bad. He looked beat up, but that would change after his bruises healed. Sarah ran back inside, her father trailing shortly behind her.

"Ah, Mr. Pratchett," John said.

"Please, John, call me Jesse. I believe we have associated enough with each other to be on a casual basis." Jesse looked at Serenity. "Get into a bit of a scuff, have we?" He smiled in a fatherly manner.

"You really don't want to know," Serenity replied with a smirk.

"Well, I am sending Sarah to go get Dr. Doppler. He should be here within a couple hours."

John nodded. Then he looked at Kered and said, "Go with her an' let th' doc know what happened so that he brings everyt'ing he might need." Sarah and her father looked at Kered nervously. It was obvious that neither trusted the young girl to take the short trip alone with a brutish looking stranger. It was Serenity that spoke up.

"Don't worry about Sarah. Kered is a good man. He helped save my life a couple days ago; I trust him with Sarah's."

Jesse nodded and the two left. "My wife Melinda is upstairs in room four preparing a hot bath and some home remedies to slow the progress of your injuries until the doctor gets here. Go on upstairs, Serenity, and get yourself cleaned up and treated." She thanked him and did as he bid. When she disappeared at the top of the stairs, Jesse turned to Silver, a frown on his face. "I know it's none of my business, but what the hell happened?"

John sighed, feeling a headache coming on. "It's a fairly long story. Let me beg a glass 'o ale out o' ye and I'll tell it. Actually, ye may want to prepare a few glasses; the rest o' the crew will be comin' in shortly an' they'll be wanting some." Jesse disappeared into the kitchen and returned in a few moments with a tray full of ales. After John took a deep swig and felt his body begin to relax, he began his tale.

Eventually, the rest of the crew came to the inn. They helped themselves to the proffered ales and relaxed at a couple of other tables. There were only six crew members left, not including Max, who was sitting with Silver and Jesse. They had long since moved to a different, cheerier conversation by the time Serenity came back downstairs. She was joined by Melinda, who was a small framed woman with dark red hair and striking brown eyes. The room went quiet as they descended the stairs. Serenity had been cleaned up, sporting a new makeshift splint for her broken arm, and was wearing a dress. It was plain yellow and a little small for her, but looked quite lovely. She wore no shoes. Serenity held herself as though she felt awkward; none of them had ever seen her in a dress before. The two of them passed through the lobby to where John, Max and Jesse were seated. As they walked by, the crew members lifted their glasses to Serenity and took a hearty gulp. They were glad she was recovering.

John felt warmth circulating through his body that he'd never felt before as he looked at her. He felt almost giddy and didn't seem to noticed that he hadn't taken his eyes off her since she'd come back downstairs. The dress stopped just above her knees, hinting at a set of shapely legs sporting their own small bruises and cuts. Because the dress was just a little too small for her it fit snugly on her torso, accentuating her chest and the curves of her hips. Her hair, normally hanging loose around her face, was clean and pulled neatly back to keep it from sticking to the ointments on her bruises. Silver momentarily lost his ability to think straight. Max kicked him beneath the table to get his attention. "You're staring," he said, not bothering to keep his voice low.

Oh.

"Sorry," he muttered, taking a drink of his ale so he could hide his face in the glass. He felt the heat rising to his cheeks and thanked fate once again for his tanned skin that hid the worst of his blush.

Melinda placed a hand on her husband's shoulder. He took it with both of his own big hands and kissed it. "I've allowed John and their group to stay here free for a couple of nights, so they can rest. I hope you don't mind, my love."

"Not at all, dearest," she demurred with a smile. "What I do mind is that you have been sitting in here for so long and you've yet to get them something substantial to fill their stomachs."

"Right as always," he grinned. He kissed her hand one more time and stood to retreat to the kitchen. Melinda winked at the three of them and followed her husband.

Serenity pulled back a chair and sat with them at the table.

"How are you feeling?" Max asked her.

She nodded. "I'm feeling a little better. Cleaner, at least. These infections are starting to hurt, though. I'll feel better when the doctor gets here." They chatted for a while, though John was unusually quiet. When Melinda came out with the first few plates of food, Serenity started to stand up. John placed a hand on her shoulder to sit her back down, ignoring the butterflies that erupted in his stomach when he touched her. "Sit," he said. "I'll help her. No, don't argue with me. I know you're not useless; just sit and enjoy having someone else do the work for once." He held her eyes until she smiled and shook her head, defeated. John stood and helped Melinda serve food, while Max pulled another chair to the table so Jesse and his wife could both sit with them.

