Intro/December

There is a darkness locked in everyone's heart. It's that sneaky, quiet voice telling you that the prank you've pulled isn't so nasty, you're not right until you have the last word, revenge is sweet, that pit in your stomach has nothing to do with your guilt, and somehow everything is always your fault so you might as well not try to change things from what they are. It's only when the darkness completely eclipses the light, even for a second, that we are suddenly aware of the absence of light and hope in our hearts. By then the damage has been done and it's too late to pretend.

I'd like to offer my story to you, from one lost soul to another. You may find it a lesson, some salvage from forgotten faith, or just a meaningless compilation of someone's pitiful life down a crooked road. I, myself, don't really know. One could only know after hearing.

So come on, sit right down. Comfortable? Take your time because I'm going to take mine. Ready? Okay, here we go…

-

December came to New York City like a ferocious wolf in sheepskin. The days started off pleasant with the exception of winds that nipped at your flesh like the claws of a cat. As the day wore on overcast skies blocked out the sun. It seemed decent enough until mid-afternoon came around and the winds were bitter enough to freeze your fingers off. This was exactly the time I had to brave the outside and take the subway to work. Even the frozen, dead air found its way down into those dark tunnels. Everyone was a snowman; pale and emotionless with stick-like legs and arms that rubbed against themselves for warmth. The hobos at the stations were collecting newspapers and stuffing them greedily down into their beer-stained sweaters. Their eyes were like the skies: a grayness that covered up a terrible light hiding behind them.

I walked into Antonio's Pizzeria just as a drizzling rain began to come down. The smell of dampness was met with mushrooms, cheese, and avocado. The glass windows were fogged with condensation, but no one else was around to see it. And a good thing, too! I look terrible. My blonde hair's clinging to my skull and I can't feel my fingertips. It's like I'm numb all over.

"Hey, Kujaku! Is that you?" I heard a voice come from the back of the kitchen. I took my time hanging my coat up on the silver hooks by the office. Even if it wasn't snowing outside, I'd have that coat on in public because of the stupid uniforms they make us wear at this shack. Stupid uniforms, stupid job. Damn stupid payroll, too.

The ovens were on and starting to radiate a hell of heat that warmed me up quickly. I went around passed the ovens and the dough kneading counter to where Antonio was standing above the sinks. He was a huge man with a beard barely poking out of his blubbery chin. He always had this strong smell of pepperoni that passed through me stronger than a hit to the head.

"Kujaku!" he barked when he saw me. The scowl on his face was demonic with his beady eyes and three-inch thick eyebrows. I rolled my eyes.

"What is it?" I asked.

"What is it?!" he shouted. Good thing we're in the back of the kitchen otherwise he'd drive any incoming customers away. "What is it?! You're half an hour late! You didn't even show up for work yesterday! What the hell do you think you're doing?!"

"I told you, I couldn't make it yesterday!"

"Couldn't make it! Couldn't make it?!" Antonio was always repeating things you said to him. It got on my nerves something awful. Hell if I was gonna tell him I was out job-hunting again yesterday. God knows I need to get out of this stupid hole.

"Listen Kujaku, you miss one more day of work and you're fired! Ya hear me? Fired! Gone! Expired!"

Yah, yah, he's been saying that for weeks.

"You think I'm kidding?!" he remarked when I rolled my eyes again. He was fired up. Little blue veins were starting to protrude out of his forehead. "Fine! This is the last straw! You're––!"

The chink of bells from the front door stopped him short. We both looked over to see a guy walk in with a musty dampness clinging to him. I looked back at Antonio. The veins in his forehead slowly began to recede and he swallowed his anger down. His Adam's bowling-ball bobbed up and down quickly.

"Go take his order," he said.

When I came to the back to tell him the order (I took the orders, balanced the drawers, and made a few deliveries while Antonio made the pizzas. It was a small shop and there was rarely more than the two of us working a shift) he said I had one more chance to keep the job. I told him whatever. I got out at seven thirty. Antonio made me stay an hour later than usual to make up for missing yesterday. He probably won't pay me for it either, the bastard.

I took the subway back home again to my apartment. Its a couple odd blocks away from the Empire State Building. There isn't that great of a view (unless you love looking at the concrete wall of the next building over) but I never have the windows open anyway so it doesn't matter. Yesterday was payday, so half of my paycheck has already gone to paying my rent…which I am behind on. Again. The rest of the money I get to use for food, subway fare, and other stuff like that. When all that is done I'll have $3 left over total for savings. Again. Some "land of opportunity" America was.

Yeah, sometimes I really wish I was still in Japan… things were so much simpler back then. I had my convertible, there was a new duel monsters tournament every couple months or so I could kick butt at, and I was surrounded by my friends. Yugi and Anzu…and Jou…

"Don't start," I scolded myself, reaching into my purse for my keys. If I leave myself alone with my thoughts too much, I swear I'd go crazy. Can't have that. Not now. I––

"Hello, Mai!" a little pig-tailed girl approached me from the side. I looked over to her and immediately recognized her dimple-cheeked face. Helen.

"Hey baby!" I said. A huge fake smile overtook the grayness of my face. She laughed and outstretched her hand that held two white envelopes between her delicate little fingers. She reminds me of Shizuka a lot, especially with the red hair.

"Daddy told me to give you your mail today," she reported. "And that he needs to talk to you about the rent again."

I suppressed the feeling in my gut that made me want to cower away from the light of Helen's smile. Instead I took my mail and gave Helen a hug. "Thank you. You be a good girl now, okay? Tell you Dad I'm here if you need a babysitter again, alright?"

"Okay!" she said. "Bye Mai!" I let her go and she ran back down the hall to the elevator to go tell Rick. Rick's the apartment manager, you see. Nice guy, not too stern. Just a balding middle-aged man who didn't talk much. I liked that because I didn't have to answer any questions.

I finally fished my keys out and walked into my room, locking the door behind me. I kicked off my shoes and walked down to the open hallway to my bedroom so I could change out of my retarded uniform and put some decent clothes on.

I opened my two letters. One was a gas bill that was two weeks overdue. I threw it in a drawer by the sink and vowed to write the check for it later tomorrow. God knows I'll forget.

I went to open the second envelope and suddenly noticed it was addressed from Anzu Mazaki. Anzu?! Why would she start writing to me again? We've all grown so out of contact with each other since I've moved here. The last time she wrote…geez, it must have been in March or February!

The letter opener sliced the white paper open and I eagerly read the message, hoping nothing was wrong. I looked at the words confused, as if they were written in code. Then I realized they were in Japanese kanji and I clawed at my brain to remember what everything meant. It took me an hour to read the two short paragraphs.

Dear Mai,

Hey! How's America been treating you? Everyone over here is doing great. I can hardly believe you've been gone for over a year and a half! It seems like you were just here yesterday… Sorry I haven't been keeping in touch, but I've been soooo busy and I'm sure you have to.

Anyway, the reason I'm writing to you is very urgent! You know how I've always wanted to become a world-class dancer? I entered in a competition and passed the preliminaries! Now they've invited me to a professional audition for a musical! But here's the thing—it's taking place in New York! Can you believe it!? The whole gang's coming with me, too! Our plane will be arriving December 11th around 10pm at the International Airport. Sorry it's such short notice. Hope to catch up with you!

Yours truly,

Anzu Mazaki