Note: THIS IS NOT SUPPOSED TO MAKE SENSE (just look at the title, for crying out loud!) this was not meant to be written especially well. To quote Finding Neverland, "it's just a bit of silliness, really." I just wondered what it would be like if Yuki had found out about his fan club (they really are scary, aren't they?), and if a random transfer student had met the Sohma children. If this is confusing, let me know. I'll try to clarify. One-shot. And . . . enjoy!
Yuki stood in a corner of the classroom, leaning casually against the wall. But his princeliness was nowhere to be found. His silver eyes were bloodshot, his hair was a mess, and his shirt was unbuttoned and untucked, his tie hanging loosely around his neck.
A young girl, new to the school, approached him. "You're Yuki Sohma, right?"
His eyes suddenly widened in fear. "No I'm not! I'm not Yuki Sohma!"
The girl stared at him in stunned silence. "I . . . um . . . I was sure . . ."
He grabbed her by the shoulders. "Who told you I was Yuki?! Are you one of their spies?!"
"Who . . . whose spies?" she stammered weakly.
"The spies . . ." His voice dropped to a whisper. "Of the fan club."
She shook her head. "I don't . . ."
"They're watching me, aren't they? With their binoculars . . ." He cupped his hands around his eyes to demonstrate. "And they follow me around, making notes . . . and making merchandise! I once saw a plushie . . . of me! And keychains . . . and pictures . . ." He was breathing hard now, glancing from side to side like a madman.
The girl put her hand over her mouth, alarmed. She quickly turned and ran. Yuki continued pacing, ignoring her hasty retreat.
Haru (yay, it's Haru!) came up behind Yuki. "Hey."
Yuki jumped. "Oh. It's you. Good."
Haru raised an eyebrow, and pointed at a grove of trees. "Pretty trees," he commented.
"Oh no!" Yuki scrambled away. "They must be hiding behind those trees! WITH THE BINOCULARS! AAAAAAAAAHHHH!" And he ran home, screaming.
The girl came up to Haru, shaking her head. "What's with that guy?" she asked.
"Believe it or not, he was once a normal human being," Haru answered. "Until he discovered what exactly his fan club was doing behind his back."
She crossed her arms and sniffed. "Yeah, right. I don't think a bunch of girls could freak someone out like that."
She was interrupted as fifty or so girls sped past, carry binoculars, notebooks, and stun guns. "YUUUUUKIII!!!! COME BACK!!"
The girl turned back to Haru, her eyes wide. Haru nodded. "Told ya so."
Kyo suddenly came whirling around the corner. He skidded to a stop, looking victorious. "Where's Yuki?" he demanded as Tohru caught up. She was panting.
Haru shrugged. "He ran away. The fan club was stalking him again."
Tohru's eyes went wide. "Oh no! Should we . . . should we go after him?"
Kyo snorted, laughing evilly. "Of course not. Damn rat deserves this." He paused, considering. "Actually, I think we should follow him . . ."
Tohru gaped. Maybe he realizes that Yuki needs our help, she thought hopefully. Maybe they can be friends!
"Why the sudden change of heart?" Haru asked, interrupting Tohru's fantasy of Yuki and Kyo vowing to be friends forever.
Kyo grinned. "To see that damn Yuki trying to escape those fan club girls."
Tohru sighed. Or not . . . she thought bleakly.
The girl glanced from Haru, to Kyo, to Tohru. The people at this school are so beautiful.
"KYOOO-KUN!!!!"
The girl started, then whirled around. She ducked, just as another girl with dark brown hair sailed over her, tackling Kyo.
"Kagura!" Kyo shouted angrily, pushing Kagura off him. "What the hell are you doing here?!"
Kagura winked. "I just thought I'd come see you, Kyo-kun." Kyo glared at her, and Kagura's expression softened. "It's okay, Kyo-kun," she said softly. "I just like to come and hang out with you . . . as friends."
He sighed. "You just love to piss me off, don't you?"
She laughed. "Well, that too."
This unusual conversation was interrupted by the arrival of everyone's favorite rabbit. (No, not Bugs Bunny). "Hi!" Momiji shouted, dressed in the girl's uniform, as per usual.
The girl gasped. "What—" she began weakly.
Kyo shook his head. "It pisses me off when you wear that uniform."
Momiji glanced down. "I like it," he said, his voice trembling.
"Yeah," Haru added. "It looks good on him."
"We are NOT having this conversation again!" Kyo exclaimed.
"Want a lollipop?" Momiji asked, turning to the girl (who really needs a name, doesn't she? Oh, well).
She turned and walked away, shaking her head. "This school is so weird."
What'd I tell ya? It's strangeness personified. Well, please R&R!