Once upon a time, Itachi was walking down the street when Sasuke jumped out with his emo make-up smeared from crying. Itachi stood in shock, his arms raised with a step back. Sasuke collapsed to both knees and held his face as he sobbed. Itachi let his arms drop and stared at Sasuke, his eye twitching.

"What is it, Otouto?"

Sasuke dropped his hands to his sides and looked upward at his brother.

"Nobody loves me" he exclaimed through his choked sobs

"I..Well, I love you. What you are now is... well, pathetic. I do love you, though, you're my otouto. Now get up. You sicken me." Itach kicked Sasuke's knee roughly and glared at him.

Sasuke fell forward and hit his face on the stone ground beneath him.

"But-but I.."

"Get UP," Itachi snarled, kicking his side. Sasuke stood up shakily, holding his side with one hand and his face with the other, holding back his tears as he straightened himself up.

"Good," Itachi said softly.

Sasuke wiped his eyes attempting to rid his face of the tears and stained make-up. Itachi pushed Sasuke's arms to his side, making him stand up straight.

"You need to present yourself strongly. Try looking like a man for once."

Sasuke pushes his shoulders back and chest out, attempting to look strong.

"I am a man. A great one" he said under his breath.

Itachi lifts an eyebrow. He then punches Sasuke straight in the stomach.

Sasuke doubled over, clutching his stomach and coughing roughly.

"W-why?"

"Because you're still really, really pathetic," was Itachi's reply with a shrug. "Wanna go get ice cream?"

Sasuke stood up quickly and grinned.

"I want Mint Chocolate Chip!"Itachi smiled back.

"WRONG ANSWER!" he yelled, while grinning, and kicked him in the stomach. Sasuke fell over on his side coughing up blood and crying.

"Why God? Why?!"

"You just leave so many openings!" Itachi laughed, kicking him again. Sasuke squirmed on the ground, crying and begging Itachi to stop. Itachi sighed and kneeled down next to Sasuke.

"Now, why should I stop? You still look pathetic. You're not even fighting back."

Sasuke looked up at Itachi and, almost pleadingly, said "Because you love me? We're family.."

Itachi laughed for a good minute before calming down with a small sigh.

"Of course I love you. I know we're family. But I can't stand being related to something so pathetic! Fight back!" He poked Sasuke's arm. Sasuke glared up at Itachi.

"I hate you!"

Itachi poked Sasuke roughly again. "You know you don't. You love me! On top of that, you feel guilty for killing me."

Sasuke attempted to stand up and fell back down. "No way.."

"Heey," Itachi said, standing up as well, "I'm just trying to help. Want to go get some ramen?"

"Sure.." Sasuke said weakly as he once again tried to wipe away his tears.

Itachi chuckled and punched Sasuke in the face. "Wrong answer again!"

Sasuke grabbed his face as blood ran down his cheek. "Argh!"

Itachi rolled his eyes. "You're being so melodramatic."

"It's what makes me cool though! It makes me seem dark and mysterious!" Sasuke cried.

"No. Just... no." Itachi signed.

"I'm totally cool, just ask Sakura" Sasuke said sitting up.

"Sakura's a bitch, Sasuke," Itachi sighed. Itachi then picked Sasuke up by his hair. "Staaand!"

Sasuke grabbed up at Itachi's hand and whined. "Alright alright, I'm standing. And you're just jealous cause Sakura doesn't like you"

Itachi puts Sasuke down and kicks his shin. "I don't like her either, so that's ok. I'm most certainly NOT jealous."

Sasuke grabbed his shin and chuckled. "Sure you do, she's uhm...well..she has a great personali..no...she's...Almost STD free? Yeah that's it."

"How do you even know that?" Itachi asked, backing away from Sasuke, sickened.

Sasuke grinned. "Trust me, I know, she's only got Herpes and Cyphilis. She's 75% clean."

Itachi's eyes widened in disgust. He backed further away from Sasuke.

Sasuke took a step forward. "By the way, she wanted me to ask you something."

"Wh....What?" Itachi asked, taking another step back.

Sasuke takes another two steps forward. "She wants to know if you want to go over to her house for 'Dinner'.."

"Uh, no, I'm good." Itachi stood his ground.

Sasuke shrugged his shoulders. "I thought you'd say that, that's why I drugged your lunch. You'll pass out in about 20 minutes."

Itachi stared at Sasuke. "We.. Haven't had lunch yet."

Sasuke frowned. "Oh right..I was supposed to do that later..Uh..Want to go get some Ramen?"

Itachi rolled his eyes and punched Sasuke in the stomach again.

Then he giggled.

Sasuke rolled over on the ground for a moment and passed out.

Itachi stopped giggling and walked over to Sasuke.

"Heeey... Get up." He nudged him with his foot. Sasuke twitched slightly.

Itachi looked at Sasuke, annoyed. "Get... UP."

Sasuke twitched again and began foaming at the mouth.

"Otouto, you need to lay off the drugs."

Sasuke squirmed a bit more before convulsing and coughing and waking up slowly.

Itachi nudged Sasuke awake and waited patiently for him to say something.

Sasuke coughed weakly. "Brother...Sakura..gave me..rabies..I am...dy...dying.."

Itachi burst out laughing. "You're funny. Want some ice cream?"

Sasuke groaned. "No way, I remember last time."

"Good! As a treat, I really will get you some ice cream! Stand up, let's go!" Itachi laughs and stands back up.

Sasuke stood up quickly and smiled brightly.

"Really!?"

Itachi smiles back.

"No!" and kicks him in the groin. "Just kidding, let's go get some ice cream!"

Sasuke leaned over holding himself. "O-okay."

Itachi grinned and helped Sasuke stand up straight. Sasuke stood up and brushed himself off.

"Ready?" Itachi asked, smirking.

"Yes." Itachi then linked arms with Sasuke. Sasuke smiled and began skipping away with Itachi. As they skipped, Itachi laughed and used Amaterasu on Sasuke, let go of his arm, and continued to skip, singing joyfully to himself.

"Saskue, follow! Come get your ice cream!"

Sasuke stumbled after Itach, determined to get his ice cream as black flame whipped away at his now smoldering flesh. Itachi looked back at Sasuke.

"Foolish otouto," he giggled, "you look silly!"

Sasuke reached forward with one hand as if grabbing for Itachi as his flesh melted away, giving way to the bones and muscles in his hand. "Argh...."

Itachi holds Sasuke's ice cream (which appeared out of nowhere) just out of his reach, giggling.

Sasuke limps forward, nothing left of him but exposed bone and muscle. "Ice...creeeamm.." he rasped.

Itachi felt a little bad for Sasuke, so he gave Sasuke the ice cream.

"Sorry, Sasuke. I'm not a very nice brother right now." He shuffled his feet in the dirt, causing a small dust pile to go into the air and all over Sasuke.

Sasuke attempted to lick the ice cream as his tongue was melted away. "Damn..you.." he said, as he collapsed and died alone and emo and smelling a bit like burnt hair.

"Hey! Narrarator! He wasn't alone! I'm here!" Itachi said, scoffing. "Plus, he killed me. And anyway, this is just a dream."

I poked Itachi on the top of the head. I meant that nobody loved him. Plus if its a dream I wouldn't be able to do this. Everything explodes.

THE END!

This was made over AIM in a conversation with KowaretaHikari ;D We're great. I know it. Kowareta was the Sasuke lines, and I was the Itachi lines. X3 What fun!!! ;D

Anywho, Yeah. R&R and I'll even write a story with you, if you want. Though, I doubt it'll be this great. :'D

ILUALL!

Credit to teh maker~ ;D Kishimoto ftw.

Hehe.