Max smiled at Ren in his mischievous manner. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were embarrassed to be in that dress."

"I may be in a skirt, in pain and injured, but I'm not afraid to grab that soapy mop in the corner and hit you again."

He laughed. "Well, relax. You look beautiful."

There was a long pause. Quietly, Serenity looked him in the eyes and whispered, "Thank you." She was not thanking him for the compliment, but for his part in helping her escape from Bennett with her life. Max nodded; he understood.

John and the Pratchetts sat back down at the table, after making sure everyone had food and plenty to drink. Serenity and Melinda both took glasses of water, preferring to stay away from alcohol. They enjoyed each other's company and relaxed until Kered and Sarah returned with the doctor. He was a humanoid canine, build in anatomy like a human with the physical features of a dog. He was tall and lean, with a largely protruding snout and a set of spectacles. His son, slightly older than Sarah and the striking image of his father, was also with them. While Sarah ran back to the kitchen to fill some plates for Kered and herself, the doctor and his son approached their table. Jesse stood to shake his hand. "Doctor," Jesse greeted him.

"Jesse," he returned. "Ah, and Miss Melinda." He bent down to place a respectful kiss on Melinda's cheek, and she returned the gesture. "I have no need to ask who it is that needs my attention," he stated with a slight smile, looking at Serenity. "I am Dr. Hubert Doppler, and this is my son Delpert. Seems you have taken quite a thumping, Miss…"

"Serenity," Ren said, extending a hand. "If you think I look bad, you should see the other guy. John, here, pounded his face in so hard not even his mother could have recognized him afterward." Silver felt the warmth inside of him again. She had said it with light humor, but it was true; and he knew that Serenity's comment was her way of thanking him for what he'd done.

"I'm sure I'd feel the same way if a man mishandled my own lady," Hubert admitted, shaking Serenity's offered hand. John had been taking a drink of his ale and choked on it. The rest of the crew stopped what they were doing to look curiously in their direction. Serenity only smiled and said, "We're just friends." Neither she nor John looked at each other. Max grinned into his cup, amused.

"My apologies; I assumed." A look in the doctor's eyes betrayed that he didn't believe her in the slightest. "Shall we? Those infections won't get any better while we sit and chat."

"Yes, of course." Serenity and Melinda stood and accompanied the doctor upstairs to Serenity's room. His son, dismissed, sat down where Sarah was enjoying her dinner; the two of them had obviously known each other for some time and were friends. The rest of the crew went back to what they had been doing, leaving John and Max at the table with Jesse.

"Why don't you say anything to her?" Jesse asked. It took Silver a moment to realize Jesse was talking to him.

"Is there somet'ing I'm supposed t' say t' her?" he asked, confused.

Jesse wagged a finger at him. "Don't you play dumb with me; I'm a married man and I know that look anywhere. You love her."

"Why do people keep saying that?"

"Because it's true."

Silver sighed. His question had been rhetorical. "She wouldn't see me as more than a friend, anyways," he muttered.

Max continued to smirk into his drink while Jesse shook his head. "If that's what you want to tell yourself," he said.

Eventually, they all went to bed. The doctor left shortly after tending to Serenity and some of the other men, and said that he would return in a couple days to see how she was healing. He advised her to keep from doing anything too physically straining and, if at all possible, to stay out of fights. She only smiled and bade him farewell, thanking him for his generosity.

The inn was small enough that everyone had to share a room, but they were so tired that no one cared. The only person with a room to herself was Serenity. John and Max slept in the room next to hers. Rather than share the bed with Max, John pulled a blanket and pillow and slept on the floor near the wall. The rooms were small and the walls were thin, so it wasn't a surprise when John woke in the middle of the night from the noise coming in the room next door. When he sat up and shook his head to clear the drowsiness, he listened. The room next door was Serenity's. Is she crying? Silver sat there for a moment, concerned. He wanted to go to her, but wasn't sure. He was slowly starting to accept his feelings for her, but knew she didn't share them. He knew the more he built up his hopes the harder they would burst. He also knew her pride and wasn't sure if she would appreciate him coming to her when she felt vulnerable.

