Disclaimer: Think I could buy the copyrights with ten billion euro? I'm still collecting the money thoug, so I quess I can't say its mine. Yet.

They stared at him, trying to remember to breathe once in a while, sweat dripping from their foreheads. Every move Naruto made, they would see. Every word the boy said, they'd hear it.

Naruto leaned backwards a bit. They leaned in, closer. They didn't want to miss anything, the excitement was too much. The boy would finally say who he chose! One of them, it had to be.

Sasuke was smug and confident.

Sakura was pretty sure and hopeful.

Sai was resisting the urge to jump the boy.

And Naruto wondered if this really was a good idea. Of course it was, he kept telling himself. They deserve to know that he had picked someone and then they could move on with their lives and be happy. Just like Naruto was happy with whom he had chosen.

Crossing his arms in front of his chest, Naruto nodded to himself and smiled.

"It's someone who has been there with me from the very beginning."

Sasuke looked even smugger, giving his rivals a victorious smirk.

"Someone who may seem murderously violent but is actually quite sweet and caring."

Sakura smiled despite how Naruto had voiced her bad side. It was her temper, but what could one do? Besides, Naruto always cherished the good qualities of a person over the bad ones. Sasuke's smug smirk was fading a bit.

"And last but not least, someone who's not familiar with feelings but is willing to learn and adapt to them for me."

Sai smiled, the other two didn't. What was Naruto talking about? Had he found some kind of a Sasuke-Sakura-Sai hybrid, willing to fulfil all of Naruto's wishes and ditch the real things?

Naruto ignored their looks, instead focusing his gaze on his stomach, pulling the shirt up a bit, revealing his marked tummy.

"Isn't that right, Kyuubi?"

Sasuke had already used the few reactions he had in store.

Sakura didn't even know how to react to something like that.

Sai wasn't smiling anymore.

"Dobe."

"Naruto… you do realise you just said you're having a relationship with a gigantic fox demon sealed inside your belly?"

Naruto momentarily stopped patting his stomach, looking the three of them like they were stupid. Which they were, in his opinion. Kyuubi was the perfect choice after all.

"Of course I realise that, Sakura-chan. Can't you just be happy for us?"

And the three of them were looking at him like he was stupid. Which he was, at least after talking all that nonsense.

"So do tell us, dobe. How are you planning on having a relationship with someone who is sealed in you stomach?"

It seemed to be the question Naruto had been waiting for. He looked confident and proud of himself and laughed quite creepily which more than unnerved his suitors.

"Poor Sasuke, you know so little."

Sasuke twitched slightly.

"Behold!"

Naruto did some hand seals, soon a shadow clone standing there beside him. Only, this one had red eyes with slitted pupils. The clone looked around it, then at Naruto, then its hands. Looking like he couldn't believe it was there.

The clone grinned manically.

"You set me free, you fool!"

Kyuubi seemed extremely excited, probably plotting the next little mischief it'd perform. Maybe go over to Suna and destroy the city to bits.

Naruto just shook his head and took a kunai out from a horribly suspicious place. Stabbing it into Kyuubi's shoulder, the possessed shadow clone disappeared.

"Stupid, it's just the body of a shadow clone. So easy to destroy you, Kyuubi-baby."

The boy nothing but muttered to himself, making his ex-teammates hesitant on being so close to the boy. Naruto had lost it, most likely, probably, without a doubt, literally. And now he was summoning another clone looking like himself except the red eyes.

Although the sight of two Naruto's so close to each other was kind of arousing to the three still watching, they would prefer not knowing anything else of the twisted relationship the boy had gotten himself into. Maybe one day he'd come to his senses and then they'd have another chance.

Maybe.

"But at least that temporary body can withstand a bit of… fun."

Kyuubi growled as Naruto winked at it. The real Naruto was lifted from the ground and thrown over a tan shoulder.

"Please be gentle with me, Kyuubi-sama."

"I'll fucking destroy you, kit. That's real pleasure."

And the two blonds were gone from their sight, thankfully. It was too bizarre for them to take anymore. Maybe the day the boy came to his senses was still long away. Too far away for their liking. Better let the unpredictable boy go.

Yeah, it was definitely better to leave their precious Naruto in the clutches of a sadistic, violent belly demon.

Where was the logic in that?

Shrugging, they bid farewell to each other and went home.

-END 3-

I love Kyuubi! And Itachi. But that had nothing to do with this.

Anyway! Next I'll try and write Sakura. Yesh. And then Hinata and then Neji. Though I shouldn't promise anything because keeping promises is so hard.

Oh well. This chapter was kind of random. Out of the blue if I may. But you can show Kyuubi some love anyway by reviewing:D