Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing, so no suing, or yelling or any such other thing. I really don't have the time for it and will yell right back at you.
AN: Hello everyone I'm back with ANOTHER oneshot…I no there just flying out of me at the moment ne? Well who cares since we all love them. Well anyways I hope you enjoy this oneshot, please R&R I'd be ever so grateful. Oh and I want to give a huge thanks to Naru-Kyou for giving me the picture that inspired this fic and also this oneshot it dedicated to FFirst2L for being the main reason behind me thinking of this idea. So thankyou very much you two. You both rock!! Well toodles and enjoy!!!
Hugs and Kisses
BlackEyedWicca
Get Your Mind Out Of The Gutter
Sasuke was having another one of those days. You know the ones where you have nothing to do because you've done everything worth doing. So he was now currently walking through Konoha actually hoping to find a horde of fangirls to chase him. It would give him something to do even if only for a few minutes. He had been walking around unsuccessfully for a little over an hour when he noticed his favorite little blonde dart into an alleyway.
Curious as to what Naruto could want to do in such a disgustingly dirty alley he followed the blonde at a distance. When he reached the alley he jumped up onto a balcony and hid in the shadows, making sure to stay out of the fidgeting blonde's view. As he sat watching the blonde he couldn't help letting his eyes run over him. He had long come to terms with his attraction for his team mate, accepting the fact that he loved him had taken a little while longer.
He was stopped from his examination as the blonde started pacing. He saw Naruto's mouth moving but couldn't hear the words. Carefully, with the grace and skill that only came with training he climbed from the balcony onto the floor, hiding behind a set of garbage cans. Lifting his head enough to see the blonde but stay cloaked in shadows to those who weren't looking for him. Quietly he waited for him to start mumbling again.
"Stupid lousy asshole….making me come to an alley…..rather be at the privacy of my home….stupid dickhead and his weird sense of humor…..he's the one who set up this meeting, today of all days….errgh…. stupid lying dumbass…" Naruto stopped his talking and movement suddenly before turning his head to the left looking at the opposite direction of where he had entered from.
Following his gaze Sasuke waited for something to happen. After a few moments the faint outline of someone appeared. "Uzumaki." They said in a blank voice. Sasuke blinked, it sounded familiar but he couldn't quite place who it was. "No one followed you, correct?" Naruto crossed his arms in a huff. "I'm not that stupid of a ninja." A disbelieving noise was heard from the other figure. "Are you sure?" He saw Naruto tense from the corner of his eye and focused back on him.
"Why don't you check yourself if your so paranoid?" Sasuke froze and subconsciously held his breath, waiting for there answer. "Fine" Eyes widening slightly Sasuke quickly ducked behind the trash cans, careful not to make a noise as he laid on his back, thankful there were newspapers covering the ground. He stayed waiting quietly behind the trash cans. Hands poised ready to do a jutsu if found. After a few tense moments he heard Naruto speak up. "Are you done yet? I actually want to leave this alley some time in the next century."
Sasuke's eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. He was getting frustrated by all the changes the blonde was showing lately. Naruto was meeting someone in a dark alley, was smiling more if that was even possible and he had been forming good comebacks. It was confusing the raven. A few seconds later however his mental questions were answered as the other person spoke. "Don't use the comebacks I give you on me Naruto."
He could practically hear the pout in Naruto's voice. "But, but Sh." He was cut off by the others angry hiss. "I've told you don't say my name when we meet! These are suppose to be secret meetings. Do you know what would happen if my boyfriend found out?" Sasuke froze and went to sit up but at the last moment stopped himself not wanting to be seen. "Yeah, yeah I know. We'd both be dead."
A surge of protectiveness flew through Sauske and before he could stop it his Sharingan was activated. He would not let anyone harm his Naruto. As soon as the thought flashed through his mind he heard the stranger speak. "Come on let's do this. We can't be found together remember." His Sharingan faded to be replaced by hurt. Could this person be Naruto's…..lover?
He shook the thought off. Naruto wasn't gay. He had convinced himself of it, in fact it was one of the reasons why he had left Konoha in the first place. With the blonde's constant and loud love for Sakura he had known his only hope was a friendship with the blonde…and that was something he couldn't be satisfied with. Naruto however, the persistent loudmouth had chased him down and forced him back….and Naruto, he could never refuse.
"Okay, okay fine I'll do it…but you know I hate doing this in an alley." The other guy laughed. "What you'd prefer it to be public?" He heard a small squeak and figured it was Naruto. "No!! You perverted asshole." He heard a small growl in response before a muttered "Just do it already, my time and patience is running low."