Max shifted in the bed and, without looking at John or opening his eyes, said, "Go to her, if only so I can get back to sleep." Without further ado he began to snore again. John shook his head; but at least he now had an excuse. He stood up and walked out of the room, not bothering to put a shirt on.

Outside her door, he knocked lightly. When he was sure she hadn't heard him, he tested the knob and it was unlocked. So, he opened the door and poked his head in. "Serenity?" he called softly.

She stifled her tears and sat up, still sniffing. "John?" She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

"Ren, what's wrong?" He walked inside, closing the door behind him, and sat down next to her on the bed when she made room for him.

"Oh, John, I'm just so confused," she confessed. "I know Bennett is dead, but I'm still scared. I hurt, physically, and my mind feels worn. I feel like this is all a dream. I was so sure that I was going to die that I can't seem to get back into living. And then I think of all the crew members that died, some trying to save me and some trying to condemn me, and how you could have been one of those men, and I just feel so terrible for causing their deaths…" She crumpled into a fresh stream of tears, though these were quieter than earlier. "And then I started to think about things I haven't told you, yet. I want to, terribly, but I just can't because I don't want to hurt you any more than I have and…" She stopped trying to calm herself a bit. "Ugh, look at me, I've opened my mouth and blabbed on about things I shouldn't have."

"Serenity, look at me." She did. She had the most beautiful eyes, and even in the dark moonlight they glistened through the tears. It was all he could stand to not confess everything he felt to her and to take her into his arms. He reached toward the bedside table where her handkerchief lay and took the cloth. He put his other hand behind her head and dried her face and eyes gently with the fabric. They never took their eyes off of each other as he did it. His entire body burned with warmth. He could feel himself shaking with desire to hold her tightly, as though that would take away all her pain. He wanted nothing more than to see her happy and alive again. "Ye don't ever have t' tell me anyt'ing ye don't want to," he said, handing her the cloth. "I would never force ye t' tell me anyt'ing personal or t' do anyt'ing ye don't want t' do."

That started another welling of tears. "No, no," he said. He put both hands on either side of her face and gently used the pads of his thumbs to wipe off the newly forming moisture. "Please, don't cry," he begged. "I'm not used t' seeing ye this way an' it's breaking my heart."

"I'm sorry," she whispered, trying to fight off the tears. He continued to hold her head, caressing her face with his thumbs until she was calm. "I don't think I ever thanked you, John, for coming for me; for saving my life."

He shook his head. "You don't have to."

"Yes I do. I just…" She started a couple times as if to say something, but the words never came out. Finally she said, "Thank you, John."

I would gladly do it again, he wanted to say. I would risk it all again for you. But all he could work out was, "Don't mention it."

They sat in a comforting silence for a good while until Serenity was ready to try going to sleep again. "John," she started, when he stood up. He looked at her, ready to do anything she needed. "This is rather embarrassing to ask of you, but… it's just that I didn't get at all near falling asleep tonight. I was kept awake by my thoughts and my fears. I've felt so much better since you've come to comfort me. I just… would you mind terribly staying in here until I fell asleep? It's childish of me to ask, and you can say no, I know you need to sleep…"

"I'll stay in here as long as you need me to," he said.

"Thank you." She gave him one of the pillows and he made himself temporarily comfortable on the floor while she lay down on the bed and tried once more to sleep. His hands seemed to buzz where they had touched her face. He wondered what it was about her that she hadn't told him, and why such knowledge would hurt him. Certainly she had her reasons for keeping silent, but it was obviously important if it was enough to add to her tears. He wasn't going to press the matter, but his curiosity was hooked. He was laying there, wide awake and completely aware of her presence, for a half hour when he heard her start to sniffle again. He sat up to look at her.

"Ren?"

"Oh," she moaned to herself when she realized he had heard her. He put the pillow back on the bed and crawled under the covers next to her, gently maneuvering her until she faced him. He put an arm around her shoulder and she squirmed in tightly next to him, sniffling into his bare chest. The warmth inside him blazed into a fire and his body hummed with pleasure as she lay so close to him. Her body fit comfortably against his. A perfect fit, he thought happily, stroking her hair.

