title: one apocalypse shy of a way out
author: m
rating: pg13
word count: 1261
prompt: #026 - teammates
disclaimer: don't own the DC universe as evidenced by the fact it's the DC Universe
pairing: Batman/Superman, Supergirl/Nightwing
summary: they think no one knows...SERIOUSLY.
author's note: okay, this is what pops into my brain at 2 a.m. and demands to be written.

They think no one knows. It would be funny if it weren't so painfully hysterical.

-

Supergirl's hand closes around Nightwing's ankle, bringing his death plunge to a rather sudden halt. "Hey handsome," she grins down at him as they hover over the Atlantic. "Going my way?"

"As long as there's no subzero water involved I am." She lets him brace himself against her to flip himself upright, wrapping an arm around her waist in the process. "Promise not to dunk me?"

She holds him close to her side, beginning the flight back to land. "Depends – what's in it for me if I do?"

Nightwing mulls it over before offering, "Dinner that doesn't involve extra value meals and a movie with lots and lots of subtitles which you don't actually need?"

She rolls her eyes. "Make it pizza and a Hitchcock retrospective on your couch and you've got a deal."

"You're a cheap date, Kent," he teases affectionately.

"A fact most guys wouldn't complain about," says Supergirl, laughing. "Especially when you consider the company," she looks arch, "most guys would kill for a shot at me."

"And some of them literally do," he points out with a grin. "Hazard of the job."

She briefly considers dropping him but Batman gets all sorts of twitchy when Nightwing or Robin gets manhandled (okay, girlhandled) and if he gets twitchy, Superman gets none and she's not sitting through another West Wing marathon with him muttering over the Josh/Sam subtext. Just no. She likes comfort tv just fine but, there's comfort and then there's Clark's idea of comfort tv. This? Does not bode well.

The plane from which Nightwing took his little aerial escape explodes behind them and she spins to look, to which she hears a muffled grunt of surprise from the man in her arms. A little too fast on that one then, have to remember that one for the next time..

"We should probably go back and check…" Nightwing muses while she listens and hears familiar voices bickering in the distance. Oh dammit, she's going to need to stock up on popcorn and soda – there's so a marathon in her future.

"Oh you don't want to, trust me," she grimaces at him.

"You're kidding! They're not…Oh who am I trying to fool," he grouses. "Of course they're fighting. It's all they do."

Supergirl starts toward the mainland again. "Well, here's hoping this is one of those fights you start just so you can have really great makeup sex."

He groans. "Oh, I did not just hear that, okay? Seriously, Kara, I'm going to need bleach after that!"

She rolls her eyes. "Drama queen."

-

Clark's grousing about Sorkin, bad writing, and deserters when she flees into the kitchen under the excuse of needing more soda. A soda, she wishes, was liberally laced with rum or the Kryptonian equivalent since technically, yeah; she can't get drunk on the human stuff. Right now? Kara wants to be very, very, very drunk. She's supposed to be the college student with the crazy lovelife right?

So, how exactly is it that she's the one playing dear abby to her cousin who's in a relationship she's not even supposed to know about?

She sneaks out the window in the bathroom, flying up over the city to tap her earpiece. "J'onn? Please tell me there's some sort of alien invasion imminent?"

The Martian sounds confused (she knows better, the jerk's laughing at her and the rest of the League is probably leaning over his shoulder doing the same damn thing) when he answers, "All sectors report back clear unless there is something you know which we don't?"

She sighs. "There's never a good apocalypse around when you need one."

-

Bruce Wayne's office at Wayne Tower is the very height of fashionable tastes but she can see hints of the Batman if she looks hard enough. Today she's not really looking. Instead, she hovers outside his office and waits.

The door barely closes behind Lucius before she's in the room and glaring at him.

Bruce leans back in his chair, completely nonplussed at having Superman's quite furious cousin standing over him. "Is there something wrong, Supergirl?"

Okay, so it's still jarring as hell to hear Batman's voice coming out of Bruce Wayne's face. "You know, it's damn annoying when you do that," she complains before poking him in the chest. "What the hell is up with you and Clark?"

He frowns at her usage of Superman's real name and she holds back a snicker. Psychiatrists would have a field day with Bruce's compartmentalization abilities. "I don't have to explain our working relationship to a child."

She smirks, he sounds almost defensive but then again, Clark is pretty much one of his biggest sore spots and she's not touching the pun on that one. "Oh good, because I'm neither a child nor interested in your working relationship." And yes, at some point in the near future she will have a massive panic attack at lecturing the Batman but that point's not now. She's on her third night of West Wing, they just started season two and oh god, there's way too many seasons left. "Hate to tell you but, really? Who do you two think you're trying to fool? God knows it's not the League or, at least, me, Dick and J'onn…hell, Diana's clueless but she's not that bad that she'd miss you two."

Kara knows she's talking rapid fire but she's running out of nerve and he looks like he's about ready to try and put her through a wall. This is Batman; he probably has Kryptonite saved up for occasions just such as this when crazy Kryptonians show up to holler at him. Okay, maybe not like this but who's kidding? She is so in over her head and damn, the things she does for family.

Clark better damn well appreciate it when she's gone.

"Look, whatever the problem is? Just fix it. Take him out to dinner, fly up to the Fortress and pound him through a mattress, WHATEVER! Just get him off my couch and back to being the optimistic boyscout we all know and love." She pokes him again, makes him stumble just a little. "You're dating my cousin okay? Only family I've got left in the universe," Yeah, so she's not counting Uncle Jonathan and Aunt Martha but a little dramatic license never hurt anybody, "and you hurt him? I hurt you and that, I should point out, would be hell on my love life so I really don't wanna do it – okay?"

A muscle in Bruce's jaw twitches, she thinks it just might be the beginnings of a grin but she doesn't want to get ahead of herself here. Instead, she steps back and wonders if it's too late to write a will.

He considers her for one protracted moment before asking, "He's really on your couch?"

"Him, Ben, Jerry and Aaron Sorkin," she affirms with a pained look.

Bruce looks faintly amused; she thinks maybe yelling hallelujah and thanking Jesus would not be overkill here. "Marathon?"

She nods. "Season two starts tonight."

He winces. "Ouch."

"Just fix it," she pleads before disappearing out the window, glad to be out of there with her life.

-

A car accident, a near plane crash, and a run in with Livewire later she's back in her apartment.

Clark's gone but there's a note on her fridge.

"We need to talk…and thanks."

She rolls her eyes and crumples it. "They really thought nobody knew?"