"Fine! Now lets see. What one are we up to? Oh yeah that's right." Naruto paused before putting on a sultry voice, hearing footsteps he figured Naruto had started walking towards the other guy. "You put the long hard shaft into your hot waiting mouth." Sasuke's eyes widened to dinner plate size proportions, his body frozen in shock. "You play with it around your tongue, in and out, in and out." Sasuke clenched his shirt as his Sharingan once again activated in his fury.
He heard a small chuckle from the other guy and started to shake. "You feel it building up inside you, you go faster and faster." He heard the footsteps stop and then Naruto continued. "Until the white creamy liquid fills your mouth, you spit and it's all over." He heard a small gasp and couldn't take it anymore he flew up from his hiding place Sharingan spinning widely. "What the fuck are you doing Naruto!!!"
Naruto's eyes snapped to his, wide with shock. "S-Sasuke?" He asked stunned but Sasuke was to lost in the middle of being angry, shocked and heartbroken. He knew it would hurt to lose Naruto to a girl…but to a guy? It was plan unbearable. Refusing to look at the guy who had stolen his love he glared at Naruto instead. "So is this your boyfriend then? Some guy who's already taken?"
"Sasuke…" Naruto started but was cut off by Sasuke who wouldn't listen. "What happened to you loving Sakura? Or did you suddenly just jump to guys? Don't even fucking give any other guy knowledge or chance to try." Naruto's shocked eyes turned to confusion before realization. "You….you" But before he could get out a sentence Sasuke had turned to the other guy, who during the conversation had shrunk back into the shadows so he couldn't be seen.
"And you, you useless piece of crap. You fucking date someone else while playing with him on the side. You worthless piece of shit. I ought to kill you were you stand!" By this point his Sharingan was wild and chakra waves were practically rolling off him in his fury. He snarled and went to take a step forward when he felt a hand grab his arm. Turning he snarled a glare in place as he pushed the person who had touched him up against the wall.
He was about to move away when his mind registered just who it was and how close he was to them. Eyes fading back to obsidian he looked into Naruto's worried eyes and instantly felt guilty. Letting Naruto go he took a few steps back, focusing on the ground. "I…uhh" Cursing himself mentally at both letting his anger take control and his failure at speaking he mentally took a deep breath before looking up at Naruto.
He was surprised to find the blonde glaring at him. "What the hell is wrong with you Sasuke-Teme." Sasuke blinked but otherwise didn't move. Frustrated Naruto threw his hands up in the air "What is with you! You jump out from behind a bunch of garbage cans and practically proclaim your love for me and start accusing me of all this stuff and I have no idea why!!" Turning he gave the shocked raven an exasperated look.
However before Sasuke could reply the other person spoke up. "You baka. He heard you telling m...what you did, not to mention in a sexual voice…add how the rest of the conversation sounded. Of course he's going to jump to conclusions." Naruto blinked. "But all I said was….oh." You could almost see the penny drop. When it did he instantly turned angry. "Teme!! Get your mind out of the gutter!! You're as bad as the frog hermit and Kakashi-Sensei put together."
Sasuke bristled at the insult. "Well how the fuck was I suppose to take it?!?" Before Naruto could reply the other spoke up. "If you had waited a little more Uchiha you would have heard the last line." Spinning around Sasuke was just in time to catch a notebook. "I was given this just before Naruto spoke the last line. Read the joke." Almost warily the raven looked down at the notepad.
You put the long hard shaft into your hot waiting mouth
You play with it around your tongue, in and out, in and out
You feel it building up inside you, you go faster and faster
Until the white creamy liquid fills your mouth, you spit and it's all over
Take care of your teeth.
It was at the last line that he felt the full impact of the situation hit him. Naruto now knew he loved him all because he had miss interpreted a dirty joke. "We have an arrangement Naruto and I." Looking up he was surprised to see just who stepped out of the shadows. "He tells me perverted jokes he learns from Kakashi and Jiraiya for me to tell my boyfriend and in exchange I tell him quotes and comebacks to use against you. Neither one of us wants anyone to know so we meet in secret. That was until you decided to follow him."
Sasuke stood stone still. It was Shikamaru Nara….this was nothing more then an exchange of words. It was nothing he ever had to worry about….and now he had blown it….Naruto would hate him and he had nothing to show for it. Not even a kiss. Slowly regaining what was left of his composure. He gave a brief nod. "Keep your charade up. I don't care. I have better things to do then tell people of your escapades." Turning around he headed for the exit of the alley, avoiding Naruto's eyes.