He had every intention of holding her until she was asleep and then retiring to his own room. Soon enough, her breathing slowed and she fell asleep. He knew he should go, but he was so comfortable that he couldn't make himself leave. Her head was tucked under his chin, her nose burrowed into the crook of his neck, and her good arm was pressed lightly against his torso. Content, he, too, fell into a deep slumber. When he woke in the morning the first thing he saw was Serenity, still snuggled against him. They hadn't moved all night.

Serenity was awake, but her eyes were closed. She was very conscious of John sleeping next to her. The last time she had shared a bed with him in this inn she had woken up to his face, inches from her own. He had been handsome then, even with tousled bed hair and morning breath. When she had woken up that last time she had been caught slightly off guard with him being so close. She remembers having reached up her hand to gently stroke his cheek, but had stopped before touching him, sighing to herself. She had known then, like now, that what she wanted could never be.

Currently, she continued to lie next to him, unwilling to move from what she knew wouldn't last much longer. She had been so distraught last night, pummeled with her fears and her sadness. She had only told him about part of what was bothering her last night. Everything she had told him, about Bennett and the pain and fear he caused her, and with the deaths of all those men, was terrible and it bothered her, but it hadn't been what had started the tears. She had started crying when she let her thoughts sink into her love for him, a torch she had been carrying for longer than Silver knew. She knew it could never be. She longed to be his everyday, but knew that allowing herself such pleasures would distract her from avenging her family's brutal murders. It wasn't that she didn't love him; she did. But her family was important to her and she knew that more innocent families would continue to be killed if Flint was allowed to continue living as he had been. She couldn't be swayed from her destiny. It was also very likely that she would die in her attempts to assassinate him. She didn't feel right leading Silver on, though she realized it was too late for that now. Not meeting his gaze last night while she had been wearing the dress Melinda lent her was Serenity's last, feeble attempt at ignoring the knowledge of John's growing feelings for her.

When he had come to her last night she hadn't realized she had been crying loud enough for him to hear. She had wanted more than anything to run to him in her time of need, but he had come for her, just like he did on Foul Wind. When he came and comforted her, her will power broke. His touch was so wonderful and she needed him so badly that she couldn't bring herself to push him away, even though she knew she was leading him on to something she couldn't fully offer him. She had let herself melt to his hands, which had so softly caressed her face and dried her tears. When she realized it was time to go to sleep, she hadn't wanted him to leave. She did need him there. It was as though his presence abated all her fears and worries. She had been so happy when he agreed to stay, but with him sleeping on the floor it was as though he wasn't there at all and she had eventually started crying again until he came and joined her in the bed. Nestled next to him, she had fallen asleep almost instantly, content in the present, but knowing the morning would bring with it regret.

And it did. She had led him on, and now she would have to break his heart. It was too late for subtleties. She didn't have the nerve to do it now that she knew for sure he held the same feelings she did. What a mess she had gotten herself into!

She felt him stir and knew he was going to be awake any moment. She knew this peaceful moment had to end some time, though she could have stayed there forever. As he woke he turned his head down so that his nose and mouth rested on her forehead and his hand reached up to cup the back of her head. She wondered, knowingly in vain, what it would be like to turn up her head and kiss him. She knew he had probably been with other women before, and that didn't bother her even though she had never had any romantic exchanges with any man. When did she have time, throughout all the masquerading as a boy on ships full of pirates?

She would have to open her eyes soon, but was afraid that if she looked at him she wouldn't be able to keep herself from him. He nuzzled her with his chin and the hand stroking her hair was moving enough that it would have woken her had she been asleep. It was now or never. She stirred as if waking. He moved his head back and as she opened her eyes and gazed at him, she knew she was about to lose further ground. His hand moved from her hair to caress her face as they looked at each other. She couldn't make herself stop him when he cupped her cheek and placed his lips on hers.

The kiss was electrifying. It was tender and gentle, but passionate. Serenity tried only for a fleeting moment to resist his warm lips, but knew all along she couldn't do it. She loved him too much. Abandoning all her reason, she reached her good hand up until her fingers ran through the hairs on the back of his head and she kissed him back. They did no more than kiss, but it lasted for several minutes and felt like an eternity of bliss. As they shared their experience, Serenity moved her arm, wrapping it around his neck, and he shifted his hand from her cheek, running it down her back until he could wrap his arm around her waist.

