Yes, you are seeing correctly. I am back. I left a full explanation as to my absence in Zaratan's forum if you want to know what's been going on with me. I want to give a special thanks to Molloy for reminding me about this story in time for Valentine's Day. Those of you who have been here awhile will remember this was born out of the Little Black Dress craze started at Deviant Art and the various message boards last year. You may notice that it has been 'updated' but is pretty much the same. If you didn't catch it the first time, then it'll be just like buying a brand new used car. Either way, enjoy!

Oh, almost forgot. Rated T for smuffy situations...

Kim, Ron, and all other characters within are owned by the Walt Disney Corporation.

Confessions of a Little Black Dress

Part I: Black Holes Be Damned

by Ultimate Naco Topping

Whoa…

I mean, whoa! Kim thought as she looked at herself in her full-length mirror. As she smoothed out the last couple creases in her outfit, she found there was absolutely no denying it: she was smoking! Maybe, a little too smoking.

After weeks of begging, Kim had finally agreed to let Monique take her little black dress 'up a notch'. Kim made a mental note to discuss Monique's definition of 'a notch' with her. Very little was left to the imagination. The dress, which had pushed Kim's limits to begin with, now wrapped around her like a thin coat of paint. She sucked in a couple deep breaths only to realize that her merely breathing was going to be, to say the least, of interest to most guys at the party. That was of course if they kept their eyes off her legs which were now exposed to the same level as her cheer uniform.

Modeling each leg out in front of her, the redhead began to think how funny context could be sometimes. Show this much leg while leading the cheers at the game? No big! Show this much leg while going to a party? Whoa! Kim had never really 'shown off' before. That didn't mean that she wasn't aware she was considered a very physically attractive young woman. It just meant that she preferred being modest about it. She was a role model after all…

But tonight, she felt, required something different. Recent events had led to talk and rumors, unanswered questions and uncertainties making Kim feel as though she needed to make a statement. The plan was simple: single out a certain blonde haired head of beef from the herd and make sure everyone knew what the sitch was between the two. She just wasn't sure she needed to go this far…

However, before Kim could give any more consideration to her pressing (and curvatious) fashion dilemma, the aforementioned blonde haired head of beef announced his entrance to the Possible household with a "Hello, anybody here?" in the entry hall. Kim virtually jumped into her matching set of high heels and for the first time realized why the more 'experienced' girls of Middleton High swore by them. The teen hero had worn high heels before, but never with a dress that could display their full effect.

Twisting to get a better look at her backside, the words 'quarter' and 'bouncing' came to mind. If she wasn't already convinced that the boys would have trouble looking her in the face before, she was now. Not that she really cared about the effect her appearance would have on the other boys.

Kim gave herself another chance to change into something a bit more modest. After a few seconds of reflection, though, she resolved herself. I'm Kim Possible. I can do anything. That now included strutting her stuff on the arm of her life-long best friend, sidekick, and now, boyfriend.

"Eat your heart out, Bonnie," Kim said with a near smug sense of satisfaction before grabbing her purse and her compact and darting out the trap door to her loft.

--

Ron Stoppable was a self-proclaimed ladies man. A factual extrapolation of this statement would yield only a long string of rejections, a few dozen harebrained schemes to gain dates, and a couple of near misses. If the blonde had only known it was as simple as saying four little words like 'out', 'there', 'in', and 'here' to a girl tied up to a giant cactus while he himself was tied to a giant burrito, he'd probably still have a long string of rejections, a few dozen unsuccessful schemes, and a couple of near misses.

Yet, it did indeed happen and it worked. The weeks that followed the prom were a whirlwind to the less-agile member of Team Possible. His popularity soared. The guys swarmed him with 'ata-boys' and 'way to go's'. The girls swooned as the love story of the year strolled by them. Although they had yet to go on anything that constituted a 'date', he and Kim were more inseparable than Dementor's bonding ball formula. Everything was perfect. Well, almost perfect.

The whispers started, no doubt, in the upper echelons of the Middle High School social hierarchy. They moved rapidly down from there. During the last week before summer break, it was unavoidable to hear the name Ron Stoppable without the association of a missed basketball shot being pulled down by another player. Even someone as oblivious as Ron couldn't avoid the so-called logic of the argument. The most self-confident of men would have worried over their situation. Despite it all, the blonde knew that Kim was different. He just wanted to be sure.

He got his reassurances in a rather unexpected way. They were returning from Costa Rica after saving a village from a mudslide. Kim initially insisted on studying for finals during the flight back but quickly ditched that plan before curling up on Ron's shoulder and falling sound asleep – Ron watching her the entire flight home. Somewhere near the end of the journey, Kim shifted in her sleep and muttered, "Your turn to take the kids to school, Ron."

Rebound my monkey power enhanced butt, Ron thought as he twisted the throttle on his little blue scooter as far as he dared. That wasn't far, mind you, as the scooter flaunted the Laws of Thermodynamics with its continued ability to function. Poor state of his ride or not, the blonde haired teen hero had no intention of being late. Tonight, there was no denying. He was going out on a date as the real deal boyfriend of Kim Possible.

--

Ron remained nervously still just inside the Possible's front door. He had, for almost thirteen years, entered the home as he pleased. But now, he felt just a little uncomfortable doing so. It just wasn't standard boyfriend protocol to barge in as usual.

He was just about to announce his presence again when he was jarred by a loud thud near the top of the stairs. Kim looked down on him with a confident but reserved smile. Good, he remembered to dress up, she thought as she observed her best friend turned boyfriend gawking up at her. The red head didn't spend anymore time than she had to at the top before bounding down the stairs.

For Ron, time slowed to a crawl. Words like 'badical', 'K.P.', 'look', and 'you' came to his brain which, in turn, failed to assemble them into a sentence and speak them. The teen was entranced by the all-powerful display of femininity heading towards him. He didn't even notice Kim shouting to her parents that they were leaving and that they shouldn't wait up. They were halfway to his scooter before Ron managed to speak.

"Kim, you…, you look incredible!" he exclaimed with more confidence than he thought he could muster.

"You're looking great yourself, Ron," Kim cooed as she grabbed the spare helmet.

The dilapidated scooter creaked and moaned as the two teens climbed on, but it held together.

"You ready?" Kim asked as she wrapped her arms tightly around the boy.

"Absolutely," Ron said bringing the scooter's engine sputtering to life. With a bit more effort than usual, the vehicle rolled out of the driveway and out into the warm early-summer's night. Black holes be damned…

To be continued…