He had only taken a few steps when he felt a hand grab him. Turning around slowly he looked into sky blue eyes and mentally grimaced. "Naruto." He started but was cut off when the blonde himself spoke. "So…you love me?" Sasuke didn't answer, simply kept his blank face in place. He briefly heard Shikamaru walk away but was brought back to Naruto when he pouted. "Come on Sasuke-Teme. You basically said it. Now tell me, do you love me?"
When he still didn't answer Naruto went to speak again but was stopped when he was grabbed and thrown against the alley way. Before he could yell a complaint he was captivated by the angry look in Sasuke's eyes. "Do I love you? Of course I fucking love you. Why do I keep saving you, helping you, tolerating you? Why do you think I let you bring me back? It's because I love you and no matter how much I try I can't fucking stop."
Before Naruto could fully process Sasuke's words and respond he had lips crashing into his in a desperate kiss. He gasped in surprise and in that instant Sasuke's tongue was in his mouth tasting him, feeling him, memorizing him. He wanted to push Sasuke off so he could get some air but the way he was clinging to him made him stop. Sasuke was holding and kissing him helplessly and he realized that to Sasuke this was the only kiss he'd ever get and he was trying to never let it end.
Just when Naruto had finally reached a decision about what he would do regarding both Sasuke and the kiss the raven was pulling away from him. Opening his eyes, which he never remembered closing he looked into Sasuke's depressed ones as he stood there panting. Naruto new suddenly that he never wanted to see that look in Sasuke's eyes ever again. Not letting himself rethink it Naruto had caught Sasuke's lips in another kiss.
Sasuke's eyes widened as he felt lips connect with his. He instantly responded pressing his lips against Naruto's. He felt a hesitant tongue swipe against his lips. For a moment he wanted to push away and ask what Naruto was doing, but it soon disappeared as he opened his mouth, reasoning that even if it was a pity kiss or an experiment on Naruto's part he still got another kissed with his loved one out of it.
As there tongues dueled he hesitantly raised his hand to tangle in Naruto's hair, when he felt no resistance he loosely slung his arm around Naruto's shoulder drawing him closer. In response he felt arms wrap around his waist, he almost smiled into the kiss but refrained, simply kissing Naruto with more vigor.
When they finally broke apart for air Sasuke found himself holding Naruto tighter not wanting to let the fox boy go. A small laugh came from Naruto drawing the Uchiha's attention. "Hey…if I had of kissed you back you know during the academy kiss…would you have kissed me back?" Sasuke blinked, surprised at the question. Answering truthfully he said "I don't know." Naruto nodded. "Oh….well at least you're going to be kissing me now."
Sasuke tensed slightly "W-What?" He asked mentally cursing his stutter. Pulling back Naruto gave him a curious look. "What? You love me but you don't want to be my boyfriend?" He pouted and went to pull away but Sauske stopped him, pulling him back and locking eyes with him, Naruto instantly stopped his struggles. "You…want to be my boyfriend?"
Naruto rolled his eyes a humorous smile on his face. "And you call me the dobe." A smirk soon formed on Sasuke's face, his usually attitude close behind. "Tch, I'm not the one who needs to trade jokes for comeback lines." Naruto frowned. "Teme!" Sasuke's smirk widened as he leaned down and lightly nipped his kitsune's ear causing the blonde to shiver. Moving his mouth up he whispered huskily into it. "Want to try out your joke…for real?"
Pulling his head back Naruto looked into Sasuke's face, confusion plain in his sky blue eyes. "Why? Does my breath stink or something? You weren't complaining when we made out." Sasuke chuckled slightly before giving a predatory grin. "Dobe, you're thinking of it the wrong way." It took a few seconds for it to click, but when it did Naruto's face turned beet red. Sadly for Naruto that only made Sasuke's smirk widen and with a few hand symbols they were at the Uchiha compound, Naruto completely at his new boyfriends mercy.
AN: Mwahahahahaha poor little uke Naruto, what will our poor Sasuke do to him? Well if you want to find out you have to review. I will only add a second lemon part if I'm happy with the response I get for a continuation. The fic will stay M and complete for a week if I don't have enough reviews by that time I will change it to a T and just leave it alone. But that's only if I'm not happy with the responses so if you want a lemony SasuNaru twoshot then please R&R. And okay I'm done…so I hope you have enjoyed it and yeah. Thanks for reading!!!
Luv
BlackEyedWicca