As their passion slowed, they removed their lips from each other and embraced. John kissed her neck and shoulder softly a couple of times, and Serenity cherished the moment, knowing that it would be the only time she could experience it. When she fully woke from this dream-state she would have to do the right thing. She knew she was being selfish, but she had wanted a moment like this since that night she first told John about what had happened to her family. That felt like so long ago, back on Crossblade when John still knew her as Ren the young boy.

It was now past dawn and Silver had to get ready for a day's work. He fully planned on doing what he could as thanks for the complimentary housing. They loosened their hug, and John kissed her again; a single, long kiss. Then he smiled happily at her and sat up. He stretched and made to move off the bed until Serenity sat up and held his arm. "Don't go," she whispered sadly, knowing that as soon as he left through that door her temporary euphoria would have to end and she would not be able to allow herself another moment like this with him again. John, of course, had no notion of her intentions.

"I have to," he whispered back. He pulled her arm up to his lips and kissed it. "My clothes are in th' other room, and I want t' make sure I earn my part o' this free housing. I don't want t' take advantage of th' Pratchetts' kindness."

"Of course not," she said quietly. She was slowly forcing herself to get a grip on her control. She had already set him up for enough hurt.

He ran the back of his fingers slowly down the side of her face, and when she diverted his gaze he lifted her chin until she looked at him again. "I don't want t' see ye sad, Serenity. I'm going t' be here with ye for a long while. If ye need anyt'ing all ye have t' do is ask me; I'll be here for ye." He smiled at her one more time. Then, he got up from the bed, still clad in only his shorts, and walked out. Serenity watched him go and after he shut the door she fell slowly back onto the bed. She curled into a ball and stared into nothing, focusing her thoughts on what she knew she had to do.

That day, Silver was unusually energetic as he worked in and outside of the Benbow. The crew spent their time during the day doing work for the Pratchetts to earn their room and board. Jesse and Melinda protested at first, but found that even a small group of sailors could be persistent. They inspected the entire Inn board by board, fixing leaks and loose wood. They also cut down a few of the trees from the small forest surrounding the inn and cut them into firewood. There was enough to last them the next couple winters. A few of them fixed some of the wobbly tables and chairs in the lobby, as well as re-secured the aging fence that ran along the tall cliff the inn was set on.

After he had woken up next to Serenity and saw her still lying next to him, he found that there was no way to precisely word what he was feeling. He had lain there for a moment, stroking her hair, trying to think of what he would say when she woke. He wasn't exactly used to this romantic business; he'd never even had a girlfriend before. It wasn't that he didn't like women, because he certainly did, but none of the ones he knew had ever been able to keep his interest, even the ones who hinted that they liked him. Serenity, however, was always surprising him, though she didn't always do so on purpose. Even after having known her for almost a year there was always an air of mystery surrounding her. Silver liked it. But he still didn't know how to speak to her, especially after a moment like this.

So, when she woke up and turned her head to look at him, he didn't say anything. What was there to say? His body seemed to move on its own and he felt surreal as he leaned in to kiss her. And, by thunder! What a kiss! He had never been happier than at that time, and the bliss was still lingering around him. His oddly chipper behavior brought weird looks from the rest of the men. If they had suspicions they kept them to their selves. Except for Max, of course.

Max came over where John was chopping firewood. He hadn't been in the room when John returned that morning. He greeted Max with a smile.

"I see," Max said automatically, with a knowing look in his eye. John didn't even bother trying to hide the bigger smile that followed. He simply went back to chopping wood and Max grabbed an axe to help him. A little while later, Serenity emerged from the inn. She was wearing another dress, this one a deep, plaid green. It seemed that Melinda was lending her clothes while she properly fixed Serenity's torn top and trousers. She was carrying a tray full of water which she carefully set down on a table outside. She hadn't seen him. John decided he was thirsty and took a short break, though he knew he really just wanted to be near to her.

"Hey, you," he said cheerfully. She turned, surprised, and blushed.

"Hey," she said quietly. She looked down at the glasses and tucked her hair behind her ear. There was an awkward silence as neither of them spoke.

John motioned to the waters. "May I?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said, stepping back so he could take one of the glasses. "I brought those out for Melinda. She was concerned you would all get dehydrated."

"Of course," he said. He sat on the table so he could face her. She didn't move, but she also didn't say anything. Her gaze kept flicking to and from him, and her blush remained. The men came over to get drinks and take a break of their own.

