a/n: Hey my loyal fans I know you've been dying to read the next chapter so here it is. I really hope you enjoy it because it took me a while to come up with it…not really…hahaha… R&R!!!! (Song by Linkin Park-Numb)

Chapter Five: Numb

(Past)

Flames to dust

Lovers to friends

Why do all good things come to an end

Flames to dust

Lovers to friends

Why do all good things come to an end

come to an end come to an

Why do all good things come to end?

come to an end come to an

Why do all good things come to an end?

I knew who he was talking about…but I had to hear it from him…just to make sure… "Soubi who is "she"?" he then looked me in the eye where his eyes were haunting and held depth behind them…

"Your mother…"

I lost it…I could not believe she took the easy way out…she did the foolish thing by killing herself just to be free from all the problems in the world…how very selfish of her…

"There was something else…" I waited for him to continue "All over the walls she wrote in her blood… "not my son…not my son…not my son…"

"chuckle" I couldn't help it…it was the only thing I could do… "You know what's funny…she said the same thing…when she tried to kill me…" the tears came out again but this time Soubi was there to comfort me and help me through this…

My name is Ritsuka Ayogai, I am 13 years old, and I am an orphan…I have no mother…a father who doesn't really give a crap about me…my brother was killed…and this is my life…as LOVELESS…

Well the dogs were barking at a new moon

Whistling a new tune

Hoping it would come soon

And the sun was wondering if it should stay away for a day til the feeling went away

And the sky was falling on the clouds were dropping and

the rain forgot how to bring salvation

the dogs were barking at the new moon

Whistling a new tune

Hoping it would come soon so that they could die.

(Present)

Ritsuka's P.O.V.

As I laid in Soubi's arms, trying to sleep, I couldn't escape the horrible images that were going through my mind. I couldn't sleep for I feared that once I closed my eyes I wouldn't be able to open them again. 'No, I could not sleep and I would not sleep.' I gently moved out of Soubi's arms and moved to the edge of the bed hoping he wouldn't stir. 'Soubi I wish I could stop this…all of this…I just can't take it anymore.'

I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes

With that thought in my mind I quickly ran out of the room and out the door to the outside where a storm was in affect. "I can't take it…I don't want this…I just want it all to stop…" I was suddenly hit with a gust of wind, at full force, into one of the sliding glass doors, making it shatter into millions of pieces. It's a miracle no one had woken up with all this noise. I soon found myself covered in shards, and blood flowing out of all the wounds, which covered my body. I could feel the cold rain hitting my skin, the shards digging into my back, the dirt getting into my wounds causing them to sting like hell.

'Soubi…I feel so numb…I can't even feel the rain hitting my skin…or the blood flowing from my veins…not even the pain that once struck my very core…' I was soon surrounded in darkness and thought only one thing… 'Is this what it feels like to be numb…to the point you can't feel any pain?'

(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

I soon felt the ground under me shake and the rain coming down harder on top of me…it soon surrounded me in a puddle. 'puddle?'

I awoke and found myself to be caught in flood outside. I couldn't believe it…how long was I out? How come no one has found me? Or noticed me missing? Have they forgotten me?

I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

"I see you're awake…took you long enough…"

'What!?'

I forced myself to look up and found myself looking into the eyes of a man I had never met before…but for some reason I felt as if I knew him…but why?

"Who-who are you?" I forced the words out of me knowing I wasn't going to last in my condition if I stayed out here any longer. I picked myself up with whatever strength I had left.

Can't you see that you're smothering me
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
And every second I waste is more than I can take

"I see…well there's no reason you should know who I am…but I'm surprised Soubi hasn't told you about me…after all I was the man who sent him to kill you…"

:thump:

Can't you see that you're smothering me
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
And every second I waste is more than I can take

:thump:

And I know
I may end up failing too
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you

:thump:

I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

'Him? He was the one who wanted me dead?'

I'll admit I knew for some time that Soubi was sent to kill me…but I never thought I would meet the actual person who sent him after me. Never in a million years…but now he's here practically telling me he wants me dead.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why kill me? What did I ever do to you that you had felt reason enough to kill me?"

:chuckle: he laughed off my question, which personally pissed me off, he then began walking towards me…I instantly knew what he was planning…but for some reason I couldn't move.

I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

'Why can't I move? What's keeping me from escaping?' I flinched when I watched his pale fingers reaching for my face, and yet I still couldn't find the courage to move. He caressed my face, like a man would do his wife, except this was meant to be a final farewell.

"You could have been a wonderful pupil you know that? I even informed your brother about my plans about recruiting you."

:chuckle: there it was again…that annoying laughter that only meant trouble for you.

"Although sadly, he didn't agree with "us" and that sadly…led to his demise…"

My eyes widened. He-he was the one who sent my brother into hells domain. Everyone thought he had committed suicide, but I knew…I knew there was something else behind it, but why my brother? Why him? If they wanted me why not just take me?

"Why…why did he have to die?"

"Hmm?"

"If I was what you wanted why not just take me? Why kill him instead?" I noticed the tone of my voice had increased because of anger. Why shouldn't I be angry? This bastard standing in front of me had my brother murdered!!!

"You-you"

"Yes…if you wish to speak before I kill you just speak…they will be your last words for sure…" his hand descended towards my neck in a painful grip.

I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

:gasp: I felt my breath decreasing as he tightened his hold on me. My only chance of living through this was a long shot…but I had to try…

"You…YOU BASTARD!!!" I screamed at the top of my lungs and kicked as hard as I could aim for his torso…thank kami it worked. He doubled over in pain, and let go his grip. Now was my chance to escape. I quickly ran for the door but fell flat on my face as I felt a hold on my leg. I look to see he recovered pretty quickly, too quickly, I thought. "Let go of me…" I was not about to have this asshole do me in like my brother.

He began getting up, still having a strong hold on me…and I couldn't bare it. His nails dug into the wounds that were still bleeding from my legs. I held back the tears that were stinging to come out. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of that.

"You escaped me once I won't let it happen again!!"

He lunged for me and threw his hands on my neck once again. Had pinned my legs under him and my arms were no use, for the fall had wounded them both seriously. (PICTURE AS IF YOU FELL AND PUT YOUR ARMS OUT IN FRONT OF YOU AND THE BOTH WENT SEPARATE DIRECTION IN THE WRONG WAY…OwO; yeah that's painful) I couldn't put much of an effort against him and I couldn't scream out for help because…

the storm was making it impossible for anyone to hear me

the man above me was making it hard to breath…making it impossible for me to scream

Kami…had decided to pick on me today…

"Don't worry kid…it will be over soon…who know I might decide to recreate my newest pupil into you…in memory of what could have been…what do you think of that?"

"Go-go-GO TO HELL"

"I think you've got it backwards…you see that's where you're going…"

And just like that everything in my world went black…again…hmm…is it me or is this happening a lot to me lately…\

All I know is that before I met the "darkness" I faintly heard the call of my name…'Ritsuka…'

'Soubi?'

Well…like I always say…better late then never…

a/n: Well there you go…I hope you like this chapter. I'm expecting at least 10 reviews…plz.R&R!!!

w ja ne

Oh yeah..thnx too:

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and everyone else!!!!!

Byebye