THE QUESTION...
Ratchet stared at the human incredulously, running a quick scan over his audios to make sure they were functioning correctly. According to the results flashing across the inside of his optical display, they were 100 operational and working fine. That still didn't convince him that he had heard the human right. Beside him, Wheeljack, who had been dragged into this whole fiasco, had covered his faceplate in a waning attempt to smother a snort. The twins hadn't even attempted to hide their amusement. Sideswipe was leaning against his sunshine brother, cackling madly at the medics face. Sunstreaker, although silent, had a smirk on his face that said he was very glad it wasn't him.
He paused as his processor finally acknowledged the question and thought, not for the first time, that Prowl owed him big.
The human sitting on the steps at the back of the assembled class tilted her head, arm still ramrod straight in the air, and gave him a big smile. "So, you do know where Transformer babies come from, right? I mean, you are the doctor, right?"
Sideswipe popped up beside Ratchet, tossing his arm casually around the medics shoulder and patted his chest. "Yes he is!" He offered perkily, "Go on Ratchet, tell us where Transformer babies come from."
The white and red grimaced and glanced at Wheeljack, who was standing beside Sunstreaker, ear fins flashing brightly with his barley contained laughter. Well, no help coming from that direction.
"Well, Dr. Ratchet?" The girl asked impatiently, dropping her arm and shrugging, "If you don't know, just say so."
"Of course I know!" Ratchet spluttered, close to stomping his foot, "But I don't see why you need to know!"
The girl leaned back, a frown crossing her freckled face. "Well, you know where human babies come from, right? So why shouldn't we know how you guys have babies? It can't be that embarrassing..."
Wheeljack snickered, and the girl turned her sight to him. "You're the engineer, aren't you? Doesn't that make you, like, the nurse?"
She had pushed Sideswipe to his limit. He burst into laughter, hanging onto Ratchet, who looked rather amused at the thought of his friend being a nurse.
"So, do you know?" The girl pressed Wheeljack, who looked as though he wanted to be anywhere else in the world at the moment.
"Well, uh," Wheeljack scratched the back of his head. "Transformers don't actually have babies," he began with a shrug. "It's pretty complicated." The class looked up at him expectantly, teacher included, and he began again. "Well, when a mech and a femme love each other very much, their sparks combine, and form a third spark."
A nerdy-looking boy on one of the front steps threw his hand into the air. "But your spark is what keeps you alive; how can you combine two of them?"
Wheeljack glanced at Ratchet, who merely shrugged. "We just...can." He decided. "Anyway, after that, the spark is put in a containment chamber, and a medic or engineer builds a body for the new transformer."
"That's not fair! How can you exist without your spark?" The nerd demanded. A large burly boy sitting behind him smacked the back of his head.
"Because they can, dork! Didn't you hear him."
A new hand shot into the air, this one belonging to a barely-clothed blonde bombshell sitting in the middle of a gaggle of boys.
"So how do you know when you're in love?" She asked, looking straight at Sunstreaker.
Sideswipe drew the attention to himself. "Well, first your sparkāer, heart starts to beat really fast, and your palms get real sweaty," He said seriously, gazing at the girl, "and then you look at that special someone, and your eyes meet, and there's nobody else in the world at that moment, and you know you're in love!"
Sunstreaker gave his twin a blank look. "Where the hell did you read that?"
The red brother, looking decidedly pleased with himself, said "I read it on the back of a cereal box."
Ratchet resisted the urge to smack the mech, and instead swept his gaze over the class. "Any more questions? No? We'll be on our way then..."
"Wait!" Several more hands rose.
"How fast can you go?"
"Does it hurt to transform?"
"What does energon taste like?"
"Can we watch you battle the Decepticons?"
"How old are you?"
"Do you like Earth?"
"What's Cybertron like?"
Briiiiiiiiiing!
The inquiring students groaned as the bell signaling the end of fifth period rang; Ratchet almost heaved a sigh of relief. He watched the humans gather up their bags and run up the steps into the building, heading for their next class, the teacher herding them away from the parking lot. Wheeljack grinned and stretched.
"Glad that its over?" He asked the medic.
Ratchet gave the Lancia a flat look. "Extremely."
"Um, Mr. Ratchet?"
The medic looked down and spotted the girl that had started the entire question-fiasco standing at his feet, looking up at him with large, admiring eyes. "Uh, thanks for coming. That was a really neat lesson." She flashed him a large smile.
"Er, you're welcome?" Ratchet offered.
Her smile widened as the second bell rang. She gave them an apologetic shrug before turning and sprinting up the stairs and into the building.
"Ratchet and redhead sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" Sideswipe sang, darting out of Ratchets reach. Sunstreaker followed him into the parking lot, where they both transformed with barley a thought.
"You two coming?" Sunstreaker demanded as they tore out of the lot and onto the highway. Wheeljack clapped his hand on Ratchets shoulder with a chuckle.
"Shall we?" He asked, and Ratchet snorted before transforming.
"Nothing would make me happier. I've got a circuit to pick with Prowl..."
End
Thanks for reading! My first G1 story! Please review!