"How are you feeling, Miss Serenity?" one of the crew asked.

She smiled. "I'm doing alright. The medicines are taking off the edge of the pain, and my infections look healthier already."

"Swelling's gone down, too," Kered said. He placed a hand on her shoulder in acknowledgment, downed the contents of his drink, and went back to work.

"I'm going to go for a walk," she said abruptly. She cut through the group and walked briskly toward the forest, slowing when she got close. Silver frowned and stood to follow her, but was stopped by Max.

"Leave her be," he said. "That's the look of a woman who needs some time to herself. Seems she's got much on her mind." With that, he returned to chopping wood. John watched her until she disappeared into the trees before getting back to work.

She didn't emerge from the woods until several hours later. As it was, she wasn't allowed to do any work until her infections and arm completely healed, so she would do what little she could for Melinda and Jesse before going for a walk in the woods. It became a daily routine for her. The doctor came by every couple of days to check up on her, and she was healing quickly though the arm would take time. Soon enough her swellings disappeared and all but the worst bruises had completely faded.

John had never gotten the opportunity to be alone with her again since that first morning. Occasionally he would join her for her daily wanderings, but Serenity always invited someone else to come with them. She was quickly becoming her usual self again, but made no acknowledgment that anything had happened between them, and Silver was becoming confused. He tried to distract himself with other business: he found the rabbit-man he had stolen the longboat from and returned the boat in one piece with a generous handful of the Mooric pence and an explanation for taking the boat. The gentleman understood, once he had been informed, but left quickly afterward, glad to have his boat back. He also got the crew to start working on the ship, cleaning it up and changing some things, as well as sitting down with Max to discuss future operations. Serenity would join them sometimes, but she was typically absent for these conversations, spending a lot of time by herself. After a week or so, all but John, Serenity and Max had moved to living on the ship so that Jesse would have the rooms open for patrons.

John had the captain's cabin and the first-mate's quarters cleaned up. Everything of Bennett's, whether it had value or not, was removed from the ship and destroyed. Silver sawed away a section of the wall that separated the two cabins and put a door there, with a lock, so the rooms were accessible without having to go to the deck. The ship was theirs now, of course. Bennett was dead and Max had no wish to claim it, so John and Serenity made it theirs. One of the last things they did was sand away the painted name on the hull, replacing Foul Wind with Redemption.

Two months later, the ship was complete. Serenity's arm had healed enough that she no longer needed the sling. John offered jobs to the remaining men if they wished to stay, but most of them declined. It had been a long time since they had seen their families, and with the money split between them that Bennett left behind, they would not be in need for quite some time. So, they opted to work their way to their respective homes. The only ones who stayed were Kered and Max.

"I won't stay too long, though," Max told them. "Just enough to make sure you get the hang of the ship and find yourself a good crew. I have my own family to catch up with."

Serenity visibly jumped. "They let pedophiles have families?" They smiled at each other. "Sorry," she said, "but calling you that is never going to get old, no matter how untrue it is."

"My wife is quite the spirited woman. When I left her last to work with Bennett she was so angry that she hit me with a frying pan and told me never to come back. I suspect she's probably calmed down enough by now. I typically receive a most warm welcome from my travels." He winked.

One by one, the men caught rides with friendly strangers who were heading to the Spaceport. There, they would pay the fare to return to their homes. Each was a sad parting, and Serenity made sure to give each man a hug and thank him for what he had done to help save her life.

After the men had left, the four of them moved to the ship. John had the main cabin and Serenity was in Max's old quarters, while Max and Kered slept in hammocks under the deck. John was sitting in his room, considering some of the plans he and Max discussed about acquiring a crew, when he heard the outside door to Serenity's room open and close. Even with the rest of the men gone, Silver still hadn't gotten the opportunity to be with just her. It had been about two and a half months, and he was no longer sure that morning had even happened. Serenity didn't look at him often, and when she did she made no indication that she felt anything for him. He had slowly progressed from elation, to confusion, and into a simmering bitterness. Why was she ignoring him? He was frustrated because he had finally had her in his arms, returning his passion, and now there was nothing. What was bothering her? Looking out his window, he saw that it was late in the evening. Jesse and Melinda would be in bed already, so where was Ren going?

