So, about the title... I actually said that once. Well, I thought it. ...Yeah. Oh, and please note that I have never actually seen an entire episode with Tsunade in it, so correct me (kindly if you will) if I make her too OOC. Thank you.

disclaimer: Mystery solved. I don't own Naruto. Let's sing a song!

Didn't Do It... On Purpose

Prologue:
The Crime Scene

CRASH!!

Iruka ran into the Academy classroom. The moment he stepped inside, three things immediately stood out to him: a) there was a huge, gaping hole in the wall where the chalkboard had once been; b) said chalkboard was lying on the floor, a cloud of dust rising from it; and c) Naruto Uzumaki, Sasuke Uchiha, Neji Hyuga, Kiba Inuzuka, and Akamaru the dog were shouting at each other off to the side. Okay, Akamaru was really just barking, but Kiba claimed it was shouting.

"What in the world is going on?!" Iruka exclaimed.

The four ninja and one ninja dog instantly shut up and stared at him. Then they all cried out simultaneously, "He did it!" Naruto pointed to Neji, Neji pointed to Sasuke, Sasuke pointed to Kiba, and Kiba... well, Kiba somehow wound up pointing to himself. He realized his mistake after a second or two and pointed to Akamaru, who was accusingly (but adorably, nonetheless) nudging Naruto.

Iruka rose an eyebrow. Somehow, he highly doubted the dog was to blame.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Okay, let me get this straight..."

The accused five were sitting in the Hokage's Tower, preparing to be interrogated by Anko. Needless to say, they were thiiis close to peeing their pants. And Akamaru wasn't wearing pants, so do the math.

Anko went on. "One, if not all four--"

"Ruff!"

"Fine, all five of you, actually knocked the Academy chalkboard out of the wall??" The suspects nodded. "..I don't know if I should be asking who or how," Anko said, a question mark popping up above her head.

"Here's an idea."

Everyone turned to the door to see Tsunade step into the room.

"Where have you been?" Sasuke asked.

"Nothin' you kids need to know about," she replied dismissively. In that instant, no one really wanted to know anymore.

After a quick little awkward silence, Anko spoke up. "...You were saying, Hokage-sama?"

"Oh, right. I was saying, my idea is that we ask all four of--"

"Arf!"

Tsunade looked at Akamaru for a moment. "...Kiba?"

"Yes?"

"Can your dog talk?"

"Well, I can understand him, but... no, not really."

"Then we won't be asking him."

"Uh... asking him what?" Anko whispered.

"We will be asking our four human suspects what happened and who is to blame for... uh..."

"Breaking the Academy."

"Thank you, Anko. And who is to blame for breaking the-- ...Wait, did you say breaking the Academy?"

"It's a long story, Granny--"

SMACK!

Go ahead and guess.

Yup. Naruto rubbed the huge, newly acquired bump on his head before going on. "Aaanyway... It's a long story that I can honestly and clearly explain..."

XXXXXXXXXXX

What happens next? Who did it? What insanity will Naruto blurt out? ...Be patient, I'm still writing it up, so I don't even know yet, if it makes ya feel better.

so anyway, please r&r :)