John put on his boots and quietly opened the door. He saw her walking down the gangplank onto the dock, toward the inn, and was surprised to see her sword at her hip. But when she reached the field she turned and headed toward the forest. He knew she went on day walks, but he was not so sure she indulged in night ones. He grabbed a jacket and followed her.

The forest was small, but old. The trees were tall and thick, and there was little debris on the ground because it was summer. He wandered quietly in the general direction he had seen her go. It wasn't hard to find her. He heard the sound of wood chipping and followed it. When he knew he was close he picked a nearby tree to climb and hoisted himself into the leafy branches. There was a sturdy branch that extended into the small clearing she was in. It provided a lot of cover and she probably wouldn't see him if she bothered to look up. He crawled quietly along the branch until he could see her, and watched.

She had her sword out and was hacking at the tree in front of her. At first it was a timely pattern dance, but as she continued it quickened, becoming more passionate. Chips of wood went flying to the ground as she swung her blade, gracefully switching it back and forth between her right and left hands. She moved the steel easily no matter which hand she used. Did I know she was ambidextrous? John asked himself. He continued to watch, fascinated. Her organized pattern dance quickly fell into an emotional chaos. Before his eyes she devolved from an expert swordswoman to an emotional wreck, and was soon hitting the tree just to hit it. She was sweating profusely and he could see she was tiring quickly. She was also holding her left arm awkwardly, because it had not quite fully healed and she was over straining it.

With an anguished cry, she turned around and threw her sword into the forest where it landed close to the base of John's tree. She stood for a moment, heaving, and then began to cry. As her tears built up she collapsed to the ground where she bowed her head to her knees and sobbed. She cried for what felt like an hour. He couldn't quite hear her, but knew she was talking out loud as she cried, the words mostly muffled by her pants, which had long since been fixed. He picked up a few words, such as "Why?" and "I can't." After a while she calmed, but she didn't move. She sat, staring at the stars for an endless amount of time.

He wasn't sure how long they had been out there when she finally stood. Wordlessly, she walked to where her sword lay and picked it up, sheathing it. She looked blankly at the tree in front of her and after a moment took out one of her daggers and carefully carved something into the trunk. Satisfied, she put the knife away and walked back through the forest and to the ship.

When Silver was sure she had gone, he climbed down the tree and walked to the small clearing. He looked at the tree she had used for target practice: it was thoroughly cut up, with a large dent in it from so much missing wood. He suspected this wasn't the first time she had practiced here. Then he walked to the other tree to see what she had left on it. It was hard to read in the darkness, but the light cast from the Spaceport was enough to illuminate the message: "I'm sorry." He placed his hand on the carving and frowned.

((AUTHOR'S NOTE: So there I was, sitting in my living room and studying for a midterm, when I had the random urge to work on my fic again. I have a few friends that have been bugging me about it recently, so I thought it was a good time to start writing. Granted, I neglected studying for my midterm until the day of and probably failed the test, but I should be alright. It was very interesting for me to write this chapter. My head was pounding after a while because I'm not really much for romance novels or movies, and here I am writing what turned out to be an entirely romantic chapter. Surprisingly enough, this wasn't exactly what I had planned. So far I have about 22 chapters outlined for this book, and the content in each chapter. The chapter numbers wax and wane as I write; this is because, as I'm writing, I sometimes discover that the content I have listed for each chapter either turned out to be too long or too short, so I adjust accordingly. This particular chapter was one of those times. I had much more planned for this chapter, but the content itself changed from what I had originally planned. In this section, Silver was only going to comfort Serenity a little bit and that was going to be all. In fact, there wasn't supposed to be any mutual romantic development until chapter 17. But as I kept writing everything fell into place. I could visualize it all in my mind and, though it wasn't what I originally planned, I knew it was where it had to be. My reasons for this are not for you to learn yet… but perhaps I will remember to tell you why at the end, if you don't figure it out for yourself. It didn't change anything major in my story, but now I need to go to my outline and adjust a few things. In the meantime, I hope this is sufficient for you as far as a romantic moment. I implored my boyfriend to give me some inspiration for the kiss. ;) Anyway, I'm not sure when I will have time to start the next chapter. The end of my semester is coming up and I have about 4 research papers I need to write. Hopefully I'll have some time this summer, but I don't know that I will. I will do my best to keep you all posted. John Silver/Treasure Planet © Disney, Serenity © myself.))